You’d Better


What goes through the mind of the Lesser Narcissist when he has decided that he must respond with regards to some transgressor, some traitor, some disloyal appliance which has affronted him in some way?  What are his thoughts as he bears down on the one who now represents everything that he despises? Whether they have escaped him, exposed him, challenged him or some other capital crime against the Lesser Narc Empire, what is his response? This is a glimpse inside to understand what is his mind-set.

You’d better fucking get in line you bitch because you’ve messed with the wrong marine. You’d better get your backside back where it belongs and do as you are told. You’d better shut your hole, open your legs and give me what is my right. You’d better keep your mouth shut otherwise I will shut it for you. You’d better not go crying to your brothers or I will beat the shit out of them too. You’d better get back to our home and you’d better be there by the time I get back, do you hear me? You’d better listen to me and you’d better listen good, I own you, you are mine and if you so much as think of ratting on me, I will make your life not worth living.

You’d better understand that I wear the trousers around here and the sooner you get used to that, then the easier it is going to be. You’d better not start letting your mouth flap to people and telling lies about me, you know what happened last time you did that. You’d better do as you are told because it is for your own good, yeah? You’d better get back here and do it straight away, do you hear me? You’d better have a good excuse for what you’ve done, I am sick of you not doing what I want. You’d better learn your place missy.

You’d better get this house tidied. You’d better have my dinner ready. You’d better have some money for me for my beers. You’d better not have eaten my do-nuts. You’d better get that damn child of yours to shut up so I can watch the game in peace. You’d better dress pretty for me. You’d better stop dressing like a whore. You’d better stop talking to the neighbour ‘cos I know what’s going on, I’m not stupid.

You’d better stop with those long words you use, thinking you are all clever and mighty. You’d better forget any idea of going back to school, you belong here with me. You’d better remember whose side you are on. You’d better remember who looks after you. You’d better remember that if it was not for me, you’d still be living in that shit hole with no money. You’d better not be taking the piss out of me. You’d better not call me stupid. You’d better not treat me like a fool. You’d better stop with those ideas, you won’t be anything. You’d better stop trying to better yourself. You’d better stay with me.

You’d better stay away from her, she is trouble I tell you. You’d better tell your mother to shut her mouth, who does she think she is talking to me like that? You’d better give it me or I will just take it anyway. You’d better stop making things up. You’d better leave me alone, can’t you see I am tired. You’d better stop your moaning, I will get a job when I want to. You’d better stop your nagging or I will make you stop. You’d better stop going about your needs, I am sick of you being selfish.

You’d better give me a baby soon or I am finding someone who will. You’d better get rid of it because I sure as hell don’t want no kid. You’d better go to the clinic. You’d better be in when I get home or there will be hell to pay. You’d better have it fixed or else. You’d better stay out of my way because I am this far from beating you down. You’d better stop taking his side. You’d better believe me when I tell you I didn’t do nothing.

You’d better not call the cops. You’d better not say anything. You’d better tell them the truth and that you made a mistake. You’d better tell them I was here all night. You’d better not touch my phone. You’d better let me see your ‘phone. You’d better not complain. You’d better not moan. You’d better give it to me or I will just do it anyway. You’d better get a new one then. You’d better pass me a beer. You’d better find me some money. You’d better get off my case. You’d better clean this place, it’s a shit hole. You’d better get off your fat ass and do some work.

You’d better run back home or I will come and drag you back. You’d better tell your father to keep his nose out or I will break it. You’d better answer me. You’d better pick up. You’d better open this fucking door or I swear I will kick it down. You’d better not be seeing nobody else. You’d better be in by ten. You’d better not be flirting with him or I will kill you both. You’d better stop going out. You’d better stay in. You’d better do what I want. You’d better know what I mean. You’d better not make me repeat myself.

You’d better wipe it up and get on with it. You’d better pretend everything is alright. You’d better make sure he is gone when I get home from the yard. You’d better not have those kids there. You’d better ring your mom and tell her you are fine. You’d better get used to it because that’s the way it is. You’d better enjoy yourself. You’d better smile. You’d better stop that crying. You’d better show you like it. You’d better show me that you care. You’d better do it right this time. You’d better get on with it.

