The Rules of Ex Club – No. 15



45 thoughts on “The Rules of Ex Club – No. 15”

    1. It just dawned on me, now my ex narc boyfriend knows which ones are my comments. Knowledge is power . . . power to wound . . . but I don’t seek revenge. Waste of time and good fuel (I use to refer to fuel as energy).

      1. anonymous,

        I can mouse over your gravatar (patterned square) to see your user name.

        To remain anonymous, you should sign out of wordpress before you post. However you will not receive notifications to your wordpress account of replies.
        Maybe you can make another wordpress acount that does not identify you, and do not use it on any device that someone else may have access to.

        HG likely can still identify you on his end.

        I’m curious as to what is, and what color is my “ribbon”?

  1. . . . detail oriented . . . I wonder if u get tired of the blogging . . . ur books and articles are challenging sometimes, but I am tenacious and get the point(s) . . . U have natural brilliance. I will eventually get bored with the blog, not with your insight though ever, and I eventually will put you on the Shelf . . . not just my bookshelf lol.
    My life has changed greatly becuz of my narc (he knows I’m reading your books and he calls them OUR books lol). Of course he critizes your intellect as views himself as having greater intellect . . . he’s such a joke sometimes. Views himself as a Christian, too. Do you have a book on how religiosity plays out in the NPD world??

    I noticed that after a blog I wrote, an article appears the next day or two on exactly what I need to hear or get an answer to. But its coincidental and I imagine a number if the Others notice that, too, in their own regard.

  2. Is it from email address . . . I’m betting it is because of your intellectual skills and power of deduction, Sherlock.

  3. Like a teacher who remembers all their students names and learns from their writings, you know us. But I’ve intentionally changed my name 3 times. Do you know who I am?? Are you able to figure it out when someone does this? I know my ex comes on this site as he told me . . . .

    1. I think for April Fool’s we should all change our names to try to fool HG. We’ll be like kids all sitting in different desks and wonder if the teacher will notice.

      I am a bit bummed that ‘Hung Daddy’ is already taken, however. (You can see I am the problem student who needs to stand in the corner.)

      1. Bibi

        I see you as a valuable resource-not a problem. You take care of fleecing the other kids out of their lunch money in the coatroom and I’ll charge them a dollar to use the playground equipment. Theyre just going to waste the money on emoji stickers and glitter anyway. Wheres Sniglet? She can charge to stop making them cry from administering her death stare. Someone has to toughen them up and prepare them for the Narcs in high school.

      2. Hehe. Good idea, NA.

        During choir practice we will sing ‘We’re Not Gonna Take It’ by Twisted Sister. Then, I’ll sneak out the back, steal HG’s apple off his desk and replace it with a boring, unripe pear. This will be my forever fuel. All those amino acids!

      3. Oh, Bibi, is Hung Daddy already taken? I’d missed that. Here I was thinking it would be the ultimate description of my humble person.. Life’s not fair, first I meet a narcissist who screws me over and then when I need my healing process to proceed peacefully I’m met by this astounding revelation. Some sort of variation on the theme might possibly do the trick?

      4. Bibi,
        We’d probably have to conspire secretly, away from HG’s site (how could we arrange that?), to travel all over the world simultaneously to use another users device and location to try to fool him.
        I suspect even if we did so, he could probably pick us out from patterns of writing and certain words and terms we use to know what was up. LOL!
        Hard to escape those keen powers of observation!

  4. If you want to really wound a narc bring up how incredible they were in bed or something about how attractive you found them in some regard.
    That gets them doubting themselves and punctures holes throughout their fake alter ego. No one could possibly be better than them…or could they?

  5. Im not proud of it but i did once triangulate my narc with my ex by bringing the ex up. It was meant as retaliation bc my narc had been devaluing me and id had enough. Looking back it was nasty lol im glad i did it tho bc he was being a complete jerk to me. He tried to pretend it didnt bother him laughing at first then becoming quiet.
    When i stupidly apologized the next day…from guilt ughhh …he was very neutral and didnt show emotion either way. I cant remember but im sure he tried to devalue me more bc of it. It felt good to wound him but in the end its insanity. Once you enter their insane cycle you become them. I couldnt be bothered now i just disengage until he hits his reset button.
    I do have to laugh at how i built up the ex lol it was all nonesense bc i have zero interest in my ex.

