KNOWING THE NARCISSIST — FREQUENTLY USED ACRONYMS
(This is now in the menu bar)
Narcissist Schools Narcissist Cadres
THE LESSER NARCISSIST
LLN Lower Lesser Narcissist S Somatic
MLN Middle Lesser Narcissist C Cerebral
ULN Upper Lesser Narcissist V Victim
E Elite (Somatic/Cerebral)
THE MIDRANGE NARCISSIST
LMRN Lower Mid-Range Narcissist
MMRN Middle Mid-Range Narcissist
UMRN Upper Mid-Range Narcissist
Example of Combined School and Cadre:
EMMRN = Elite Middle Mid-Range Narcissist (note some cadres apply to all schools, others do not)
THE GREATER NARCISSIST
LGN Lower Greater Narcissist
MGN Middle Greater Narcissist
UGN Upper Greater Narcissist
THE ULTRA NARCISSIST
UN Ultra Narcissist
Empath Schools Empath Cadres
C Contagion Empath C Carrier
CoD Co-Dependent Empath M Magnet
SE Super Empath G Geyser
E Empath (aka Standard Empath) S Savior
School and cadre combined, example: MSE = Magnet Super Empath
Fuel Supply Type
IPPS Intimate Partner Primary Source
IPSS Intimate Partner Secondary Source
DLSIPSS Dirty Little Secret Intimate Partner Secondary Source
SIPSS Shelf Intimate Partner Secondary Source
CIPSS Candidate Intimate Partner Secondary Source
NIPS Non Intimate Primary Source
NISS Non Intimate Secondary Source
TS Tertiary Source
ITS Intimate Tertiary Source
NITS Non-Intimate Tertiary Source
(please see the book ‘Fuel’ to understand more about this hierarchy and its tole with regard to the narcissist)
Additional Frequently Used Acronyms:
ET Emotional Thinking GOSO Get Out Stay Out
LT Logical Thinking ACON Adult Child of Narcissist
N Narcissist GPD Genetic Predisposition
NC No Contact LOCE Lack of Control Environment
ST Silent Treatment PST Present Silent Treatment
AST Absent Silent Treatment
BH Benign Hoover SATN Sex and the Narcissist (book)
MH Malign Hoover TTIF Thank Tudor it’s Friday
TF Thought Fuel
121 thoughts on “Acronyms”
Reading this thread was very interesting. Seeing the words “you are the daughter of a female narcissist” in a comment, I thought to myself, I’d never give myself that “description”. Even though it may be an actual ‘fact’, I am still not her daughter. Why do I say that. Because I am not like her (muvver). Yes, I am my father’s daughter.
And now … drumroll … wait for it … here it comes:
How many Ultra Narcissists do you estimate there to be now on the planet, HG?
Hand on your heart?
Don’t have one (heart).
HG, You do have a heart, it is merely clad in impenetrable inertron and highly defended.
And, of course you are the only Ultra. What other N would even consider doing what you are doing or be capable of doing it so effectively? There are none.
PSE, I did not mean to frighten you. I remember HG stating in a livestream that the difference between the abuse his mother inflicted on him and the one he inflicts on his victims, is that his victims are adults and I second that.
My mother is responsible for my addiction to narcissists, anyone that followed only had to take over the reins and go. I felt like she always had me in her grip and no matter how much I struggled, I could never be free. Later, her hoovers felt like she threw a shrapnel grenade through my window and I was taken right back in time, no other narc ever managed to draw a similar response from me.
When I was a teenager, getting my drivers license became my salvation. In Germany, it is obligatory for your driving instructor to take you to the Autobahn for three hours, so you can learn the ropes. My instructor showed me the basics and then let me drive as fast as I was comfortable with (which was very fast, haha) so I could get a feeling for what it’s like. At 17, this marked the first time I got a taste of freedom and all the possibilities open to me, now that I could on the Autobahn! I dreamed about going fast and wide, then staying out near a lake somewhere, never coming back home.
My fondest memories involve driving on the open road with the top down as the sun sets, all my narc escapes included throwing my bags in that beloved car of mine and driving the hell away from there.
Even now that I live quite central and don’t need it on the daily, it gives me peace of mind to look at my car keys and know that it’s there, in the garage waiting for me.
That I am free.
