The Mourning of a Neglectful Love
I sit at my kitchen table, the same one where we used to share hurried breakfasts and late-night confessions, now staring at the empty chair across from me. The silence is deafening, not because the room is quiet, but because it lacks the familiar cadence of his voice, his laughter, even his indifference. Five years. Five years of weaving a life together, thread by fragile thread, only for him to pull the final stitch and let the entire tapestry unravel. He is gone, and I am left bewildered, grappling with a grief that feels both profound and perverse, mourning a man who, by all accounts, did not deserve my tears. Yet here I am, drowning in them, while he—seemingly unburdened—has already woven a new thread with someone else, as if our shared history was but a fleeting sketch, easily erased.
The confusion is a fog that clings to me, disorienting and dense. How does one mourn the loss of something that was, in truth, a source of pain? He was not cruel in the cinematic sense—no grand betrayals or dramatic confrontations—but his neglect was a slow poison, seeping into the crevices of our relationship until it eroded the foundation. He forgot birthdays, dismissed my ambitions with a wave of his hand, and let days pass without so much as a glance in my direction. I was a ghost in my own love story, haunting the edges of his life, begging for scraps of affection. And yet, the moment he walked out the door, I felt as though the ground beneath me had given way. Why do I grieve for a man who treated me as an afterthought? Why does my heart ache for someone who has already found solace in another’s arms?
The paradox of my mourning lies in the dissonance between what was and what I wanted it to be. For five years, I clung to the potential of us. I saw the man he could have been—the one who, in rare moments, would look at me with a tenderness that made my chest tighten, or who would laugh with me until we were breathless. Those moments were fleeting, like stars obscured by clouds, but they were enough to keep me tethered to hope. I built castles in the air, furnishing them with dreams of a future where he would finally see me, truly see me, and love me as fiercely as I loved him. But those castles were illusions, and now that he is gone, I am left to wander their ruins, grieving not just the man, but the fantasy I constructed around him.
The news of his new relationship came like a blade, swift and sharp. A mutual friend, perhaps unaware of the weight of her words, mentioned it casually, as if it were inconsequential: “Oh, didn’t you hear? He’s with someone new already.” Already. The word echoed in my mind, a cruel reminder of how seamlessly he had moved on. Weeks after our breakup, he had found someone else, someone to fill the space I had occupied for half a decade. I imagined him laughing with her, sharing the same stories he once told me, his hand resting on hers in a way it rarely did with mine. The image burned, not because I begrudged him happiness, but because it exposed the asymmetry of our loss. I was still sifting through the wreckage of our relationship, while he had already built a new home.
This disparity gnaws at me, fueling my confusion. How could he move on so effortlessly? Did our five years mean so little that he could replace me without pause? I replay our final conversation, searching for clues, but it was unremarkable, almost clinical. He said he needed space, that he wasn’t sure who he was anymore. I nodded, numb, believing it was a temporary fracture, a moment of doubt we could mend. But there was no mending. He packed his belongings, left his key on the counter, and walked out, leaving me to grapple with a void that felt both sudden and inevitable. Now, I wonder if he was already planning his escape, if his heart had already turned toward someone new while I was still clinging to the ghost of us.
The loss is not just of him, but of the version of myself I became in his presence. I was the optimist, the forgiver, the one who believed love could endure anything. I bent myself to fit his silences, his absences, his indifference, convincing myself that my patience would eventually be rewarded. I diminished my own light to make room for his shadows, and now that he is gone, I am left to confront the parts of myself I sacrificed. Who am I without the weight of his neglect? Who am I without the hope that kept me tethered to him? The mirror reflects a stranger, and I mourn her too—the woman who loved so fiercely, so foolishly, that she lost sight of her own worth.
