Sins of the Empath : Honesty


The sins of the empath. These are the traits which are inherent to those who are of an empathic nature. You possess these traits; this is why you were picked by us. You may wonder why they are regarded as a sin? This is because in our view we consider them to be sins as we do not possess these traits. These traits are regarded, in your world, as laudable traits to have. These traits however make you vulnerable to us. They cause us to be attracted to you in the first instance and the existence of these characteristics means that they are ripe to to be exploited by us. These traits are good traits to have but because of us they become polluted, desecrated and exploited.

You cannot lose these traits. They are as much a part of you as your skin tone and eye colour. They define who you are. You may, unusually, try to rid yourself of them but you cannot. It would be like trying to rip out your own heart and still live. These traits are infused within you. For the most part you will be pleased you possess these characteristics, thankful that they assist you and define you, separate you from being one of us. You ought to be aware however of what these sins are so you know what it is that causes us to home in on you and furthermore how it is that we exploit these sins for our own benefit. With that knowledge you will be able to look to protect the relevant characteristic and ensure it remains intact and is not attacked, shredded or fed upon by us.

The first of these sins is the empathic sin of honesty. James E Faust said of honesty,

“Honesty is more than not lying. It is truth telling, truth speaking, truth living and truth loving.”

This aptly demonstrates how honesty is at the core of how an empath behaves. You utilise this honesty in everything that you do. It governs how you interact with people, how you speak to people and most of all how you conduct your intimate relationships. I am not suggesting that this empathic trait makes you a saint; you will not be above pocketing the excess change if the cashier hands you back too much money or refraining from telling a friend that the outfit they think is wonderful does not really do them too many favours. Your honesty is tempered with discretion and being circumspect when you identify that a lighter touch is required. You understand when being too honest with another is not appropriate. Nevertheless, honesty is of huge importance to you. You regard it as a fundamental factor of your character to act with honesty, both in terms of those you deal with and especially in respect of yourself. This core of honesty and its repeated application to your every day outlook in life makes it ripe for exploitation by us.

The exploitation commences at the seduction. When you engage with people, you have a tendency to allow your emotions and traits to be seen by all. You do not hide the way you feel. You do not operate from behind a mask (not like others you may know of) nor from behind a curtain. You do not cloud your dealings and operate in a shadowy manner but rather you exhibit who you are from the outset. This is of no consequence when you are dealing with your fellow empaths or even the normals but it becomes especially dangerous when you come into our sights. Not only do we have a heightened ability to sense the traits which matter to us, you aid this because your honesty means that you have all your characteristics on display. Just like a proud shopkeeper displaying his wares in a pristine shop window, you exhibit (but you do not flaunt) your inherent traits for the world to see. This means that your empathic and class traits which are so important to us when we target our victims are out in the open because of your honesty. You have an honest default setting. It is akin to having no privacy settings on your social media so that whoever takes an interest in you can see everything about you, everything that you have ever posted, where you live, where you have been, your photographs and so forth. This default setting is important to us as it makes our task of identifying you so much easier. When you are demonstrating those empathic traits through your honesty, they are highlighted, prominent and readily identifiable. Accordingly, if you keep wondering why you always seem to attract our kind, it is because your honesty is causing you to stand out to us.

Your honesty means that you engage with people without an agenda, without suspicion and providing them with the benefit of the doubt. This honesty of approach means that you fail to see those red flags which are fluttering during the seduction and that you fail to hear the blaring klaxons and see the flashing red lights which signal that something is amiss. You operate in an honest way and this causes your thinking to be framed so that you expect and assume that the person you are dealing with is honest towards you. This honesty takes you into the territory of gullibility. Add to this that we are of course not being truthful with you in the way we engage during the seduction and you have little chance of avoiding what we are doing; seducing you and doing so effectively.

The inherent honesty which you possess also means that you tell us how you feel and you will do so early in our interactions with you. Since we are engaged in love-bombing you at the outset it is nearly impossible to resist telling us how wonderful it feels and that you have fallen in love with us. Your early declarations in this regard are wanted and expected. Hearing this allows us, along with seeing the relevant indicators, to know that our seduction is proving successful and that you are being embedded. Gaining such knowledge is important for us in terms of ensuring that we have the level of fuel that we want but also in terms of allowing us to bind you closer to us, for instance by asking to borrow money or by moving in together. Your honesty results in your telling us what you are thinking and feeling, which in turn gives us the green lights we require.

