85 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Truths No. 2”

    1. Hello IMMC, if you are asking about me, yes it is, save for when I descend into a frenzy then it shatters. With regard to others of my kind it depends on the type of narcissist which details their control threshold and also the amount of fuel they are receiving. In terms of your second question do you mean hypothetically what happens viz a viz the mask when a narcissist is married? If you mean specific to me, I am not married.

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      1. I wasn’t referring to you specifically. My questions pertain more to an elite Cerebral narcissist/psychopath.

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      2. Articulate better what descending into a frenzy is. I think along the lines of a panic attack. Similar?

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    2. I happen to be married to 1. The day after we got married, he started the devalue. He has made me feel like he is cheating constantly. He takes his phone everywhere he goes. He acts very sneaky all of the time. We were married 2 yrs as of last August. I’m already to the point of total disgust for him and alot of bitterness. I’m not scared of him at all. I have too much anger from his bullshit. I hate him more and more each day. I don’t give him anything. I’ve been ready to divorce him. I need a job first which won’t take long. He has no feelings besides anger and he still tries to punish me with the silent treatment but I give it to him. I’m so done with him. I called him out last night. He got so mad that he started throwing my clothes outside. I called the police and they threatned to take him to jail just for his attitude. He calmed down real quick. It was extremely entertaining. God forbid anyone find out that he’s not the saint like he portrays to be. Anyway, yep, he’s a true narcissist. I see right thru him. Too bad I married him before I realized it. Good luck to you

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  1. Awww….Anna….good to see your face! Love your pic! It reminds me of Cupid and Psyche in the end…before the “divine romance” commenced…

      

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    1. Thank you. Cupid and psyche 85 was an album by Scritti Politti. You may recall my musical mind. I know what you are referring to though. It made me wonder if “The Golden Ass” is part of Mr. Tudors Golden period….lol

      BTW, did you receive my biblical answers to Osiris and the other things we wrote of?

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      1. Anna, do you like Scritti Politti? What are your favorite songs? I don’t correlate myself as part of HG’s Golden Period…the “Golden Ass” is hilarious though – wouldn’t that be like epitome of an epic fail: “You could have had bliss for a year and chose the ass. Way to go.” Lol…that would be a double negative… HG already has an IP amongst many other applicants but has that ability to make everyone think it’s all about them – that’s when the objective reality becomes mandatory! I am still working on figuring out my own subjective truth but one of my rules is objective first then subjective.

        That is an interesting concept though of what the Golden Period would be like … were you involved with a Narcissist and had a Golden Period? If so, what was it like? That always seems to be related to really good memories. For me, I like to comment with my perspective from time to time – I appreciate HG’s honesty towards who he is and practice the art of acceptance although he can royally frustrate me at times but don’t believe it’s really directed towards me but knowledge of self is intense. It’s caused me paranoia a few times for sure…

        I didn’t see your responses to Osiris and will go back and look – WP Reader sucks. I almost feel like I need a Staff Member Dark Cupid myself – HG made that reference the other day and I burst out laughing …couldn’t just be Cupid….noooo….it’s Dark Cupid…and that’s just the staff!

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      2. Sarah,
        Scritti politti, how does one your age know of such things? ; )
        I would say off the top of my head…. wood beez, the word girl, absolute, best thing ever, boom there she was, philosophy now, hypnotize and of course perfect way.

        I was involved with many narcissists and was only devalued by one. The rest, I knew what they were and got out before devalue commenced.

        My advice to HG is: “stay gold pony boy, stay gold” – S.E. Hinton. Of course this is take on the Robert Frost poem that says in part, “nothing gold can stay”. I belived that to be HG’s take but I wish he could stay gold. However I do not know Aladdin and don’t have access to the lamp or a wishing well. I would generously give up one of my wishes for HG. This is why I am a fountain of fuel that grants other people’s wishes by coins being thrown at me.

