51 thoughts on “SEDUCTION”

    1. Hello Serene! I highly recommend going back to the archives, especially for the first year. There are many articles HG has more from his experiences (i.e. search for “A Missive from Mother”, that are very insightful to learning about the narcissist’s perspective. Also there is tons of commentary in the comments when HG had more time to have back and forth dialogue with questions and answers that are packed with as much info as the articles themselves. I believe this site can only help be the catalyst for things to start to turn around for you for the better!

      1. Thank you Clarece. I have read many of his books which have been extremely helpful. I enjoy reading more than writing. So I think this will be good for me.

      2. Hi Clarece
        I just commented to Serene before I saw your post and agree to your points. One will also get more of Clarece in the archives, and that is always viewed as a good thing.

      3. Hi Narc Angel! New Gravatar! Nice! Well, it’s a lot more of Clarece, the Hot Mess, that first year. Not sure if that’s a good thing or not. lol But I definitely meant it from getting so much more perspective from HG in the comments back when the blog was smaller.

    2. *whispering* to Serene, I’ll let you in on a little narcsite secret. If you comment in the archives, you won’t be alone over here for long. Have fun!

      1. Well heck. I guess I will join the party. Letter to the narcissist #86 sounds interesting.

    3. Serene
      The archives is a treasure trove of early HG interactions and more personal information on him, as well as background stories and evolution of the different readers over time. Its worth spending time there. Enjoy.

  1. When is book three coming out in America? I am dying to know what happens next. Before I found out you were writing a third book I thought maybe there was intentionally no actual third book so readers would be left without an explanation and confused and have the story just end unexpectedly and abruptly much like narcissistic disengagement itself.

    1. Hello Candice, I can understand why you might think like that but no, there is a third book. It should be released before the end of the year.

  2. HG is there a way how you can tell if re-idealization is coming? My narc went through the neutral period now for quite a long period. And now he has become slightly nicer and talking a bit more. What should I read into this behavior?

  3. Sir Tudor: I am very much enjoying your blog. The candor, the exquisite writing, the intelligence,…….the list goes on. Now to my question. From the very beginning of my involvement with my first N (online) he introduced himself as a submissive and begged to serve me as his ” goddess”. He was instantly smothering me with attention which red flagged me but I was intrigued and amused and agreed to meet him in person. He serviced me to the extent that he could ( limp noodle im afraid), but he enjoyed me administering pain. As the ” relationship” continued his mask slipped several times and i called him on it. He of course denied, discarded, hoovered, etc. After more than a year and a half filled with several absences/discards he finally said that he was tired and that he had never said that to anyone. Followed by: I am as you say I am. Is it possible to be submissive sexually as an N or was that all an act? I was always unsure as it would seem unlikely for him to be able to give up control but he seemed to enjoy it. I enjoy the interactions for the most part and when i do not i cut him off but he always comes back for fuel. is the sex the fuel? Or is that all a hoax?

    1. Thank you for your kind words NA. Yes, the Victim Narcissist would behave in the manner that you have described. You can read much more about it in Sex and the Narcissist.

      1. Hi Serene
        I have read Seduction and Sex and The Narcissist (albeit some time ago) and enjoyed them both. As I recall, Seduction gave a very good picture of the relationship unfolding (the salami slicing), and S & the N I believe is required reading (especially for those in an intimate relationship with a narc). I think I will read them again. Thanks for the reminder of Seduction.

    2. I don’t know
      If you will see this message since it is an archive. But maybe someday someone will.

      This series had me guessing who the narcissist and who the real victim was. Kind of like the Classroom Narcissist article.

      I just kept thinking that there was going to be a twist to the story and somehow it was going to have a surprise ended. And my guess would be wrong.

      It was like watching a thriller trying to figure out who the killer is and then at the end I am shocked at how far off I was.

      I would like to know what school cadre is the narcissist in the series? And what school of empath is the victim?

      My guess is that the narcissist is a Mid-Range somatic.

      Then again I read the book over a year ago. And I have learned a lot since then. Maybe if I go back and reread it I will see red flags that I didn’t see the first time.

      I really enjoyed that series. I like the writing style.

    3. Hey, NA, I assume this was your first comment in HG’s blog.

      Question: when will you deactivate your drama shield and join the “party” again?

      Just kidding.
      XX

      Serene, sorry to disturb.

      1. Hi Lou
        Ah, I mistakenly thought my first post was on The Relational Tower Nov 2016 but I see I have been here a bit longer. Time flies. The shield was put in place around my spot while I stepped out to have my habit double starched. Do you find it more approachable?

      2. NA, both, the shield and the habit, scare me equally. LOL.

        Seriously, the shield is more humorous, therefore, I guess more approachable.

        But I like Catwoman too.

      3. Lou,
        No worries. That’s what I get for hanging out in the seduction archive putting out the vibe.
        I attracted a few empaths and zero narcissists. So it must be a good day.

        NA,
        Thank you for your response.

      4. Serene, I have not read yet the Disorder series, but I believe it was intended to be three books. Until now, two have been published and there is a third one still to come.

  4. 4 weeks huh? The test of patiences, HG this is like a child waiting for Christmas.
    Love the book, my imgination ……

  5. I dig this presentation of your 📚.. when is it ur next new release coming and which one?

    I used to be in a marching band and had the drum line directly behind me in line. Brought back that lovely feeling of the drum line’s driving heat pounding through my stomach.

    1. Hi Indy, thank you. There are a few which are nearing completion but I don’t know which one will necessarily appear first. Currently jockeying for position are Will He Hoover Me? Narcissist:Unmasked, The Lesser Narcissist and How To Flush Out the Narcissist.
      I liked your last line in particular.

  6. I am enjoying the videos. Loved the two books in the series. Any release date yet for the third? I want to know the ending.

      1. Hey HG, any novel in the works where the NPD is a man? For now, enjoying Wynne and Ashleigh’s tale, poor guy 🙂

  7. Sweetie, seduction has ALWAYS been dangerous. You may think seduction is about you getting me into bed, you one-track-minded man, but seduction is really about me getting you…where I want you; to do what I want you to do for me WHEN I want you to do it; to come when I call you; to be where I tell you to be. Oh sure, I let you get me into bed and you think you seduced me, that’s what I WANT you to believe. As long as you think you’re getting your way and having the upper hand, you won’t feel me pulling your strings.

    1. True . Cara . When a man goes on a date he wonders if he’s going to get lucky, the woman already knows. 🙂

    2. Hi Cara. Do female narcs target men who are empathetic? Or do you also enjoy narcissistic men? It must be more challenging, because its harder to find subservient men. Is it a constant battle on who wears the pants in the relationship?

      1. Female narcissists seek out what we need. If a woman is a victim narcissist, she’ll find a man to victimize her, and she’ll play the victim as long as she can.

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