When we seduce you, we want to absorb you. We want to make you part of us. This is because we see you as an extension of ourselves but it is also because we want to ensure that you are isolated and cut-off from any potential threats to our grand design for you. It is also because we want you exposed to those who will only increase and magnify our charm, our magnetism and our attraction. This means we need to expose you to and integrate you within our own networks. Accordingly, where we are the type of narcissist that has a significant social circle and family connections, you will be thrust into their midst very quickly when the seduction has begun. It is akin to taking hold of you, hanging you over a vat of liquid which represents all of our supporters, admirers and adorers and dunking you straight into it ensuring you are wholly covered, utterly subsumed and completely covered. You will be paraded around these various sources of ours in order to extract fuel from their admiration at our latest conquest. Our smearing of your predecessor will mean that that person is rarely mentioned and if they are it will be in terms which are disparaging about them and complimentary about us. That is how our coterie and lieutenants have been conditioned to respond for the purposes of maintaining our glorious appearance. We will draw fuel from all of their complimentary remarks and furthermore we will be able to gather fuel from your delighted reaction at being presented as such a wonderful and perfect person. It amounts to a fuel fest for us. This integration with those who worship us and promote our agenda is a crucial part of how we embed you into our world. You are made to feel special and wanted, liked and involved as you find yourself invited to a family dinner, a christening, a wedding, nights out with our friends, drinks with other friends, an afternoon coffee and so on. So many ways to plug you into our world by using the all obliging members of our façade. This absorption convinces you that we are the real deal. Who in in their right mind would stand against such conviction from so many people? Nobody of course and that is how our magic is woven. You feel so fortunate. Not only have you met the partner of your dreams but our family are so welcoming and friendly, and our friends are delightful. Nobody has a bad word to say about us. Little do you realise that this is almost like a television programme with actors playing the parts of family and friends and the wonderful places and events that we take to you are just scenery that has been created to give the appearance of reality. If you were able to look behind the scenes then you would see one-dimensional cardboard cut-outs, masking tape and spray paint. You will not notice though. We do not allow you sufficient time to take everything in. You are whisked from one thing to another, festooned with compliments, spun around, whirled about and not given any opportunity to consider, reflect or scrutinise. Everything is moving, shining and sparkling in order to distract you. Oh those klaxons are blaring but you cannot hear them for the honey being poured in your mouth. The red flags are flying but there is so much glitter being thrown about by us, so much fairy dust hanging in the air that you are unable to see those scarlet warnings.

We want to draw you into us through ensuring that you are utterly immersed in our supportive and obliging networks. This also means that if you happen to have some kind of concern, perhaps a slight inkling that something is not quite right and you ask one of the many people you have been introduced to, you will receive the party line in response in order to assuage your concern. This absorbing into our world, our band of merry supporters provides you with no chance to resist. Whereas in your past you may have found the mother-in-law to be distant or a brother unwelcoming, friends jealous that their friend now has a new distraction and so forth, all of those potential problems do not exist with us. This is because the few that might know what we are, the handful which may identify that there is something wrong with us even though they may not know exactly what we are, will have been side-lined. They are not allowed to point out that the beautiful world that we have created is one of smoke and mirrors. Their dissenting voices have been silenced, their pointing fingers cut off and they have been bundled away. If you ever ask about them we will either ignore your question or advance an entirely plausible reason why we no longer have anything to do with our brother. As you will recognise by now, it will all be his fault.

You are to be subsumed not only into our identity as we swallow you up to form part of us, a functioning and reliable appliance pumping fuel our way, but you are also woven into the tapestry that is our illusion. Each introduction, each party, each greeting, each pleasant afternoon getting to know members of our coterie is but a further needle stroke as we pass the thread over you and enmesh you into our illusion. Tighter and tighter the thread becomes until you are a complete part of it. Of course, should you eventually realise that you have been woven into a fabrication, the thread will be so tight about you, so complete and so covering that escape is nigh on impossible without the assistance of someone else who is able to cut you free.


3 thoughts on “Absorb

  1. Pati says:

    I still feel absorbed by him. He has isolated me from my friends and family. When I go to a family event he tells me who to talk to. Control freak! I have come to realise that they have figured out something is not quite right with him.
    We went to a family event last night and he only talks to the people he wants to talk to.
    HG I am now pretending that everything is ok between us when it is not, I dont feel it anymore. I come from families that dont believe in divorce. I am praying he will find someone else and leave me so I wont look like the bad person I can’t take the facade on my part now.

  2. Gypsy Heart says:

    They would definitely always try to keep me close and in their inner circle. My father would rarely let me go anywhere without him. When I was with my husband I lost all my friends and his inner circle would joke that we were inseparable. As the DLS, he would say “just don’t forget about me ” when I was making new friends. Also if I didn’t immediately come to his house after work he would question “did you get lost along the way?”

  3. WokeAF says:

    ”Little do you realise that this is almost like a television programme with actors playing the parts of family and friends and the wonderful places and events that we take to you are just scenery that has been created to give the appearance of reality”

    SO ACCURATE. My MMR elite had SO many friends, everyone knew him and he had an introductory funny story for every person (how they know each other, something they’d done together). he had a new, promising career, making good money, liked to go out and do fun things and socialize , and he was a Man that could handle any situation and always solve the problem. He made me feel like I was the sexiest woman He’d ever known.
    His facade was very good.
    And that was just for ME..and I was only a s-IPSS!

    I know he did all this and much much more for his IPPS
    I can only imagine what she must think since In the few years she’s been living here, she’s obviously realized that
    -he doesn’t have any friends (only 3000 acquaintances with absolutely no substance)
    -He barely works and uses her money, got her to buy a house, cars, etc
    – he actually rarely goes out and socializes
    -he’s just a big baby.
    -he’s not faithful

    Completely the *opposite* of what was presented.

    It’s so weird though because they’re a totally different person than who you met- but you still feel like you love them. I still have trouble understanding that

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