I don’t know if every German has a similar connection to cars and the Autobahn as I have, but it’s certainly an experience I recommend to anyone. And I also don’t know what your experience with cars is, but if you ever want to get one, you will likely start developing a certain eye for cars and will almost automatically take an interest in the ones that suit you well and fit your needs!
Desiree. It is okay that I was frightened by something that is actually frightening. I am new somewhat to psychology, especially new to reflecting on it, and it is so vast an area of life and so important, that I am thankful that I can now do so. And, I could feel from your words the horror that some parents bring to their offspring, and I could feel from your words your love of the open road as well. I have no experience with automobiles the way my life has worked out, but who knows what the future will bring. I would purchase a Tesla and then I could consult with HG about any problems and questions I have both with people and my car.
GOSO is my favorite KTN acronym.
I love how “GOSO” sounds when I pronounce it out loud. I love how “Get Out Stay Out!” sounds when I imagine HG telling me to do so.
Moreover, it’s a most practical and effective acronym, always coming in very handy if/when ET runs high.
I have no doubt that GOSO has saved me from embarrassing myself and from losing my dignity.
I am SURE that GOSO has helped me stay out of Narcx’s way during his quest for potent new fuel. In return, I got a decent “alimony” deal and got to retain it.
Without GOSO, I would be pathetic and penniless.
HG—Thank you for all that you do here, but especially for GOSO.
You are welcome Lisk.
lisk: What is KTN??
Sorry about that Lisk. Knowing The Narcissist is KTN. I am beginning to fear that I am not good with Acronyms. The other day, I forgot that TTIF means Thank Tudor It’s Friday, and I thought a TTIF was another persona in the Narcissist’s fuel matriz, that I had overlooked. Well, we learn and move on. I am not going to beat myself up over it.
My other favorite (non acronym) is when HG told me “they don’t know why they do what they do..”
Hello HQ, thank your for your blog. and to help people. I understood what’s happened and it make sad but in the same way I am proud of me to know now what was this « relation » and I will never play this horrible game, no way! . I got a question, when I read your article, I see positions but for me It seems I was in a lot of different positions. i was IPSS, DLSIPSS, SIPSS, CIPSS and at the end I was : « you are a special friend». Is that possible I was in every position ? that he turned me everywhere ?. I am a high gifted person and talented, super empath also. but emotionally I am a child and I suffered a lot about his silence treatments, he never really devaluated me, it was more « you are special and fascinating» and he was angry and played pity of his bad life when I would like to go no contact.1- Could the same victim can be in every position ? thank you. sorry for my english, it’s not my language.
Bon soir Portesecretes, if you are confused about where you sit in the Fuel Matrix of the relevant narcissist then this will give you the answer and certainty
Thank you HG, haha Bonsoir, it sounds like you understood that I am french 👌🏻 you are the best !
Welcome lovely one, you’ve come to the right place
I’m so sorry to hear you went thru all this
I believe the “silent treatment” …..IS …DEVALUATION
It’s also emotional abuse
He treated you as a toy (all new toys are special and fascinating) and when the toy is broken .. he gets a new toy
“Normal” people talk it out, resolve issues and move forward, my sweet
Beware of those who give you the silent treatment and use pity plays …. walk away …. big red flag
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
Thank you Bubbles, I wish you all the best too. You are right, silent treatment is a devaluation, and the worst thing. I was not sure about it , thank you to cleaned my thoughts, because he always found a reason like my message was too long then he needs time to answer 😅 or other lies) but now I have found other signs : my Birthdays, he always wished mine before or after the day, or called me during I was with my friends at my party to push me in anger, and christmas always tried to made a bad day for me, he talks and writes like a robot, no empathy, he is very cold in private,big anger when he is frustrated , but he is an angel, everybody like him, when he is with his « friends ». There is a big difference like he was 2 different mans. And no respect, opportunist, jealous. I was very surprised at the beginning I talked to him, he was absolutely not what I knew about it when I was not close to him, He was like a poor man that nobody understood, He had me like that in his cycle, playing the pity. thank you for your past message x
Oops you forgot one
TFC – total fucking c*** 🙏
Ha ha ha…TFC, I am gonna use that!
Lol go ahead K.
I happened to be with one at the time and inspiration hit me!
I’m liking for the prayer hands.