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      3. Anna,

        I searched on iTunes and listened to a couple songs after you suggested it…there have been a few good music suggestions here – so far two songs are on my “playlist” that others suggested but that is a lot for me as I don’t have a specific genre exactly.

        When you say to HG, go gold – are you referring to the Golden Period? The Golden Period interests me and seems to be different for other people, but I think it would be assumed that the Narcissist would talk to you directly…I don’t really understand the Aladdin part or wishing well or coins…but I have read Hinton’s Outsiders and That Was Then and This is Now – I liked the later the best and think it was the first book I read for LIT in middle school. I was never one for poetry, but my favorite is probably Frost’s three lines to the Road Not Taken: “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
        I took the one less traveled by,
        And that has made all the difference.” I suppose you could say I am more of a vagabond. I’m still trying to find your last Osiris post? Do you remember what thread it was on?

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      4. Scritti politti was not narc related songs. The cd is called cupid and psyche 85, I was simply reminded of that particular group when you mentioned it. Cupid and psyche the story was an actual group of stories collectively called the golden ass. That’s why I made the joke. I was empathically stating that I wish HG could stay in the golden period. I would even be so empathic as to give up one of my three wishes I could get from Aladdin’s lamp to wish him staying gold forever. I think he believes nothing gold can stay. This is why I wish this for him. I am a fountain of fuel to the narcissist, or at least at one time was, I allowed people to abuse me (the fountain) by throwing coins at me (abuse) and they got their wishes but I did not get mine. I was just a vessel that they used and abused. So, HG can throw abuse at me, I accept that abuse and he gets his wish from the fountain of fuel.
        Osiris post is on The Stare. The other lengthy one, I cannot find. Maybe HG knows where it is, as it is quite lengthy. I can repost it here, but let’s ask him first.

        HG should I repost it or do you know where it is? Not osiris the other one. Please and thanks.

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      5. Anna,

        Didn’t mean to imply that Scritti was Narc related at all – I just usually check out the songs suggested here is all. I got the Golden Ass joke and thought it was funny and tried to be funny back relating to HG, although I am sure his Golden period’s never resulted in the Golden Ass tragedy – if I was trying, it for sure would, but a year of doing things other people like to do that I don’t like doing – for me that would dreadful, and I would snap. But that is also hurting people because as HG tells us, the Golden Period is used to “ensnare” so it’s only a ticking time bomb…but I asked him if he enjoyed the ensnarement and he said he did so maybe it’s not as dreadful as I am imagining. Before we get into the other posts…I have a question…but did you date HG in real life or know him in real life or did you just meet on the blog?

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      6. Anna,

        I am replying on the Osiris post on the Stare here, but cannot locate your Apis Bull comment – HG, do you know where that one went? Can you awaken me to its location with that super human brain of yours? How you keep up all with it I will never know!

        You are correct about Osiris and Jesus – the correct equivalent would be Horus. I had never associated the plagues with the gods/goddess of Egypt, but you very well may be on to something there – how did you correlate that? That was a good observation and I will look into it – the final plague on the first born son always seemed to be a reminder of Cain and Abel, and Jacob and Esau. I see many similarities between Moses and Jesus, but believe Moses failed in faith when he hit the rock which is why he was never able to achieve entrance to the Promise Land. I appreciated God’s sense of humor in the Old Testament when he tells Moses to ditch the Israelites and He will just make a nation with Moses (Exodus 32:11) – and of course, we have the Flood where God tried to exterminate us but left Noah and gave us the promise in the rainbow.

