Lucy Letby : Why Did She Kill?

23 thoughts on “Lucy Letby : Why Did She Kill?

  1. Grace says:

    Thanks HG. Regarding Lucy
    I know of a narcissist that was raped at 3yrs old that believed that she could never have a child. She came from a culture where men mostly want children in marriage. She tied her self worth to the fact that no man will marry her, or will divorce her when she bares no child in her marriage. Therefore she felt worthless. She became evil and hateful of men and children. Could Lucy have had a traumatic event that brings flashback that she couldn’t be married or have babies. She seems to have that fixed delusions and sure of that to have carried out that heinous crime. Being an npd and Having one relationship and so young shouldn’t convince her that much that she will never be married or have babies except if she has delusional disorder. Or maybe she has a diagnosis and self aware of her kind. I know of a bpd that vow never to have children so as not to pass the narcissism onward.
    2. Also she was a miracle baby, almost died at childbirth. Why did she choose saving babies in distress or dying at childbirth as a career?
    She went to nursing school like 18yrs and chose paediatric … working with high risk, about to die @ birth babies. There are many speciality in nursing, and she wanted to deal with high risk dying babies? And was bored ( emptiness) when the babies were not sick enough… meaning not enough npd fuel. Could she wish secretly that she had died at birth and thought she is helping the children by playing God and by killing them? since she believes that she is kind. As an npd, could she be so miserable in her heart that it fuels her up feeling that she is doing the children a favour by releasing them from this miserable world and then enjoying the deception of hiding it. The psychopathic and sadism traits must come from horrible trauma or genetic predisposition. With the said ‘loving controlling ways her parents raised her, she would be more of a grandiose npd but the sadistic and psychopathic trait came from somewhere. Killing a vulnerable baby is deep horrific fuel and ways to control, even if you are an npd. There is sure more hatred or delusional helping of babies out of misery” or enjoying sadism and psychopathy fuel in her thoughts that we know little about the origin of the trait due to the information about he upbringing. The trauma could be from her parents or outsiders that they know nothing about. To kill tertiary people, outsider is deep unusual fuel for an npd, the sadism and psychopathic trait has to come from some trauma or genetics for her to be able to function afterwards. It is in response to a Calculative vengeful response even though it gained the attention of her lover and controlled her environment. The root of the choice of the sadistic and psychopathic fuel and her being at peace with the choice has a or some missing pieces.

  2. Contagious says:

    There are two other serial killers I found who had no evidence of prior problematic behaviors such as violence or crimes or law breaking like Lucy letby. The BTK killer and Rigway who killed 47 women.

  3. Dani says:

    Mr. Tudor–

    Even only partially released, this has been a disturbing analysis, as all the criminal ones have been. (I’ve especially found the corrupt police officers to be loathsome and disgusting individuals, too.) I hadn’t heard about this murderer until your first video about her.

    I’m interested in seeing where she falls within your framework, and completely repelled by the actions she took that helped you determine this.

    I’d love to learn more about how you (personally), if you’ve met people like her in person who seem so biege, how you quickly determine what they are. To me…it’s amazing how you do that.

    Thank you so much for time in doing this analysis, and I’m looking forward to the next one….looks like it will be Zelensky by a very narrow margin, but Diana, Princess of Wales, has gone up a percentage point…so who knows…it all depends on when the Glorious Narrator decides to conclude the polling process.

  4. annaamel says:

    I find this story so emotionally affecting that thinking about it for any length of time makes me feel physically dizzy. I can’t learn anything about it because it’s too difficult to think about.

