Malign Hoover Campaign


For the forty-second day in a row you arrive at work and find that there is an offensive voicemail waiting for you.

“You left without paying and you will soon do so you fucking bitch. Nobody leaves without paying. Understand?”

You replace the handset and feel the sick sensation rising inside you again. Why does this keep happening. You do not recognise the voice, in fact is sounds somehow synthesised or distorted, no doubt to mask who it is. Notwithstanding this, you know where this message came from. All forty-two messages will be from the same source. The messages are always left on your work voicemail, never anywhere else. They are left at different times, always different times but at some point between 9pm and 6am, accordingly you are never at your desk when the message comes in. You would deactivate your voicemail but you need it and of course I know this. That is why the messages are always left there. You have changed your work telephone number three times and you really do not want to ask the infrastructure team to have to do it again. You saw the eye-rolling last time. It is not as if they cannot believe you, you have played the messages to them but you know what they are thinking.

“Deal with it, it is just some crank who will tire of it soon enough.”

Well six weeks have passed and there is no sign of tiring, no a sniff of fatigue. The messages are as savage and as vitriolic as usual. You changed the number but still the messages got through. Someone here is obviously telling me about the changes. Who could it be? Someone in the infrastructure team? Your secretary? Another colleague? So many potential suspects but then you always did wonder why I took such an interest in meeting so many people from where you worked. So many people to choose from, to recruit, to ensure one or more has become a lieutenant and ready to assist me in my work. It could anybody out of twenty people and you cannot go around accusing them without some concrete evidence. You can imagine the reaction if you did this and also the repercussions with human resources. This is another fact that we know and wish to exploit.

You tried to ignore the messages but after fourteen days of it, with the messages making threats about retribution and revenge you eventually confronted us. We pleaded innocence and told you that we would not do something like that. We looked shocked and concerned but then we would since you took a witness with you Still we enjoyed the fuel from you turning up at our door. We tried to get you to come in so we could discuss it further but you must have been alerted to the whine of the hoover as you stood firm. There is time yet. There is always time. We know that your defences can be breached. You just showed us this to be the case and therefore we will keep pressing, probing and looking for that opportune moment.

The messages tend to stick to a theme of punishing you and that is what makes you think it is me. You hoped your pleas on the fourteenth day went heeded, that even though we had denied it, you were on to us. The next morning you saw the red light flashing on your ‘phone indicating that you had a voicemail message from overnight. You toyed with getting someone else to listen but then it might be something else so you dialled the code and listened.

“Think you can stop the punishment do you? Never. You have sinned and you must atone.”

You sat down and began to cry as the words, each one spat out in a staccato style had their effect. You begged for a truce. Why would we agree to that when we know the effect that our words will be having on you. We may not be able to see you as you receive each one, every morning, but we know you well enough. We know you will be angered and then shocked and nervous, dreading accessing your voicemail box. We need not see your reaction. It is enough for us to know how you will be reacting and thus we achieve our aim of garnering fuel from you.

By the twenty-third day you had involved infrastructure in trying to trace where the call was coming from but they drew a blank. By the thirty-seventh day you had opted to call in her majesty’s finest to solve the problem. You had saved all the messages and handed over the audio file of this disembodied voice. You somehow managed to persuade the police to visit me and I was of course most co-operative and charming. I let them look through my call list on my mobile phone which had no evidence on it. I even produced evidence that demonstrated that I could not have made those calls even if I had wanted to on several of the nights in question and that convinced them that they were barking up the wrong tree. Of course they were, you do me a dis-service if you think I would get my hands dirty with this particular campaign. I have others to do this for me, to avoid detection and still I get to gather the fuel as I picture your frightened and shocked reaction as I still manage to penetrate your attempts to evade me.

You are wondering when it will end. Surely I will not keep this up forever? Surely I will move on to someone else and be preoccupied with them? I have someone else and they are far better than you but you still deserved to be tormented and tortured for your treachery and your deceit. You deserve to be punished. You think it must end soon. I know it won’t. Not while you continue to give me what I want. In addition, I know I have the ace up my sleeve that I can use the ending of this campaign as a way to bring you back into the fold. If you give you and me another chance, this can all stop can’t it? Make it go away by just accepting my terms and you can bring this campaign to an end. It is not time for that yet however. I feel no need to bring you back as my primary source. I have one in place, no thanks to your sudden treachery. No, there is much mileage in this malign hoovering for some time yet. This will not be ending soon.

13 thoughts on “Malign Hoover Campaign

  1. wounded says:

    How do get a minion to do that? I mean, I can see minions doing things that might seem like a joke or a prank but to leaving nasty voice distorted messages for weeks?

    The narc employed an LT. to play a prank on an employee that caused the kid to break down and cry but the LT. just walked around and found fault with this kids job over an eight hour period.

    So how would someone go about pulling off a campaign of this magnitude?

  2. Leslie says:

    It does finally stop. I have endured my way through it. I never caved in.

    I am free.

    You are still trapped in yourself.

  3. Kathy Mor says:

    So I just stared at him for a second and told him that I needed to say something but I knew he wouldn’t believe me.
    He raised his eyebrows and asked me what is it.
    I said… look. You need to trust me on this one. I KNOW what I am talking about.
    I think you need to schedule a visit with your doctor.
    His eyebrows moved up and an air of concern settled in his expression. He asked me why.

    I said… look. I know you have 50 good excuses to approach me like this, like we are a couple and had a disagreement last night and now you are trying to make it up for it. But here is the reality: last time I saw you was 7 years ago walking around with another woman as you let me waiting at home. I caught you and I booted you out of my life. Shhhhh! That’s not your turn to talk. It is mine. You need to listen to me.

