The Narcissistic Truths – No. 50


27 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Truths – No. 50

  1. Havana says:

    HG, if the crowd was really gone – no one there to fuel anymore.. what’d happen to the narcissist then?
    And what are you when the crowd is gone?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Hello Havana, in this context it means that when there are onlookers we maintain a facade and when they are gone we remove the mask and show the monster to the person who is left alone with us, usually the Intimate Partner Primary Source.

  2. she says:

    Indeed. I call mine Mr. Hyde. No lie. I even have his photo from the classic movie and name saved in my phone contacts as my narcs name. Maybe I myself am cruel for doing this, but hey he’s cruel enough to me as it is right?

  3. MLA - Clarece says:

    During a holiday hoover exchange with JN we had a brief banter over politics. Of course, we have different sides and I wanted to keep it light and airy but he started to fire off the insults, i.e., I voted the way I did because I’m uneducated. He’s so “disappointed” in me. Blah, blah, blah. I found it amusing and told him to stop going for the jugular because it wasn’t going to work. He said he wasn’t and he could go way nastier. I told him I’ve seen his nasty side up close and personal (you would agree to that right?). He replied twice, that I “barely” have seen how nasty he can get.
    I really do bring that side out in him, away from his family (huge part of his construct) and his lieutenants. Do you think it was beyond the banter him making sure I know he can get way nastier than I’ve even witnessed?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      He was baring his teeth at you Clarece.

      1. MLA - Clarece says:

        Underneath it all, it’s always going to be malign hoovers isn’t it? Because he knows I have him figured out now? Now it’s just fun to egg him on then.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          He may start with a benign but your resistance will bring it to malign rather quickly.

  4. noah80 says:

    It is just what we said yesterday… when the door is closed, leaving the world outside, a loto of things can change… the apparent fairy tale turns…

  5. 1jaded1 says:

    HG. Sad in many ways.

  6. Sail Away says:

    Aww. A little boy. 🙁

  7. Patricia says:

    How do narcissist act when nobody is watching? What do they think? Do they even enjoy being alone ?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      We read books, cook, watch films, watch sport and so on when we are feeling fuelled and have no need to gather any more. The Greater of our kind will be plotting and scheming too. If our fuel levels are low however, then we do not want to be alone, we will need to gain fuel and we will be doing so through technology whilst alone and/or organising some kind of interaction to gain fuel.

      1. Love says:

        Ooooh what do you cook?
        Do you plot by tapping your fingers together and saying ‘muh ha ha ha!’.
        Good day Mr. Tudor.
        Hope you enjoyed the football game you were to attend this past week.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I cook up plots, Love, what else?

      2. noah80 says:

        It is curious, you and my narc do the same things on your own, he is a chef as second job (the first is fireman…so he can play the game of hero) even write books, but he writes them to a single genre: erotic.

      3. Love says:

        Mmmmm, narc erotica, now that would be a great genre. I wonder what it would contain…

      4. 1jaded1 says:

        Unwittingly, sometimes they might be cemetery plots.

      5. Patricia says:

        I have always wondered if narcs need mental stimulation in addition to fuel. I know quite a few narcissists, most seem to be quite intelligent or talented/gifted in one area or another.
        I know you are quite sharp yourself, super analytical, plus you have awesome analogies. Love it!!!
        I listened to the interview with you HG on Out of the Box Radio. I was quite impressed how honest u are, but yet saddened how cruel you could be. I suppose, that’s your kind.
        I have read a few books about narcissist/sociopaths/psychopaths and I am quite familiar with this topic. I haven’t read any of yours yet. Is there a specific one that you would recommend to start with. I would like to learn more.
        Thank you

  8. Snow White says:

    Isn’t that the truth!!!
    I experienced this when we went to a water park with some of my friends. My ex was charming all day and then I saw the change as soon as we went to our room and and they went to theirs. It had been a long couple of days and I had my son with us. I was tired.
    She became moody and decided she was going to be silent. She turned the other way in bed and then I was crying.
    When we woke the next day she tried to tell me that she got up in the middle of the night and walked around the hotel and went to the bar. I am a very light sleeper and knew that was a lie, but went along with it.
    Looking back I can see how many times she did this.

    When my husband pointed out in the first couple of months that she was bad news I used all the people who loved her, respected her, and who thought of her as a person with a heart as an example to tell him he was wrong. The facade was always on.

    1. 1jaded1 says:

      It’s interesting how some people can see through the facade.

      1. Snow White says:

        Did anybody warn you Jaded? There were so many people that liked her and that made it impossible for me to believe that there was a reason for me to stay away from her.
        I’m not a logical, practical thinker and that hurt me. But that charming personality will always be a warning now.

    2. 1jaded1 says:

      Hi Snow White. This is gonna sound dumb, but I ignored my own warnings. My gut and head said something wasn’t right. Everyone else was charmed and I didn’t follow my instincts. N2 did so many things N1 did. Ringing phone off hook, saying that members of his family were dead to him, asking why I changed my outfit when he had no reason to see me in my work clothes. It was only after he backed off at the threat of me leaving did people think I might be right. Then it was too late.

      Yes, use your ezperience. Do not make the same mistake I did. I’m still paying for it as I just received 2 hoovers today out of “concern”. If your gut and logic tell you to run, RUN (away). You can do it.

      1. Snow White says:

        Good morning Jaded,
        Awwww, don’t feel bad I ignored my gut plenty of times because she was just “different” and had a “bad” life. I have learned so much here that and I will have a head full of red flags going off the next time I meet someone new. But most people aren’t getting past “hi” right now and that’s fine with me. Now I just need my heart to learn.
        Thanks for the encouragement!
        Does he live close to you? Does he still call?

    3. 1jaded1 says:

      The heart is the challenge, Snow White. Yours is up to that challenge.

      I live out of state. I escaped him (or so I thought) but the texts continue through 11.28. I can’t…won’t block him and that’s on me.

      1. Snow White says:

        I get that Jaded!
        I haven’t blocked her either and you would have thought that after everything I’ve learned here I would but I still can’t. One day my heart will get there.

  9. Dawn says:

    Ain’t that the truth 😏

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