Your honesty makes you transparent. You cannot hide anything from us and most importantly of all, you are unable to hide your feelings from us. Thus you will always struggle to hide you joy, your delight, your ecstasy, your pain, your tears, your annoyance and your agony from us. This emotional honesty is fundamental to why we engage with you. This means that the fuel you provide to us is purer that any which might come from another source. Yes, the “normals” will provide us with fuel through being happy to see us, through praising us or annoyed at being messed around by us. Even our own kind will provide fuel to another member of the brethren through exhibiting jealousy, annoyance or anger, but in both these cases there is an absence of emotional honesty which is prevalent with you as an empath. Your emotional honesty creates a fuel which is pure, free from toxins, devoid of pollutants. It is not masked, it has not been shrouded or clouded in some way, as is the case with normals and most certainly with our kind.

By being emotionally honest you ensure that your fuel is the best of all types and naturally this is why we are drawn to you, sink our teeth into you and start to drain you of all that sparkling and pure fuel.

Your honesty makes you a target to begin with, it makes you an easier target to latch onto and the reward of this pure fuel means we want to keep hold of you and keep returning to you to feed on it.

The matter does not of course end there. Your empathic sin of honesty generates further problems for you once the devaluation commences. We are dishonest. We are habitual liars, practitioners of deceit and operate through a skewed lens of fraudulent intent. When we engage in these dishonest practices it mortally offends your innate honesty with the consequence that you respond by providing yet more fuel. This offence to your honesty combined with your honesty drives you to want to make us see the lies that we so readily allow to fall from our deceitful mouths, to have us address our mendacity and recognise what we do. This only serves to bind you to us further.

The honesty you have with your self also means that you have a capacity to be introspective and the consequence of this is that you regularly self-flagellate by blaming yourself when you can find no other answer to our behaviour. The narcissistic perspective and our toxic logic, which are invariably a mystery to our victims means that you fail to understand why we do and say as we do. Your honesty causes you to look inwards and you blame yourself. This fulfils our desire to remain unaccountable and increases the weight of the burden of our engagement with you, upon you. Your honesty causes you to accept blame either where it does not lie with you or in a greater proportion that for which you are culpable.

Your honesty of dealings also prevents you often of speaking of the devaluing abuses outside of your relationship with us. At first, that may seem a contradiction, but you would feel dishonest if you spoke about them to others without informing us first of your intention to do so. You, by this stage, have learned that it is a safer course of action to suffer in silence rather than speak out to us and in turn you will not speak of what is happening to others, not until the pressure has become too great or more likely once you have been discarded by us.

The enduring love you experience for us, or more accurately, your addiction as a consequence of our infecting you, means that when those hoovers come post escape or discard, you are unable to shroud or hide how you truly feel and once more you light up like the brightest beacon. You signal to us that your love (addiction) remains and thus there is yet more fuel to gather and that you are so susceptible to our machinations to pull you back into our grasp once again, be that to extract fuel or to commence the Formal Relationship once again.

We know you are honest. It shines from you and we identify it from the way you conduct yourself and what you say when we target you at the outset. Not only is the identification of this trait confirmation that you possess one of the many traits that we look for, it also confirms that certain actions will succeed and certain responses will take place.

It is often stated that honesty is the best policy. It is certainly a policy that we endorse. It is one of the empath’s sins and with it comes the attention, exploitation and manipulation of our kind.


27 thoughts on “Sins of the Empath : Honesty

  1. Pixie says:

    I just want to add 2 thoughts I just had. One would be (sarcasm), if a narcs lips are moving, she/he is lying. And I re-read Insatiable Learners post and I agree with her. If I understand her correctly, no matter what school, cadre, IPPS, friend, etc., it’s all about prime aims and need for fuel. Period. X

  2. Christine says:

    Honesty is the best policy. Honesty with oneself is the first step to getting free of a narcissist. That means admitting that the abuser was nothing but a parasite and you were fooled. Once you have that, you will be protected from hoovering. This is true in personal relationships and with all cults and con artists.

    You can’t love anyone unless you love yourself, you can’t protect anyone unless you protect yourself, and you can never be honest until you are honest with yourself. That is the secret. It is not a sin; it is our biggest strength.

  3. DebbieWolf says:

    It is very upsetting.

    1. DebbieWolf says:

      Our honesty ensures “certain actions will succeed and certain responses will take place”

      When I was growing up my mother said to me always tell the truth and don’t lie..
      if you lie I will know and then there will be trouble. if you tell the truth even if you think it is bad you won’t be in as much trouble because you were honest about it.

