You’d Better


What goes through the mind of the Lesser Narcissist when he has decided that he must respond with regards to some transgressor, some traitor, some disloyal appliance which has affronted him in some way?  What are his thoughts as he bears down on the one who now represents everything that he despises? Whether they have escaped him, exposed him, challenged him or some other capital crime against the Lesser Narc Empire, what is his response? This is a glimpse inside to understand what is his mind-set.

You’d better fucking get in line you bitch because you’ve messed with the wrong marine. You’d better get your backside back where it belongs and do as you are told. You’d better shut your hole, open your legs and give me what is my right. You’d better keep your mouth shut otherwise I will shut it for you. You’d better not go crying to your brothers or I will beat the shit out of them too. You’d better get back to our home and you’d better be there by the time I get back, do you hear me? You’d better listen to me and you’d better listen good, I own you, you are mine and if you so much as think of ratting on me, I will make your life not worth living.

You’d better understand that I wear the trousers around here and the sooner you get used to that, then the easier it is going to be. You’d better not start letting your mouth flap to people and telling lies about me, you know what happened last time you did that. You’d better do as you are told because it is for your own good, yeah? You’d better get back here and do it straight away, do you hear me? You’d better have a good excuse for what you’ve done, I am sick of you not doing what I want. You’d better learn your place missy.

You’d better get this house tidied. You’d better have my dinner ready. You’d better have some money for me for my beers. You’d better not have eaten my do-nuts. You’d better get that damn child of yours to shut up so I can watch the game in peace. You’d better dress pretty for me. You’d better stop dressing like a whore. You’d better stop talking to the neighbour ‘cos I know what’s going on, I’m not stupid.

You’d better stop with those long words you use, thinking you are all clever and mighty. You’d better forget any idea of going back to school, you belong here with me. You’d better remember whose side you are on. You’d better remember who looks after you. You’d better remember that if it was not for me, you’d still be living in that shit hole with no money. You’d better not be taking the piss out of me. You’d better not call me stupid. You’d better not treat me like a fool. You’d better stop with those ideas, you won’t be anything. You’d better stop trying to better yourself. You’d better stay with me.

You’d better stay away from her, she is trouble I tell you. You’d better tell your mother to shut her mouth, who does she think she is talking to me like that? You’d better give it me or I will just take it anyway. You’d better stop making things up. You’d better leave me alone, can’t you see I am tired. You’d better stop your moaning, I will get a job when I want to. You’d better stop your nagging or I will make you stop. You’d better stop going about your needs, I am sick of you being selfish.

You’d better give me a baby soon or I am finding someone who will. You’d better get rid of it because I sure as hell don’t want no kid. You’d better go to the clinic. You’d better be in when I get home or there will be hell to pay. You’d better have it fixed or else. You’d better stay out of my way because I am this far from beating you down. You’d better stop taking his side. You’d better believe me when I tell you I didn’t do nothing.

You’d better not call the cops. You’d better not say anything. You’d better tell them the truth and that you made a mistake. You’d better tell them I was here all night. You’d better not touch my phone. You’d better let me see your ‘phone. You’d better not complain. You’d better not moan. You’d better give it to me or I will just do it anyway. You’d better get a new one then. You’d better pass me a beer. You’d better find me some money. You’d better get off my case. You’d better clean this place, it’s a shit hole. You’d better get off your fat ass and do some work.

You’d better run back home or I will come and drag you back. You’d better tell your father to keep his nose out or I will break it. You’d better answer me. You’d better pick up. You’d better open this fucking door or I swear I will kick it down. You’d better not be seeing nobody else. You’d better be in by ten. You’d better not be flirting with him or I will kill you both. You’d better stop going out. You’d better stay in. You’d better do what I want. You’d better know what I mean. You’d better not make me repeat myself.

You’d better wipe it up and get on with it. You’d better pretend everything is alright. You’d better make sure he is gone when I get home from the yard. You’d better not have those kids there. You’d better ring your mom and tell her you are fine. You’d better get used to it because that’s the way it is. You’d better enjoy yourself. You’d better smile. You’d better stop that crying. You’d better show you like it. You’d better show me that you care. You’d better do it right this time. You’d better get on with it.

You’d better start showing me some respect. You’d better realise that I am the boss. You’d better start earning your keep. You’d better stop complaining. You’d better shit or get off the pot. You’d better show me that you love me. You’d better stop being jealous. You’d better realise they’re my friends. You’d better stop being such a pain in the ass. You’d better stop trying to be better than you are. You’d better remember where you come from. You’d better get with the programme. You’d better do it my way or get the fuck out. You’d better stop this. You’d better quit messing around. You’d better suck it and suck it good. You’d better have something I like to eat. You’d better not have made any of that foreign rubbish. You’d better have paid the bills. You’d better not have used my car. You’d better not have let her in. You’d better not have spoken against me.