Good reference, HG. Out of curiosity, what would you call a former (escaped) IPPS who’s sought for that position again? (I mean, besides “a problem”).
I feel like it needs to be “Non-Intimate Candidate”- something or another, since the FR/intimacy is over…?
Really? That’s a little disappointing… guess it bugs me a bit to have “intimate” still in the label.
Caroline-is-fine, He’s written in several places that once that line has been crossed, you will always retain the “intimate” part of the label even if treated as a NISS.
I know, MB…I just want the label from *my* perspective, which I realize goes against what the labels are there for anyway.
I don’t *always* have to be reasonable. 😉
Caroline-Is-Fine, if there’s one thing I’ve learned at HGTU, it’s that there isn’t much about narcissism that is “reasonable” from our perspective!
I’ve left a body of water (don’t ask/my life is more unusual than you’d think), and I can’t read my inbox posts too well right now… but I think I’m safe in just saying I agree with you, ’cause I got your vibe, sister…lol
Dearest HG: Is there a GEN as well as an UN?
So are you now an UN?
Always have been.
UN = NU – Número Uno backwards!
HG, what’s the difference between an UGN and an Ultra?
Hello Kaydiva3, the difference is me.
Ah I get it, you are THE Ultra Narcissist. There is no narcissist greater than you.
You got it, HG approves.
I see a lot of NITS around here and one UN (that’s a new one) As far as the gulls, who cares? I am very ready for TTIF though!
MB: What in the world is a TTIF?
PSE, somebody didn’t do their reading assignment! Can you stay after class and see me please?
MB: HG told me to not stay after school with Strangers. Are you a Stranger?
PSE, touché! Let me just say you’d be better off to stay in detention with me than with Prof Tudor. Just sayin’. I’m a pushover compared to him. He’s tough!
MB: I have a nagging suspicion that meeting after school with Dearest HG, would be more fun for me. Hahaha! Especially if he remembers to wear one of those zillion dollar colognes. Case Closed.
PSE, I like the way you think, but don’t make me claw your eyes out! I do have a thick black streak of the narcissistic trait of jealousy. Just kidding. There’s enough HG to go around the world. (Obviously!)
“Dem all want a piece of da HG” or whatever it was he said 🙂
MB: It is all cyclical with him. No worries.
You’re sweet PSE. You know I’m only kidding around. I’ve never clawed anybody’s eyes out.
HG answers questions from his readers on YouTube.
E.B. Of course. Thank Tudor It’s Friday. Hahaha. I was so caught up with IPPS, And TS and DLS, and all the other Persons, that I was thinking that a TTIS was another category of Person in the Fuel Matrix, and I wondered, who is this mysterious intruder?? This TTIF? LOL
PSE, TTIF is what brought me here in may and it’s fantastic and we need it to be a weekly occurance!
Desiree: I also came from his audio, and he has close to 700 of them. I saw a couple of his TTIF and I liked how he said my real name, when he read the readers` comments. My name sounded just wonderful the way he pronounced it. Of course, he does not know the name I am talking about though. So, almost 700 videos have kept me topped off so far.
PSE he does have a lovely voice and I even like the way he pronounces my french name, some people butcher it. I had his videos recommended to me about a year ago first and watched very few. I assumed this was an actor reading it as a fictional character and it was just a creative take on giving advice, altough i quite liked what little content i watched and agreed with it. It’s kind weird to admit to, now that I am here, haha. Youtube recommended his TTIF to me last May, I had a short moment of “wtf this is an actual person and he’s an actual narcissist?” but his chatty tone and jokes in that video warmed me up to him. Came here and dived right in, I love learning about new subjects, especially something that is so relevant to me. Quickly booked an empath detector to dip my feet in and followed that up with my first audio consultation regarding GOSO, because I was suffering from maternal pre-birthday hoovers that were really getting to me. HGs work is so well written and comprehensive, I was able to apply it seamlessly and made huge progress in such short time, I would have never deemed it possible.
Good to read.
Was it Bravest Fucking Toaster on TTIFriday #1?
Desiree, I understand. Have you listened to any of his interviews? It is his voice that I love the most, although his voice is different on different topics on the audios. It shows a different side of him. And a different side of his voice. And you can feel his personality more, altogether. That is how I feel anyway. Desiree, I was shocked when I came on here on Narcsite and saw him talking to all these people. I thought he was only talking to me, all that time!
