The Narcissist´s Need For the Constant Companion

24 thoughts on “The Narcissist´s Need For the Constant Companion

  1. Asp Emp says:

    Thank you for doing this video, HG, it was insightful which aids and furthers my understanding into the dynamics of narcissism.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You are welcome.

  2. Auti says:


    Is the need for constant companion a reason to video, audio tape the IPPS, when the Narcissist is not home?
    If so, what type of Narcissist does this? And why?

    Thank you in advange.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Can you be clearer about what you are referring to. Do you mean the IPPS knows they are being recorded by the narcissist, say through a Skype call with the narcissist when the narcissist is away or do you mean that the narcissist is recording the IPPS with say surveillance cameras whilst he is away?

      1. Auti says:

        I mean surveillance cameras and audio recording whilst he is away, and without letting the IPPS know, she is being recorderd.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Assertion of control.

          1. Auti says:

            Aha, thank you.

          2. HG Tudor says:

            You are welcome.

  3. WhoCares says:

    Excellent video HG.

    Regarding the trait acquisition that occurs with the constant IPPS, are these traits maintained beyond the life of the formal relationship with the IPPS that they were acquired from? Do these skills and traits remain in the narcissist’s repertoire and will he or she draw upon them in future with subsequent IPPS’s? Or are those traits mostly abandoned, once a new IPPS is established (and therefore, new traits are available to draw upon)?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      They can sometimes be retained, although more usually they are disengaged also because they are associated with the malfunctioned former IPPS.

      1. WhoCares says:

        Thank-you HG. That is interesting.
        A recent (handmade) gift to my son from his father made me curious as well, since the skill involved was one that he had picked up during our time together. But he could have just kept the item from back then and not necessarily be engaging that skill again.
        But I find that interesting that they may disengage with a particular skill or pursuit because they associate it with the former IPPS.

        1. Truthseeker6157 says:

          This surprises me too Who Cares but partially answers another question.
          Particularly in relation to the Greater narcissist whose levels of cognitive empathy are almost indistinguishable from genuine emotional empathy, I couldn’t really wrap my head around the trait acquisition side. You mastered your disguise, you are practically undetectable, so what do you need us for, apart from fuel? They likely already have a broader range of skills than many of us have. If there is something specific, status, contacts etc, those remain relevant.

          In my mind, observing us to mimic us, cherry pick skills from us and become more adept at the game of perceived empathy didn’t seem all that relevant to the Greater. If they tend to ‘drop’ these skills and character traits then this might make more sense to me. If they need to constantly witness emotional output in order to accurately portray it, that might make sense too. Tougher to remember an expression for something you don’t actually feel.

          1. WhoCares says:


            Those are interesting thoughts and observations regarding the Greater narcississt and trait acquisition.
            I am reminded of a recent video – but the name escape me – regarding – where HG talks about the range of emotional options, like on a carousel, that are available to various schools of narcississt – at least with regard to emotional responses and – of course the options available to the Greater and/or Ultra are more extensive. And there are some that are acquired but never put into use…wish I could remember what video!

            I asked HG a follow up question after his answer above with specific regard to trait acquisition and the Greater/Ultra category. Perhaps, when he has time to answer it, HG will shed some light on it for both of us.

          2. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Who Cares,

            The 404 narcissist?

            I’m wondering if it’s something along the lines of the fact that whilst with the IPPS certain of her phrases are adopted for example, catchphrases, accent even, particular diet she might subscribe to. The narcissist adopts her views, uses her catchphrase himself, even picks up a slight accent. He adopts them as it draws her in but enables him to fit seamlessly with her friends family and work colleagues. He disengages and has no need to retain the accent, drops her speech pattern and catchphrases etc. No longer remains vegan because he didn’t fully subscribe to it anyway. Moves on, adopts new traits.

            I still struggle with the specific need for character traits and residual benefits on the part of the Greater. They can pay for most of the residual benefits and move in similar circles so shouldn’t need to constantly reinvent or seek traits per se, other than to slide more quickly into the life of the IPPS. They need constant emotional traits perhaps. The need to witness regularly to copy. Like losing your ability to speak a foreign language if you don’t use it regularly. I can appreciate traits relating to contacts, social status, social circle would be a constant necessity but not really much more than that.

          3. Another Cat says:

            Spot on, Truthseeker

            Especially the female greater is often mistaken for an empath, as HG has expressed, if I recall correctly.

            “Particularly in relation to the Greater narcissist whose levels of cognitive empathy are almost indistinguishable from genuine emotional empathy”

            I remember when I had some friends over a couple of Christmases ago. One of the guests, whom I was convinced is a very kind warm person, in a conversation, sort of, made some of us remember how to not be tonedeaf towards vaccine skeptics. She gave a very short eloquent reminder. (She is a quite famous journalist and uni professor)

            While very elegantly dressed, she expressed something humble, like “Oh, well….I think….it’s the notion of … having some new unknown substance being put into your body… I understand that that might frighten….”

            We quickly levelled up.

          4. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Another Cat,

            It is quite remarkable isn’t it? Humility is difficult to express naturally so that it’s convincing. Humility just is. You can hear people say the words but the emotional stamp screams ‘fake!’ So for this narcissist to deliver convincingly illustrates just how good they are. I’d love to be in the company of a Greater myself. To watch the slight shifts in body language, listen to the inflection and more so, find out what they feel like!

            I’ve seen Upper Mid Range in action, (now that I look back I can see it) and the online Narc was Middle Mid Range, vastly different in approach. I don’t believe I have ever met a Greater.

          5. NarcAngel says:

            I imagine the larger the character trait acquisition bank, the more opportunity presents for a Greater to slide seamlessly into any circle undetected. It’s a large part of their currency, and like money, you may not spend it all in one place and save some for a rainy day. Surely a boon for some of the greatest narcissist actors, leaders of industry, and even politics. All circles in which I imagine you would likely find a Greater.

      2. WhoCares says:

        A further question…do Greaters, or the Ultra, better retain skills and traits acquired? Or are they subject to the same outcome?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          We are better able to determine whether the trait should be retained beyond the knee jerk response of Mid Range or Lessers.

      3. Asp Emp says:

        This is interesting yet not surprising. Can I just ask, would a Lesser / MRN also disengage for the same reason (as you explained above) – even of they are doing it instinctively?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          All narcissists disengage for the reasons explained in the article The 5 Disengagement Triggers.

          1. Asp Emp says:

            Ok. Thank you, HG, for the reminder of ‘The 5 Disengagement Triggers’.

  4. jonathan hart says:

    Hi there

    1. NarcAngel says:


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