The sensation of loss is visceral, a heaviness that settles in my chest and lingers through the mundane moments of my day. I wake up reaching for him, only to find the cold expanse of an empty bed. I cook dinner for one, the act feeling both defiant and hollow. I walk past the park where we used to sit, and the benches seem to mock me with their emptiness. These small, everyday losses compound the larger one, each a reminder that he is no longer part of my world. And yet, the irony is that even when he was here, he was never truly present. His neglect was a kind of absence, a withholding of the intimacy I craved. So why does his physical absence hurt so much more?
Part of the answer lies in the stories we tell ourselves about love. I grew up believing that love was a force of redemption, that it could heal wounds and bridge divides. I poured myself into our relationship with the fervor of a zealot, believing that my devotion could transform him into the partner I needed. But love, I have learned, is not a magic wand. It cannot change someone who does not wish to change, nor can it fill the gaps left by their indifference. My grief is not just for him, but for the collapse of that narrative, the realization that love alone was not enough to save us.
The knowledge of his new relationship adds another layer to my mourning, a bitter edge that I cannot shake. I find myself scrolling through social media, searching for glimpses of his new life, even though each discovery is a fresh wound. I see a photo of him with her, their smiles radiant, and I am struck by how unfamiliar he looks—happy in a way he rarely was with me. I wonder if he was always capable of that happiness, if it was only with me that he withheld it. The thought is a dagger, twisting deeper with each question: Was I not enough? Did I ask for too much? Or was it simply that I was not her?
These questions are futile, I know, but they haunt me nonetheless. They are the residue of a relationship that left me doubting my own value. His neglect was not a reflection of my worth, but it felt like it, and that feeling lingers like a bruise. I mourn the time I spent trying to prove myself to someone who was never truly looking. I mourn the energy I poured into a love that was never reciprocated in kind and I mourn the illusion of security, the belief that five years meant we were unbreakable, when in truth, we were always one step away from collapse.
Yet, even in the midst of this grief, there is a strange clarity emerging. The fog of confusion is beginning to lift, revealing truths I could not see while I was still in his orbit. I am starting to recognize the ways in which I betrayed myself, compromising my needs to keep him close. I am beginning to understand that my mourning is not just for him, but for the parts of myself I lost in the process of loving him. This realization is both painful and liberating, a step toward reclaiming the woman I was before I let his neglect define me.
The process of grieving is not linear; it is a labyrinth, full of twists and dead ends. Some days, I am consumed by anger—at him for his indifference, at myself for my complicity. Other days, I am overwhelmed by sadness, the weight of what could have been pressing against my ribs. Then there are moments of unexpected lightness, when I catch a glimpse of a future unencumbered by his shadow. These moments are fleeting, but they are enough to remind me that I am still here, still capable of building a life that is mine alone.
I think often of the metaphor of a tapestry, not just because it captures the fragility of our relationship, but because it speaks to the possibility of repair. A tapestry can be mended, its threads rewoven into something new, something stronger. I am not there yet, but I am beginning to gather the threads of myself, to stitch together a new pattern. It will take time, and there will be days when the weight of his absence feels unbearable. I am learning to sit with the grief, to let it wash over me without drowning. I am learning to mourn not just the man who left, but the illusions I held onto, and in doing so, I am making space for something real—something that belongs to me.
As I write this, I am still bewildered, still confused by the depth of my loss for someone who treated me so poorly. But I am also beginning to see that this grief is not a betrayal of myself, but a testament to the depth of my capacity to love. I loved him, flaws and all, and that love was not wasted, even if it was not returned in kind. It is a part of my story, a chapter that has ended but does not define the whole. He may have moved on seamlessly, but I am still here, piecing myself back together, thread by thread. In that slow, deliberate work, I am finding something I had lost sight of: myself.
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“myself” (at ending of this story).
How many of us have also been “lost” in the midst of ensnarements, narcissistic abuse over the years until they find a way out. Your work was the answer I needed, your work explained it in the way I needed.
Excellent article.
Thank you for writing it.
You are welcome.
There is definitely a greater depth to your writing HG. It’s evident in The Empath in the Narcissist’s Silent Grip, Chained to the Narcissist’s Memory, and again here.