      Man. I remember getting my heartbroken for the first time at the age of 16… I just could not take it on board that my boyfriend had lied and cheated.
      I don’t know if he was a narcissist or not he was 18.. but I just could not believe the lies it was the lies I couldn’t take in.

      Honest through and through and man have I ever suffered for being straight talking. nevertheless I’m not changing now I’ve paid too higher price.

      I’ll keep my virtue thank you very much… but at least I know I have to protect it.
      I have to understand there are different mindsets and accept that certain influences are only too ready to corrupt my way of being.

      Fuel is power to the narcissist, knowledge is power to the empath.
      As HG points out.. this information weaponises.

      I like to use a shield firstly..weapons later if necessary!! (i.e.counter measures)
      Thors hammer…Iron Mans suit..haha.

      Joking aside though it really is quite upsetting.

      “Cant we all just get along”.. sounds a comical thing to say.. but I wish it was possible with all of my heart…urrr there it is again…another sin…hope.

      Some days I feel so pissed off..angry and sad, disappointed with some people. Thats life.

      At least various answers are here in these articles… the sin of being a Truth Seeker is at least made lighter here.
      the weight of various mysteries and conundrums can be ditched.
      Being a Truth Seeker really is very hard.
      not having answers not understanding not being able to work it out means not being able to fix it… that has been the hardest thing for me in life.

      Easier now. And it is this man..this terrible wonderful man..HG who cleared the path ahead.

      It’s hard carrying various traits and virtues when they seem to draw horrible opposition… but I’ll be damned if I will put them down.

      As Nelson Mandela said in so many words: we shouldn’t have to be less to make others feel more than they really are. To make them feel better.

      I don’t know….honestly, some days, and we all have them, there is nothing to do but sigh.

      It’ll pass though.
      I trust myself.

  4. abrokenwing says:

    Yeah, I have recently paid ( and still paying) a very high price for my honesty. Unfortunately.

  5. wounded says:

    It is an interesting twist of fate, perhaps, that the very thing that allowed me to be ensnared was also the thing that allowed me to be free. I did not until now realize just how on display my emotions actually were and while I am not a geyser of emotion by an stretch there is quite a bit beneath the surface.

    It was my truth seeking and tendency for self-introspection and reflection that brought me here, allowed me to see that I was not self victimizing but was in fact a victim. It has also allowed me to realize that I will not take the blame for being victimized. Not ever again.

    I will hold myself accountable for not trusting my gut and setting boundaries. But the rest? That sits firmly on the shoulders of the one who wrought havoc in my life. I don’t need the last word on this one. After all, actions speak louder than words.

    1. Pixie says:

      I’ve been reflecting all afternoon.

      Today, I got hoovered by a friend. Male friend just dropped over ‘out of the blue.’ He’s been in Mexico for two years–beach bum.When he ghosted me two years ago I didn’t care cuz I wasn’t into him and just liked being a friend.

      He claims he wanted my HONEST opinion on what he should do next in his life. No questions about what I’ve been doing.

      We spent all day together today. Nice, but the entire day I had a sick feeling. Gut feeling. It’s the first time I really listened to it. Sounded like a fire alarm.

      I’m proud of myself yet scared to death. I’m waiting for him to text me if he’s coming over tonight. I don’t want to see him again. I’ve changed. I could either be paranoid or actually coming to awareness of even more, past and present, narcs in my life. I believe its the latter.

      Almost every word that came out of his mouth was out of all HG’s playbooks. I drove so he could text whomever (victim he is probably with right now) he was busy texting.

      I pray he doesn’t text me. I think he’s mid-range. He did not know me. I have evidence today that I have real progress.

      Thanks Ladies for being honest. I’ve learned so much from u, oh, yeah and u too HG.

      1. DebbieWolf says:

        Helllo Pixie

        Just block the number. No need to pray he doesnt text. I think you may have pre guilt.. in other words knowing you will feel guilty if you do block.

        But Pixie there is no need to feel guilty and if he comes don’t answer the door or if you must just make it up and say that you are busy and you must go out.

        Remember everything .. he did Ghost you in the first place don’t give him the Triumph of just swanning in whenever he pleases.

        Do you know how much self respect you give yourself if you just block him and go through pushing the Guilt down.

        There’s nothing wrong with an old friend looking up an old friend but friends don’t ghost you in the beginning remember.

        You don’t have to turn off your pleasant nature if that’s too much of course you don’t and be unpleasant, you don’t have to do any of that, you just have to opt out.

