How The Narcissist Conquers Your Senses To Feed On You



I ensure that through my enthralling enchantment of you during seduction that I create tunnel vision for you. I am all that you see. Not only is it the case because I make it my mission to spend every moment I can with you, but I ensure that I am all that is seen in your mind’s eye as well. If I am not physically present with you then I will have done sufficient during the course of the day so far to have you thinking about me repeatedly. When will I call? That was such a delightful message that I sent earlier? Where will he take me tonight? He makes me so happy, I am so lucky. I will be the only person in your sights. You will allow friendships to fall by the wayside, not see family as often and even begin to neglect your interests possibly even work in order to see me. You want to look on me all the time because the love and radiance you see (which is actually just being mirrored back towards you) is so magnetic, so compelling and utterly addictive. You will stretch that lunch hour from work to spend longer over lunch with me. You will cancel that gym class tonight so you can see me rather than wait another day. You will cut short drinks with friends so you can get across to my house so you at least have part of the evening seeing me. All you will see is me and all you will see is how good, wonderful, amazing and brilliant I am as I carefully apply that rose-tinted filter across your eyes and you will not even notice.

Even when I have cast you aside or if you have been able to escape me, my construction of the ever presence will result in you seeing me everywhere around you. You see my ghost at the window, where I would stand looking at the view as I waited for you to get ready before going out. You see me lying on the bed, patting it and inviting you into it for another ecstatic session of love-making. You see me across from you at the dinner table, walking up the drive way and in that usual seat on the tube which is where we first met. You pick up a book and see me reading it, asking your thoughts about it. You pick up a jumper and it is blue, my favourite colour and you see me once again. I have infected anything and everything around you as I ensure that I am seen everywhere you look. Even closing your eyes is no escape, for then, perhaps more than anywhere else you still see my image pin-sharp and evident.

I make sure that I am the only voice that you hear. Not only do you feel that tingling sensation when I whisper in your ear, tell you rude things down the telephone or read that particular piece of poetry that you love – all acts designed to have you respond automatically to the sound of my voice – I am ensuring that I am blocking out the sounds from any competitors or detractors During seduction I only want you hearing my voice. This has two effects. Firstly, you are listening to my propaganda all of the time and with no dissenting voices able to get through to you, you accept what I say and do so quickly. Secondly, I am causing, through repeated reinforcement, you to become addicted to the sound of my voice. You will associate hearing me speak and especially saying your name with something that is wonderful and this increases the potency of your addiction to me.

I will use music specially to create so many links between you and I. Each special moment that we share should have its own particular soundtrack. The first meeting, the first time I gave you a lift in my car. The first time we made love, the first meal I cooked for you and the first you cooked for me. The time we sat and watched a storm together, holding hands. Music plays a huge part in assailing your sense of hearing and creating powerful connections between the beautiful things we once did together and certain pieces of music. We will ensure our relationship has catch phrases so that when you watch an advertisement you hear my voice saying the same sentence as I did when we were together. Every time there was a knock at the front door, I said the same thing and it made you laugh no matter how many times you had heard it. Now, when there is a knock, even though I have gone, you hear my voice. No matter how hard you try to evade hearing my voice or hearing the sounds that are inextricably linked to many moments in the relationship that we had, you will continue to be assailed by them even when I am no longer stood beside you or in a relationship with you.

I apply my scent, like some beast marking its territory, ensuring that during the seduction certain smells – my after shave, my anti-perspirant, my shower gel, the washing powder I use, the air freshener in my house are all direct links to me. The olfactory connection that I establish is a unique code between you and I. For each relationship I create a different set of fragrances so that there is not just one reminder of me but six. I smell so good and I reinforce this by allowing you to keep a shirt of mine imbued with my scent when I am away so that you can sniff it as you lie in bed. It seems such a delightful gesture of mine, so that you have something to remind you of me when I am on a business trip but I am creating your addiction through your sense of smell and paving the way for you to be unable to smell sandalwood in the future without thinking instantly of me. You will associate so many smells with me, from personal fragrances, to the smell of my house, the interior of my car, the meals we take together and so forth. It is all designed to ensure that you make the connection between the wonderful and that fragrance during the seduction so that you cannot do anything but remember those golden moments when you happen to smell a particular scent at a later stage. It is the most powerful evoker of memory.

