The Mockery of Mimicry


I love to copy. I have to copy. It is all I have known for as long as I can remember. It is my natural setting to mimic those around me. I have to fit in, I have to belong and the most effective way for me to achieve this is to replicate everything that I come into contact with. If I interact with an esteemed academic I will listen to his or her achievements and then pass those off as my own as I peel away their glittering accolades and apply them to myself.

Should I spend time with an exceptional sporting individual then their record-breaking endeavours will be purloined for my benefit and sported as my own in furtherance of my own belief in my exceptional ability. Author? Yes I have written books too. Model? Yes I do some modelling from time to time. Chef? You should try my signature dish, it is heavenly. Everyone I have dealings with presents me with an opportunity to copy an element of their personality. character or personae so that I may then present it as my own and in so doing I shine brighter and become an even more attractive prospect to those whose lives I effortlessly infiltrate.

This skill at mimicry enables me to ghost in and out of people’s lives. I know the social norms which are applicable and through careful examination and application I am able to pass as one just like you. I am a facsimile of a decent, personable and engaging individual and this allows me access to my targets without raising any alarms. My veneer of respectability has been fashioned from all those that I engage with, gathering patches, fragments, shards and pieces until they are hewn together and I drape it about me allowing me to come and go as I please.

It is however with you that I exhibit the astonishing mimicry of which I am a master. Once I have selected you as my target I have learned much about you already. With what will eventually be recognised as alarming ease, I replicate a fondness for all those things which you like and a distaste for all those things that you dislike.

Think back and you will readily recall how I love horse-riding just as you did, that I enjoyed swimming in open water just like you and my passion for the works of Geoffrey Chaucer matched yours. Those interests which were close to you became interests that were close to me.

Your appreciation of an excellent bottle of Chateau Margaux was matched by my ability to remember the applicable tasting notes and recite them to you as if it was my own appreciation. I would mimic the way you sat, copying your body language because I know, from extensive practice that this paves the way to bonding with you. I would mimic your speech patterns to form a sub-conscious link between us.

I liked blue because you liked blue. I found listening to soul music an offence to my ears but I maintained a false enjoyment of it since you liked it so much. I actually enjoy choosing from the Crustacea bar but your dislike of seafood meant that I too turned lobster and oysters away. How often did you remark aloud, to me or to your friends,

“We have so much in common.”

“We like so many of the same things it is wonderful.”

“We share so many interests, I love it.”

“We are so well matched. On every level. We really are soulmates.”

Of course we are. I made it so because I wanted to be everything you wanted. I took your  long list of likes and dislikes, your catalogue of loves and hates and your grimoire of hopes and fears and I copied each and every page. I am a walking photocopier and I copied everything you wanted in order to ensure that my seduction of you was successful, encompassing and absolute.

Yet, my astonishing powers of mimicry did not end there. Goodness me no, there was more yet to come. In a particularly unpleasant twist to this malevolent skill of mine I would mimic your responses to my devaluation of you but this time it would not be a complete facsimile, I would make a slight change to my copying so that you would be undermined even further.

When you stood there crying with frustration and I drank deep of the delicious fuel you provided me, I would raise my hands to my eyes and draw pretend tears on my cheeks and make a sobbing noise to humiliate you further. Here I was letting you know that I copied everything that went before yet now I copy again but not with the perfection I once exhibited.

I allow the sting of sarcasm and the malicious mockery to infiltrate my copying of your behaviour so that your hurt and bewilderment was increased. You would shout at me and I would shout back using the exact words before standing and laughing at you as you burned with frustration, unable to find any response. You might stamp your feet in exasperation and I would do the same but with a leer of disdain writ large across my face.

There were times when you would scream. A terrified scream as my vicious manipulations would take their toll and as you tried to curl into a ball and hope you might just disappear and escape this nightmare, I would lean in close to you and mimic your scream into your ear, creating this fabricated falsetto of distress in order to further your own. Every reaction to my devaluation of you had the potential to be met by a mimicked reply from me in order to further your misery and demonstrate I did not treat your responses with any sincerity or concern.

I am the master of mimicry, the king of copying and the duke of duplication.

I am a walking and talking photocopier machine.

I put the rank in Rank Xerox.

5 thoughts on “The Mockery of Mimicry

  1. Poison says:

    That’s at least the third reference to a narcissist abusing their victim by screaming into the victim’s ear that I’ve come across in as many weeks. I hope never to experience it. How painful and unsettling it would be.

  2. ava101 says:

    is it possible that a (upper) mid range narc is kinda intelligent and plans a lot – – but is a bit… stupid when it comes to long term thinking? Can’t predict what will be the outcome after the next 3 steps?

    To me, that’s a contradiction… but the concept of ’cause and effect’ seems to be alien to a narc I had considered smart enough in the past.

    It seems to be a problem with a lot of people, but most don’t spend days making detailed plans in the first place.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I think saying stupid might be pushing it (that may just be a language issue) but the UMR engages in Instinctive Planning but could still make decisions which have poor outcomes beyond the immediate future.

      1. ava101 says:

        Maybe not stupid but not weighing all aspects of long term outcomes. 😉

        But so I’m not wrong that a plan of an umn could satisfy immediate dwsires, regardless of later consequences.

        BTW my mother narc – – it simply doesn’t cross her mind what the effect on her children could have been of her stealing our inheritance. It simply seems to totally invade her that getting the money wouldn’t guarantee her decades of perfect as there are other consequences.

  3. Asp Emp says:

    HG’s words (partial comment) in an older thread of this article: “If there is an empath in the mix it is first come first served, there is no honour amongst us, there is no line-up but survival of the most narcissistic”.


    OMG. I remembered such an incident – 2 Lessers, shouting at each other. Males (similar in age). In front of me. The shouting was heard by other people but they were not in the room. I was just an observer. Both were asserting their control on each other. It was something to do with some fuck-up that one was responsible for but was arguing his way out. Looking back, they were both different sub-schools. One was top boss (lower echelon of the two). The other was a boss but not the top boss. This happened more than once. The top boss “backed down” by stomping off (as usual). At that time, there was 5 employees. I am the only female. The only empath. Wow. All those fu*ken Lessers (ok, maybe one was more of the ‘overwhelming angel’ of a MRN). Yet that guy was treated like shit by the other narcissistics. Those 4 guys shouted more than anyone else did, yes, even more than me.

    Why did I not ‘behave’ like them? I used evidence, if an arrangement is made and it is computerised and the invoice, the book-keeping etc shows the paper-trail, fact, on fact, on fact. Then, only then, they’d pick on each other and start the shouting. Again.

    Alas, I did not have the authority (at the time) to sack them all for the number of fuck-ups they did, costing company time, wasting resources, etc.

    The hypocrisy of the whole fu*ken mess? I was one of the lowest paid. And I was the only one that did not get the settlement pay-out as agreed. Fkg wankers.

    It almost, just almost, came to that (RE: sacking via proper methods as per procedures, evidence, etc) to two of them in any case. Then that fu*ken son-in-law was brought in…… I am ok as I type this, not angry, not sad (fk that!), not in the least fkg bothered.

    I do not even feel smug, nor satisfaction, I am just calm. I am me. At the same time, I just get stronger, each day, with more reading and more learning.

    Thank you, HG. For your work, time, education, entertainment, expertise, unwavering focus on maintaining, building and delivering your Legacy. Thank you for being you.

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