    1. Contagious says:

      Annamel: I have had dreams effected by this where the planet ends and me and my loved ones must escape as evil has overtaken the world. I awake escaping heart pumping. My dreams are like full length movies. There are two things that hit home… on paper I am no more or maybe more interesting than her. ( but my bet is the parents know she is not right which is why they Hoover and protect her throughout life… liars!!!) and I don’t kill. Then, the more important second, the lives she’s taken. I think babies shoe God has not given up hope to the world. And she stole that life. She stole her parents lives and Gods hope. Just evil. Hits me to the very core. HGs analysis is brilliant and based on evidence. My instinct doesn’t rely on evidence. I think her parents knew.Her life seems too scrubbed clean almost premeditated. Not one indisgression before the murders? No, I don’t believe it. Mommy and daddy knew and daily worked on her. They knew who she was and hid it. So she was vigilant. My gut screams psychopath at birth but also a narcissist. Both. Evidence of both. But the lack of evidence tells us too. She loved Snow White. There were 7 dwarfs. 7 seven. 7 killed that we know of. She was pure. Pure as snow. The huntsman ( married doctor) could not kill her. Now this fable doesn’t involve killing babies. But Snow White was a victim. Look around your home, it is a reflection of you. I have a mural of the church of Ezetergom cathedral that I sit under, books many on art, music , candles, flowers, crosses and religious items throughout each room. Photos of my children and other loved ones and y s dog beds and toys. I don’t preach my deepest thoughts but look at my home. Look at hers. Pure as snow. Right? Not one wrongdoing? That her parents didn’t tell. Lucy’s journals and behaviors show someone without empathy. Smile and party after killing a baby. ? Her comments make no sense as if she doesn’t get others. No, I think she is a narcissistic psychopath. Both. Verdict: May she be disconnected and put into the dark holes of the universe, made nothing, no light in her. Only the mirror mirror on the wall of darkness eternal nothingness where she belongs. An aberration of nature or of evil.

  5. Alexissmith2016 says:

    HG, is it even a possibility that the doctor Lucy Letby was having an emotional affair with the real killer? Just seems odd that he was also always around?

  6. Alexissmith2016 says:

    So pleased you’re covering this one HG. It’s absolutely awful what she had done but the scariest part being, to me at least, she looks so normal and friendly. Of course I’ve only seen still images of her so you can’t always tell but most serial killers have a look about them, even Ted Bundy. Many Ns who are not necessarily Ps also have a ‘look’ and are easy to spot, e.g. Ryan giggs springs to mind. But with Lucy Letby it is hard for my brain to reconcile her face with that of an N/P let alone a serial killer. So fascinated by your series, just about to listen to some more. I hope you cover what she thought in terms of continuing to get away with it and did she believe she’d get caught? I can’t understand this at all? As it became obvious? Why not move to another hospital?? Same as the P (I forget his name) who was portrayed in the sixth commandment? Why select a neighbour of the first victim to be a second victim? Is this due to intelligence levels or simply their belief that they’re more clever than everyone else? It makes no sense? When a criminal blatantly fucks up, people say either they became complacent – I get that, but some say they want to get caught? Really? Do they ever? For fuel? So people can see how ‘clever’ they are?

  7. Anna says:

    Thanks for this analysis HG
    It scares and shocks me to the core what this woman did.
    I agree with the others above. She is indeed a psychopath.

  8. Sweetest Perfection says:

    After walking my dogs (a time when I use to ponder about life, occasionally interrupted by the inevitable in this situation) a thought came to my mind: did she in fact feel the same despondency and aversion towards humanity, and by extension, the current world? Did she act this way motivated by her childhood trauma and, in a grandiose, god-like act, decided to spare the future suffering of these little babies? Was she convinced that she was the necessary evil for a greater purpose (Machiavellianism)?

    1. lickemtomorrow says:

      SP, interesting to read your thoughts. Thank you for sharing. Plenty of room for HG’s analysis to consider all the possibilities.

      1. Sweetest Perfection says:

        Thank you lickemtomorrow. I am following HG’s YT analysis and this is such a complicated case. It all looks at first like a gigantic knot until he starts untangling it and suddenly oh wow! It’s similar to when you receive the NDC analysis and realize the amount of information he pulls out from the little questionnaire you filled. And you wonder how did he even? How didn’t I see that? I will continue to listen and let’s see what we get but it’s definitely difficult.

        1. lickemtomorrow says:

          SP, I’m finally up to date with the analysis and find it fascinating. There are so many possibilities that in turn could lead to so many outcomes. Enjoyed reading your further comment which provides a good explanation of how what seems like a giant knot is being untangled for further understanding, and the ability to breakdown the various elements so thoroughly can lead to some startling conclusions. I’ve put on a more ‘clinical’ mindset in order to listen to this knowing she has now been sentenced to life in prison. Until I heard the outcome of the trial, every aspect would have been to difficult for me to hear.

