H.G., do you think some are unaware they have a superiority complex? That in their mindset it is that someone failed to meet their expectation and they are wounded or hurt because they hold on to the adage of treat others how you want to be treated? In their mind they think they’re moral compass is stronger or that they are more virtuous? So then they are shocked if a victim tells them they have a superiority complex?
Absolutely Clarece, I entirely agree. It is also the case that some of our kind believe themselves to be caring and empathic because of the skewed perspective.
Great questions, MLA. My x was like that. My ex, when I suggested to him gently and with humor that he was arrogant flew into a fit, saying if anything he was too humble. I tried to normalize it by talking about times when I’ve been arrogant before…nope, no admitting to it.
It does make me wonder frequently how many narcicistic traits do I have (I know I have at least a couple) and sometimes I fear I could be one of the unaware ones…because. Think I feel others pain deeply… it what if I’m unaware???? .I ask myself this a lot and watch my tendacies. HG, you would tell me, right?
I haven’t seen anything that causes me to think you have strong narcissistic traits Indy, quite the opposite.
If I did think you were a narcissist (and of course one or two oblivious ones do visit from time to time) there is of course no point telling them as they will not accept it.
Hi HG, Thank you for responding. I am confused with your last sentence. Are you saying if you did tell me I was narcissistic, I would deny it? Or are you talking about others? I actually would be open to feedback, truly. I am a work in progress.
I try to watch myself, as I know I can be competitive and a bit self focused at times. However, I am trying to balance all those years of struggling with setting emotional boundaries, saying no and standing up for my self care. So, I suppose, because it is not second nature yet, it feels a bit selfish. I have to remind myself and my clients this, that it is healthy selfish.
Today, I was reminded of deep pain in another person’s story I heard at work that was so deep it physically hurt my chest. I think why I have been questioning my narcissistic traits is that I created an emotional wall too, from my ex, so I wouldn’t feel his pain when I left, at least not as badly. The wall was broken into today. I feel more human again. It is interesting, that I would be scared NOT to feel, and you, my friend, are apprehensive TO feel (particular emotions).
I know someone like that, HG. She is always doing “caring” things. She also talks sierra hotel india tango about people and beats them down behind their backs. I cringe when she asks if she is not a good person bc she does all things caring. My time with her is limited and part of me wants to tell her that she is a mean, mean person who only does things for recognition.
So, are you saying that some of your kind “Act” empathetic and caring as long as they reap benefits from others? If so, I agree. Secondly, why does one need to admit he or she is a narcissist? Is it not just a label on the behaviour? Thirdly, have you checked your email?
Correct. We are able to feign empathy through observance and copying although of course we do not feel it.
There is no need to admit to being a narcissist and indeed that rarely happens because of the failure to recognise the behaviour and/or the totality of the behaviour which draws the label of narcissist.
Yes I have.
Marvlous job at taking those trees down, lots of firewood for chilly nights to be spent in front of a roaring fire, beautiful scenery to behold and all done with just an axe, Impressive HG a man of many talents.
The message is very clear yet I see many things in this picture, and you are a man with many wonderful talents. Writing is just one of them.
Hi Dawn,
I like that proverb! Never heard that one. And, as you may notice in the picture, the ax was originally a tree too, cut by another ax. And the cycle continues. 😕
However, the butterfly alight the blade speaks too.
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H.G., do you think some are unaware they have a superiority complex? That in their mindset it is that someone failed to meet their expectation and they are wounded or hurt because they hold on to the adage of treat others how you want to be treated? In their mind they think they’re moral compass is stronger or that they are more virtuous? So then they are shocked if a victim tells them they have a superiority complex?
Absolutely Clarece, I entirely agree. It is also the case that some of our kind believe themselves to be caring and empathic because of the skewed perspective.
Great questions, MLA. My x was like that. My ex, when I suggested to him gently and with humor that he was arrogant flew into a fit, saying if anything he was too humble. I tried to normalize it by talking about times when I’ve been arrogant before…nope, no admitting to it.