        As far as the cross being an idol – I believe anything that one loves more than God is an idol – this could be any object or even a person but is subjective to the person. The Golden Calf seemed to be invoke God’s wrath when Moses went to get the Ten Commandments from Mt. Sinai which is why Moses breaks them before he reads them so the Israelites would not be judged. Once the Commandments were delivered to the Israelites they became law – this worked well for many years until the Jews started to manipulate the laws to further their own agendas – speculation to the tribe of Levi of which were the Priests – the house divided into the Pharisees and Sadducees (remember the Bible was written by man, an imperfect being). Jesus returned to serve as a reminder that their intent was corrupt and that no longer would they obtain liberation through the laws alone, but by what was written in their heart – this message God had stated in the Old Testament as with David who was the only person whose epitaph reads “a man after God’s own heart “(1 Samuel 13:14, Acts. 13:22). However, this was forgotten and the Jewish aristocrats had control through the manipulation of the laws.

        In some ways, I see HG as following this methodology in a parallel with “nothing gold can stay”. Many whispers of HG’s comments have Jewish undertones to them from what I have observed – but then again, I am also half-Jewish by lineage so am usually in the middle between Judaism and Christianity and the bridge between the two.

        Do you see the cross as an idol? An interesting question is why the Catholics represent Jesus on the cross and the Christians have Jesus as resurrected from the cross?

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      7. HG, thanks for that, but that was an earlier comment…the comment was published on October 15, 2016 – I usually try to take a screen shot so I remember but if you see it lying anywhere just let me know – don’t want to cause you any trouble 🙂

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    1. So you traveled deep in the mines in Greece? I bet it was hard work. Was the mining profitable? Gold? Diamonds?

      I didn’t even know Greece had mines or that you could mine on the little island…I would think it would cause a landside… Can you image all of the tiny homes falling into the sea? This must have been dangerous, I’m glad you weren’t injured.

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      1. You got me… I am aware of what she is saying, I was trying to be a smarty pant because I would like her to elaborate on her minor in Greek – Greek Mythology, Greecian History, Greek as Language… what? A Minor in Greek would consist of 6 courses on Greecian studies.
        I was trying to be funny but obviously it was missed so…

        Sarah, please elaborate on your Greecian Studies… I can see, from many posts on the blog, that you are more interested in Greek Mythology.

        I do apologize if my post seemed more of an asshole remark… but I did make myself laugh 😛

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      2. Thank you Anna Belle! 🙂

        Oh yes, the why would be nice to know…

        I mean, what if she studied Greek culinary? I would then want her to cook for me! 😀 Yummy!

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      3. Not been to Lesbos. I went to Mykonos earlier this year. Very picturesque. There is a pub there which has a resident stork called Pedro. He has lived there for 26 years. Don’t say you don’t learn all manner of information from me!

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      4. Oh Anna Belle… this may be true! I’ve lost my ability to see true age now, I can’t tell the difference between a 15 year old and a 21 year old. This really is trying as I get hit on quite a bit by the young-ins… I have had to decline because I don’t like changing diapers BUT I do have to admit it isn’t too much different from dating a narcissist.
        It is a shame that I don’t visit the Isle of Lesbos, we seem to have some very beautiful women on here… the beauty I can appreciate but I do LOVE what a man has to offer. Besides, I think I would definitely want to be in complete control if I was into women.

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      5. DC,
        I can appreciate the beauty in all women. I am not a lesbian, but I look at woman, not like I’d like to get me some of that, but like yes she’s pretty, nice eyes, mouth, nose, tits, ass, body, hair whatever….humorous, intelligent, interesting…. but yes I prefer men too.

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      6. DC, lol about the miner…and no Anna, I am not Grecian underage girl lol again – I was referring to my undergraduate degree – I was an English/Pre-Law Major with a Greek Minor (Koine Ancient Greek Language) – it is no longer a spoken language. In class, we translated many works of Greek mythology into English. My parents had me learn Koine Greek since I can remember. In college, we had to have 2 years credits of a language to graduate, and I chose Greek as I figured it would be easier with my background – my teacher was very good and since not a lot of people were interested in the Greek language, he let different students work at different paces. Thus, I decided to make it my Minor…I was always changing catalogs to reduce credit hours, but find the Greek Mythology enjoyable…translating eh, not so much.

