The Ten Tests of Competing Prospects



I have grown weary of the incumbent primary supply. The fuel that ought to be provided at a premium level has become diminished in quantity and quality. Whilst it still flows as part of the devaluation that continues, the time has come to audition for your replacement. I am courting you following my usual preparatory work once you have been targeted and I have now commenced your seduction. You are not alone. I am seducing someone else as well. It makes sense to have an insurance policy after all. You won’t know about this competitor (at least not yet) but believe me that when you are in the early stages of being seduced by our kind, it is highly likely that I was seducing someone else. In order to identify the best source of fuel so we choose the most effective primary source, we will set a number of tests. These tests are not so arduous that they will risk the seduction failing, but are designed to ascertain which of the two, or more, competing prospects provides the best fuel. This current performance amounts to a strong indicator of future performance. Here are ten of the tests that are commonly utilised.


  1. Sending the same text message to both prospects to see who responds the fastest.
  2. Sending the same text message to both prospects without concerns as to the speed of reply but as to which provides the best fuel-laden response.
  3. Arranging a date with both prospects and then cancelling (with a view to re-arranging of course) to determine who is the most disappointed and which of the prospects tries to keep the date alive by making adjustments and alternative suggestions.
  4. Calling both prospects in the middle of the night to see who answers.
  5. Sending the same gift at the same time to see who thanks us the fastest and in the most appreciative manner.
  6. If sexual coupling has occurred at this early juncture, then sleeping with you both in the space of 24 hours (or less) in order to determine who is the more fuel accomplished lover.
  7. Feigning a minor emergency and seeing who responds the fastest and with the greatest concern and compassion.
  8. Suggesting a date when I know that the prospects have something else on to see who will break their existing engagement in order to see me.
  9. Having a lieutenant try to arrange a date with you to see if you rebuff him and make mention of me.
  10. Holding a social media challenge to see how many likes, re-tweets, comments each prospect applies to my postings in a three-day period to see who posts the most and provides the most fuel.


Not only does this contest between the two prospects provide us with plenty of fuel coming from two fuel lines, it enables us to determine who we should focus our greater efforts on to ensure they are seduced and become our intimate partner and primary source. If the contest is too close to call after the ten tests above, then additional tests will be applied and the ten above will be re-run also. The winner becomes our intimate partner but the loser does not go home empty handed, not at all. They are likely to be awarded the status of inner or outer circle friend and they will be kept within our sphere of influence as a supplier of fuel. They also a future role to play in a prospective triangulation and there may even be a promotion in the offing at some point….

23 thoughts on “The Ten Tests of Competing Prospects

  1. Noname says:

    Apparently, my both husbands had used another test-system on me, because I would have failed all tests from that list aside of #7.

    Not “with the greatest concern and compassion” though, but I would have asked what is wrong and what type of help he needs exactly to solve the “emergency”. I guess, it is not the “fuelling” response too. So, complete failure. Lol.

  2. sepultura13 says:

    These tricks are pathetically obvious, when I see them pulled on me. Some recent follower of my blog did #1 and #2 about a month ago, for some reason – it isn’t as if I had any romantic interest in him, but your kind assumes that everyone you meet is hot for you, so that was his mistake.

    At any rate, I let him know that his silly games weren’t needed and have ceased all contact. I didn’t need some no-talent plagiarist pretending collaboration with me to steal my ideas!

  3. Cara says:

    And what happens when the incumbent and the challenger BOTH realize you’re no prize? What then, I wonder.

    1. malignnarc says:

      If this unlikely event occurs well the incumbent will have been discarded and the challenge will no realise this until devaluation and at that stage it is not a concern because guess what? There is a new challenger or two already being put in place.

      1. Cara says:

        You’ve got a whole team of them

      2. nikitalondon says:

        So the competion is exponential then…

    2. nikitalondon says:

      Ohhhh noooooo. He is the king Cara!

  4. TheFlowerandRock says:

    When you work your way beyond that YO, and wish to defend lemme know

  5. Yo says:

    Dear all. I want to say “thanks” to all of you:
    both to the defected person who writes this blog and all you who suffered from MN and commented here.
    You gave me a lot and helped a lot.

    Thank you
    May the force be with u

    1. malignnarc says:

      Thank you Yo, your kind words are appreciated.

  6. HG, being well and truly on the other side, I can read this and it makes me laugh because I’m sure he has done all of these.

    More recently he has hoovered frequently, to no effect. Then a week ago he had a lieutenant friend request me on FB. This is a friend who deleted me previously after numerous failed attempts to seduce me, and he didn’t hold back haha. Anywya eventually he deleted me ( he is a borderline a pure pure borderline) and I do actually find him quite endearing.

    Anyway, I didn’t accept. And today I receive a malign Hoover from the MN.

    Do you think the lieutenant thing was independent of the MN ? Or linked ? Doesn’t really matter either way, I’m just interested.

    1. malignnarc says:

      Linked. You were feeling the force of MN and a rejected Lt.

      1. Well that was a definite response HG. Thank you. No uncertainty left this end.

        1. malignnarc says:

          Pleasure Alexis.

  7. Yo says:

    I need an executive summarise). Not more than a4 please.

    1. malignnarc says:

      What’s your opening bid?

  8. nikitalondon says:

    i wonder what the comments of this will be and also in facebook, because I had to laugh because of the empty hands sentence… although I know this is true very true. 😖 And then its not so funny 😨.

    I am still waiting for the call in the middle of the night 😘😘😘. The phone is full volume ❤️

    1. malignnarc says:

      What’s that ringing sound Nikita?

      1. nikitalondon says:

        I just called myself to listen well. Its like a very load truuuuuuuuuu 🎼🎼and then again and again… So I am sure to wake up just in case 😘

  9. Yo says:

    Dear MN, a defected person with some talents for writing. Could u please provide us with the similar test/check list to detect a MN when we meet him?
    Would appreciate a lot

    1. malignnarc says:

      Only some talents, dear me, you will have to do better than that Yo! In terms of the detection of a narcissist there is a whole host of tests/check lists in Red Flag. There is plenty of detail for you there.

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