It does make me wonder frequently how many narcicistic traits do I have (I know I have at least a couple) and sometimes I fear I could be one of the unaware ones…because. Think I feel others pain deeply… it what if I’m unaware???? .I ask myself this a lot and watch my tendacies. HG, you would tell me, right?
I haven’t seen anything that causes me to think you have strong narcissistic traits Indy, quite the opposite.
If I did think you were a narcissist (and of course one or two oblivious ones do visit from time to time) there is of course no point telling them as they will not accept it.
Hi HG, Thank you for responding. I am confused with your last sentence. Are you saying if you did tell me I was narcissistic, I would deny it? Or are you talking about others? I actually would be open to feedback, truly. I am a work in progress.
I try to watch myself, as I know I can be competitive and a bit self focused at times. However, I am trying to balance all those years of struggling with setting emotional boundaries, saying no and standing up for my self care. So, I suppose, because it is not second nature yet, it feels a bit selfish. I have to remind myself and my clients this, that it is healthy selfish.
Today, I was reminded of deep pain in another person’s story I heard at work that was so deep it physically hurt my chest. I think why I have been questioning my narcissistic traits is that I created an emotional wall too, from my ex, so I wouldn’t feel his pain when I left, at least not as badly. The wall was broken into today. I feel more human again. It is interesting, that I would be scared NOT to feel, and you, my friend, are apprehensive TO feel (particular emotions).
Not you because I know you are not.
If someone came here and I identified that they are a narcissist, there would be no point telling them because they would not accept it.
I do think from what you have posted here you clearly show as more empathic.
Thank you for helping me sort out these thoughts and questions. Hope your day is going well for you!
You are always welcome Indy. My day has been excellent well so far, thank you.
I know someone like that, HG. She is always doing “caring” things. She also talks sierra hotel india tango about people and beats them down behind their backs. I cringe when she asks if she is not a good person bc she does all things caring. My time with her is limited and part of me wants to tell her that she is a mean, mean person who only does things for recognition.
So, are you saying that some of your kind “Act” empathetic and caring as long as they reap benefits from others? If so, I agree. Secondly, why does one need to admit he or she is a narcissist? Is it not just a label on the behaviour? Thirdly, have you checked your email?
Correct. We are able to feign empathy through observance and copying although of course we do not feel it.
There is no need to admit to being a narcissist and indeed that rarely happens because of the failure to recognise the behaviour and/or the totality of the behaviour which draws the label of narcissist.
Yes I have.
Hmmm no need for that You know it…. I sooo wish there was bo need for You to do it…
Like the guy who has to drive that waay-oversized truck & be obnoxious to other drivers on the road, an…overcompensation…?!
Yep. 😀
Marvlous job at taking those trees down, lots of firewood for chilly nights to be spent in front of a roaring fire, beautiful scenery to behold and all done with just an axe, Impressive HG a man of many talents.
The message is very clear yet I see many things in this picture, and you are a man with many wonderful talents. Writing is just one of them.
I like the proverb :
“The axe forgets what the tree remembers”……
(The narc being the axe and we are the unfortunate trees – wounded forever) 😞
Hi Dawn,
I like that proverb! Never heard that one. And, as you may notice in the picture, the ax was originally a tree too, cut by another ax. And the cycle continues. 😕
However, the butterfly alight the blade speaks too.
So true. Big one, not only for narcissism. Thanks HG.
Hmmm like the old math riddle asks…what did the acorn say when it grew up? “Gee I’m a tree”. You may cut us down but we will grow again…stronger.
Or the ACON when it grew up? Will it be a tree or ax?
Yes, Indy. That is a cryptic riddle. The ax/tree hasn’t completely fallen so maybe it hasn’t reached the point of no return.
Exactly! Or perhaps a skilled arborist can help mend the wound.