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      7. Thanks -I don’t want to talk about myself or interject, but will always throw-up Greek Mythology somewhere out of habit – translating it will do that to you.

        So…I have a hunch that you are a phenomenal cook…correct or incorrect?

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      8. Lol, writing on here we tend to show ourselves… Greek Mythology is actually interesting!
        I wouldn’t call myself a phenomenal cook but I do LOVE to recreate foods that please my palette! That and I’m a pescitarian so I’d like to enjoy the food I eat! Anything Mediterranean, Lebanese, Moroccan, Indian foods are my favourite!

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      9. Sarah, What type of law do you practice? What law school did you graduate from? Are you with a practice? Are you working your way up to being the Devil’s Advocate?

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      10. DC, I don’t feel comfortable giving out that information on the blog. As far as working myself up to Devil’s Advocate, hardly, no. I can’t get HG to listen to a suggestion!

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  2. If you had an IP who knew of your cheating and still stayed with you would you still eventually break up or discard that person or would you let them stay in your life as long as they choose to despite the abuse ?

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    1. Hello Starr, they would stay in my life because as I have mentioned, the Narcissistic Relationship is for life, so even if the Formal Relationship has ended, they would be hoovered etc.
      If they knew about the infidelity and remained there would only be a reason to discard them if they triggered one of the five reasons for discard which i have written about previously.

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      1. But if they don’t cheat on you and remain faithful and love you still than there should be no reason to discard the person .

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      2. It depends if they offend the triggers for discard. For instance, our infidelity may have led us to a new primary source and if this is embedded and their fuel is better, no matter what you do, then the discard happens. Or you may remain faithful and still love us but you are broken form the way we have treated you. You may also have remained faithful but told other people about what we have done and caused a major exposure which has caused the trigger for discard. It can still happen.

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      3. Of everything you write I can relate and make sense of… I know it all very well HOWEVER I still have not been through the discard stage so I cannot understand how it works or how it feels. This is what tears at me and made me think I was the narcissist… the difference is that I never wanted to hurt anyone and I didn’t leave because I was on to something new… I would just rather be single than have to deal with the crap I dealt with WITHOUT the golden period. AND why does your kind try so hard to bring the golden period back once we leave? You cannot fix what you have broken.

        Maybe I am borderline NarcEmpath…

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      4. We bring the golden period back because you delightful empaths find it so addictive and having it dangled in front of you again means you are far more likely to come back, provide fuel and be lured back in.

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      5. Dragon creeper you are no narc you are just smart and have a lot of self worth . I’m proud of you and I wish I could be more like you . I stayed his friend after the breakup when I left him for cheating on me and I tried to help him become a better person . I tried to teach him love and empathy but it’s a year later and i just found out he had sex with Another one of my co workers . Today he asked me to go to church with him . He said he wants to be better and he has found new friends who are very religious and has started attending church . HG do people of your kind usually go into churches and attend church for manipulations and more prey ?

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      6. I truly think that I am sometimes, I give everything until I am just tired and do not even want to try anymore. I have been in long term relationships and of course I’ve had my trial and error dating periods… I am quick to decide who I am interested in. I will give it all… but when I am done, I am done. Both with my exhusband and recent ex I tried to be civil. They both did the stalking and watching. I cut off my exhusband quickly, I refused to even talk to him unless it was about our child. My exN, he abused anything I gave him so he gets nothing. I would stay friends if they respected boundaries… they don’t, they NEVER will. Its been over 8 years and my ex-husband has already tried contacting me more, getting me to come over, try to hang out and talk. I feel nothing, absolutely nothing for that man…it is so easy to walk away from him. (This is sad because that means he has contacted me more than his own daughter.)
        I do not feel bad for them after the fact. They know very well what they do… they could have rectified the situation early on when I gave warning. They chose not to, it is not my problem any longer.
        The man that will win my heart will be the one that knows how to balance his sickness with his golden period… I find it highly unlikely I will find anyone. My exN told me that he kept doing what he did because he did not believe I would ever leave … I warned him, not once but several times. I have never been a weak woman and I have never walked a path blindly. I may have been confused by all of this but I knowingly allowed it. The difference for me is that I will always have a positive and joyus attitude , I look at everything that I have been through in life as a learning experience, an enlightenment (if you will). I regret NOTHING, I am strong because I push through, because I like the challenge, because I need the ups and the downs to keep life flowing through me so that I can pass on to others. To give hope, to give love and to encourage.

