You Are Being Conned : Music

 

 

 

The manifestation of love has been appropriated by our kind, the narcissists, for a very long time. We are the ones who achieve positions of power, influence and reach to set many agendas in the world and none more so that the concept of love. What you see in films, on television, in books, in supposed guides to securing love, in memes, in “inspirational” quotes, written in cards and through music is heavily contaminated by the perception of love from our perspective. This narrative belongs to us and it is used to shape how non-narcissists are conditioned to believe in love, to our advantage and to your detriment. Here, I take four famous love songs (and the choice of potential examples is huge) long understood to encapsulate wonderful, romantic love and demonstrate to you what is really going on underneath. Once again you are being conned.

 

 

God Only Knows by The Beach Boys

 

I may not always love you

(Threatened Loss, Glimpse of the Future, Told You So – I am organising an excuse because my actions will certainly demonstrate that I do not love you, however I am going to tell you something in the next two lines which (in my world) excuses this and you will overlook it because of the grandiose Flattery that it contains, are you ready?)
But long as there are stars above you

(Grandiosity)
You never need to doubt it

(Since there will  always be stars, even though I do not DEMONSTRATE love, this supposedly romantic comparison means I obviously still love you even though I am actually behaving in a manner which tells you that I am not and you will overlook this, dazzled by the comparison to celestial magnificence.)
I’ll make you so sure about it

(Sounds like I am heavily invested in you doesn’t it? Damn right, I need to make you so sure about it so I can control you and obtain what I need from you.)
God only knows what I’d be without you

(I am so important that only The Supreme Power has sufficient knowledge to understand me if I lost you. How is that for grandiosity?)

 

If you should ever leave me
Though life would still go on, believe me

(I am elevating what we have above life itself, relegating it to something that just goes on in the background. Flattery and Grandiosity)
The world could show nothing to me

(Flattery and Grandiosity)
So what good would living do me

(Grand Pity Play and Threatened Loss)

God only knows what I’d be without you

(I am so important that only The Supreme Power has sufficient knowledge to understand me if I lost you. How is that for grandiosity?)

God only knows what I’d be without you

(I am so important that only The Supreme Power has sufficient knowledge to understand me if I lost you. How is that for grandiosity? Are you understanding just how important I am yet although it is designed to make you feel important for the purposes of getting you under my control.

If you should ever leave me
Though life would still go on, believe me
The world could show nothing to me
So what good would living do me

(I am repeating myself because I don’t think I need to say anything more, what I am telling you if of such grand importance I am just going to ram the message home. Are you ready for some serious ramming home?)

God only knows what I’d be without you

God only knows what I’d be without you
God only knows what I’d be without you
God only knows what I’d be without you
God only knows what I’d be without you (God only knows)
God only knows what I’d be without you (what…

(Message received? Good, it ought to be after that repetition. You belong to me.)

 

 

Unchained Melody by the Righteous Brothers

Oh, my love, my darling

(Objectification and Ownership you are mine)
I’ve hungered for your touch

(Your touch is fuel and signifies control and I need that signal that you are under my control.)
A long, lonely time

(Pity Play)
Time goes by so slowly

(Pity Play)
And time can do so much

(Grandiose statement)
Are you still mine?

(Ownership – note, what can I do for you, but do I still have control over you?)
I need your love

(My needs before yours, I feel I do not have control therefore I am doling out a Pity Play because I actually need your fuel and to control you.)
I need your love

(I will repeat it because then it MUST be true.)
God speed your love to me

(I will invoke The Supreme Power because after all I am very important and he should do my bidding. (The Big Guy Upstairs has his work cut out attending to the demands of our kind as you might now be gathering.))

Lonely rivers flow

(Pity Play)
To the sea, to the sea
To the open arms of the sea

(You should be there for me – Sense of Entitlement)
Lonely rivers sigh

(Pity Play)
“Wait for me, wait for me”

(You should do what I want – Sense of Entitlement)
I’ll be coming home, wait for me

(Sense of Entitlement – query why am I not at home already? Have I cleared off somewhere else or have you escaped me? Wonder why? I think I had better do some ramming, cannot let The Beach Boys use up all the ramming home.)