I think you have attained a new level of understanding as regards the empath. Your cognitive empathy has broadened to accommodate, to the point where to all intents and purposes you appear to view us (the empaths) as people, whole beings, as opposed to objects. That’s the difference I was struggling to put my finger on. You now write us as people, rather than targets, suppliers or prey. There is an added dimension to your portrayal of us.
Logically, I think you still view us via the lenses of utility and fuel. We are still prey. You remain the predator. In your writing though, when the process is creative and you are using the conscious and subconscious parts of your mind in unison, I think you are beginning to view us slightly differently. Whatever that difference is, it’s showing itself through your writing.
My reasoning might be flawed, but my observation is not. There is definitely a noticeable change in your writing.
I wonder what is driving the change? Experience? A certainty surrounding future plans? Greater stability within your romantic relationship perhaps? Enhanced understanding? A developing acceptance? There’s stability involved somewhere I think.
I sound like a tarot card reader now. I’m off.
I agree TS, it’s like HG is in our heads now and can see through our eyes, a subtle change in HG, but notable. Xx
Hi Rebecca,
I’m glad you noticed too. In some ways it could be down to a shift in focus. Clearly, HG’s blog is about narcissism and more recently psychopathy. The articles are therefore narcissist / psychopath focussed as that is what we are here to learn about, the narcissist’s / psychopath’s perspective. There is also much about the empath but until recently, less about viewing the dynamic directly through the eyes of the empath.
This might be part of what makes these recent articles stand out. Possibly. But for me it’s more than that, it’s a deeper understanding and a level of cognitive empathy that is even more precise.
I read this and at the start I thought it had been written by an empath. Paragraph 4 made me realise it was HG, simply because I saw the ‘friend’ as a lieutenant, so there’s a clear teaching element. Otherwise, I think it reads very much as if an empath was speaking.
Impressive, somewhat concerning, fascinating.
Xx
Hi TS,
I completely agree with you, HG’s writings and observations have gotten more keen on our point of view and mindset. I wonder if the blog is the reason for the difference in depth? Xx
Hi Rebecca,
The blog will almost certainly have contributed. I don’t think it’s just the blog comments though. I think blog world as a whole has contributed. From the planning and creation of articles, through to video creation, requests from various sources for additional info plus consultations. I think it’s the way that the knowledge is having to be used so regularly in differing scenarios as well as the input of knowledge itself.
I would estimate though that first hand experience is more impactful in terms of understanding. I suppose I view it a little like qualitative versus quantitative data. You need both to get a clear picture.
Xx
Hi TS,
I think HG is learning from us, as much as we are learning from him! 😄 Remember, there is that transaction with a narcissist…I think we are getting a fair deal. Xx
Hi TS,
Also I think HG learns and absorbs a lot from the consultations with us. Xx
Hi TS,
Mr. Tudor said, “As I’ve explained before, I listen, I watch and I recall. Understanding the behaviour of one’s prey is a form of stimulation and affords a greater degree of efficacy.”
I do agree that he’s evolved. I think what’s changing is he’s become a more effective predator.
On the MK Ultra video, he said he believed that you can get more people to do what you want using benign methods. I think thats what he’s doing here, using a benign method.
Hi Leigh,
By definition I think HG is and will remain a predator. In terms of efficacy, I think often that statement “more effective” makes us twitchy because we instantly relate it to his personal romantic dynamic, or to a malign manipulation. A case of “Is understanding us better making it worse for her / them?” I have had this conversation with myself on more than one occasion.
As a narcissistic psychopath, we know that HG is very capable of causing damage to those in his personal life. He has done so repeatedly.
I look at it a bit like being pregnant. You are or you aren’t. There aren’t degrees of pregnancy, similarly I don’t think HG is more of a predator now than previously. HG could cause damage ten years ago if he chose to. Knowing more ten years later means he can similarly cause damage now if he chooses to. Damage is damage, break one way or break another, still broken. He now just has more options to damage and more options not to damage.