You’d better start showing me some respect. You’d better realise that I am the boss. You’d better start earning your keep. You’d better stop complaining. You’d better shit or get off the pot. You’d better show me that you love me. You’d better stop being jealous. You’d better realise they’re my friends. You’d better stop being such a pain in the ass. You’d better stop trying to be better than you are. You’d better remember where you come from. You’d better get with the programme. You’d better do it my way or get the fuck out. You’d better stop this. You’d better quit messing around. You’d better suck it and suck it good. You’d better have something I like to eat. You’d better not have made any of that foreign rubbish. You’d better have paid the bills. You’d better not have used my car. You’d better not have let her in. You’d better not have spoken against me.

You’d better let me do it or I will find someone who will. You’d better put out for me. You’d better take it and not cry. You’d better quit asking. You’d better know what I meant. You’d better stop trying to confuse me. You’d better stop blaming me when it’s your fault. You’d better get out of my way. You’d better see that you do. You’d better tell him what’s going to happen if he keeps doing that. You’d better be a good mother. You’d better start taking better care of me. You’d better smile.

You’d better get me something for this headache. You’d better quit your backchat. You’d better make this pain go away. You’d better sort this mess out. You’d better take the day off work to look after me. You’d better get your mom to have those damn kids. You’d better give me some peace. You’d better stay home and help me. You’d better go and find someone who can help. You’d better get it fixed. You’d better deal with it. You’d better sort it out. You’d better not have done. You’d better not have fucked it up.

You’d better realise I can do what I want. You’d better know you can’t stop me. You’d better understand I call the shots round here. You’d better do what’s right or else. You’d better know who is the boss.

You’d better stop being a bitch. You’d better keep your legs shut. You’d better be a man. You’d better stop being a pussy. You’d better be there. You’d better be here. You’d better be nowhere I can find you.

You’d better make things good again. You’d better be waiting for me. You’d better not be going to your parents. You’d better not be telling tales about me. You’d better not be ringing the police. You’d better not be grassing me up to them. You’d better get back home right away if you know what’s right for you.

You’d better do what I fucking well want.

You’d better shut the fuck up. Now.

You’d better.

85 thoughts on “You’d Better

  1. Nika says:

    I know it might seem strange, but I have never been to a bar in my whole life. But, there are many places, as well, that I have never been.

    1. windstorm says:

      Ah! But I bet there are many places you have been that many people haven’t been.

      1. Nika says:


        Thank you! It is true!


  2. Bubbles🍾 says:

    Dear 2SF,
    Oops … sorry I was too slow … I didn’t see your comment
    Gotta be quick here … I’m competing with faster cleverer minds
    Next time perhaps … 🤣
    Luv Bubbles xx 🍾🤶🏻🌲

    1. 2SF says:

      Haha Bubbles 😊, it’s no competition, just two souls, 1 thought 😘

      1. Bubbles🍾 says:

        Dear 2SF
        Thanks beautiful ..great minds think alike 2SF 👩‍🎓
        Yes… you’re my “soul mate” use emojis just like me 😍…much to Mr Tudors disgust ..although …he’s now using profile piccies (definitely not an “English” suntan … 🤣 and delicate writers hands🤚🏻)
        Luv Bubbles xx 🍾🤶🏻🌲😘

        1. 2SF says:

          Bubbles, you should not believe everything HG says.. he looooves emojis. It’ just not cool to say so and wouldn’t suit his cool image 😎.
          Secretly he’s our soulmate too 😋

          1. HG Tudor says:

            You can fuck that sky high!

          2. 2SF says:

            Is that an invitation? (sorry, I’m not English 😜)

      2. Bubbles🍾 says:

        Hey 2SF,
        I see Mr Tudor is warming into his Xmas cheer …l wonder what he’s plotting
        Luv Bubbles xx 😘

        1. 2SF says:

          Bubbles, if it wasn’t for his politeness on this blog, he would’ve straight out yelled 🗣 “F- you”, chopped me to pieces and make me burn in his Christmas fire basket 😲☠.
          I better lay low now..

  3. W says:

    This never gets old.
    The pic makes me laugh every time I come across it.

  4. Lizbeth says:

    Mine said to me. You better shape up!! Lol

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Cos I need a man?

      1. MB says:

        A ‘Grease’ reference from the 70’s!

        1. HG Tudor says:

          That song gets played prior to the 10 to 2 zoo everywhere MB!

          1. MB says:

            I feel safe placing you at 44. That’s my final answer.

          2. HG Tudor says:

            To the step!

          3. MB says:

            It’s ok HG. I spent much of early childhood with my nose in the corner. My breath condensing on my face like it does in a cheap, rubber band Halloween mask. Ha ha. I was a sassy little girl.

