They Will Not Believe You

 

THEY WILL NOT BELIEVE YOU

Go on then, tell them all what has happened to you? Go on, here, take my phone and ring my parents, my family and my friends. Ring my colleagues too. Telephone the golf club in fact why don’t you take out an advertisement in a local, no, make it a national newspaper and tell everybody about how badly you have been treated?

Climb on the roof and shout it to the neighbourhood, tell everyone who calls at our door and bellow it to strangers as they walk past. Do it, go on, tell them about. Announce it, broadcast it, transmit it, send it out by mail, e-mail ,message and radio signal. Have it blaring from the radio, repeatedly playing on television, hell I will even let you strap a message to a flock of pigeons and you can let them deliver the news that way. Scrawl how badly you have been treated by me on a piece of paper and wrap it around a brick and hurl it through the window at the police station. Scream it long and loud until you are hoarse. Go on, tell them, tell them all.

Tell my parents about their successful son who has studied hard, achieved brilliant results and now excels at work about what I do? Why don’t you gather all my friends around here and announce to them what a bastard I am? I am sure they will be intrigued to listen to you saying that about their loyal and dependable friend who always makes time for them and has helped them out in repeated ways through his largesse and influence.

Pop next door and bang on their front door, explain to them with your wild eyes and even wilder hair what has really been happening? After all, I only every show them friendship and politeness don’t I? I don’t think they have heard me shouting at you (I wait until they are away before I raise my voice) but I know they have heard you ranting and bawling.

Go to the local shopping parade and mention to the pleasant lady at the bakery what I really get up to behind closed doors. I am sure she will love to hear you tell her all about the charming man who is her best customer and has arranged for her to supply the restaurant of two of my friends.

Call my brother and give him chapter and verse. Oh you can’t because he won’t answer the ‘phone to you anymore will he? I know, head down to the gym and see if you can interest any of the regulars with a hysterical rant about the chap who they all say hello to and who works out quietly and regularly. Type out a memo for my colleagues and circulate it to them. I am sure they will be interested to read all about their boss who holds the keys to their future.

Declare it to the group I attend football with, they will want to know all about what I do won’t they? What’s that? These are all my people. At last you have recognised the truth of the matter in between your vile outbursts and hateful comments. I know then, ring up your sister and see what she has to say, mind you, I daresay you won’t want to give her the satisfaction after the way she came on to me would you?

Tell your friends all about it. Oh wait, they are now my friends and all they have ever seen is how happy I have made you, the gifts, the trips, the presents and the love. What about the vicar? He will listen to you I am sure. It is what he does after all although what he will make of such slander against a regular attendee at his sermons and generous charity donor remains to be seen.

Do it, grab a loudspeaker, create a banner, haul a message behind an aeroplane and write it in the sand on the beach. Do it in this frenzied manner with words spilling from your twisted mouth, a word salad which makes no sense. I am sure the staccato way you spit out your accusations will be well-received.

Make sure they look deep into your crazy eyes when you are talking to them, I want them to see who they are really dealing with. Tell your father will you? Ha, he has put up with this for years and was glad to see you leave home, he told me himself. He knows what a drama queen you are and as for your mother well she hates confrontation and she adores me since she knows just how much I have done for you.

Go on, beat your tiny fists about that façade, see if you can punch some holes in it although I know you will not be able to. Shout and stamp and holler all you like. I will enjoy watching you do that and there will be no favourable outcome for you. You are the crazy one and you are trying to unseat the stable, rational, dependable and ultimately far more likeable me.

But you keep trying, it amuses and fuels me as your bloodied hands slap against the façade with no effect and your voice becomes no more than a rasp. I will watch as the hope fades in your eyes to be replaced by fear and incomprehension. Keep trying though, keep going and reinforce what I have already indoctrinated them to believe.

They believe me.

They won’t believe you.