I will use taste to create yet more fantastic bonds between us. I will encourage you to try different foods, different dishes at restaurants that you will enjoy. I will introduce a signature drink to you, something that you have not had before, so that you really enjoy it and immediately associate its tangy taste with me. You will recognise and become swept away by the taste of my kiss. A wonderful and mesmerising taste which sends you into sensory overload, making you tremble with anticipation. I ensure that certain tastes will be linked to those wonderful moments and memories. You are not that special however as these tasting techniques will have been used with others and will be used with others again.

Finally, you will crave my touch and want to touch me. The times you felt the stubble on my face with your hand, or against your cheek as I gently kissed you as you dozed. You delighted in the sensation of defined chest as your hand brushed across it. The times you would always allow your palm to stroke my newly shorn hair, the short and soft hairs gracing your hand. How you felt so safe when you felt my arms around you at night or when I took your hand in mine, telling you without saying anything that everything would be alright. How you now miss my expert ministrations as my tender fingers probed and caressed finding all the right places, creating another scintillating experience that now with my departure you still yearn for. The way I placed my hands on your shoulders when I arrived from work and approached you from behind, the reassurance, familiarity and strength flowing from me to you as sat down you tilted your head against my arm and my fingers began to massage your shoulders. The way I used to wipe the tears from your eyes with my mouth, the delicate application of my lips soothing and absorbing the source of your woe. The times I would tickle you until you could not breathe but the delight soared inside of you. How you now miss touching me and being touched by me.

I will always fill up your senses so I become your universe. I will always fill up your senses so that even through the numbness I leave you with, you crave seeing me, smelling me, hearing me, touching me and tasting me. I fill up your senses and then take it all away making you crave the return to such a degree that it is not a question of if, but when, I shall allow you to be filled up once again.

17 thoughts on “How The Narcissist Conquers Your Senses To Feed On You

  1. Anjelica says:

    The worst Thing so far was the idea that I´d rather take him – the illusion – back than renounce these amazing sensations in the future. How could a “normal” guy ever compete with THIS? I´d prefer the blue pill maybe? This article really helped. A LOT.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Good to know.

  2. njfilly says:

    I’ve been in many relationships and have never experienced some of the things you talk about.

    Have I been neglected or have I only experienced reality? I have never had a man kiss my tears away. No wonder it is so difficult to lose.

    Master of Puppets

    End of passion play, crumbling away
    I’m your source of self-destruction
    Veins that pump with fear, sucking darkest clear
    Leading on your death’s construction

    Taste me you will see
    More is all you need
    Dedicated to
    How I’m killing you

    Come crawling faster (faster)
    Obey your master (master)
    Your life burns faster (faster)
    Obey your master, master!

    Master of puppets, I’m pulling your strings
    Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams
    Blinded by me, you can’t see a thing
    Just call my name ’cause I’ll hear you scream
    Master, master!

    Needlework the way, never you betray
    Life of death becoming clearer
    Pain monopoly, ritual misery
    Chop your breakfast on a mirror

    Master, master, where’s the dreams that I’ve been after?
    Master, master, you promised only lies
    Laughter, laughter, all I hear or see is laughter
    Laughter, laughter, laughing at my cries
    Fix me!

    Hell is worth all that, natural habitat
    Just a rhyme without a reason
    Never-ending maze, drift on numbered days
    Now, your life is out of season

    I will occupy
    I will help you die
    I will run through you
    Now I rule you too

    Come crawling faster (faster)
    Obey your master (master)
    Your life burns faster (faster)
    Obey your master, master!


  3. cogra002 says:

    Yep, this pretty much sums it up. The Golden period. The Narc could have written this. I would say he operates exactly like this.
    The only thing you left out was juggling the harem while addicting someone new.
    Exactly what happens. Dead on.