I really like his interviews, have listened to all of them by now and hope he will agree to more, they offer such interesting new insights and his voice is very nuanced in them. Haha he is good at making people feel like he’s talking to them only isn’t he! Unless you consult with him of course, then that’s actually the case.
Yes, my mother is a mid-ranger, I stumbled upon that knowledge once I read some entries about the matrinarc and then narcisstic parents in general. I used to think it was just her alcoholism that made her like that, now I see she would use the alcohol to do all the awful things she was otherwise too cowardly to do.
It added to my alienation, because everyone would defend her since “that’s the alcohol speaking! she’s not normally like that” but I knew her true self, even before she drank and she was awful from the start.
HGs doesn’t really list parental hoovers as distinct from others, because they are executed essentially the same way. But I feel like they require a distinction just because of the primal fear and hurt they evoke that is unlike any other.
So I call them maternal hoovers since I find they hit quite differently than those of a romantic partner, because there had never even been a golden period to begin with. Even her benign and absent hoovers had an almost dissociating effect on me, reminding me of that first cut she made when I was six. I’ve met other narcissists that made my days hell and would have ruined my life if I had let them, but compared to the damage my mother inflicted, they didn’t even make a dent.
Desiree. I know that HG discuss how they want so much of your attention and all, and he discusses Matrinarcs a lot on many of his memes and with the good doctors and such, as well. Maybe the matrinarc category can be put together at some point because they are on the site in so many different ways. Did you order your Tesla roadster yet? Those open roads are calling.
PrincessSuperEmpath, I am tempted to try it now! It’s coming out next year I think, but I couldn’t commit to any car without taking it to the Autobahn in Summer first. It’s supposed to have the widest reach of any Tesla so far, so that sounds interesting. Plus, I am always partial to convertibles.
Desiree: Wow. I am sure it is incredibly difficult to choose an automobile with all the choices. I hope you find one that suits your personality best. I would not know where to begin. But, I am sure that I would go with a car that worked best with my intuition. If I feel a certain accoutrement should be in one location, and it is in the the exact opposite location. I am out of there. Goodbye car. So, enjoy those test drives. And, you make the autobahn sound fun.
Desiree: You are the Daughter of a female Narcissist. Is that what a maternal hoover is? My goodness.
Desiree: How frightening what you said about the parental hoovers right here. Very Scary: ` But I feel like they require a distinction just because of the primal fear and hurt they evoke that is unlike any other.` HG Tudor!!!! This is so scary!!! Primal Fear. Oh my goodness.
A most helpful and appreciated addition.
One of my readers prepared it and I finessed it.
Kind of you to share that. My appreciation extends to that reader also.
I wonder which NITS (errr reader) prepared it? I bet I can take a guess 🙂
Be my guess(t).
My guess is SuperXena
NA & K, this is like playing Clue! So far it’s not me, K, NA, SuperXena or HG.
My accusation is that it was Mrs. Peacock (with Mr. Peacock as an accomplice) in the library with the lead pipe!
It wasn’t me but whoever it was, Thank you!
K, of course I thought it was you. I didn’t see the need to guess. Thank you to whoever it was. It will be very helpful to new readers.
Lou mentioned FYC, that’s a good guess!
And HG did not react. So it must be her.
FYC, if you did this list, thank you and well done.
Don’t you just love playing Clue! Observe, analyze, deduce.
Is Clue and Cluedo the same game? I know HG cheats at Cluedo.
Me, cheat? An outrageous allegation!
I’m so sorry Mr Tudor, I must be mistaken! (Correct response?)
You do not have to apologise.
Ha ha ha….have you read this article?
I was playing poker by the age of twelve and I cheated left, right and center and I was always the banker in Monopoly but I was surrounded by narcissists so I had to play by their rules to level up the playing field (that’s a blame shift).
K, I’m always the banker in Monopoly and I must have it all exact down to the $1. I am an accountant IRL though so there is that. I would never cheat! It’s frowned upon in my line of work anyway. Of course I’ve never played with narcissists that I know of. Monopoly that is. There are plenty IRL to play games!
Ha ha ha… when I was a kid, I was a sheep in wolf’s clothing. Now, I am usually an empath unless there’s an external act that causes me to don my wolf suit.
