A Letter to the Narcissist- No. 18

A LETTER TO THE NARCISSIST.jpg

I’ve decided to make it work with him. I’ve got a good life. I know you don’t agree. You don’t see the value in our relationship or in being a stay-at-home mom? You say I’m not capable of getting and keeping a job. Interesting, tell me again what your record length of time holding a position is? Do you remember mine?

I’ve shared my goals, and my hobbies, as well as my values. I’m no longer interested in trying to control how you see me. I’ve listened to you mention various women and how you didn’t think she’d amount to anything and now, “she’s selling expensive paintings…she’s a therapist…she’s a pharmacist…she’s a nurse married to a Dr….” I’ll be one of those girls you have talked about. I don’t need you to believe in me anymore, just like they didn’t. I noted that you didn’t seem happy for any of them, in fact, you seemed almost annoyed. 

You told me once that you’re a chameleon. I believe you now. Deep down, you’re empty. You know I’m not and that makes you angry. You can’t stand the thought that I gave up everything for you then you destroyed us and he took me back. He gives me a life that you can’t even aside from money and that drives you mad. It pisses you off that I could really love him and try to make him happy, even though you pushed me away. You chose your choices. With me, with everyone. You destroy your relationships and never apologize for one single thing. You know I’m right too so you’re going to give me the silent treatment. 

I know your tactics. I know what you are. Nobody means anything to you. People are like chess pieces. You manipulate to gather information. No direct questions. You don’t give direct answers. No ability to build or maintain a relationship. Only judgements and criticism. You can’t face anything that you’ve done and you want me to be responsible for all of it. 

I can be honest. I can and do admit to my fuck-ups. I own my part, he knows this, and we’ll work through it. He was right about you. You knew it too, that is why you couldn’t stand for us to be amicable. You are jealous of him. You say he’s a fool. Maybe you’re just a mean fuck-boy that had a normal life and likes to cry.  You love attention. Go log on to eharmony, any hoe will do. Did you ever think if I’m so awful, why does he try so hard to keep me? Didn’t you stop to think, maybe I give him what I offered you? You know the life you relentlessly pursued then threw away like garbage as soon as I was pregnant with the baby you said you wanted. 

Go find someone else to conquer. To numb your pain. You know you want to go slap a band-aid on it. Find someone to tell you everything you want to hear, find someone to listen to you embellish how horrible I am. I hope someone is free quick. I wish you luck finding someone else that will put as much effort and love into you as I have. I knew you were disordered and I still tried everything to support you. You don’t believe me? Narcsite.com. You fit the description of a Lower/Middle Mid-Range Narcissist with a mix of somatic/victim traits. All those times I empathized and tried to relate to you? Well, I am a dirty empath, you’ll find me. I can face that and I can fix it. 

It’ll take a long time for him to trust me. I have lost quite a bit of freedom. Yes, he knows everywhere I go. No, that doesn’t bother me. I still see my friends. Does that drive you crazy that he has that much control over me and you don’t? Have you ever wondered he knows where you are? That one day when your guard is down, maybe you’ll get the ass beating you’re so paranoid about? Probably because it happened to you before, and you won’t know where it came from because you fuck everyone over. 

You’re a prisoner of your dysfunction. I am not the prisoner you say I am. I’m happier than you’ll ever be. The thing is, you’re too scared to be happy. You shouldn’t be mad at me. You got what you wanted. I gave it all I had and you didn’t want it. So move on. Fuck as many women as you want and call it dating. Make them think you love them. It’ll be a good life for you. Hopefully, when you get that third nose job one of them will help you out again. 

4 thoughts on “A Letter to the Narcissist- No. 18

  1. Mia Love says:

    Are the lights flickering in here or is this just me, lol

  2. Spiritual Warrior says:

    HG Tudor Please enlighten Me or Us, of the main Supply that stays, after they know the truth. They share the bed, the Narc has brought many women into, Who them, themselves didn’t know they were in a rotating harm. The main supply gets threats, mail, phone calls from the women who find out about her. This has been going on since 2001. They put their family of her children his children are at risk of finding out the dirty secrets.The GF puts their whole life on FG for US the women to find out about. HE is all over Google and her name is linked to his. Sick Sick and reckless. She and he the narc play games. BUT he stays with her. AS she is family. He says he is not in love, but HE does NOT know of what love is, only hurting with intent. I and some others, tried to help the main supply, as in 2015 I found out I was NOT the only one. I was dealing with a Narcissist. The main supply maybe had Stockholm Syndrome. I need to tell her and help her. For 6 months she was allowing her and I to be in contact and meet and text, talk on phone for 6 months. Then SHE turned on me. She went off on me like a crazy person. She has spit personality disorder or a Narc. herself. So a year later after maybe the tenth time of him and her being outed on cheating sites of his victims anonymously, who fond out he was a liar and cheater THEY the Narc. tried to pin it on me, so they took me to court for a restraining order. BUT the stupid kookoo GF bitch, forgot I had evidence of our Text and FB messages, of HER outing him as what he does to women and uses and abuses women.So WE now have a mutual stay away order. I feel, once the victims of the Narc. contact the main supply WE are not of use to him anymore. So he throws US the victims TO her the GF for her to use, lie and abuse us. We are a play thing for her. AS she mentally mind fucks us too. She tells us “OH HE did this one other time, sorry sweetie you are nothing to him. HE is just having fun. I don’t like it, and I do have my own fun too. OH I CALL THEM THE HOUSE OF HORRORS THE FUN HOUSE OF FIND FUCK RAPE. WHY Mr. Tudor is a Main Supply part of this. All I can think of is the Main woman of the Vampire. The Main woman of Charlie Manson. Who are they??? Thank you for ANY EXPLANATION ~Spiritual Warrior~

    1. Sara Jessica Snarker says:

      Although I have not experienced this unfathomable phenomenon first hand, I have witnessed a Primary so brainwashed that the Narc could actually have sex right in front of her and then solidly convince her she never saw what she thinks she did. Some of these women are so indoctrinated with Narc Venom that they will turn on you in a heartbeat if you dare to question anything about their man. Scientology is like a cakewalk compared to these evil Svengalis. It would take years of deprogramming for some of them and then they will still continue to defend the SOB long after he is gone. Sad.

  3. T says:

    Awesome letter!

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