You’d better let me do it or I will find someone who will. You’d better put out for me. You’d better take it and not cry. You’d better quit asking. You’d better know what I meant. You’d better stop trying to confuse me. You’d better stop blaming me when it’s your fault. You’d better get out of my way. You’d better see that you do. You’d better tell him what’s going to happen if he keeps doing that. You’d better be a good mother. You’d better start taking better care of me. You’d better smile.

You’d better get me something for this headache. You’d better quit your backchat. You’d better make this pain go away. You’d better sort this mess out. You’d better take the day off work to look after me. You’d better get your mom to have those damn kids. You’d better give me some peace. You’d better stay home and help me. You’d better go and find someone who can help. You’d better get it fixed. You’d better deal with it. You’d better sort it out. You’d better not have done. You’d better not have fucked it up.

You’d better realise I can do what I want. You’d better know you can’t stop me. You’d better understand I call the shots round here. You’d better do what’s right or else. You’d better know who is the boss.

You’d better stop being a bitch. You’d better keep your legs shut. You’d better be a man. You’d better stop being a pussy. You’d better be there. You’d better be here. You’d better be nowhere I can find you.

You’d better make things good again. You’d better be waiting for me. You’d better not be going to your parents. You’d better not be telling tales about me. You’d better not be ringing the police. You’d better not be grassing me up to them. You’d better get back home right away if you know what’s right for you.

You’d better do what I fucking well want.

You’d better shut the fuck up. Now.

You’d better.

32 thoughts on “You’d Better

  1. Dear Johnny Come Quickly with Little Fanfare (AKA Lesser Ex),

    You’d better realize I am never getting into line and you are one marine who I’m going to sink. The hole my words come out of is called a mouth honey; the one you bleat from is referred to as an anus. It’s a pleasure to have acquainted you with biology 101. No, I won’t open my legs for you. You can’t spell sex offender but I can so you don’t need to play charades anymore.

    The house is pretty tidy although there’s a sack of feces I am having trouble getting off the couch, it’s wrapped in skin and zip tied with hair. I am making arrangements to have it removed as its fetid festering and perfidious putrefaction will be repugnant to the guests I continue to invite over.

    I realize you cannot understand these long words and therein lays the pinnacle of my motivation in using them. Your stupidity requires no illumination and you are not in danger of setting the academic community on fire, other than through arson.

    No, I will not be sucking your putrid, puny, protrusion prone to pitiable premature performance in this lifetime. If I am ever in need of a toothpick, I’ll just go buy some.

    I left all the donuts for you as requested. They looked tasty but the thought of your coronary artery fatally imploding after years of chronic saturated fat consumption was even more appetizing to me.

    This dress makes me look like a whore you say, perfect. Let me bring it to a gathering and change into it after I ‘accidentally’ spill a drink on the ‘mother’ outfit you deemed suitable. As the compliments abound I shall be sure to mention your thoughts on it to those you want to impress the most.

    You do wear the trousers around here and they may even look decent on you if they were the right size and you worked out and were slightly taller with greater muscle mass. You are not, however, the boss of me and you better learn that Sonny Jim, good and proper.

    I won’t be doing what you want so assimilate that into your perverted psyche my nefarious, nitpicking, no – brainer narcissist. You may put the jerk into knee jerk and have an Honorary Doctorate in Mind Fuckery but YOU BETTER BEWARE as hell hath no fury like Super Empath scorned.

    Tricky (AKA Your Worst Nightmare)
    There’s no symbol for kiss my #*$ or I would be adding it right here.

    1. NarcAngel says:

      Lesser Said

      I think Im in love.

    2. Star says:

      Lesser said the better; Love this, well said, absolute truth:)

    3. Klm says:

      Agreed narc affair. I hope you continue to share on this blog lesser said.

