Good Intentions


I want to give you my perfect love.

I want to look over you, protect you and care for you. I want to spread my wings and shield you from any harm that might come your way. I want to see you smile. I want to hear your uplifting laugh. I want to see you shine.

I want you to feel adored and special, I want you to feel my love for you that is beyond anything you have ever known before.

I want to feel your gentle touch upon me, I want to engulf you in my all consuming and never bettered passion, I want you to moan in delight at my touch and caress.

I want to be with you every moment of every day. I want to hear your voice calling my name. I want to see your texts filling my inbox. I want to see your name listed several times amongst the missed calls.

I want to be your sun so I light up your life and you orbit around me. I want to be your sole giver of warmth and life, the very thing, the only thing that you come to rely upon.

I want to dress you in finery, the best that I can afford. I want to see you wear what I suggest you wear and that you put that dress on just for me.

I want you to breathe my air, letting it fill your lungs and tasting so sweet that you will never want to breather the air of another.

I want you to see the world through my eyes, I want you to think the same way as me, I want you to anticipate my thoughts ,words and deeds as if you are living through me.

I want you to be a part of me. I want you to not know where you begin and where I end. I want you to taste what I taste, hear what I hear and speak with the same tongue as me.

I want you to become within me, assimilated into my being, an extension of me. I want you to discard everything you have known before and embrace me in totality. I want you to cast away your identity, your support groups, your social networks and instead be utterly dependent on me for your every need.

I want you to forget who you were.

I want.

27 thoughts on “Good Intentions

  1. Serene says:

    I don’t understand why everyone gets so worked up about Hush. This is the article that I love the most.

  2. Dandelion says:

    In one of his last messages he simply stated he knew that i no longer needed him anymore.
    I suppose it was a projection meaning
    HE DIDN’T NEED ME ANYMORE, having already found a new and more efficient source.
    But i also think he had to recognise my hard work on myself in order to emotionally detach from him.
    I almost totally erased myself to guest him inside of my heart, mind and existance….
    But something i can’t define woke me up one day.
    I was almost desappeared. But i was not!

  3. This sounds like a letter I would write to my inner child.

    HG I love your words.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you.

  4. Dr. Harleen Quinzel PsyD. says:

    I never gave up who I was. That is why we caught all the time. I gave up pieces of things but never the real me. Never the core of me… never my beliefs.., never my thoughts…he doesn’t he tto take that from me – I’d eat shit and die before that would ever happen.

    I would yell and scream and be defiant. I would never ever EVER be silenced. That is actually something I would yell quite regularly.

    I’d Laugh in his face.

    Sometimes I would be indifferent and tell him to go have a temper tantrum and then come back.

    He would tell me I was being disobedient…

    I dare a guy to ever say that shit to me….

    I’ll laugh in his face like I laughed in my exes face. All I can conclude from that statement is you want me to continue pissing you off lol.

    1. Dr. Harleen Quinzel PsyD. says:

      Fought all the time …

    2. Presque vu says:

      This is what makes me think I was narcissist. Told so many times I was by him. You describe so beautifully the dire situation. But your strength Dr Harleen is what he loved and despised! Never give up. Never.

  5. I don’t want to admit it. But this sounds good to me. I think this is exactly what I want.

    1. Dr. Harleen Quinzel PsyD. says:

      I can assure you the reality is pretty damn shitty.

      1. Presque vu says:

        Yes it is 🙁

  6. Just Me says:

    OK. Sleeping with the lights on tonight.

  7. K says:

    I want to hold your hand and show you the light. I want you to feel my love and tenderness. I want you to feel safe and protected. I want you to know you were perfect the way you were. I want you to know you deserved better. I want you to run wild. I want you to be free.

    I want you to be who you were supposed to be. (not a mirror)

    I want.

    (I like this post; I feel sad)

  8. Mona says:

    HG has to survive and HG needs food. Very simple in the end. Every thing of your logic or your construct is built around these two needs.

