The Scent of Blood
In our engagement with our appliances and especially with our primary sources, we are repeatedly seeking to extract fuel. We have been designed to draw those fuel providers into our grasp, from the colleagues that we work with, the relevant family members and friends so that rather than surround ourselves with appliances of limited function we ensure that all those who are attached to us are likely to provide us with fuel. As I have explained before, we like to preserve our energy and operate in an efficient and effective fashion. As part of that approach we like to ascertain if we can scent fuel in our interactions with you, in the same way that a shark smells blood in the ocean and knows that a bigger prize awaits. There are certain responses that you provide that immediately tell us that there is more fuel ready to be extracted. Just as how a tiny nick on your leg may cause droplets of blood to fall and be smelt by the predatory shark, there are certain things that you will say to us that tells us that we should dive straight in and seize the advantage. There are comments that you will make which indicates to us that you are holding a reservoir of fuel just under the surface and all we need to do is slice you open and gorge on that waiting fuel. Your response tells us that your emotion is there, just a few moments away from being extracted, seized and gathered, so that rather than attend to something else we are best served by focusing our efforts on you.
It is akin to staring at a vast body of water behind a glass partition. We want that body of water to come gushing forward, engulfing us and cascading over us. We do not wish to dedicate the time to hammering away at this toughened glass in the hope of eventually making it crack. We do not want to expend our energy chiselling and drilling but instead we want to find the weak spot. We want to identify that flaw, that weakness, that opening, which means that with the careful application of pressure, the edifice will shatter and the water will come surging over us in an instant. You are no different. You are filled with fuel. That is why we chose you. You might be a co-dependent super tanker of fuel that requires the hull to be holed, you may be a super empathic fuel well which just needs to be drilled or an empathic fuel pump where one pinprick in the hose will allow the fuel to spurt out. You are a walking fuel depot and at times we can do just one thing, say one thing and the fuel will come fountaining from you, shooting out of you, gushing from you, ready for us to suck it all up, gorging on your delicious and potent fuel and drinking deep of your vast resources.
It is you that gives us the indication that you are ready to flow with fuel, that the dam can easily be breached and once you provide that indication to us, it only takes a small amount of pressure, a modicum of application and the most straightforward of manipulations to cause you to burst and we gain so much fuel. You are teetering on the brink of providing the fuel, it is almost spilling over there is so much of it and you tell us that it is there, often in just one sentence and then we apply the pressure and the geyser erupts.
These indications are applicable to both positive fuel and negative fuel. The comments in themselves will provide some slight amount of fuel but they are indicators, gateways telling us that in that moment there is a whole host of additional fuel ready to be tapped and it is easy to do so. This is why when you provide us with the positive indicators we dive in and invite you to expand on the point that you have made, the comments that you have shared because we know that there is more behind what you have said and we want it. It becomes even more evident when with the negative indicators. These really are a green light for us to satiate our fuel lust in the way that a pugilist would satisfy his bloodlust. You have waved the key in front of us through your comment and we will focus on that comment and what it signifies in order to get at the fuel that is hoarded behind it.
Should you say them to us you should be aware that you have just telegraphed that there is fuel to be gained and whatever we might have been doing will be forgotten as we turn and fix our eyes on you. Like the cruising shark, the scent of blood has been detected and easy and satisfying prey is well within reach. Our cold jaws will be clenched around you as we puncture you and begin to slurp on the surfeit of fuel. What then are these indicators, what should you be aware of what is it that you say which tells us that there is fuel ready and waiting to be extracted, exploited and consumed?
The Positive Indicators
- I love you
- How did you manage to do that?
- There is nobody like you.
- Where did you get that shirt from?
- That was amazing.
- That is an outstanding result.
- I could listen to you talk for hours.
- I could kiss you forever.
- I would die for you.
- I cannot imagine being anywhere else right now other than with you.
- I have finally found what I have been searching for.
- If I died now, it would not matter.
- I don’t know what I would do without you.
- I would do anything for you.
- I belong to you.
The Negative Indicators
- Where have you been?
- I hate you right now.
- Don’t leave me.
- Why must you hurt me like this?
- Who is she?
- I just need to feel loved.
- I miss you still.
- Is that it?
- What about me?
- You are being unfair.
- Please listen to me.
- Don’t shout at me.
- I don’t understand.
- Please talk to me.
- Please stop.
- I need to sleep.
- Please be reasonable.
- It is my birthday.
- Please, for my sake, just do it.
- You are scaring me now.
Let the feeding frenzy commence.
41 thoughts on “The Scent of Blood”
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Reblogged this on NarcMagNet69x96.