  2. Narc affair says:

    Ive never been with a lesser and honestly never would bc they scare me how outwardly abusive they are. I listened to this on utube this morning and it reminds me of what youd typically think of when you hear abusive relationship. This is why narcissism and in particular covert abuse i think had gone undetected for so long bc its not obvious in the way a lesser would behave.
    My sister in law is married to a higher level lesser. Hes not physically abusive that i can see but he is very angry and doesnt feel any empathy for anyone including his wife. Here are his you betters…
    You better find your own drive! Im not driving you into the city. You better keep working to support us i shouldnt have to work with a “bad back”. You better get that pension and apply for another job. You better forget about traveling and no i have no interest in a vacation away with you. You better not expect me to take you grocery shopping your mum can do that! You better not talk badly about me to family. You better not expect me to take care of “your dog” while youre away and that includes work. You better not question me when i get bored and want to fill a void by trading in the truck or spending money we dont have. You better soothe me when i get in a depressive mood and start to act out. You better lie for me when i play gaslighting games on family. You better play dumb and pretend it wasnt me who did that. You better cater to my every need or ill make life difficult for you. You better back me when im against that person and smearing them for no good reason. You better stay by my side regardless of the terrible acts against you. You better support me bc you are my softpimp wife. You better be my mother and take care of my every need. You better order a tiny meal bc i want a huge meal and we dont have enough money. You better occupy me when im bored but leave me alone when i want you gone. You better be back from your walk to cook my dinner. You better remember my treats and redbull drinks when youre out shopping. You better spoil me like you always have. You better kiss my ass so i dont cause trouble and stress. You better walk on eggshells for me bc i matter most. You better do as i say or ill take off like ive done before. You better behave or ill get hooked up in drugs or act unpredictable. You better not rock the boat or your world will be topsy turvey. You better remember who controls in this relationship its me.

    I honestly dont know how she puts up with it!

    1. Narc affair says:

      I forgot the most important one. You better not get sick bc its your mum who will be looking after you. You better not expect me to go to the hospital with you.

      Such a loser 🙁

    2. Yolo says:

      Narc Affair,

      That’s horrible to be subjected to that level of disrespect. I am sure you have introduced her to HG blogs and books.

      It you could put her in any of HG’s categories which one would it be? If I am prying, accept my apologies in advance.

      My sister is a codependent, her significant other may have not said those things out right. His past actions or lack thereof I have proven to be similar. He’s been there physically although never really contributed equally. My son pretty much took the role of her youngest dad. When, I say this week are talking about a kid in his 20’s not saying he’s perfect the jury is still out on him.😊 I love him with all my heart but I may have , over compensated due to my lack of availability.

      She’s always making excuses, she works two full time jobs as a nurse. 3 to 11 pm and 11pm to 7 am the overnight job is flexible and only 5 minutes away from the other. They have been together for about 25 years and he worked maybe a total of 8 and not simultaneously.

      It’s very hard for me to continue a relationship with her because of how oblivious she is to the behaviours of matrinarc, sociopath sister and him.

      I have tried to warn her and as soon as the mother or sister do them. She wants to vent with me. I blocked her last week. This morning she called and said she’s on peace😊 and cutting ties. Note: she stopped complaining about him, because I kept asking when she was putting him out and that I would help her with court documents.

      Sorry for long vent.😊

      1. Narc affair says:

        Hi yolo…it sounds very similar to my sil situation. Shes been with her narc for 20 yrs. She has slipped and confided in her mother and very rarely me or hubby but as soon as we offer solutions like make him get a job or leave she clams up. She doesnt want to do anything to upset him bc then the gaslighting and weird stuff starts to happen. I do wonder if hes psychopathic. Hes done really oddball things in the past. I do worry for her if she did leave bc he is capable of anything. Hes very unpredictable and would have nothing to lose. Her mother who she relies on heavily is a midrange narc and relishes being the hero mother. She gets to control her daughter even more as a result of her daughters lesser narc hubby. My sil is caught between two narcissists feeding off of her. Its so sad.
        I cant introduce her to HG’s work bc im here anonymously otherwise i definitely would. The other reason is shes totally brainwashed and she would look at me as the enemy or that im putting her marriage down. Shes very much blind and seems to want to stay blind to the situation.

        1. Yolo says:

          Narc Affair,

          That’s very unfortunate. I bet he’s a coward, he has nothing to lose. He has the luxury of laying around while she works and support his sorry ass. You would be surprised how they change once you involved the authorities or get a family member involved that gives zero f**is like him.

  3. You better you better you bet. Anyway, Never dealt with this in a romantic way, but have witnessed this behavior. Sadly a lot of women think this is all they are worth. The way this is written will definitely help some. When you put all of their comments down together, you see how absolutely crazy it is to stay with someone like this. Because these comments are rolled out gradually it is harder for some to see the abuse. It really is an erosion of the victims self esteem in an insidious way. Thanks for this HG.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You are welcome.