    2. Witch says:


      Maybe she was taking out her hatred of her parents onto them because she couldn’t bring herself to act on her actual parents since she felt she still needed them for facade management etc
      I’m sure there are times when a narc is pissed off with one person they redirect that rage onto someone else.
      Her parents wanted her to be perfect and acted like she was, maybe she also wanted them to still think she was perfect but at the same time it threatened her sense of control so she created a dirty secret, a place where she wasn’t “perfect sweet nurse Letby,” to her parents, she was her true self.
      I also think envy was involved since there was no husband

  9. Sweetest Perfection says:

    This case is one of the reasons why I wonder what the fuck I am doing in this world. Most days I am optimistic; I believe everyone is good, people make mistakes, love is the answer… and then comes a shitty excuse of a human like this one and makes me despise my own nature. When HG wrote “Humanity” I confess I read it as an exercise on misanthropy that came from grandiosity. I now feel that same despite for humanity, albeit, from the resignation that, as much repulsion as I feel, this monster and I share the same DNA sequence. I’d rather be a worm.

    1. Truthseeker6157 says:

      I know SP. I’m similar. On the one hand I feel absolutely drained and disillusioned by the state of todays world. On the other I insist on reading about it, examining it and asking myself how we got here.

      We do share the same DNA. Humankind is capable of truly horrific behaviour and in some ways the only thing that takes the edge of my disillusionment is to understand more about the ‘why’, This way I can at least kind of reconcile events in my own mind, separate them out, it doesn’t become such a huge glut of nastiness.

      I wondered about Letby’s writing. The notes they found where she had written that she wasn’t good enough, would never have a family of her own, that she was evil. It made me wonder if this wasn’t the voice of the creature, admonishing her. It made me wonder whether those notes were written evidence of a fuel crisis. The creature fighting to break through the construct that was Lucy Letby.

      I don’t know if she only began murdering those innocent babies once she had moved away from her parents home. I think that might be the case. It almost appears as if she was running low on fuel repeatedly because the primary fuel source was her parents. She killed a few hours after a hen party, she killed a few hours after coming back from Ibiza. Strange, because you would think there would be more fuel at these times, but there was still no primary on these occasions, communication with her parents would fall as would their fuel. She also described the team she worked with as ‘her family’. Would regarding work colleagues as family increase their fuel potency? In that case the drama of the killings would give access to higher potency fuel faster than it would if colleagues were not seen as family perhaps? They would be higher on her fuel matrix.

      When I look at it like this, Letby seemingly desperate for fuel, it almost appears that she was “suffering from narcissism”. We don’t usually think of it like that. I don’t care that she was suffering from it, if she even was, there are no excuses that exist for what she did, none, but like you, I’m going through my daily tasks and turning it over in my mind. I want to stop doing that.

      I think understanding this more fully will help to reconcile what Letby did, but the thought of those families, the losses they suffered, the re living of those losses over and over, I can’t easily get that out of my head at all. Anything with children or animals I really struggle with. It’s because they are so innocent, so clearly undeserving of cruel treatment that I absolutely don’t have it in me to forgive in any way, so my only option is to understand.

      I feel similarly, how did humanity end up like this?

      1. Sweetest Perfection says:

        Well, TS, spiritually I have learned this is the way the world is, and it is fine the way it is as we are here to learn and progress. Emotionally, it is inconceivable. There is a big case going on now about a Spanish young man, the son of a famous Spanish actor, who killed his male lover in Thailand, a prestigious cosmetic surgeon from Colombia. He chopped his body in 14 pieces and spread them in different parts of the island in plastic bags. The case is full of mystery (for example, the murderer had a long-time girlfriend back in Spain that he was planning to marry, he received a monthly payment from his lover, his lover was planning to move with him in Barcelona…). But what surprised me the most is that right after killing him, he was seen dancing and playing in a swimming pool. And then he told the media that he was calmed, that he only wanted to know if he was receiving enough media coverage, and added that he would consider being interviewed in a show.
        I don’t know if he was oblivious of what a jail in Thailand meant, or what, but that behavior screams of psychopathy to me.
        On the other hand it has been alarming how the Spanish media treated the case by worrying too much about his well being and how to find a way to extradite him instead of expressing any concern for the victim’s family. The world is definitely a cruel place.