  6. HG When do you think the evil/demons enter? Could it be when the narc is a child who learns jealousy envy hate and loves no more for protection? Hence the false self emerges.

    Did you injure animals when you were a child?

    And last I understand the amygdala (part of brain/center for emotions) grows deformed in narcissists/psychopaths/sociopaths ….why they can’t bond with anyone and seek to destroy.

    I would love to hear your opinion HG.


    1. There are no demons. It is a combination of genetic predisposition and the effect of environment which results in the creation of self-defence system.

      I did not injure them.

      1. Thank you HD The narcissist/psychopath/sociopath LIVES whole LIFE to harm people. That is not good but bad and evil!
        Demons are evil. I believe from research demons enter into narcissists/psychopaths/sociopaths Child because the child puts the real self/person away which becomes FOSSILIZED (they are with us no more)and presents false self for the rest of their life to destroy people’s lives. And being full of hate rage jealousy envy….reprobate mind in bible this would be someone filled with demons. Empty soulless demonic; why narcissistic supply needed psychopath sociopaths are independent dont need external to thrive but same. A healthy person would not even think this evil !

        Many narcissist/psychopath/sociopath are known to harm animals as child also stutter in speech or pee the bed etc. Feel abandonment and CAN’T cope with abuse so by coping the real self withdraws/becomes FOSSILIZED.
        Listen I have great compassion for a child that is abused /spoiling or harm but a child that grows into only harming good people I have no compassion for. They are evil and demonic.

        You didn’t respond about the part of brain amygdala/center for emotions being deformed in the narcissist/psychopath/sociopath
        Dr. Hare book no conscience no remorse did a brain scan on the healthy brain and narcissist/psychopath/sociopath. When the word cancer/disease was mentioned the healthy brain would light up with function whereas the narcissist/psychopath/sociopath Brain would not show any function. Dead.
        No conscience no remorse.
        The healthy brain was feeling sadness/pain for uncle aunt sister that died from cancer prematurely.

        Please tell me what you think about above?
        Thank you HD

        No one will understand what to look for or to recognize or to buffer a narcissist/psychopath/sociopath unless we understand how they tick. What their MODUS operandi is nor how evil they are.

        35% of the prison population are narcissists/psychopaths/sociopaths so imagine how many are on the outside not recognized.
        In fact the narcissist/psychopath/sociopath control this world. And we are their slaves.

  7. Hi HG

    i saw a positive comment on FB by one of my newly friend.. about Huge Hefner the Playboy magazine creator.

    But i think he was a greater narcissist.
    what do you think ?

      1. LOL Her new friend . . . thanks for the laugh . . . I need all I can get! I intentionally started mentioning my ex to intentionally wound him but only when he would start ‘crying’ about his Amanda, the one who got away. Smart girl.
        I made a LOT of mistakes becuz I hadn’t read ur book 50 Things Not To Do . . .
        Becuz I don’t FEEL good about ever wounding my ex. It started to become one upping each other . . . Silly really.

    1. My take on Hugh Hefner was that he brilliantly deduced that boys/men who grew up not being breast fed but given a bottle of milk via their nannies, obsessed about titties.

      1. I can’t picture Matrinarc as one that breastfed her babies. However, this made me wonder if she would breastfeed vs bottle feed each child differently. ie: breastfeed to give one child a perceived advantage over a sibling?

          1. I see no comment from HG. Drunks? On breast milk? I admit, it must be addictive!

          2. Mystery solved! Now we know where HG “caught” the narcissism. It was Matrinarc’s toxic breast milk.

          3. MB
            You think that cow could squeeze milk? If she could it would be curdled. And no I’m not going to aplogize to HG for all those who are gasping and clutching their pearls lol.

    1. Yes Kate.. especially if they keep bringing up their ex time and time again as perfect after initially branding them as crazy and horrible during the golden period.. now i realise he did kept doing it because i was in devaluation and the ex (who it turns out is still actually with him) is painted white… his merry go round stuff.. does ur head in ..

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