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      7. You are an amazing person . I’m so sad and I can’t enjoy anything anymore . It’s just not getting any better for me . I wish I was strong like you .

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      8. I appreciate that Starr but you have to find that joy inside yourself. You can be strong. You are the light, you are what creates the golden period, you are what makes them want to devalue you because YOU ARE love and light. You have to remember that and you have to fight through the moldy, mucky waters…

        I know this is so old but watch The Never Ending Story… the Nothing took almost everything and destroyed it. Bastian was the only one who could save them all, the only one with the light that shone so bright. Watch it and think about how this applies to your life. In the end, you are the only one who will save yourself. Be strong, be beautiful, and do not let anyone tear you down. It is all about knowing who you truly are! <3

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  3. Once you learn the narcissist and unfold. You can begin to read them better. I actually flip what he says and confuse him. Or so he acts. But then, he retracts and clams up. Runs to his other fuels. He is still smarter than I, because he still has the control of my emotions. But all in due time.

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      1. By my family in order to ensure that I gain my inheritance, to halt some distracting regulatory and criminal investigations (which are all lies) and to address my behaviour. They wanted me to address my behaviour through treatment and threatened to remove my inheritance and proceed with the investigations. In order to get what i need ( and as part of something else I have been working on) I agreed.

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      2. Interesting!
        So the link to the different consultations, how do they work? Your email is incorrect
        I will beat him.. I think

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  4. What if u want to divorce a narcissist and he refuses to divorce u? I’ve tried the same tactics on him that he’s used on me. I left our house and most of our possessions but he still is fighting the battle (even though I know he could care less about me and continues to anniliate me in public opinion). This has gone on for close to a year now. What should I expect from him?

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  5. What article of yours explains financial control/fuel? I would appreciate this info as I was dependent financially on Narc. He doled out resources as he saw fit. (Basically generosity related to my begging and pleading). I am no longer needing his financial “help”. Though he doesn’t yet know that

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  6. Hi HG,
    This is the most open I have seen you state this reason for therapy (inheritance and legal complications). I like this honesty! And, I hope you have other side effects from this therapy that are not intended from your end, that are a move toward less inner turmoil.

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    1. Ah Oh, uh your narcissism is showing…lol
      Go to urban dictionary and read about clock spider and limecat…..I always think about that when you mention atheism. You’ll get a laugh. Read clock spider first then limecat. It’s older story but still funny.

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      1. I do have some qualities of a narc and was not pleasant in my 20’s. I used and abused. I mellowed after having children. I am not a Narc. I was just a bitch.

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      2. I do not worship anything. Myself perhaps. HG is a close second. 😉
        Someone was eating acid when they came up with those stories.
        I really do not believe in anything religious and have not since I was very young.
        I just spent the past three days with Richard Dawkins. Trust me when I say I do not have one ounce of dogma in my world.

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  7. Dear ABB, I see the humor in it (except for the poor cat with the melon on its head, torture in my mind) but I do not see any humor in someone who has let their mind stop growing and expanding, which is what dogma can do.
    I find humor in you, I love your posts most times.

    You are one of my sister wives. But you must leave that book outside of the marital home. It is a dogma-free zone and the LDS label is only a guise so HG can have all of us and still suck off the government and get welfare. (this is why they busted Jeff Warren)

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