        1. truthseeker6157 says:

          Hi SP,

          I hadn’t heard of that case you spoke about. It sounds like compartmentalisation, like the killer was leading a double life. When you mentioned him dancing in a swimming pool directly after the murder it beggars belief doesn’t it? We can’t conceive of anyone actually being able to switch off from something so gruesome let alone have a merry old time straight after. I suppose that’s what lack of emotional empathy actually is, he felt no different disposing of those body parts than he would taking the trash out.

          I don’t know if it screams psychopathy or it just screams lack of emotional empathy. Absence is absence ; the narcissist and psychopath are indistinguishable in that respect, though his need for media coverage smacks of a need for fuel and control.

          I think because we have experienced narcissism and are here to tell the tale, we perhaps see narcissism as the lesser of the two evils between narcissism and psychopathy. It’s tough to fully appreciate what lack of emotional empathy actually means, in terms of what a person might be capable of. Technically both groups could be capable of that crime. Look at Gabby Petito. Laundrie was able to come back after killing her and talk normally about his trip! Similar to dancing in a pool, no conscience, no remorse.

          A cruel place indeed. A house on a hill (with a moat and gun turret) just me, a few dogs and a donkey is looking more attractive by the day.


  10. lickemtomorrow says:

    Looking forward to this analysis. I couldn’t bring myself to read about the court case or listen to the detailed podcasts because it’s just too heartbreaking. The thought that babies who should have survived were condemned to die by someone meant to be caring for them. Poor innocent children. Poor devastated parents. Disgraceful hospital management who overlooked the crimes occurring right under their noses. Consultants raised red flags early on and were ignored … bravo to those astute members of the medical profession who sought to bring an end to this unnecessary suffering.

    I held my breath during the lengthy jury deliberations, afraid that somehow she would get off on the charges that had been laid. Thankfully, the detectives were thorough and disciplined, which must take enormous psychological and emotional resources to remain stoic and focused on the task at hand. They ensured the least amount of wriggle room for this killer to be released.

    I believe Letby is a Psychopath. She was born that way. She will die that way in prison.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you for your response LET.

      1. lickemtomorrow says:

        You are welcome, HG. I have strong feelings on this one, though your analysis will prove the final outcome. Many ideas being bandied about, but not many resting on pure psychopath. She showed her contempt today by refusing to sit in the dock for sentencing. She has no remorse. No empathy. Those poor suffering parents. Her own showed their contempt as well. Showing up in Court every other day, but today.

        1. In so many words says:

          lickemtomorrow, I agree with you. I think she is a pure psychopath, with a sadistic streak. I thought so when I heard the introduction. I am in the US, and first heard about the case on HG’s channel. She seemed to show no fear, and did not seem much interested in fuel. Even if she had a conviction about why she was helping society, she seemed to be doing killing for control and thrill.

          1. lickemtomorrow says:

            Hi, In So Many Words.

            The sentencing Judge mentioned an element of sadism aligned with malevolence in his summing up which also had my ears prick up. From what I understand these can also be associated with narcissism, but it’s an indication an underlying personality disorder accounts for her actions.

            It seems to me she was a well hidden predator, lacking the often obvious red flags of the narcissist, which is why I’m leaning more towards psychopath. I sense an emptiness about her that leads me in that direction as well. It was mentioned she appeared to experience a “thrill” at some of the consequences of her actions, causing me to think she was finding ways to counter her emptiness and boredom with the distress she caused. It was a game to her, and any feelings she shared in relation to that were outed as lies.

            That she callously refuse to appear for the sentencing of victim impact statements tells me she wasn’t a “coward” as much as she was contemptuous. She had contempt for those parents, their suffering, their dead children. Where was her show of empathy for any of that during the trial? Her only show of tears was when her Consultant “boyfriend” appeared on the stand to testify against her, so that was Letby feeling sorry for herself.

            She was described as “playing God”, which seems very much aligned with a psychopathic mindset.

            Justice, in as much as it is possible to be done in the circumstances, has now been done. She will never get out of prison.

            Looking forward to HG’s breakdown of this killer nurse.

          2. In so many words says:

            I could not commit the time to listen to the whole series (couldn’t resist the 20 Narcissist Who F**d Up), but listened to a couple of episodes. I will change my guess to narcissistic psychopath, as she did seem to need fuel, but less of it than a pure narcissist. Or what psychologists call the dark tetrad (narcissism, psychopathy, sadism, machiavellism). But fortunately she was not good enough at machiavellism to not get caught.

Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.