 

Oh, my love, my darling
I’ve hungered, for your touch
A long, lonely time
Time goes by so slowly
And time can do so much
Are you still mine?
I need your love
I need your love
God speed your love to me

(There, that should drive the message home. You had better come back to me now.)

 

 

 

Something by The Beatles

 

Something in the way she moves

(Vague Flattery – this sounds romantic and mysterious but I actually have no idea what it is and I am unable to discern it.)
Attracts me like no other lover

(Nobody can be as attracted to you as I am because I am the best, remember that.)
Something in the way she woos me

(It is the other way around, but we will not let that get in the way of making out that I am the victim here.)

I don’t want to leave her now

(I am helpless in the face of your magnetism, after all, remember, I am the victim.)
You know I believe and how

(More vagueness but I am unable to define this so I will just keep it vague, that sounds more romantic and of course gives me more scope for plausible deniability.)

Somewhere in her smile she knows

(Magical Thinking. You do not have a clue really.)
That I don’t need no other lover

(I will make her think that and I think that. For now.)
Something in her style that shows me

(More vagueness – I am getting good at this and it is working very well.)

Don’t want to leave her now

(See, you have ensnared me.)
You know I believe and how

You’re asking me will my love grow

(You are a little uncertain but you are trying to pin some accountability on me here and that will never do.)
I don’t know, I don’t know

(Keep you on your toes with Uncertainty so you have to do something about it.)
You stick around, now it may show

(You do as you are told and MAYBE you will see some love. So, this is me telling you that you need ot demonstrate to me that you are under my control and you might get something in return.)
I don’t know, I don’t know

Something in the way she knows

(Vague Flattery)
And all I have to do is think of her

(Hoover Trigger)
Something in the things she shows me

(Vague Flattery)

I don’t want to leave her now

(I am captivated, you have made it so I do not want to leave, so you should feel special now after I have told you this.)
You know I believe and how

(You haven’t a clue.)

 

 

Love Hurts by Everly Brothers, Gram Parsons, Nazareth, Cher and Others

 

Love hurts

(Being wounded by a loss of control hurts me. My version of love will actually hurt you.  Love based on emotional empathy does not hurt, but I don’t know anything about that, so you have to hear it from my perspective.)
Love scars

(See above. Pity Play.)
Love wounds and marks

(See above. Pity Play.)
Any heart not tough or strong enough

(You need to be able to take what I am going to dole out in order to prove that you love me.)
To take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain

(Pain is nor involved when love is based on emotional empathy, but I do not understand that.)

Love is like a cloud, it holds a lot of rain

(No it’s not, but I think it is and you will come to pour with rain because of the way I treat you, but don’t question that because love is meant to hurt, okay?)
Love hurts

(See above)
Ooh love hurts

(Have you got it yet? This love thing is so painful. For me, but hell, I am such a brilliant person I will push through it for you and it will hurt for you but do understand that is how love is, so you have to put up with it, because if you do not, then you do not love me and that makes you a bad person.)

 

I’m young
I know
But even so
I know a thing or two, I learned from you

(Excuse, False Humility, Flattery)
I really learned a lot, really learned a lot

(I mimicked you because unlike me, you actually do know something about love although the rest of what you know comes from nonsense like this.)

Love is like a flame, it burns you when it’s hot

(Melodrama, Pity Play.)
Love hurts

(Here I go again, my turn to do some ramming.)
Ooh love hurts

(Ram, ram, ram.)

Some fools think
Of happiness, blissfulness, togetherness

(I have heard that this is apparently what love actually is, but that is plain nonsense because I know better and I know everything even though I pretend to be all humble by only knowing a thing or two.)

Some fools fool themselves, I guess

(Contempt, Superiority)
They’re not foolin’ me

(I know it all.)

I know it isn’t true I know it isn’t true
Love is just a lie made to make you blue

(Pity Play for me, Justification to you)

(And now for some repetitive ram just so you grasp that I am in agony so you need to feel sorry for me and that your own agony is just part of being in love, so suck it up buttercup.)
Love hurts
Ooh love hurts
Ooh love hurts

I know it isn’t true
I know it isn’t true
Love is just a lie made to make you blue
Love hurts
Ooh love hurts
Ooh, love hurts, ooh

 

 

 

 

 

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