I take the two aspects separately. Predator, yes and always. Effective is applicable to other areas outside of a romantic context. Understanding us better makes him more effective in all arenas. Professionally, personally, educationally, and in terms of one on one consultations.
I don’t see ‘more effective’ as being wholly negative. Like most things, there will be both positive and negative impacts. Where the impacts are negative, my view is those outcomes were always going to be negative anyway. Destroy the old way, or the new way, the end result is still ‘destroyed.’ Where they are positive impacts I think the outcomes might be exponentially more positive, largely thanks to the legacy.
Understanding us better might also mean that threats to control feel less like threats due to enhanced understanding of the motivation of the empath concerned. The threats will likely be equally as numerous but potentially, the need to respond to the threats might be reduced. Fewer assertions of control suggests fewer malign manipulations over all. That benefits HG in terms of energy expenditure, plus it benefits the victim of his manipulations, IPPS or otherwise, particularly if the rate of benign manipulations is increased. It also reduces risk to the facade.
Overall there is potential for a net positive thanks to understanding us better. Admittedly, there is also potential for increased negative outcomes (from our perspective). Same as usual, a lot of that is down to choice and what HG deems to benefit him most in any given situation.
Xx
Hi TS,
I’m not necessarily looking at Mr. Tudor evolving as negative or positive. I think there a lot of positives from him understanding us further. As he learns, we learn as well. When I say he’s more effective, I mean he’s more effective at getting what he requires from people, even us. I need to stay cognizant of that. Since we’re addicted to the narcissist, that means we can be conned by Mr. Tudor as well. With him being able to understand us on a deeper level than we can understand ourselves, would he use that against us? Even if he wouldn’t, he still could. I find that a little unnerving.
“Understanding us better might also mean that threats to control feel less like threats due to enhanced understanding of the motivation of the empath concerned.” He might understand us but that doesn’t mean he’s ok with our actions.. But I do see what you’re saying also. Cognitive empathy could cause less threats to control as well.
Hi TS,
I’m not necessarily looking at Mr. Tudor evolving as negative or positive. I think there a lot of positives from him understanding us further. As he learns, we learn as well. When I say he’s more effective, I mean he’s more effective at getting what he requires from people, even us. I need to stay cognizant of that. Since we’re addicted to the narcissist, that means we can be conned by Mr. Tudor as well. With him being able to understand us on a deeper level than we can understand ourselves, would he use that against us? Even if he wouldn’t, he still could. I find that a little unnerving.
“Understanding us better might also mean that threats to control feel less like threats due to enhanced understanding of the motivation of the empath concerned.” He might understand us but that doesn’t mean he’s ok with our actions.. But I do see what you’re saying also. Cognitive empathy could cause less threats to control as well.
Hi Leigh,
I understand better what you mean now. I think in terms of our professional interactions with HG, detectors, consultations, emails in relation to professional services and purchases, donations to AAF etc, we are perfectly safe. I have utilised all of the above and have found HG to be completely honest and professional. There is no need for anyone to be concerned within this professional context. ( I think you agree here Leigh, just clarifying for any newer arrivals.)
Outside of the professional context, non blog world related, let’s say we ran into HG in a bar, or at an event of some description, I think that would be a different matter. In that context, I don’t think HG would, but he could.
Xx
Hi TS,
Yes, I absolutely agree that its safe to interact with Mr. Tudor in a professional context here in blog world. He’s helped so many people! His work has opened my eyes and given me hope. I’d still be lost if it wasn’t for him. I’m still an appliance though and that means I have to be controlled. So I see it as he’s controlling me by helping me. Which I’m totally ok with because I get something out of the deal too. But he’s using a benign method to control me. If its this easy to control us and we know that he’s a predator, imagine how easy it is for him to control others who don’t know that about him.
These new articles show how much he understands us. I think he uses that understanding to accumulate more appliances, inside and outside of blog world.