The predator and prey analogy is perfect. Absolutely. I love the way you explain everything. You never cease to amaze.
If I had a nickel for every time someone told me I was like a lioness stalking prey until I am ready to pounce well…..I would have a lot of bloody useless nickels.
This gives me food for deep thought. I have been here for almost thirteen years. I see his actions day in and day out but they are just that…actions. I just can’t believe that is who he is created to be. Of course I need to focus on my own life and not judge the life of another, even if he is my husband.
Does anyone ever stay married (or in a relationship) with an N? I’m curious…
I’d assume they would need to be super empaths+co-dependants… or peope with Stockholm syndrome. .. correct me dear G. if I’m wrong…
And so the sheep fell in love with the lion…
Oh did I bleed….
I think I’ll just have to not speak around my soon to be ex husband when he visits our newborn. I’m guilty of giving him so much fuel, positive and negative. He knows my heart, my love for him and takes advantage, of course. I’m always left “bleeding” as he walks out the door after visits.
How do you feel when we show indifference?
Mine stopped communicating with me, usually I’d get terribly upset and ask him what I’ve done. But I know I’ve done nothing wrong, so am not chasing him up.
In the meantime he’s turned into stalky mc stalker and is everywhere I am. Why ignore me when he’s only going to stalk me? I go out of my way to show indifference, I don’t want him to know he’s got to me and I’m not playing his stupid game of chase.
Hello Watermelon,
We hate indifference. That tells us we are uninteresting and not of note, contrary t everything that we believe to be the case about us.
Yes a silent treatment may well be the reaction to indifference. He ignores you in order to try to re-establish dominance and superiority over you. He wants you to come running, spilling fuel and submitting to his control again.
I think I need a transfusion after this one!
This is so true as I am learning. I know this and and know this well, but the word vomit is uncontrollable at times. It is true that I tell him which cards to toss and which ones to play. He tried playing the name calling card early on, but soon learned that he will not win with one. I do not use name calling or spiteful words and I have told him that I simply do not participate in such away that is below me. I have also told him that his words do not effect me and can be easily brushed off as I know they are not true. That card is rarely played now. He holds the winning card and due to my recent word vomit he is pulling it out. He never played this card before and I knew as soon as I said it that I would regret it. Yes I knew this, but I couldn’t hold it back or stop it from gushing out. There it was ready for him to soak up. A new card to play with the good ol’ reliable silent treatment. When will I ever learn?
Hmm maybe he bled me dry, I owned all those. I was screaming something fierce all the negative and always when i was alone, tears and all, I was a serious hot mess! I do wonder if he was watching at times.
Hi HG, have you written anything on how to avoid being a target for narcicists and sociopaths in the dating world, including tips on how to write a dating profile that will repel those that are searching for prey? I’m working on some of those traits in me daily though when I go out there in the dating world, i would like some repellant. Ideas?
Hi Indy, I have not written anything in terms of writing a dating profile. I have written two articles which contain questions which will assist in flushing out our kind at an early stage and there of course is the book Red Flag which provides any examples of behaviour to watch out for.
To avoid being a target is difficult because this would mean you would have to change the person you are. Firstly, you may not be able to. Secondly, you may not want to. Rather than trying to lter your behaviour so you are not a target, which is difficult, the better action to take would be to
1. Know our kind so you can spot them very early on;
2. Know how to get away
Do you know what would be awesome to read? You have said you have used online dating to find prospects. You should share what one your bios reads. Coming from the Master, it would be interesting to see if, in the past when I tried online dating, it’s the kind of profile I’d be drawn to or repel.
I have made a note Clarece to write about this.
Feel free to include your snapshot so we can all take in whole package you present! (Haha jk)
Hi HG,
I did read your previous blog on questions to ask and typical responses of each type. It was a very helpful and informative read. However, I would like to spot some sooner to avoid the cost of getting a cute pair of shoes for the first date lol
I agree with you MLA, I would like to see HG write a sample profile one would find online…it was partially what I was getting at 😊
Lookingfortheone:
“I would like to meet a nice, sweet, loyal girl who isn’t crazy, needy and will serve me grade AA fuel. Oh yeah, she must have legs like a race horse, hair like the sun and eyes that drip compassion…and not want too much sex, though always when I want it…and loves all the things I love, even when I switch”
I close my lappy after reading such and laugh maniacally while drinking a margarita. If only it was so obvious. Though, some are more obvious than others….I want to spot a smarty pants narcicist before I’m hooked. They are the true seduction artists…..Please, HG 🙏
Hi Indy, there are a few ways of achieving this so I shall pen an article about it. It is in the list.