K, I completely understand you having to evolve in that way. It truly essential to your very survival. You are a survivor and a bad ass wolf when you need to be. I admire you.
Thank you MB!
Ha ha ha…now, I finally understand my behaviour and I am quite fond of my personality.
I get a family vacation vibe from your IG pics. Has Matrinarc rented a chalet for a big happy family facade holiday?
Dammit! You did say it wasn’t a holiday. But it sure didn’t look like a work event!
Shows how little you know about what I do, MB!!
Are they hiring?
Yet, one you don’t deny. 🙂
(Walking away briskly now… but I *refuse* to run)
I do K.
K, maybe whoever it is will claim it so we can thank them properly 😊
MB: Yes! Maybe HG can hire us all, someday. You can do all his accounting, billing and customer Service work, with your own staff, and I could be HG`s intake person for his Private Client Consulting Services. I would make sure each client was seated in a comfy large chair at the client waiting stations, and bring each client coffee or tea or fresh juice drinks or hard liquor, whatever the client needed, with fluffy stark clean napkins while I inquired from them and wrote down all the dirty details of their situation, in an emergency triage sort of protocol. Then, I would present the preliminary info. to HG to look over before he called each client into his zillion dollar office. I would love that.
Dearesst HG: Finally!
PSE, I’d love to work for HG! I do suspect he’d be a tough boss though. One of those difficult to please kind of bosses. It might be worth it! I hear he throws good after work parties with loud music and rum and hot tubs. Possibly even mussels. I’ve never eaten them, but I’m down to try if HGs buying! Can I send my application to email@example.com ?
MB: Nah…He will fine with you and me. Plus, we are intuitive and empathetic and smart. We will know when he is in a good mood or not and send secret smoke signals to each other about when to hide out. And we will be major components of the Brand of the company. And the hand holding of VIP clients. I love that. I actually would feel the angst with the clients as I wrote down the details of their difficult situations, and they would sense that and they would be glad. And HG will advise them on how to fix the nightmares they get themselves into. But, we three will all be on the same page: The Prime Aims of the Company: Success! HG will have some of his positive fuel needs met by us, and his negative fuel needs met elsewhere. He will not destroy his own company, because he is a very intelligent man, and he also will have other responsibilities and activities and interests outside of the company, anyway. If heads roll, it will not be my head nor your head. Maybe some random tertiary sources, etc.
Haha PSE, You’ve really put a lot of thought into this! I love fantasies so I’m right there with you in our pretend plush office with HG.
Just don’t get your hopes up! That tipping point is a bitch to quash.
Wow that would the business
Can I join .Would give up my job to be part of that.
MB: Hahaha! And we have Kiki, ladies and Gentlemen. Kiki can be in charged of our Ethics Review Department. She will make sure we do not become too advanced.
Kiki: The company handles largely Extreme, Esoteric, Unbelievable Emergencies all compartmentalized on a Need to Know basis. Lots of plausible deniability when needed and so forth. Very intricate and complex situations that our VIP clients sort of wander into through no fault of their own, of course.
This really is HGU ! tyvm!
Brilliant HG! Thank you!
Very helpful, thank you.
I had understood there were only 4 schools of Empaths: (Standard) E, C, CoD and SE and that the Mt was not a school.
In your book Your Fault you say that the Martyr is a Super Empath and one of the three “Categories” in the Matrix of Blame.
It is a formatting issue EB, it should be corrected now.
I see, thank you.
haha there’s an acronym whose meaning I am not sure about. I personally would love a new TTIF, his livestream in May was what brought me to his blog and good for me!
I actually thought about that this morning, is the UN a category you cut out to fit yourself and yourself only?
It is. Suits me perfectly.
Understood. Now I just need further insight into what that means, exactly. I’m guessing an Ultra is the one Narc in the universe against whom even HGs advice won’t work because he is just that god-like delicious and sexy I mean have you heard him breathing how could anyone resist thats right you cant so don’t even try just pour fourth that delicous fuel and bask in the glory that is this Ultra.
Did Pamela come up with the acronyms?
Ha ha, no.
Is this list related in one of your books ? I need to to learn more , about The Dirty Little Secret secondary source , I Believe That Is Me Now !
Hello Nicole, use the search function and you will find an article about the DLS. You may also wish to consider
Dear Mr Tudor,
Luv Bubbles xx 😘