Hi Leigh,
Yes I think that’s why it works. Both parties gain. I remember Alexis commenting similarly a while ago about narcs she interacts with in daily life. I’m paraphrasing Alexis here so I hope I get this right, but essentially she stated that she would still help a narcissist just so long as she gets something out of the transaction too. I thought that was fair.
Xx
I don’t think we (here on the blog) are remotely as interesting to HG as we may think ourselves to be. We are largely under control and mostly conform to the roles of our empath classes and traits (Carriers gonna carry, etc) It’s very transactional. Much like an ant farm under glass, we get fed (knowledge) and we do ant shit (socialize and move stuff around). Dependable for viewing all these years later, but given our containment, likely not as interesting as we were in the beginning, and certainly not as stimulating as those in the wild.
Well I don’t know. I just carried this massive gummy bear all the way up here. I thought that was pretty interesting.
Great analogy NA! 🐜 And I think with an (understable and necessary) pinch of caution is probably how it is…
Lol TS 🤣
Great comment, NA.
Amused me about “ant shit”. I did wonder about the size of that…..
Gummy bear 🤣🤣🤣
NarcAngel and TS,
😄😄TS, I’m the ant making new tunnels and spotted a few times licking the glass. 🙃xx
Rebecca,
I know, that’s why I brought the gummy, to stop you licking the glass!
Even as an ant, I am empath.
TS,
The gummy bear definitely drew my attention away from the glass! 😄😄 Thanks, so thoughtful of you! 😄😁xx
Hi all, I agree. I think one of the things I’m learning, is that we are who we are. So an empath can be empowered or disempowered but they’re still an empath etc. For HG, he’ll always be who he is, he is proactive and learning here alongside his legacy, so is becoming more efficient “IRL”. It does explain why therapy doesn’t work with narcissists too but it does give the narcissism a chance to evolve. But I think getting what you want with more benign methods is also more prosocial too. 🤔 Though obviously HG is in the minority being able to shift in this way.
Hi Jade,
I do agree that you get more flies with honey than vinegar. But please see my response to TS. It further explains my concerns.
Thanks for writing this Leigh. This blog is such a weird dynamic with HG being an N, moderating our comments and us discussing him… I appreciate he allows that. Thank you HG.
Its funny you raised this because I was thinking after I wrote it that “more benign” manipulations aren’t necessarily “better”. I’ve dealt with more covert mid ranger type manipulations most of my life and it’s caused a lot of issues, more so I feel because of the hidden nature. I don’t know if I’m conflating more benign with covert.
I know what you mean about unnerving and appreciate you raising it. As you know I felt nervous joining in here but both HG and the lovely commenters like yourself have alayed alot of my fears. However at the same time, HG is what he is, as he constantly teaches us in a myriad of ways and I think it’s a testament to his teachings that we keep that uppermost in our minds. I’m aware I get a bit all or nothing with things and whilst I think for now I’m on a good roll with my learning here, am aware I have to watch that addictive side of me.. it’s what ended me up in a cult! 🤦♀️😅
Thanks again Leigh.. I appreciate your take on this.
Hi Jade,
I struggle sometimes to write these things because I adore Mr. Tudor. But I also know what he is and I need to see him that way.
Like TS said though, any professional interactions with Mr. Tudor within blog world are very safe.
I do think you’re conflating benign and covert a bit. Benign manipulations are anything nice the narcissist does for you. That could be cooking you a nice meal, giving you a gift, love bombing or helping in some way. Even though its benign, Its still a manipulation to keep you under control. Covert is a little different because covert can be malign or benign. Stalking is a malign, covert manipulation.
Its the same for me. I need to keep my addiction in check because I can see the possibility of being swayed.
Hi Leigh
I can see your healthy admiration for HG and at the same time think HG essentially wants us to be educated, which includes about him so it seems all good (and his democratic approach to comments). Ah yes thanks re benign manipulations! That’s helpful.
I think we all look out for each other too. ❤️ This is partly why I asked lots of questions of HG when I started too, just to try and read the situation as we’re here because of something or many things that have been harmful already.