        “Unsubscribe him from the channe”l which is your life going forward.

        It doesn’t have to be unpleasantly done, it just has to be done.

        You don’t need friends who use you as a taxi service while they texted everybody else trust me I’ve been there with a girlfriend once… Supposed to be a mate of mine… that kind of person calls you up when they’re at a loose end and expects you to do favours don’t set yourself up because you’ll be in a worse position having to say no to this that or the other later…

        And although you felt sick isn’t it a good feeling when all the things you’ve learned kick in and you feel as though your eyes are open properly to someone’s behaviour..

        Well done Pixie x

        1. MB says:

          DebbieWolf “unsubscribe”. I love it. We don’t feel guilty about that. Great analogy!

          1. DebbieWolf says:

            Thanks MB👍

      2. Pixie says:

        Hey Debbie. Narc friend never texted last night. He called me this morning. I let call go to voicemail. Then I got a text ‘call me.’

        Before I read ur logical advice, I texted him I’m busy.

        Then I read ur spot on advice. I do have guilt. Unless I’m in supernova mode, I find it extremely difficult to be unkind to anyone. Especially since Kevin has never hurt me. Lousy friend though. But I always knew he was what I would describe as a free agent. I liked that about him.

        He wants my advice because on the outside I look like I’ve ‘got my shit together.’ What no one knows is I’m trembling right now. I know I should block him, but he will come over to my house–we all know how narcs don’t understand simple hints.

        What I saw yesterday was a lost, anxious, scared young man. How do you tell someone, this is ur life. You’re traveling the world, leaving town on a whim, ghosting, being a gigalo is what ur life will ever be. It makes me sad.

        But, he did kiss me twice on the lips (no tongue) yesterday and he has never kissed me before except cheek.

        I love ur honesty, Debbie. I ‘heard’ every word. X

        1. DebbieWolf says:

          Hello Pixie.

          I understand completely. It is very hard especially as the guy has never hurt you as such. Though, it is hurtful if someone just ghosts you!.we tend to overlook what may appear to be “small” hurts. Perhaps not giving credence to them after comparing them to what we see as worse things we may read of.

          Why would a real friend ghost.
          Well ..because at the time it suited ,”them”.
          This is a crucial thing to see. What suits them and takes precedence once can happen twice and again.

          Think of the people who are shall we say ok with us in life, do they ghost us?

          There are people who do certain things and others dont. The key is knowing that when someone does something once then that is who they are. If it isnt then they wouldnt do that thing ever in the first place.

          You say he seemed lost.
          The lost look for a port in a storm.
          Particularly a safe well organised port (one that has its shit together)

          Of course when we see someone as benign and who has been benign generally it does feel wrong not to be there for that person. It definitely does.

          There are a couple of things to bear in mind.. He may find safe harbour in you for a short while until he is fed and watered, in other words gathered a little strength and comfort if he is feeling lost.. when he has what he needs being the type he sounds to be, albeitl pleasant enough, it is possible, if not likely, that he will ghost again. Remember he does what suits him.
          There’s nothing wrong with doing what suits you but it is the fact that he never was upfront with you he just disappeared.. it shows a lack of respect for your feelings.

          Nobody says he has to stay around or that he owes you anything; n life.. but if he’s a true friend and he has to go off on his own somewhere he should have said goodbye and said that’s what he was doing.
          Somebody real and genuine who cares about you as a friend dont do that ..if they have to go away they will tell you.

          Lost people look for a comfort blanket.
          You don’t have to be unpleasant. if that is going against your nature and makes you uncomfortable unless you’re in Supernova then I totally understand that and I get it.

          You can be kindly unavailable, busy, just literally not available, not be completely at his mercy. I wouldn’t let him take comfort kisses let him know that you don’t see him that way. Pull back. Back away pleasantly but firmly. if he’s a normal person then he will understand that and respond accordingly. If he starts pushing and really showing narcissistic traits then you can bring the hammer down in the way that HG teaches.

          With a complete lack of emotion and be completely non-responsive… when he leaves that day then you become absolutely unavailable.

          Because if he shows more narcissism you will get used until he has his fill.. or worse, be giving him the strength and confidence to go and use whatever he thinks he’s gained to go and get with someone else..

          If it turns out that he is not a narcissist then he’s being a jerk when he ghosted you and showed extremely bad form just turning up like it was a free for all to a nice person he would see as a guaranteed welcome. It’s just selfishness hidden behind some smiles and relative pleasantness.