          4. freedgypsysoul says:

            what’s his references / preferences to 80’s music? 44 would put him early 90s for finishing high school (using North American standards) thus he would have formed musical preferences based on late 80s. I see Depeche Mode’s song Enjoy the Silence was released January 16, 1990. Hmmmm, I’m going to throw my vote in with 44 to 45 a well (depending on time of year his birthday is). I think you’re on to something here for his age. 🙂

          5. MB says:

            Gypsy, 44 is close. Naughty step be damned!

            HG has confirmed his membership to Gen X which places him 39-53.
            He has said he’s an 80’s baby which puts him on the lower end of Gen X.
            He has also confirmed that he is not yet 50.
            He has stated that Clarece will be 50 before him.
            The picture of her flared, plaid pants this week places her at 4 years old in 1974 which makes her around 48 so he is younger than that.
            There was no internet when he was in high school. Let’s assume he graduated high school at 17 in May 1991. (Internet went live Aug 1991)

            He has been steadfast in his proclamation of always being truthful in this forum. He has also stated that there are enough clues throughout his books and the blog to determine his age.

            (His birthday is in September around the autumnal equinox btw.)

          6. freedgypsysoul says:

            Interesting collection of clues dispersed over time, within a vast amount of other crucial information. As I have just found this, I am still reading (both the current postings as well as have double backed to the beginning) so have yet to come across all this information but I am aware that everyone else has been paying attention.

            I have 2 immediate responses to this post; the first alternates between ‘damn, Virgo slash Libra potential, just my luck (thank God I’ll never be one of his targets), and it figures as my sign has always had a long standing issue with those 2 signs, the second is that he was conceived during the holiday season. When I find out a person’s birthday, I tend to back track 9 months to see if there was a ‘special event’ going on at that time. I understand this does not apply in all situations but oftentimes you’ll find a holiday, a special weekend away, a long weekend, a birthday etc. With HG, it’s the holiday season and this does not really surprise me because he’s made his posts indicating how the holiday season is all about the Narc and their penchant for drawing fuel. So, I can totally see Matrinarc making it all about her at that time of the year. Actually, I could be wrong, but what comes to mind is sex in an inappropriate place during a family gathering, you know, the disappearing act then coming back and adjusting your clothes (and smelling like sex) to draw attention to yourself.

            I’m thinking just 45 as the usual age for graduating was 18 unless you skipped any classes in school (atleast here in Canada).

          7. MB says:

            Interesting observation Gypsy. Re the time of HG’s spawning since that was just a topic of discussion.

            Due to his superior intellect, it is highly possible that HG could have skipped grades which would make him younger. I only said 17 at graduation because he wouldn’t have turned 18 until September after he had graduated.

            HG, did you skip any grades? I ask because I find that practice detrimental to a child’s social development.

          8. HG Tudor says:

            I was at university aged 11 – child prodigy you see.

          9. MB says:

            I don’t believe it. You’re too good with the ladies. Not fucked up about them like our Israeli friend.

          10. HG Tudor says:

            I am an elite, he’s a cerebral so a world of difference with regards to charm, the ability to communicate and seduce.

          11. MB says:

            Ohhhhh. Makes sense in that regard. I didn’t think about “the brain in a carbon based jar” part. However, you wouldn’t have been able to charm the 20 somethings into bed at age 11.

          12. HG Tudor says:

            Says who? Ha ha.

          13. Clarece says:

            Oh hi Doogie Howser.

          14. NarcAngel says:

            I thought of Sheldon Copper. Who I find delightful btw.

          15. Clarece says:

            Oh yes, and HG is a Sheldon fan and also a Bernadette fan if I recall correctly. I, personally, am a fan of Shamy (Sheldon and Amy). How can one not be?

          16. windstorm says:

            Ha, ha! I’m not a fan of Sheldon, but I totally love his twin sister! My favorite regular character is Amy. She has risen above her unhappy childhood and made a success of her life. She sets her sights on what she wants and uses psychology and perseverance to achieve them without hurting others in the process. Despite her frustrations, she remains a happy and caring person.

          17. freedgypsysoul says:

            What do you think would have more potential long term damage on a child; being with the same age group socially but unable to interact due to a higher intellect (you’re too smart therefore no one will accept you or be your friend) or being with the same intellectual group but unable to interact due to an age difference (you’re too young therefore no one will accept you or be your friend)?