Most appreciative 🙂
What are the articles you’ve written to spot narcs early on?
https://narcsite.wordpress.com/2016/07/30/exposed-part-one-5-tips-to-expose-danger/
https://narcsite.wordpress.com/2016/08/03/exposed-part-2-5-early-warnings/
Hi Indy. Good for you to be so courageous to get back out there. I agree that Mr. Tudor is right as always, there are some things about us that we cannot or don’t want to change. Unfortunately in my case, when I detect the red flags I’m already too far in. I am a moth to narc flame. It is a very strong pull. One of my guy friends has even tried to act like a narc, to distract me and deter my attention from a real narc. Unfortunately it did not work. I was hookline and sinker into the real one. So here are my suggestions about who to avoid from the get go:
– If you are immediately drawn to them, avoid them
– If you instantly want to nurture them and take care of their needs, avoid them
– If you feel sorry for them, and believe they are misunderstood, avoid them
– If you feel the right woman (you) will fix them and make them learn how to love again, run.
Hello Love,
I am pleased you posted this because you provide an excellent example of how feigning the emotions will not work. If you as our victims feign your responses we will detect it. Perhaps not at first (dependent on the school of narcissist you are dealing with) but we will and there will be repercussions.
I think your four suggestions bear merit, I will remember to ensure you do not really like me but find me curious when we meet!
Hi HG,
Indeed and agreed. Perhaps I misunderstood what you wrote, though I do wish to clarify that I don’t think I ever suggested that I wish to feign anything. I made the statement that “I’m working on some of those traits in me daily though when I go out there in the dating world, I would like some repellant”. This is different. I am working on those things in me that are not healthy, not my essence of my being. There are things in me that were/are unhealthy that I know draw narcissists, such as co-dependence traits and a desire to care for others over the self. This is what I meant by my statement. And, I agree with Love and you both on your suggestions, completely. I still would like samples of stating profiles to avoid that are of the higher functioning narcissistic level, pretty please.
They are in the list.
Love what you said, Love!!! And very good advice. I am not out there yet. I’m healing still, though I want to prepare for when I am out there. Yes, if I feel the need to nurture, fix or rescue, they are out. I have also eliminated anyone with a history of addiction (one weakness). It is hard to avoid those we are strongly drawn to, though. I will think on this as I think I know where you are going with this and it can be good advice, especially if we are habitually drawn to the toxic types.
Best to you~
Indy
Thank you! Added to list: If you are even mildly curious about them – run like the wind. 😉
No don’t do that !
Love,
Hahahhahaha, nice! …as I walk into the convent to pledge my celibacy to God, “Father forgive me for I have sinned…there is this man I think is cute and I ran as fast as I could here”….
Oh I see a few that belong to me. All in the negative pile.
Fm FM1T
Think I must be a smorgasbord to narcs! Smh
I fall with having said 9 Positives and 13 of the Negatives.
JN update…after close to three weeks of him circling, I pressed today if he is planning to see me since he’s in touch. I got “my schedule is up in the air and I don’t want a nuclear explosion like last time.” Old Clarece would have commenced an infuriated tongue lashing. Today I just said “in typical fashion, your usual status quo”. Then blocked him on social media and have been silent. Trying to appear neutral and unphased. I guess it was a malign Hoover looking for the usual fight? I like that I went silent on him. He sent a snap almost immediately after I blocked FB, so it’s just sitting there unopened. I really don’t want to see anything negative and I’m finally not caring enough to check if it could be nice. He’s never been nice before in this typical pattern. I’m working on re-conditioning myself to be neutral and unphased whether I hear from him or not.
So the definition of fuel is emotions and reactions ? Please help me understand your meaning of fuel . Is it joy and pain from others that you must cause and witness ?
Hello Starr, fuel is the emotional reaction either witnessed (which is best) or perceived (Thought Fuel) from somebody as a consequence of what we say or do. It can be a stranger giving us an admiring smile because we look good, our spouse crying because we are shouting at them or a friend praising us for our achievements. It comes in both positive and negative fuel. There is much to understand about it and the best way of doing so is to read my book Fuel.
Hi HG, Did you follow up with “Why” after most of the positive indicators? I heard this word more than any other and now I believe it was just to extract more fuel from me for hours upon hours.
Absolutely correct SW.
sorry but I dont get it.. what is the positive to be aware of ?
The only positive indicator from me was you’re amazing!! But that was only after a decent sex session. The only negative indicator was “I hate you! … when he was an arrogant prick!