Every Day Spent With Me Means Another Part Of Your Heart Dies

every-dayspent-with-memeans-anotherpart-ofyour-heartdies

The heart of an empath is treasured by our kind. Whilst our own hearts are black and iced, the heart of the empath radiates with fuel. It is capable of love, desire, admiration, compassion, concern, hurt and so many other emotions which radiate from it. The empathic heart is a veritable fuel pump and as such is coveted by us. It has so much more to it than that which we have in our hearts. We are envious of this but recognise how such a heart is there to serve us and cater for our needs.

You, as an empathic individual, also have one further major difference between your heart and ours.

Yours is free.

Your heart is free to choose who it engages with. Who it falls in love with, who it wishes to show joy to, who it wishes to share its innermost desires and secrets with. It is free to show its pain to those that it chooses.

We are jealous of that freedom. Our desire to receive the bountiful fuel which is pumped from you by this delicious heart brings with it our desire to capture it and prevent you exercising this freedom any further.

Our dark hearts are bound to the venom that flows through us, to the vitriol which we spray over those around us and the adherence to hatred, envy, fury and other such dark emotions. Our hearts know no such freedom like yours. The nature of our hearts is that they are pre-ordained in how they will function.

In capturing your heart for the purposes of fuel, we also desire to capture your heart to take away this freedom that you have and the absolute method of removing this freedom is to bring about the effective ‘death’ of your heart.

We are insidious agents, proponents of the salami-slicing approach which enables us to secure our aims through a thousand deft and delicate cuts so that you never notice what is actually happening. We are no different in this modus operandi when it comes to the ‘killing’ of your heart. The death of your heart is effected through the removal of its freedom.

Each and every day we advance our cause to gain fuel and to secure the bondage of your heart, little by little, as we strip it of its freedom. Through the dazzling love-bombing we invade it, taking it piece by piece so that it belongs to us. We permeate your life through our compliments, our apparent love, our fabricated passion for you, our illusory desire as you are gradually over run and conquered. With each passing day as we unleash our charm on you, our legions of text messages, our battalions of telephone conversations and the marching foot soldiers of love, we take a piece of your heart and capture it. Thus a part of it has effectively ‘died’ since it has lost that free will.

Of course, entirely consistent with the notion of romance that you have been indoctrinated with, the capture of your heart in such a way is regarded as a wonderful thing. You are  regarding this capture as one which is healthy, respectful and you do not recognise that it has been predicated on a false premise.

Once we have you embedded your heart is ours. It has been captured. You no longer are afforded the choice of where your emotions can be directed. They must be directed towards us and us alone for the purposes of our fuel provision. The onslaught continues as having captured your heart, we then set about our scorched earth approach through devaluation as our despicable manipulations and horrid machinations are deployed against you for the purposes of maintaining the occupation of your heart and the total hegemonic control of its emotional output.

We captured the good – the love, the admiration, the compassion, the happiness, the joy and so forth.

Now we capture the bad – the pain, the hurt, the fear, the terror, the hatred and all other negative emotions.

Little by little, day by day, we invade your heart and occupy it, making it ours, commandeering its emotional resources for our own use and in so doing we strip away its ability to function in a free manner.

The removal of this freedom is how your heart dies when you are with us.

This happens on a daily basis as we slowly cause your heart to ‘die’ through our polluted control of you.

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8 thoughts on “Every Day Spent With Me Means Another Part Of Your Heart Dies”

  1. We are damned either way. With you during the golden period our hearts die, with you during devaluation/discard, our hearts die, and as we discover what you are and that we poured real love into someone who never loved us, our hearts die. Sometimes I have thought that love should be the death of you. It was the death of Jesus. It was also His resurrection and true life for all who can believe. I have not found the answer yet to how loving a narcissist can be anything other than a waste and a tragedy, but I’m looking still.

    There are two kinds of people in this world: those who think they are good, and those who know they are not. Those who think they are good, I call sleepers. Of those who know they are not good, there are two kinds: those who want to be good, and those who don’t want to be good. Those who don’t want to be good, I call the walking dead.

    Those who do want to be good look for ways to be good. Eventually they learn where goodness comes from, and then they are able to be good sometimes, but they don’t mistake themselves for being good, and they don’t mistake the world for being good, either. They are never truly at ease, and every barb kills their hearts a little bit more.

    In a world where someone like a narc can take pure innocent love and willfully destroy it and the heart that bears it for them, what matters? Whom do we ask? Sleepers don’t know, and the walking dead can only lie.

    Art is long and time is fleeting
    And our hearts, though stout and brave
    Still like muffled drums are beating
    Funeral marches to the grave

    What am I supposed to do with the love he opened the floodgates to, but that he can never actually receive?

      1. I’ve no doubt, HG, that you are 100% right about your kind. Are you sure you have it right about us, though? I mean how does one who doesn’t feel love know so well those who only feel love? How do you trust that you have us figured?

        At any rate, your great intelligence is a delightful. Your writing style is wonderful. Even when I don’t have to anymore, I’m sure I’ll still visit your blog just to partake of the deliciousness of your mind.

        1. To win any war, you must understand your opponent – inside out.

          Thank you for you compliments, they are appreciated.

      2. great point! I have realized I can canalize the energy I used to give the narc into some pretty creative and great things. yeah!!
        Seriously, it is magnificent energy for building 🙂

    1. According to your theory, it sounds like you were “a sleeper” and a narc woke you up.

      Perhaps then you should be grateful to the narc?

      For now you know what you’ve got and (as per HG’s succinct advice to you) now you know who to give it to.

      1. I was asleep, but it wasn’t the narc who woke me. He didn’t save me, either. He…revealed me. I’m still getting all of my systems rebooted to the reality that he never loved me and he never felt my love for him. HG can predict him to a great extent, however at some point it breaks down. Perhaps he only has BPD. Not that it makes a difference for me. He was still abusive and a liar and a cheat and fake. He used to wake up in the middle of the night, pull me close and whisper that he loved me before falling back asleep or initiating love making, which he usually didn’t finish because he would fall back asleep. Not sure he was ever really awake. It’s sure a mind fuck.

        For him it was fake. For me it was real. Yes there are the addictions and the learned helplessness and the habits, but all those aside, what I gave him was real. He used it as his toilet, or water closet as you Brits might say, but that doesn’t change What was given. And I can’t just give it to someone else. It doesn’t work that way for us. I have never given the same love to one that I gave to another.

        But I am keeping it to myself. I’m having a hard couple of days, but it will pass. I am GOSO and NC and staying that way.

        I know he didn’t mean to lose me; that he just meant to go secure some new sources, fuck around and quell me with the absent silent treatment before coming home. All unconsciously, of course, being that he is a lesser. But this was the last time. His abuse did hurt me, but it didn’t harm me. I am not damaged. I never thought it was about me or my fault or that I deserved it. I knew he was crazy. I was undaunted by it. Sometimes I would tell him what he wanted to hear and accept blame or apologize, but I was lying to restore reason and peace to the moment. He would rage so hard. The cheating was what drew the line for me, and the asking me to have a threesome. That’s a definite no from me. That’s just not my thing; don’t judge me. I knew I needed help breaking away, so I found help.

        Anyway…the mourning is real, too, and like all things, it too shall pass.

  2. Dear HG I haven’t consulted with you about my latest issue because I figuerd out I’m actually not dating a narcsissit for once but a codependent highly Empathic . So I feel this article relates to me as me doing this to him . I guess i’m a high functioning boderliner . I know obviously we are apples and oranges compared to each other . Still usefull regardless

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