    Wonder to what degree the Narc knew what he was doing, had everything planned in advance…..I’ll increase the constant attention 1 month. Mid October, I’ll begin with the sexual banter and by Nov 1st, we’ll be having phone sex or cyber sex . Mid Dec I will discard, so the holidays are maximum pain. I’ll spend part of the holidays luring you back then Jan 1, you will have a new level of devaluation that will take your breathe away, literally.
    In the meantime, I’ll continue trolling a few Asian women that look like good prospects.

  4. kaydiva3 says:

    My ex MMRN made me mushroom risotto for Valentines day and once when I wasn’t feeling well. A lovely dish, but I haven’t been able to eat it or even tolerate the sight or smell of it since he discarded me.

  5. Pingback: How The Narcissist Conquers Your Senses To Feed On You ⋆ NarcTopia
  6. Desirée says:

    “the love and radiance you see (which is actually just being mirrored back towards you) is so magnetic, so compelling and utterly attractive.”

    Narcissus fell in love with his own reflection and pined away.
    We call your condition Narcissism as if it was characterised by an obsession with yourself, implying it will be your downfall. In reality, it is the victim that is so infatuated with themselves (mirrored back to them by the narcissist who is able to portray anything because they are empty) that they are willing to sacrifice everything just to look in the mirror again and again.
    It’s not your supposed solipsism that will be the death of us, but ours.

  7. E. B. says:

    Over 16,000,000 hits! Congratulations on your well-deserved success, HG.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you

  8. Mija says:

    We wrote to each other for months.
    Immediately after knowing him in my head (consciousness?) In a state of pollen – meditative state began to appear texts. Who built them? I didn’t make them up. Who made them in me? I’m trying to understand that. I wrote them down. I also heard the song that way.
    These were the lyrics:

    Even if I had a clear feeling (certainty)
    Meeting you, that this is what I am looking for and that it is you
    I wouldn’t say that anyway
    Although I have expressed it before not knowing you (personally)
    It can all happen if you let me
    Now be farther than closer.

    Consciousness speaks
    it hurts
    calling someone’s heart for years

    It happened and it is so

    I love you
    I love when I look
    I love when I’m silent

  9. Veronique Jones says:

    Why don’t narcissists just pick other narcissists you would both get what you want in the golden period and when it comes to ending the relationship no problem just move on?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Read When Narcissists Collide.

      1. Veronique Jones says:

        So its about the quality of the fuel not just the fuel itself ???

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Read Fuel.

  10. WAF Tudorita says:

    Get this.
    The Autumn air smells like my narcoholic.
    The Winter air smells like my MMR elite

    The. Fucking. AIR.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You won’t be the only one who makes such a connection

      1. Violetta says:

        Do you eat, sleep, do you breathe me anymore?
        Do you sleep, do you count sheep anymore?
        Do you sleep anymore?
        Do you take plight on my tongue like lead?
        Do you fall gracefully into bed anymore?
        I saw you as you walked across my room.
        You looked out the window, you looked at the moon.
        And you sat on the corner of my bed, and
        you smoked with the ghost in the back of my head.
        And I don’t know, and I don’t care
        If I ever will see you again.
        I don’t know, and I don’t care
        If I ever will be there.
        Do you eat, sleep, do you breathe me anymore?
        Do you sleep, do you keep me anymore?
        You kick my foot under the table,
        I kick you back;
        I can’t say I’m able to
        Stand for you or
        Fall for you ever again.
        Wish for a perfect setting?
        Wishing that I am letting you
        Take me where you want me
        All over again?
        You can’t give yourself absolutely to someone else.
        And I don’t know, and I don’t care
        If I ever will see you again.
        I don’t know, and I don’t care
        If I ever will be there.
        I saw you as you walked across my room.
        You looked out the window, you looked at the moon.
        And you sat on the corner of my bed, and
        You smoked with the ghost in the back of my head.
        Do you eat, sleep, do you breathe me anymore?
        Do you sleep, do you count sheep anymore?
        Do you sleep anymore?
        I don’t know, and I don’t care
        If I ever will be there.
        Will be there?

        – Lisa Loeb

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