Ps I do find comments confusing here.. some I get via email, some I don’t, some are moderated and some seem to go straight through 🤔 is that a WP issue… Luckily I just noticed your one Leigh…
https://narcsite.com/rules/
at present, there is microsoft windows 10 changes, that may also lead to current issues many users may be experiencing……..Wordpress could be impacted as a result…..
Jade,
It’s a watcher sending you signals.
Gulp, Arya 🫥
Ah thanks for the info, Asp Amp! 🙂
Jade,
It actually should be “the Watcher”, not “a watcher”, cause it’s the only one Watcher here. I keep mixing up those articles “a” or “the ” in English.
Haha Arya.. a watcher felt creepier 🥷 I think I’m getting into the spooky October vibe! 🎃
Hi Jade,
All comments are moderated by Mr. Tudor. If they go straight through, that means you’ve caught Mr. Tudor while he’s moderating and he’s pushing them through. Sometimes Mr. Tudor holds comments because you’ve asked him something and he’s waiting to answer it. Most of the time, Mr. Tudor pushes a bunch of comments at once.
I check the threads on commenting on to see if anyone has responded to me because I can’t trust WordPress. Many times I don’t get notifications.
Thanks Leigh.. that explains the automatic ones. yeh I have been doing a double check too!
Hi Jade,
I find WordPress a bit annoying sometimes. I often don’t get notifications but I do get emails. I usually go through the threads I’m having conversations on to make sure I haven’t missed anything.
Mr. Tudor moderates all comments so if you see comments coming through immediately, it means he’s active on the blog.
Most often he pushes a bunch of comments all at once.
Sometimes he holds comments because he wants to answer them at a later time.
Thanks Leigh!
Hi Jade,
Sorry about the duplicate comments. I thought my first one didn’t go through. Which sometimes happens with WordPress too.
No worries Leigh! Always appreciate your support, emotional and technical! 😊
Dear Mr Tudor,
One would think a woman wrote this.
Thank you for this very emotional heartfelt piece. You have an extraordinary gift and talent Mr Tudor.
I am a shapeshifter.
Thank you.
HG:
I so look forward to your Halloween stories! Can’t wait!
I confess to shedding a tear reading this. I am not convinced the person I’m thinking of is a narcissist, so I might check one day (Father Dearest first though). I think I was as much of a ‘douche’ as he was, but in different ways. Still, I can relate to this beautifully written – woven – piece and although the story differs in places, the emotion and psychological damage was similar. I have a small question about it, which I shall ask on ‘Questioning Me’.
Dear HG,
How do you know the depth of the pain and then write it so beautifully? You are so talented, a rare gift, HG! Xx
As I’ve explained before, I listen, I watch and I recall. Understanding the behaviour of one’s prey is a form of stimulation and affords a greater degree of efficacy.
Dear HG,
You study people to relieve your boredom and to be more efficent at getting the prime aims from them, whereas I study people to read their mood so I can feel safe around them, or to know when it’s not safe around them. ..there lies the difference in the reasons why we both study people. Xx
Well said Rebecca.
Thank you, Jade, it’s good to spot the differences. Xx
Hi Rebecca,
This is an interesting conversation. I fall somewhere between you and Mr. Tudor. I don’t see people as prey like Mr. Tudor does. But I do think by understanding people, I have a little bit of an upper hand. Most of the time, I’m like you and I’m just trying to figure out if someone is safe or not. But once I know someone is unsafe, I like knowing that Ican see right their shenanigans.
Hi Leigh,
I can see through their facade, it takes time and observations and getting their vibes, though some are complex, like my stepson, and I need more time to observe their behaviors. I think with my stepson, I think my love for him has cloudied my view of him. Perhaps, I don’t want to acknowledge the behaviors, like I did with my husband…part of me is fighting what I see and hear. I struggle with seeing my stepson, why I did the NDC on him on Friday. I love both him and his twin sister, and she is MLSNarc. It’s hard to take when those you love and watched grow up are narcs. You understand, your one daughter is one….it’s a painful acknowledgement, but one that I must keep in mind. Xx
I’m definitely both of these, Rebecca and Leigh. I’ve always assessed people for “safety” but in the past would then people please, fawn etc to stay safe too. Now I can “see” much better so i like being one step ahead (usually) and it’s very weird how clear the shenanigans are to me now. Especially in situations where you’ve known someone a long time and looking at their behaviour “post realisation”… 🙈 I sometimes feel like I’ve woken from a bad dream and can see properly now (like we were saying recently Leigh.. it’s like seeing behind the curtain!).