          18. MB says:

            If I had to choose for myself or one of my own children, I would keep them with their own age group, Gypsy.

            Yes, higher intellect would make them somewhat different, but they would still have more in common with those of their own age.

            Superior intellect wouldn’t preclude them from the socialization that is necessary for “normal” functioning.

            College age young adults would interact with a child differently than they would those in their peer group even if the child had superior intellect to them. At least children would interact with them the same way they would their peers. Children being shoved into an adult world is abusive in my opinion. I don’t care how high their IQ is, they still have the life experience of a child.

          19. MB says:

            Gypsy, thank you for asking! You’re making me think and articulate. Good question. Do you have an opinion one way or the other?

          20. Clarece says:

            You cracked me up! I’m part of the calculation here? lol
            Aside from the pop culture references, for anyone who has read “Chained”, you may recall that HG spends substantial time talking about his sister and her timeline of growing up after him, always admiring him as her big brother and then when she got married, had two children and then divorced from her narcissist husband. The span of all that time and then how it correlates to where HG was in his life, absolutely puts HG middle aged in the 40’s.
            Plus, HG has had what…20 girlfriends plus a wife and ex-wife over a four year span and a divorce to settle through. This isn’t all life events that can be crammed into one decade.

          21. MB says:

            You are an important part of the calculation Clarece! Until you posted the picture, I was thinking you were younger than me so the “you’ll be 50 before me” had to be refigured. Mid 40’s is very close. One fine day, he’ll just say, “I’m 44”. Just like he said, “the football team I play for” He enjoys the guessing game!

          22. Clarece says:

            Haha! I’m so honored to be part of the HG guessing game. I’m 47 now.

          23. MB says:

            I’m 45 Clarece

          24. NarcAngel says:

            Ah 45. That was a good year. No not 1945 HG!

          25. MB says:

            NA, at 45, I feel older than I ever have.

          26. NarcAngel says:

            You ARE older than you ever have been!

          27. MB says:

            Don’t remind me NA! I guess what I meant was that I FEEL old for the first time in my life and I don’t like it.

          28. windstorm says:

            What’s a “10 to 2 zoo?”

          29. HG Tudor says:

            The last ten minutes before a nightclub closes and there is a mad scramble to find some ‘company’ for afterwards.

          30. windstorm says:

            Thanks, HG, for explaining. I’d have never guessed that! Never been in a nightclub. I thought it was probably sports related.

          31. HG Tudor says:


          32. MB says:

            Thank you for asking that Windstorm. I thought he was referring to radio programming 10 to 2. I’ve never been to a night club and can count zero on the number of times I’ve been out in public at 2 am!

          33. HG Tudor says:

            That’s the time I do my best work – to the bat cave, Robin!

          34. MB says:

            I’ve just never had a good enough reason to stay up that late. Now, a spin in the Bat Mobile with HG at 2 am…I’d stay awake for that!

          35. Clarece says:

            Best work indeed huh, after 2:00 a.m.? I don’t doubt it.

          36. windstorm says:

            I have been out in public at 2-3 am. Totally shocked me! There’s a whole counter-culture going on. The streets and stores were full. At Walmart there were people with take out food having picnics on the outdoor patio furniture that was for sale!

            I’ll never forget one conference I went to in Lexington my hotel was by a huge fountain complex in a high-end part of town. At midnight families with little children in swim suits with towels and water toys came into the park and swam and played in the fountains! I went to bed before they left.

          37. MB says:

            WS, I guess it really is true that nothing good happens after midnight!

          38. windstorm says:

            I guess that depends on your perspective. Those little kids had a lot of fun in those fountains. And there’s a different atmosphere in the wee hours of the morning- sort of unreal, with an level of excitement. Probably because if your out then you’re running off caffeine or some other drug. Lol!

          39. NarcAngel says:

            Seriously. I find people are different under cover of the night.

          40. NarcAngel says:

            Its a pathetic display of insecurity and neediness.

          41. MB says:

            Yeah NA! I was thinking that if you played your cards right, there should be no scrambling at 10 til 2. You’d already be coupled up by then.

          42. windstorm says:

            It sounds like you summed it up well. I was appalled reading HG’s definition. My first thought was why would everyone be in a mad scramble to partner up with strangers at 2 in the morning? It is pathetic and sad anyway you look at it – except from the narc perspective, I suppose. But even they surely see the pathetic aspect.

          43. Mercy says:

            NarcAngel, I was always under the impression that the 10 to 2 scrambled was easy pickings. The leftovers that didn’t secure their evening company earlier.

