The 7 Sails of the FB Ghost Ship



Of all the various social media platforms that are available, Facebook remains a clear favourite with our kind. Its titanic status and near ubiquitous nature appeal as does the fact that it remains the demographic social media home of the majority of our victims. Facebook is used extensively but there is an occurrence whereby it appears that our once vibrant Facebook page has fallen into disuse. The profile picture never alters whereas it once changed several times a day to allow us to show off the latest snapshot of our brilliance. The timeline remains mournfully empty. There are no posts about our latest achievements and accomplishments. There is no sharing of the latest video we have uploaded or the link to YouTube for the same purpose. The only things that can be seen are the annual birthday well wishes from those reminded by the automated feature on the platform. There are never any replies to these salutations. There are postings from years ago but everything appears to be silent. Your friend request may have been accepted but nothing more has happened and now our profile drifts silently through cyberspace like some ghost ship. Why do we let this happen?

  1. Bring out the spyglass

Just because there is not anything happening on our profile it does not mean that there is nothing happening. We are using this profile to spy on you and others. We utilise it for the gathering of information prior to the seduction, we use it to keep an eye on what you are doing on your profile page during the devaluation and we utilise it to keep tabs on you in readiness for that hoover. Silent and looming we use the profile to watch you, waiting and calculating our next move. As you churn out the comments, posts and likes, we are watching, that small smile playing across our lips, forked tongue brushing those sharp teeth as we lie in wait.

  1. Triangulation

“Yes I am on Facebook, you can send me a friend request if you wish, but I never use it. I haven’t in years. I am too busy you see; I prefer to do my living in the real world. It is being with people that matters to me. I don’t need to herald what I achieve on an electronic platform, I let my actions in real life speak for themselves. That is what matters to me. I prefer to be face to face with people, seeing them hearing them speak and watching them.”

An earnest speech designed to impress you and con you into thinking that there is nothing to be wary about with regards to our Facebook profile. We triangulate you with a supposedly dead Facebook profile in order to cause you to admire us for being so “real”. Oh the irony. All of it is tripe. Made-up for the purposes of making us sound good. Apart from the last sentence. That one is true though not for the reasons most people would expect. That personal interaction is required because that is where the best fuel is.

  1. Deterrent

You are less likely to block us if you think we never use our Facebook page which comes in useful for keeping an eye on you post discard for the purposes of organising a hoover. If we are unlikely to use our profile or even read it then you are dissuaded from posting anything there which might upset our carefully crafted façade. Why bother when nobody reads it? By conning you that this profile is never visited you will similarly keep away from it and thus we reduce your chances of interference and also those of your supporters. This means fewer people to tackle online when the smear campaign is rolled out.

  1. Ever Presence

If there was no Facebook page, then you could obviously never look at it could you? By keeping it and not blocking you, you will keep returning to it post escape and post discard because you cannot help but want to know what we are doing, whether we are saying anything about you. You may not be minded to post anything in accordance with the point above (you do not of course want us to know that you are sneaking these looks) but you will look nevertheless. You always do. You keep returning to it in the hope of some posting, some development and some news. This keeps you linked to us and keeps us in your mind as each day you conduct your obligatory tour of our social media platforms.

  1. Cover Story

The lack of activity on our Facebook profile allows us to maintain plausible deniability. How can we be engaging in flirting online if we never go on Facebook? Look, nothing is happening. Here, check the messages. See there is nothing there and hasn’t been for months. I hate you being so controlling like this; why do you treat me this way? We use it to assume the moral high ground and provoke you into responding to our jibes.

  1. The Action is Elsewhere

You cannot seriously expect us to lose one of our main weapons in our game playing can you? Whilst our “real” profile may be dormant, the real action is taking place using a fake profile where we are gathering legions of prospective targets, engaging in flattery, flirtation and fabrication as we suck fuel from these individuals and look to identify potential targets for a closer approach to them. Do not think that the fact we use a fabricated profile will stand in our way to converting the seduction to a real-life interaction. We have a thousand lies to legitimately explain away why we did this and the intrigue will make you want us all the more.

