My narc is soooo tricky .. When I was feeling down and out he decided to take me out for dinner and a show .. To cheer me up! The few days before the show I was victim to HotAndCold!! BULLSHIT MANIPULATION!! That same day I saw my therapist for An hr then DBT .. I obviously looked stressed and anxiety ridden during the 2 hr group DBT .. She said to me do you need to talk to me after the two hr group ( bullshit, the women in the group are idiots , ignorant . Look it up , meAnings of the words).. I was like sure do I had another hr long session w her .. I said I’m not ready to sAy no ! What’s worse crying in self pity or going to An event w him that I mAy be made to feel like shit?…. Crying? Well earlier thT day In between my therapy sessions I get this text from him that is totLy of the subject of why he was mAd at me the night before .. It was like all the anxiety and fear , walking on eggshells was aliveated by his random text about insignificant shit .. I began to feel relieved… Anxiety gone , fear gone .. WTF… I gAve him that control.. My therapist said .. It’s ok to give to this event w him as long as I RADICALLY accepted the situation i wAs getting myself into .. Like I said.. The fight or flight emotionally charged response was aliveated by his .. It’s ok everything is ok non past responded response .. And ya know what ? I did not question it .. Everything was ok ..w him I’ve leArned if time passes he gets over things.. And true to form it was this way .. In this instance., wth.. How come I Am so attached to this evil persons approval That I give him control that makes me emotionally respond to his shit that causes me so much complex pain ..? Tell me please … I’m not ready for no contact .. Yes I have your book . I still dwindle there.. Like a leave in autumn … Clinging to hope .. I’m atheist.. So I don’t believe in fate . I’m fucked!
The deliberate emotional infection is what causes you to be attached to this individual and in your instance I suspect it is in addition because you require the approval and sensation of control to find some validation for yourself. I suggest you read Chained to ascertain if there is any resonance there for you and then Manipulated, Fuel, Devil’s Toolkit and Escape which will allow you to understand more of what he is doing and why, along with steps you can take to counter his control and lessen it as you prepare yourself to instigate No Contact.Gaining understanding will provide you with the crutch until you feel ready to go No Contact.
I found it extremely interesting when I asked the ex-MN if he felt any guilt whatsoever for doing what we were doing to his wife. His answer (very adamantly) … NO! No explanation at all, just NO!
HUGE RED FLAG!!! Unfortunately, at the time, I took it as though he must really love me then, because immediately afterwards, he started kissing me passionately. WOW!!! How I can see and understand things so clearly, and different, now. He obviously had absolutely no guilt whatsoever; and he was going to make damn sure I didn’t feel any either.
HG, I know you’re one of his kind, but I need to thank you so incredibly much for turning on the lights.
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I remember finishing the chapter from Your book… turning the page and being cought on this one… perfect joke xxx
My narc is soooo tricky .. When I was feeling down and out he decided to take me out for dinner and a show .. To cheer me up! The few days before the show I was victim to HotAndCold!! BULLSHIT MANIPULATION!! That same day I saw my therapist for An hr then DBT .. I obviously looked stressed and anxiety ridden during the 2 hr group DBT .. She said to me do you need to talk to me after the two hr group ( bullshit, the women in the group are idiots , ignorant . Look it up , meAnings of the words).. I was like sure do I had another hr long session w her .. I said I’m not ready to sAy no ! What’s worse crying in self pity or going to An event w him that I mAy be made to feel like shit?…. Crying? Well earlier thT day In between my therapy sessions I get this text from him that is totLy of the subject of why he was mAd at me the night before .. It was like all the anxiety and fear , walking on eggshells was aliveated by his random text about insignificant shit .. I began to feel relieved… Anxiety gone , fear gone .. WTF… I gAve him that control.. My therapist said .. It’s ok to give to this event w him as long as I RADICALLY accepted the situation i wAs getting myself into .. Like I said.. The fight or flight emotionally charged response was aliveated by his .. It’s ok everything is ok non past responded response .. And ya know what ? I did not question it .. Everything was ok ..w him I’ve leArned if time passes he gets over things.. And true to form it was this way .. In this instance., wth.. How come I Am so attached to this evil persons approval That I give him control that makes me emotionally respond to his shit that causes me so much complex pain ..? Tell me please … I’m not ready for no contact .. Yes I have your book . I still dwindle there.. Like a leave in autumn … Clinging to hope .. I’m atheist.. So I don’t believe in fate . I’m fucked!
The deliberate emotional infection is what causes you to be attached to this individual and in your instance I suspect it is in addition because you require the approval and sensation of control to find some validation for yourself. I suggest you read Chained to ascertain if there is any resonance there for you and then Manipulated, Fuel, Devil’s Toolkit and Escape which will allow you to understand more of what he is doing and why, along with steps you can take to counter his control and lessen it as you prepare yourself to instigate No Contact.Gaining understanding will provide you with the crutch until you feel ready to go No Contact.
I found it extremely interesting when I asked the ex-MN if he felt any guilt whatsoever for doing what we were doing to his wife. His answer (very adamantly) … NO! No explanation at all, just NO!
HUGE RED FLAG!!! Unfortunately, at the time, I took it as though he must really love me then, because immediately afterwards, he started kissing me passionately. WOW!!! How I can see and understand things so clearly, and different, now. He obviously had absolutely no guilt whatsoever; and he was going to make damn sure I didn’t feel any either.
HG, I know you’re one of his kind, but I need to thank you so incredibly much for turning on the lights.
You have earned your title XXX
Perfection! I expect nothing less.
Love
He looks like he’s trying to keep his laugh in…
You forgot to end it with “Deal with it.”
Deal with it.
Now it feels just right.
😂😂😂
Ha ha….
perfect!
oh by the way, nice hands.
s’cute. s’cute HG
Now where is my pumpkin latte.
Hahhaha
I have no Dunkin doughnuts so I’m screwed for pumpkin latte like them. It there’s always Starbucks yess
Haha 😂 Touché
Wow ! No words . You are something else Mr Tudor .
Thank you Starr. Not the first time I have heard that, but thank you nevertheless.
You are killing it today.
I am obliged.