The 5 Wants of the Narcissist


  1. I want your fuel


I want your fuel. I want it all and I want it from you, him, her, them and especially you. I want it from the moment I rise until the moment I am embraced by slumber. I want it pouring over me, potent and plenty, gushing from you. I want your positive fuel, the joy, the adoration, the love, the passion and the praise. I want your negative fuel, the hatred, the anger, the tears and the fear. Pour it over me, immerse me in that edifying, invigorating and sustaining fuel. There is never enough and I want to keep on experiencing the surge as your fuel increases the flames inside me, burning and rising, powering me as I blaze a trail through all that `I do. I want your fuel now, tomorrow and always.

  1. I want to engulf you

I am immense, a giant, a prince amongst men, a behemoth that moves with ease and purpose about the earth. I want to subsume you into me, ensuring that there is no trace of you left as I fully integrate you into what I am. I want my tendrils to reach out to you, feeling their way towards the fuel vapours that emanate from you, their probing senses tracking you down. I want them to coil about you and pull you towards me, binding you to me until steadily I suck you into my world and into my false reality. I want you hooked up, connected, locked-in, attached and embedded as little by little I consume you and encompass you with my greatness. You will not resist for the elation and delight that you experience as this process happens is irresistible. I want to own you, I want you to become part of me, I want there to be no start to you and any end to me.

  1. I want to be the one

I want to be the one that you think of all of the time. I want you to be the person that you orbit around, your sun, your centre of the universe. I want to be the one that is recognised for my greatness, for my brilliance and my achievements. I do not care that I have exaggerated them or stolen them from others whom I have brushed against, stripping away facets of their character to add to my own. I have no care for that. All I care is that I am the one towards whom heads turn when I enter a room. I am the one who is applauded. I want to be the one who leads, conquers and smites. The destroyer of worlds, the creator of new ones, a god. I want to be the one whose power radiates from him so that is tangible to all those who look upon me. I want to be the one who shocks and awes. I want to be the one who does. I want to be the one who rules, who presides and who dictates. I want to be the one you rely on, turn to and devote yourself too. I want to be the one who is credited for all successes, I want to be the one who is your alpha and your omega, your first thought and your last thought. I want to be the one whose name you utter with your dying breath.

  1. I want your essence

I am the stealer of souls, the charlatan that comes and with sugar-coated promises and offers you the world in exchange for your very essence. You never realise that this is the cost of this transaction but I want to suck the essence from within you, drain you of it and consume it for myself. I want to leave you a broken, dried out husk. I want your essence to fill the gaping hole that endures inside of me. I want that sweet, wonderful essence to flow through me, easing the pain, soothing the fevered freneticism and bring comfort and relief. Like a purifying river, I want your essence to course through me, sweeping away the disease that riddles me. I want your essence to wipe away the dirt, remove the smears and eradicate the stains. I know I flirt with all kinds of dirt, but your essence will save me from such temptation. That is why I want it.

  1. I want it to stop

Or do I?


6 thoughts on “The 5 Wants of the Narcissist”

  1. …well HG, do you actually want it to stop?

    Personally, I don’t think you do. I think you enjoy the power and control more than you fear the creature that threatens you.

    I think that while you have fuel, your lack of conscience and empathy makes you guilt-free and you just don’t care about the harm you’re doing.

    This is why awareness is so important. If your underhanded tactics are widely recognised and scorned by those around you, THAT is what will ultimately stop you.

  2. “I want it to stop
    Or do I?”

    You may seem calm and fearless but deep down you’re never like that. You locked fears inside of you and dedicated your life to hide them from you included. But…no amount of fuel from another will fill the emptiness you are not willing to fill yourself. You are the one not able to love your true self and that’s why you lack TRUST (in people, in life). You grew up pretending to be someone else, someone people must respect, admire or envy, everything but a normal man. Freedom is doing your best in a field and not depending on others reactions, just on you knowing you did as well as you could and the rest is not depending on you (it can’t make you or break you).

    “The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind
    The answer is blowin’ in the wind”…(Bob Dylan)

  3. “I want to engulf you”
    “I want your essence”

    This is why the narc kisses the victim.

    The first kiss btwn the narc and the victim is initiated by the narc.

    The victim thinks it is love. The narc just wants fuel and to engulf, and the essence. A reader commented some time back that while her narc kissed her, he said ‘i want to steal ur soul’ or something to that effect. The first kiss is indicative of the wants of the narcissist. Do not be fooled by this first kiss! GOSO!!

  4. The 5 wants remind me of the song ex narc used to seduce new IPPS. John Legend ‘ All of me, loves all of you’

    You’re my downfall and my muse
    Cause of of me loves all of you.
    All your imperfections
    You’re my end and my beginning
    Cause I give you all of me.And you give me all of you.

    You’re my end and my beginning
    Even when I lose I’m winning.

    It all makes perfect sense HG, he is a greater and played ‘catch phase’ with all his victims. The clues were there I just couldn’t see them. Music and song titles featured heavily in the game of Narc.

    Rachmainov – brief encounter and variations on a theme of Paganini
    Pink Floyd – Us and Them, dark side of the moon
    Radiohead – Aliens
    Elton John – Rocket Man
    Barry White – Don’t go changing
    Music from Romeo and Juliet, Tristan and Isolde and Madame Butterfly all tragic love stories.

    He was a fan of Royksopp.

    When you know you go.


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