  1. Resurrection

At some point we will crank the profile back into life and the proliferation of likes, postings and comments will begin again. We operate through contrast and this difference between dormancy and vibrancy will be used to our advantage and to your disadvantage. You can rest assured of that. We will suddenly engage with people and allow you to see it, but not engage with you, in order to continue our devaluation of you. We may spring into life and seduce you through the profile proclaiming that you are so special we wanted to tell the world all about you and use our Facebook profile (free from being cluttered with less worthy individuals) about it.

15 thoughts on “The 7 Sails of the FB Ghost Ship

  1. Cresta says:

    So what does it mean if they have blocked you on face book? Is it all part of the game to make me think he’s done with me because he makes it look that way,i can’t see him but he can still some how come see me?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      That is a silent treatment.

      1. Cresta says:

        So what’s the difference from a silent treatment vs discarding.

  2. sunbirdie says:

    Ahh.. the favourite tool.. FB.. where he can look like the good model citizen to all the people he is trying to impress using his main FB profile, but he also uses FB to stalk, manipulate, cajole, hoover, block, unblock, recruit new fuel, triangulate, and live incognito in various guises using his other fake FB accounts…

  3. sarabella says:

    I am not FB friends and haven’t been for a few years. It went back on forth a few times on being blocked as he ‘allowed’ messaging. But I once set out to cause him alot of paranoia by smearing him to people he was using to triangulate with not probably so much with me but many others. I figured if I could make him cautious about posting, then I affected his game. And in fact, he doesn’t post personal stuff as much anymore and this was corroborated by someone who is FB friends with him, and says all he posts is politics and work. So either I messed up his last con job on some 17 year old enough he stopped advertizing, or he is doing this as you describe, or, he’s not so conscious and its all just changing times and he really is just focused on work. He posts only big life events, but the daily posts are gone.

  4. gabbanzobean says:

    I Personally found this a very insightful piece to read. Especially as mine has gone MIA on Facebook and on all other forms of social media.

    1. So has mine. But he reactivated his when he hoovered me, and after I exposed him and his lies, and let him know what I knew, he went no contact again. I haven’t heard from him since but I am sure he is actively using it. I was able to log into his account that he left on my tablet and I was able to see what he was doing behind my back, reaching out to females giving them compliments hoping to find my replacement, or future primary sources, yet it looks like he hasn’t been using it since we were together. Great post, HG. I finally blocked him so that I won’t go back and look for any signs of life on his page.

  5. ELLE says:

    Extremely relevant post HG.

    Having dealt with my somatic narc for almost 3 years I have seen cycles of this over AND over. He uses facebook (a fan page for modeling), a regular fb for ‘skydiving’, and probably one I don’t know about, twitter, and Instagram (often) The facebooks rarely updated anymore, and the IG goes off and on (as well as what kinds of posts are made). Sometimes even months of silence. He also uses snapchat. Phases of often and then many months of silence. I have never fully understood but this clears it up… I’m blocked on IG and one FB btw (to make a statement i suppose after I made him angry and have been for a long time now). I sometimes wonder if he ever checks up on me…

  6. Pamela says:

    Excellent article HG. Can you tell me why a narcissist who would use Fb and other social media to secure supply. Would not want a previous partner to know they are with a new partner. Do not most, flaunt their new conquests via social media for thought fuel, triangulation purposes etc? Would they hide their goings on out of fear of the new partner being contacted by previous partner or being smeared to their new victim?
    Everything seems such a game strategy.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Some will hide it because they are concerned that the previous IPPS will interfere and damage the golden period with the new IPPS.

      1. Pamela says:

        Yes, makes sense, self preservation. Would a narcissist hide it from a secondary or tertiary source as well?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          A secondary yes, tertiary not so much.

          1. Pamela says:

            Thank you, HG. Wouldn’t all social media appliances be tertiary, if not engaging in real life.

          2. HG Tudor says:


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