          44. NarcAngel says:

            Yes. Thats what makes it needy and pathetic.

          45. Clarece says:

            WS! I didn’t know what 10 to 2 meant either. I’ve never done that late night shuffle in a bar. lol

          46. windstorm says:

            Maybe it’s a Brit thing. Of course I live in a county where buying or selling alcohol is still illegal all the time, so no bars or nightclubs available. And if someone was running an illegal one, it goes without saying that there’s no mandatory cut off time! 😄

          47. Clarece says:

            I’m in a town full of college bars being two miles from one of IL’s State Universities. I’m sure there is all kind of shuffling happening at 2 am along with the campus being one big petri dish of std’s. No thanks. Haha

          48. windstorm says:

            The town I described at 2-3 am is a university town, too. But it’s not just college kids. Several factories and businesses have night and graveyard shifts. I was surprised how many people get off work at midnight, then go shopping.

          49. Clarece says:

            My cousin’s first job out of college with a broadcasting degree was with CNN /Headline News but on the graveyard shift. She would be pretty wired when she got off of work at 3 am. Kind of like we wouldn’t leave work at 4:00 pm and just go straight to bed. Lol. It makes sense they need a wind down.

          50. NarcAngel says:

            Oh they’re shopping at midnight in the bars also. Thats why they’re called meat markets. But really, if your not interesting or interested at 11 pm, you aren’t at closing time either.

      2. mollyb5 says:

        Grease lightning ….go grease lightning .

        A phrase you can add to that list ….” oh I forgot you’re a doctor / or a psycologist , miss fucking know it all !” Arrrggg aarrrrg

      3. Clarece says:

        Who can keep me satisfied…
        And we all take a moment to have a group song of “You’re the One that I Want”…

      4. 2SF says:

        🎵🎶.. and my heart is set on you 😍…

        You know what? I wish my ever so polite greater cerebral would have said these things to me. At least for once. It would have turned me on. Mr. Borehole 😒

      5. Nika says:

        Okay… even I have to admit… that one made me laugh 😆 HG…

      6. Bubbles🍾 says:

        🎼And my heart is set on you 🎼

      7. ava101 says:

        Hahahaaaa …. ;D

        Clubs over here open at 1 a.m. …. but I know, UK and Ireland … bit strange …
        Got kicked onto the street at 1 a.m. in Ireland, lights went on …

        1. HG Tudor says:

          They stay open far later now.

      8. ava101 says:

        I might pass through London soon, HG, and then we can go clubbing.

    2. mommypino says:

      the thought of everybody holding hands, with HG in the center and having a group song “Your the One that I Want” just made me happy and warm inside. ☺️

      1. MB says:

        I do wonder how it must feel to him to be desired by so many. Powerful I’m guessing?

      2. mommypino says:

        MB, hmmm probably proud or powerful like you guessed since he doesn’t do happy.

        Although I don’t really desire HG, I have a fondness of him. Similar to a fondness to a professor or boss that I like and find amusing. I am a fan of his work. Plus I think in a way being emotionally unavailable but helpful to a lot of people is fascinating.

        1. MB says:

          mommypino, he is fascinating indeed. I’m glad you’re here! I enjoy your posts. Merry Christmas to you and your sweet babies!

      3. mommypino says:

        Thank you MB! I love being here and I’m actually fond of a lot of people here too including you! Sometimes I love just reading comments while doing house chores even if I don’t join the discussion. I learn so much and I enjoy the humor. Merry Christmas to you too!!!

      4. Clarece says:

        Uh-Oh Mommypino, Careful on those warm and fuzzy compliments. HG may go start telling more children there is no such thing as Santa, like the other day. lol

        1. Mercy says:

          Clarece, yes! That was a lesson learned. Too much “love stuff” and he’ll feel the need to keep the balance haha. He should insert a love quota detector so we know when we’re at our limit for the day. Too many warm fuzzies and a kitten dies.

      5. mommypino says:

        Lol, thank you Clarece. I will make sure I don’t insert warm and fuzzy on my comments that include HG. He doesn’t do warm and fuzzy.
        I’m just a bored housewife that got carried away with the musical. I imagined all of us here at the blog doing a song and dance number like how Bolliwood movies end. It was funny in my head but the delivery sucked.

    3. Lori says:

      “Company”? Hahaha you mean Fuel 🙂

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Fuel for me, company for the normals.

      2. Lori says:


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