          Remember Helen of Troy.
          Remember the Trojan horse.
          The gift that keeps on giving alright.. all of the wrong things.

          Dont be uncomfortable with anything you do. Keep it simple if you you truly don’t want anything to do with him.
          Opt out gently. If he doesn’t take it..
          Opt out hard. Use his refusal if so as an irritation..use the irritation as your own fuel because he shouldn’t be refusing to back off.
          Use that instead of full on supernova.. irritation is a brilliant Motivator..

          You will know what to do I have no doubt about it. You are caring and kind and so any boundary you set should not be breached, and if it is..
          It’s time for the Hammer…lol.
          Thor like…!

          if it turns out that you do want something to do with him than that of course is your business but if it is that you do not want anything to do with him but you’re uncomfortable with telling him to just leave you alone then I would go by the above.

          I am definitely no expert on these things absolutely not but I feel that would be the right way to go if it was me..
          Think of it as just a little recipe and you can add your own ingredients..haha xx

  6. HappyTimesAhead says:

    Hmmm….. openly admit to CEN, empath and codependent. All made me vulnerable to narcville. I have worked on and hopefully come to terms with CEN, empathy too ingrained to change, and realise late in the game that I need to work on my codependency. It was the CEN that shaped the latter. I would have thought being CEN would have made me more distrustful, but empath and co won out and overruled any sense of self and healthy boundaries; hence the emotional pull of narcville still lingers. Must do better. HG – would CEN send some down the narc route, yet send some down the empath codependent route instead? If so, why? And, can empathy and codependency later develop as adults into narcissism as a self protective mode?

    1. Pixie says:

      Wow Debbie. I ‘met’ you right on time. I’m playing this out with Kevin. I positively, absolutely do not want him in my life in no way. I was correct, when I didn’t immediately answer his text he came to my house unannounced, uninvited. I didn’t answer the door. This was after I texted him I was busy.

      he’s a narc, but let’s give him the benefit of the doubt–say he’s just an extremely self- absorbed, self-centered, arrogant prick becuz I don’t have a PhD, just getting my Master’s in Narcdom, so I can’t make a definitive diagnosis, but if it looks like a narc, smells like a narc, TALKS and acts like a narc . . . Kevin is a blast from my past. That he should re-enter my space at this time is a lesson in how I conduct myself in the future.

      I see him now for who he really is. No friend. I don’t kiss my male friends on the lips. Its a small thing, but men need my permission to kiss or touch me. I’m not frigid, I just find it rude. If he had asked I would have said no. We’re just friends.

      He’s starved for fuel. I have a suspicion the other women and men he’s texting aren’t responding. Now I’m not responding. He called me last night and I blew him off for the weekend. My instinct is full boar. He is definitely a con. He obsessively texted me last night and I did not respond. He ended his text by asking me to go to Mexico with him. How ideallic it would be.

      I am sick to my stomach but I dodged a bullet. He gets blocked tomorrow as he’s driving to Sin City to see his Mommy. X

      1. DebbieWolf says:

        Hey Pixie
        …and All of You🌹

        Fancy asking you to go to Mexico…upping the ante… he’s coming up against resistance so he ups the ante.


        Oh Pixie,
        isn’t it unfair when all we want to do is love?
        This thing called love..

        It is an honour to have the love of someone. Real Love.

        The kind of love that I want to give is to like someone immensely, to respect them, to accept them for who they are, to understand them, to admire, to want them, to desire them, to care for them, to always be there for them, to always have their back. To nurture them, protect them, desire them, comfort them, make them laugh, smile, give them joy and help them feel peace, to be gentle and kind with them, but also fiery and robust to stand up for my own needs when need be, to put them first while still respecting my own needs and so much more as in truely loving them deeply.
        .. I ask myself what is wrong with that!?!

        We deserve to have that love in return. Real love.

        When I think of all the people here who have this kind of love and offer it, give it..

        It breaks my heart to think of all the people we have come up against who have abused this love.

        I wouldn’t dare show such dishonor towards somebody who was full of all these wonderful attributes and caring natures that I admire so much.

        Imagine somebody that you admire who is so sweet and decent and then imagine somebody treating that person without any respect across a spectrum.. from mild to severe it is just disgusting.

        Imagine how that would make you feel watching the lovely person go through what they do not deserve.

        See yourself as that lovely person..

        I just would not dare treat somebody the way these abusive people treat loving people.

        I find it heartbreaking…
        as Clarece said in a different post how some of us have to go through the suffering and burden of heartbreak and pain alone. How some of us don’t have the benefit of someone to turn to.

