The Seven Truths About Narcissistic Friendships



  1. Our friends don’t really like you


The people that we choose to provide our inner and outer circle of friends have all been charmed by us and roped into our sphere of influence for the purpose of providing us with fuel, traits and residual benefits. They in return are granted repeated audiences with ourselves, they are able to gaze on the Sun King and benefit from their association with such a social titan. When you are admitted to my sphere of influence as an intimate partner these friends of mine only like you because they know that this is their role and they must do so in order to remain able to attend my court. Should I give the instruction they will turn their backs on you in an instant. Never believe that you can turn to them in a moment of need. You will head straight into a brick wall. Should you be admitted into my sphere of influence as another member of the inner or outer circle then these friends are your competitors. They are all seeking my favour, either to remain in the inner circle or to achieve promotion to it, such is the allure and attraction of being friends with me. These other friends will smile and welcome you, because that is what is expected of them but they are smiling assassins who will pounce and delight in plunging the dagger of isolation and ostracising into your back should I will that to happen. You are entering a viper’s nest.

  1. It is a one-way street

You will benefit from your association with me as a friend and you will enjoy my company, who would not when I am charming, magnetic and interesting but you are only allowed to occupy this positon so long as you are giving. You must provide me with the fuel to keep me topped-up through your praise and admiration. I expect you to be an errand boy for me, you will carry out my machinations on my behalf when I require you to manipulate someone by proxy, you will get me things, give me things and do things for me all because you want to stay in the elevated position of my friendship. It is also highly likely that I will possess some information about you or something you want which compels your compliance also. You are the giver and I am the taker. It is one way.

  1. Our friends do not know what we are

The blazing brightness of our brilliance is such that it obscures what we really are. Any complaints about our behaviour will be met with rejection and a confused response. They have always been treated well by us. We let them join us and we allow them to follow in our wake which has numerous benefits. They have no idea what we actually are for if they did they would no continue to be part of our retinue. They do not want to know any different however because they have been brainwashed into thinking that the status quo is to their advantage and therefore they see no reason to entertain anybody who seeks to usurp us.

  1. Your friends are all targets

I have no interest in making friends with your friends. They are beneath me but I will regard them as targets. There may well be your replacement amongst them and how satisfying would that be to corrupt one of your supporters to turn against you and sit at my right hand? I will charm and ensure that your friends think well of me as this will not only make my seduction of you as my primary source far easier, it will also provide me with fuel, traits and residual benefits as well. You friends are targets to be my new primary source, members of my coterie and even lieutenants so that I have a fifth columnist in your camp willing to act on my behalf when the inevitable devaluation begins.

  1. Our friendships are defined by the usefulness


As I have explained the concept of friendship for us all about what we can take from it and therefore so long as someone is providing us what we require, complying with our wishes and carrying out what we want then the friendship will endure. Should one of our friends see through us, turn against us or begin to fail in their assigned role it is of little consequence to us that we may have known them for ten years or more. It is of no concern that we go drinking with them every Friday, if they do not function as a constituent appliance then they will be switched off, excluded and replaced. We make friends easily and we keep them far easier than you might think. Very few leave us. We usually do the jettisoning.

  1. Our friends must never outshine us

We like our friends to be beautiful and handsome but not better looking than us. We like to have a beautiful crowd around us, it signals to the world that we are special. We want the interesting folk, the talented, the successful and so forth as we are able to steal traits from all of these people to accentuate our own success and popularity so we are better able to seduce more people into our sphere of influence. We want them to achieve, look good, be fascinating so long as none of them outshine us. We benefit from the reflected glory but it must not shine brighter than our star otherwise someone will have to be exited. There is only room for one king on this throne.

  1. We can actually like our friends

So long as the member of our inner or outer circle does not offend any of our requirements detailed above we often do actually like them for being interesting and caring people. Of course, this is not enough on its own, they must provide fuel, allow us to take traits and provide residual benefits but we are able enough to like the fact that someone is amusing, that someone is a good partner at badminton (as long as we usually win) or has some entertaining anecdotes to share from a recent holiday. So long as they do not transgress across our requirements then we will also take delight in these additional traits, for like jesters, ambassadors and courtiers in a royal court they all have their own individual function that serves to benefit us.

7 thoughts on “The Seven Truths About Narcissistic Friendships

  1. amanda SNapchat says:

    I am an IPSS to a greater. He met my mom and totally became her friend. My mom was like: “WOW THIS PERSON IS SO MAGNIFICANT…I THINK YOU SHOULD COLLABORATE WITH HIM!”….
    WTF MOM! My mom I feel is super smart and she can easily detect and read people. So I was amazed that she fell for that guy. They are really good. He is trying to get my mom on his side. Man oh man….

    I wanted to read this article because his friends are exactly like this. They are his servants. But it is also amazing how good they are at getting your people on their side.

  2. Rob says:

    In a big group of friends and aquantices having so many entanglements to one and another, can you tollarate the pressence of an empath whom is aware of the situation and reducing fuel or will there always be the threat from both sides of betrail, smearing and exposure?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      If that empath is a NISS, if the fuel is reduced that may in itself not be a particular issue since the individual is a NISS. They may find themselves shelved because more effective NISSs are chosen over them. If the NISS has other advantages (character traits and/or residual benefits) those may outweigh the disadvantage which arises from fuel reduction and therefore we continue to engage with them at a similar level of frequency.

  3. RJ says:

    I have seen it happen to a friend of mine. We all drank together as a group at times, hung out and stuff. Then out of no where this one guy just ignores and cut off and even belittled who I figured was one of his closest friends. I confronted him about it and there was/is no problem according to him. Even other people noticed and commented on it. I think it was all over the fact he didn’t like hearing the truth about himself.

  4. Sillyolperson says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,

    Narcissists don’t have “friends”

    They have “servants”

    They don’t know the meaning of the word “friend” !

    Eye opening article, Thankyou

  5. So, you can pick us victims out of a crowd, like a Hannibal? You can smell us, see our auras? I do appreciate your honesty, and the high-caliber writing.

  6. Paula Sarno says:

    Your kind is awful , I am sorry to say HG

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