  4. Louise says:

    Well hats 🎩 off Mr Tuder, you have just scripted my ex’s entire vocabulary during our relationship and still continuing now as unfortunately we share a child.
    My interest lies in how he’s now managed to manipulate his current victim into joining in with his abuse towards me.
    She’s an extremely intelligent lady (as am I), she has read my correspondence word for word, but still he manages to manipulate her thinking.
    When I write a message, he will read and twist what I’m saying (attempting to read between the lines), assuming I have an alterior motive (which I don’t and am not capable of). He will then, somehow amazingly (as he is boarderline elliterate), convince his partner, his friends, the authorities and anyone else he wants to devalue me to…..that I am causing him distress and that my messages say something entirely different to the words written on the screen.
    Can you please provide some insight in to this ability? Especially as his actual IQ is very low. It utterly berwilders me. Thank you. 😊.

  5. Jess says:

    Ok, my Narc was a lower mid range not just a mid range. He said some of both of these. Omg I laughed hard at “you’d better stop with those long words you use” he said that a few times hahahaha and I laughed when he said it then said “you’d better get a dictionary because I can sound a lot more photosynthesis” (he ended up laughing at that and the fight was over)

  6. E. B. says:

    Excellent. Fortunately, the Lessers are easy to detect. I believe they have NPD comorbid with ASPD.

  7. Nin says:

    Yep. From a doting gentleman to all of the above.

  8. AH OH says:

    You Better! With a picture like this there would be no way for me to do anything but laugh my ass off.

  9. Yolo says:

    This behavior is more fitting for a psychopath schizo. Ugh, not the lesser I knew.

  10. Klm says:

    Karma- out of curiosity are you still with your n if he wasn’t abusive to you in anyway? If your not then what ended your relationship? I always wondered if I was the only one my n showed his true colors to.

    1. Karma says:

      Nope I left when he tried to devalue me. He turned cold after my massive criticism and I was about to find out about all his lies. The abuse can come in many forms .. he used me for my money, love for his children … so I was a maid, mom, provider and whore.
      I was taken for granted and ignored all of my feelings … everything was about him, his children (that I took care of) and his job. Then the real N came out …silent treatment, refusal to return belongings and denial as well as not being accountable for anything. The hoovers this passed month was my fault since I was a dumb empath longing for the children and hoping for a closure…
      “I’m sorry” just don’t make it for me…
      So covert abuse and I ended up with bad credit, homeless and with post traumatic stress syndrome. Still have major triggers … life very limited since I avoid places, certain food, tv, stores etc.

  11. SaraB23 says:

    Lmao at that picture!
    Douchebag pricks, I say eradication for the lesser.

  12. NarcAngel says:

    Exactly. Those two words. Every. Fucking. Day.

  13. Brian says:

    Looking forward to the Greater version
    possible titles
    “I will make you…”
    “You will…”

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You’ve already had it Brian.

      1. Brian says:

        Ohh it’s the “I want”, Thanks

  14. Serena says:

    This sounds like someone I know.
    Makes me feel like a rebellious teenager.

  15. Karma says:

    N is a mid-r however had a different dynamic with his other ex… shouted and the email communication was just horrible… the name calling and abusive behavior… never against me.
    Three instances when he lowered to the lesser with me was … take a pill!!!, you are hysterical and “I can contact whom ever I want!!!” So I made him behave like a MR… but to others lesser… I guess?

  16. Klm says:

    You better realize I left and am never coming back. You better realize I know who you are. You better realize I have never nor will ever belong to you.

  17. Stephanie Day says:

    What happens if we add Fane? Go no contact and don’t respond to you?

  18. Star says:

    The part that made me laugh out loud and that I heard often ,” you better stop with those long words you use thinking you are all clever and mighty”😂 That and ” I will get a job when I want to”. I kind of kick myself for being so tolerant and stupid….

  19. C★ says:

    i would never tolerate the lesser and thats why I never had one

  20. Snow White says:

    The Lesser sounds terrible. Glad I wasn’t with one of those. My ex never called me names.

    What type of Narc is your sister married to?

    1. Lala says:

      How quaint. Snow White beat me almost daily as a lesser narcissist. 10 black eyes, multiple hematomas swelling the lymphnodes on my bladder, a fractured skull, bone fragments and bone spurs in my face,a sprained neck, ripping most of my hair out, ripping up my money, taking my money and blowing it on unnecessary things to make me unable to buy a car, refusing to take me anywhere, threatening to beat me to death with a hammer, threatening ro slit both of our throats, pulling a knife on me, strangling me, threatening to kill me, taking advantage of me, cheating on me repeatedly, lying about me,etc…

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