        I think it’s appalling the way such love is cruelly torn up and the very people who deserve to be with somebody that cares end going through it on their own.

        Oh we can gain strength we can learn..we can know that we must love ourselves that we don’t need someone else. that we are complete as one individual and if we should meet someone else that is a bonus not a necessity. (yes..yes..we know!)

        There are many here who are already like that. Me too.

        However, I still want to give my love wholeheartedly.

        I still want the honour of giving my love completely to someone who will not abuse it in anyway.
        As most of us do I would imagine.

        I want and need to give love and I do. It’s just a question of being careful of the damned mirror.

        I don’t want a mirror.
        ” I want to feel real love…” like Robbie Williams sings about… because “I’ve got too much life running through my veins going to waste”.

        Though I don’t waste my love really etc ..on my rescue animals or on anyone I encounter who needs compassion and care…
        (but you know what I mean as in regards having a partner.)

        I am in good company with some outstanding people here.
        People who are authentic.
        I really appreciate you all.

        I want you to know how much your good energy means when it can be felt and picked up.
        In the damned barren wasteland of abuse and fake love I don’t want to sound corny by saying it truly is an honour to know you exist and to thank you all for the care, compassion, understanding and love that you do bring here.

        I feel it and I can see you.

        I know you understand what I mean by that. And it is so important for you to be seen.

        Thank you all for your loving empathic selves. For sharing who you are.
        And arn’t you beautiful?!
        Yes. You are.

        I send my love and wish for you all to encounter real love and care in this world too.

        Lets keep going forward, onwards we go.

        Sincerely, Debbie xxx.

  7. Stéphanie says:

    This concept takes a while to truly understand – as it can be so inherent that it is hard to recognise. Does this mean, then, that in all narcissists’ relations, be it with primary, secondary, or tertiary sources, the empath’s honesty is exploited and everything the narcissts says is a lie – or is it different depending on the fuel source and relation to it?

    1. Insatiable Learner says:

      Stephanie, I think regardless of the nature of the source, whether a narc lies or not depends on which one (a lie or truth) he/ she believes will serve him/ her best in a given situation with respect to this particular source in terms of securing the prime aims (fuel, character traits, residual benefits). HG, please correct me if I am wrong.

    2. Pixie says:

      Hey Stephanie. It is hard for me to recognize also becuz when I meet anyone, I lead with the character traits that make me an empath. I believe people when the tell me anything. I trust they are not lying. Now I’m slowly recovering where I listen closely what kind of questions they ask me about me. What I use to believe is changing. Caution is my new best friend.

      I’d like the answer to ur question also. X

  8. Blank says:

    In today’s world, honesty gets you nowhere, it certainly doesn’t give you a job. I want to become a narc, free of conscience and guilt.

  9. Nina says:

    Where have you been my whole life, HG??!! Thank you for explaining it so well. I’ve been called naive too many times to count. Now I’m beginning to understand how that quality can be exploited. Narcs really do pick up on it, it is quite unbelievable how fast and easily they can sense it.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You are welcome.

  10. Survivor of a Narcissist says:

    Very enlightening and at the same time very familiar.

    1. NarcAngel says:

      The question to ask yourself is: Why given his absence and history of disappearing did I let him kiss me on the lips? Twice. Scared, lost, anxious “friends” looking for advice, generally dont show up and start kissing you. People testing your boundaries with plans to trample them and looking for a place to crash do. I would take Debbie’s advice and unsubscribe. You dont have to be concerned about appearing unkind. He is not concerned about taking advantage of you.

      1. DebbieWolf says:


        👍 Absolutely. Boundary testing.

      2. K says:

        Oh no…a kiss with no tongue means Pixie is somewhere in the murky waters between NISS and IPSS.

      3. Pixie says:

        I’m learning. All responses from all of u r correct. He kissed me. I didn’t kiss him. Cold, unmoving lips. It must have felt like kissing a dead fish lol. I was unresponsive. His second kiss was more deliberate and caught me off guard as we were sitting next to each other and I thought he was leaning over to whisper sweet NOTHINGS in my ear lol.

        I am taking Debbie’s advice. Unsubscribing Kevin. But I am waiting until he leaves tomorrow to see Mommy becuz I’m not at a point in my recovery to be unkind to anyone who hasn’t been unkind to me YET. He’s my teacher right now. I see clear through his boundary testing. X

  11. Ooshbitchbegoosh says:


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