  9. Violet says:

    You are just completely insecure.
    Most of us who get ensnared are acting out roles we desire with a knowledge it’s for fun and fake.
    These kind if thinking on your part I’d garbage. Where is your logic?
    There’s no logic in existing only through others.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      But there is when viewed from our perspective. It is logical to us, but not to you.

    2. Yolo says:

      Violet, that’s why it feel so real to us, from their
      perspective we are great the best and will not fail them like the others. Eventually, our fuel becomes either stale, stop functioning or injure them.

      I think the lessor or mid want to do better but dont know how. If they are willing to face the beast (fear) that hunts their soul there’s a chance for behaviour modification. If you have to maintain a relationship with one the MMR or MRV are more tolerant if your issues are addressed.

  10. Scout says:

    I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I….. The self-absorption is so pathological and intense. I used to say to my exN ‘How about saying We or Us instead of just focusing on you?’ He’d looked at me like I’d just taken his dinner away. Self-absorbed people are so boring to listen to and they just can’t see it. Well someone else is listening to his over-bearing, false grandiose bs now and expecting her to forget who she is. Thank goodness I never gave up my individuality to a psychopath.

  11. Cindy Ragusa says:

    Well isn’t that the truth. They want and want and use and abuse.

  12. shantily says:

    Sounds all too familiar :/ until those intentions turn dark …

  13. MyTrueSelf says:

    On Monday evening – I would be hearing those exact sweet, charming things, virtually word for word!!! On Tuesday morning -brutal discard. Wednesday and Thursday -silent treatment. Friday – as if nothing had happened and everything’s back to ‘normal’ for him while I was I complete mess by then.
    – before I read about NPD&BPD. (I’m still a mess now if truth be told)

    There is nothing wrong with wanting what’s described in the first couple of paragraphs. I would want to both receive and give that, too. But then it runs into the pathology…

    Ex: ” I want someone who thinks like me”

    “You’re with me now, I expect more from you. You should know how I’m feeling”

  14. Noname says:

    The road to hell is paved with good intentions…

  15. Diva says:

    “I want you to forget who you were.”

    Some of us are more than happy to forget who we were or the issues that we had, or have and that is why your kind and our kind are magnets to each other. We are both trying to forget who we were or who we are to some degree and I believe us being with each other (empath and narc) allows us both to do just that.

    We both see in each other something that we never had or have never known, but desperately crave and when we come together it is spell binding……..until you spoil it with one of your hissy fits!!!!!! Diva

    1. Dandelion says:

      Diva i really do agree with you when you say that we (NARC and empaths) both seem to attract each other to work on that ancient wound that affects our existances.
      I feel a strong need to connect my higher self with his one.
      From a Human dimension i’m in no contact.
      But i think that we can still comunicate someway.
      There’ s a theory that says that we are all part of ONE.
      I deeply feel it inside.
      Even if i CANNOT communicate with ‘my own narc’, because he can’t or doesn’t want to listen to me, i’m doing this to another one who expressed the INTENTION to listen, communicate in order to understand.
      I expressed the same intention and life found the way.
      I hope it will work and i’m quite sure we share the same: heal, understand, cope, accept and connect each other.

  16. Mona says:

    He said that all, except the last three bigger paragraphs. He said that while we were having sex. He talked so much instead of enjoying. I enjoyed it, not knowing the hypnotising effect of his talking, when I was relaxed. That was the gate for him to get inside of me.

  17. Mona says:

    How scary. I never wanted to be a part of another human being. I have been that for so many years. No, never again. That is too much. This talking is an absolute – No go – for me. I cannot breathe. This is something to run away – at once.
    If he had said something like this- I know- I would have done something very impulsive. Run away, take another man or something like that.
    I have to breathe.
    I have more traits of your kind than I want to know. But I do not lie to hurt someone and I do not manipulate only for my own advantage. I have a conscience and I like people. I have moral standards for behaving and if I fail, I apologise.
    And I have – at least – cognitive empathy.

  18. thepianist20 says:

    “I want you to forget who you were”

    What a sicko! 😡

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