9 thoughts on “They Will Not Believe You

  1. Michelle says:

    I think this is one of the hardest lessons to learn about a narcissist. In my experience, as a rule, the longer a person has known the narcissist without the facade slipping, the less likely they are to ever realize what the narcissist truly is. The notion that the narcissist is a good person folds in neatly with the idea that you are mentally unstable and you must have done something to deserve this. Relationships that require little compromise and negotiation, such as casual friendships, do not offer any real opportunity for the facade to slip; they are based on niceties and narcissists do that well. Narcissists’ facades are particularly strong among people like extended family, who likely only see them giving nice gifts at birthdays and holidays. I watched my mother do all of this, and recently AeroNarc, who is basically the male version of my mother. I share some 40+ mutual friends (including an esteemed colleague) with AeroNarc and I’ve only attempted to tell one of them what he really is. I’m just sitting back and watching his facade maintenance with intellectual curiosity. They all believe him to be a kind and altruistic person, but it is all fake. The more I see the more obvious it is that his acts of kindness serve another purpose and I no longer sense any contradiction between the facade and what lies beneath, but for most people who know him, the revelation would be horrifying and implausible.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Well stated. The application of logic.

    2. Summer says:

      Thank you for sharing Michelle. Very helpful

  2. Summer says:

    reading this stuns me. He has my family especially the 2 most precious to me: my baby Sis & my Father. He has all my friends but 1. I was accused of slander. I never thought I would get a tattoo but I tattooed a barrier around my heart. This site, the books, the consultations, the packages are powerful medicine & i will take it

  3. Bubbles 🍾 says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,
    I can vouch for that
    Nobody believes you
    I have a lifetime to prove it
    Perhaps, just being female has a lot to do with, just saying!

    Listen look observe and take on board, narcs set, bait, trap and maintain, they have you by your short n curlys
    Your article speaks volumes Mr Tudor
    You end up the saint 😇
    Luv Bubbles xx 😘

    1. Lorelei says:

      Hi Bubbles–some indeed believe it! My ex’s life is a testament to a facade gone awry. The high functioning members of his family of course still are in his camp to self preserve of course–but they, the ones that mattered extended their disapproval to me as I am certain it was obvious. There are holes in the cheese that intuitive people often can see, but the importance is to understand that these people will not ultimately “go to bat” for you because normal people just go on about their lives. I do—I don’t have time to get in the middle of squabbles either. But they often do have observations, they just don’t stand on a hill top and shout. So, I agree with HG’s post overall, but at times, the lack of being believed isn’t always accurate–it is really about tending to one’s own life. I have barely breathed a word publicly and this aids my overall demeanor substantially. This is our strength in a way. Now right at first I said a few things–to his mother. But HG’s depiction of wild hair and eyes is accurate. In my case, my ex had a prolific social media campaign of photos indicating drunken antics with incredible appearing accuracy of where the issue was. It was useful for those in “his camp” and beyond to observe. He looked like a frat boy gone wild. In a way I feel sorry for my kids having observed the party boy bullshit because they deserve more. Many many narcissists would not even act the way he has.

      1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dearest Lorelei,
        Oh absolutely, I agree, people do observe and most people do not want to get involved
        I won’t involve myself either, only if they ask for my opinion, but then with hesitancy
        In my case, growing up (different era back then) when asked, ( I never volunteered the information) they appeared “shocked into disbelief”
        Even Mr Bubbles has trouble comprehending my mother, he does, only because he witnesses it …. but even then, he still can’t believe it
        I guess no one knew the dynamics of a “narcissist” back then, (as we know it now) and how to handle it
        Perhaps my stories were just unbelievable, they couldn’t really do anything anyway
        Perhaps they were aware, I’ll never know

        Our youngest is being influenced by ” their narc partner” and decided to be quite “opinionated” on Mothers Day, the “rest of us” can all see what’s going on
        They are in the process of moving house, into the area the partner originated from, basically coming down in the world (near the mum n her partner)
        Slowly isolating our youngest from our family by moving further out
        I did make a list of the pros n cons of the area, however, it was brushed off swiftly
        We all know what’s happening, if any of us daresay anything, we’re the bad guys

        I’m saddened your children had to witness their father not being the upstanding parental role model, interesting he doesn’t act as you say narcissists should
        It will affect them in some way or another
        Who will believe them ?
        Luv Bubbles xx 😘

  4. zwartbolleke says:

    “haul a message behind an aeroplane”
    Who would do such a thing??
    (wink)

  5. DrHouse says:

    This shit sounds exhausting. I feel your fear. I hope you find to yourself.

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