Hi Jade,
Yes, we can see behind the curtain now and it’s a beautiful thing!
Hi Leigh:
Is it an instinct, learning from HG or both? How do you see?
Hi Contagious,
Hands down its from the knowledge I gained from Mr. Tudor. He’s sharpened my instincts so I can see clearer now.
I know I still struggle with ET but its still so much better than it was before finding Mr. Tudor.
Rebecca,
As I was filling out the narc detector on my daughter, thats when it hit me that she was definitely a narc. I knew that would be the result that Mr. Tudor would give as well.
I remember that you were sure about it when you did it on your step daughter. How did you feel after completing it on your stepson? Maybe your doubt is a good thing. I’m going to keep my fingers and toes crossed for you.
It is beautiful Leigh!
Hi Leigh,
You remember correctly about how I felt while doing the NDC for my stepdaughter. Her behaviors were pretty in uour face and blunt, whereas, her twin brother is more passive aggressive. His lying was a concern, as I caight him in several lies, but his behaviors weren’t as awful or as blunt as his sister’s.
During the NDC questions, I was still questioning what he was. I made sure to add as many behaviors as I have witnessed myself. I got the result and I can see why I was so stumped on what he is, why I felt he was complex and difficult to figure out. Xx
Dear HG,
May I give the results of my stepson’s NDC? Xx
Hi Rebecca,
Was your stepson’s results the same as your father and best friend?
Yet what I admire about you and why I follow you is you share the that knowledge in a myriad of ways it sinks in. No one does that better than you:)
….makes you feel sad for the rest.
🎶HG, you’re the best….🎶
I knew you were, Tudor, HG Tudor. You take your Deutz in a tulip glass, not a brandy snifter.
It really does HG. The longer I’m here the more I see the tremendous depth and value of your work. You clearly put a lot of time and effort into it and have created a unique angle based on the actual reality of narcissism. your writing abilities are also outstanding .. it’s useful to be able to watch YT, listen to interviews, read informative articles as well as this type of writing. I like them all but as other commenters said it helps to access your work in different ways. your work deserves to be shared far and wide. 👌
Ps I’ve had so many epiphanies since commenting 🤯🙏
Hello, excuse the barge, but I think this probably answers my question on this piece. I sent it to ‘Questioning Me’, asking if there was one source of inspiration, or if this piece is a composite of observations.
Oh, this is so good. Your latest writing is beautifully refined, HG. This line is my favourite:
“The paradox of my mourning lies in the dissonance between what was and what I wanted it to be.”
They just keep getting better. I have lived this, you described it perfectly.
Thank you.
No, H.G. Tudor, you can’t do that! That’s a forbidden move!!!!!!
A 10 out of 10 hit?
I was told “narcissists don’t have telepathy.” What the hell is that then?!)))
No. No. Well, here I am again, crying because of something I read here (but I’m not a crybaby).
That’s called getting under your skin. A low blow, forbidden!
P.S.
But it is still a healing text.
I really liked the tapestry metaphor.
Thank you.
Mr. Tudor,
You really painted a picture of exactly what cognitive dissonance looks like when dealing with a narcissist.
Absolutely beautifully written!
Thank you.
Beautifully written.
Thank you.
No problem HG and weirdly perfectly timed for me to read the night that I realised I *have* had romantic relationships with narcissists (as per my other recent comments)! I’ve felt every word of this. I just was being too fair on some of my ex’s and not seeing exactly what they did. Fuckers!