    Normal people don’t act like you do. They just don’t. If a normal guy cheated and got caught, he will get embarks day he will be very careful about approaching the wounded part. by your approach right now, I can tell that your mental issue is getting worse. You sound like a demented person. You are acting like a demented old man by approaching me like that. NORMAL people don’t do things like that. They just don’t. Take my word for it.
    Your dad has dementia and you may be heading that way. You need to go see and PCP.
    I mean it. Do you understand it?
    It is not normal. You are not normal. You had 3 divorces. You act really demented. I am speaking for your own good. Dementia is a sneak bitch. It sneaks st you and when you least expect you will find yourself in Ohio not knowing how you go there. Understand?
    You aren’t normal. Trust me. Totally trust me. And no, don’t contact me. I will press charges. Trust me on that one too.

    I walked out of that fair so fast that I did my cardio for the day! His face was this blank black hole swirling in concern… point made. One down, 4 to go.

  4. Kathy Mor says:

    I am walking in this art fair when suddenly somebody moves in by my side and asks me what I am doing there.
    I turned and guess who I was standing there. The Almighty narc 1. That bold blond head with those sarcastic blue eyes. “Babygirl, did the kitty eat your tongue? What are you doing ALONE here?”
    My face went blank. I felt my whole self change into this blank state and I felt the feeling of disgust creeping up. Yet, I acted like he was a mosquito buzzing by my side and simply moved away. He followed me visibly irritated. Then he gently grabbed my arm and said: “oh no, no. You have been running away from me, haven’t you? We are not doing this running away. We are going to talk.”
    You know, there are many reasons why God made men physically stronger than women and among maybe the 20 reasons one of them is: so we don’t beat the living shit out them.
    I had to consider. I could continue ignoring him of which would lead him to become nasty with me in public and embarrass me, because he was getting more and more sarcastic or I should just smash his damn gross balls and get over with it.

    1. windstorm says:

      Kathy Mor
      “You know, there are many reasons why God made men physically stronger than women and among maybe the 20 reasons one of them is: so we don’t beat the living shit out them.”

      H, ha, ha! This cracked me up! Yes! And another reason is because their physical strength has many uses maintaining a house and property, so we would feed and put up with them.

      1. Kathy Mor says:

        Oh his ex wife called me last night to ask wth I told him because he was acting frantic asking for “memory tests” after mentioning to her that he “accidentally “ met me on this fair. She was rather surprised he came to talk to me (really?). She is liar. She works in the medical field with cancer patients as a clinical psychologist in this hell hole little town. I told her what I said and she nearly fell off the chair laughing. She knows he’s a narc hence the divorce. But she is also a narc so she can care less about his “mental health”. The smearing campaign they had against each other was a show to the community. His sexual comments about her private parts were at minimum funny. Obviously to watch him panicking was the funniest thing she ever saw coming from him. Knowing the woman, she will probably give him some manipulated version of some Alzheimer’s test so he can fail so she can further cash more on his stupidity. I can care less. I reminded her that she will not cash anything if she allows him to ring my phone again or approach or even think about me because depending on the bomb he drops next time, it will be a restraining order with sexual harassment type of problem and I will make the issue very public so everyone knows what a rotten faggot he is. He is to avoid me like I am a disease…. because I am. Of that aspect she got quiet and told me to not worry. He would forget me. Good then.

        I have no patience these days…. none.

  5. Anm says:

    What does it mean, when every 6 months or so, as I am trying to discuss family affairs with the malignant narc ex who I have low contact with, he suddenly says, “you should get yourself a boyfriend, someone new, someone to abuse, because I wont take that s**t”. It comes from nowhere.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      It is provocation and the attempted assertion of superiority over you. I suspect that when you are seeking to discuss family affairs with him you are providing Challenge Fuel.

      1. Anm says:

        Yes! Everything he says is from provocation and to assert superiority. EVERYTHING I do, including breathing is challenge fuel. I started to think about it. As bizarre as this statement seems, but how consistent the cycle is, I think it is as close to a benign hoover as him and I can get. He is devaluing his current IPPS, and when I am challenging him at this point, his fuel levels are flexuating. Therefore, he is PROJECTING, and really saying “I should get a new partner, someone new, someone to abuse, because I cant take this sh**.”

    2. evoking dahlias says:

      I think when they blurt things out of nowhere, they project what they think we are thinking. He is basically telling you what he thinks you think. He thinks, in his all present sense of inferiority and a state of paranoia, that this is what is actually on your mind. They always worry we are figuring them out at any moment, that their abuse is taking its toll and you are about to leave.
      So by saying it out loud to you, he baits you to react and either confirm that this is what you’re thinking, or relieve his paranoia. Our reaction to an out of nowhere provocation gives him that information about the state of your relationship.
      Ive had this happen constantly, and he was always right about his “worries”.

      1. Anm says:

        Projection is what I realized after a while. I do not react anymore. I really dont. But I think he does try to read me, therefore projecting his sick agenda on me

  6. WriteItOut says:

    Ex affair partner kept this malign bullshit up for over two years, even though no contact was never breached.

    The stupid thing is that I know she’s miserable. She can’t hide her displeasure when I’m around, to see me laughing and talking with friends after she insisted to me that “You’ll never fit in!”, thinking she had enough power to turn people against me. It’s all backfired on her, from the beginning of her malicious campaign to now. I’m the badass bitch who took back her territory, and she’s the crazed hanger-on who doesn’t know when to stop.

    So I have to wonder where the fun is in that, for her.

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