The Narcissistic Truths – No. 52

you-didnt-do-what-i-wanted-again

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27 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Truths – No. 52”

  1. HG, Just started reading your blog and I’m blown away. You are blatantly honest, as a recovered Codependent you send shivers down my spine. I thought I knew an awful lot about your kind since both of my parents are Narcissists as well as many family members. ❤️ your blogs, you continue to educate me. Please continue to help all of us who need to know the Truth in order to heal. Keep it coming.

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  2. Oh HG, this pic says so much! Now, from a distance and getting the real/true perspective, I’m remembering occasions when my ex would act like this. And not only when he was upset, but also when he was “happy” with something I’d done. Many times I thought to myself I was dealing with a 5 y.o. child. It’s interesting because the image doesn’t make me feel mad. It makes me feel sorry. Sometimes, I think he didn’t want a partner, a lover or a girlfriend. He wanted me to be his mother. I know it may sound crazy, but this is how I feel now. Cheers!

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    1. Marcella, I’ve played the role of mommy to perfection. I did a much much better job at nurturing them than any of their narc mothers ever could. Yet they don’t want a loving caring nurturing person. I believe deep down they want you to be the same cold-hearted b*tch that their mother was.

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      1. I agree, Love. The last one I ran into even used to remark how I look at him the same way his mother does. Every so often he returns for me to criticize him and then leaves. There’s no way he isn’t expecting my criticism, I think he just likes it. What do you think, HG?

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      2. Are you criticising him in a fuel free manner or is he gaining some fuel in the process. If it is the latter, then it is clear why he is doing it. If it is the former, I suspect he is returning in the hope of gaining some fuel and trying to do so and when he fails he backs off but is not learning from the process.

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      3. Thank you for your input, HG. I might give him a little fuel if he is reluctant to speak with me, but once I get him talking the fuel stops and I deliver only criticism until he explodes and finally blocks me again. I also tease him about not being able to conquer me.

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      4. Aha that is why he comes back because of the Teaser Fuel you are providing him, you rascal. I suspect your behaviour will be an agenda item at the next meeting of Narc Club.

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      5. 😂😂😂😂 what’s teasing fuel? Seriously HG you craic me up… terrible to laugh at such a horrific set of circumstances but you have to see the humour I guess.

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      6. Teasing Fuel is offering a little to gain out interest and then cutting off the supply before we can gain any more, leaving us frustrated. Akin to a prick tease dear Em.

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      7. Lol it will be one of the first matters to be disgust. What can I say, I’ve been schooled by the greatest.

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      8. Hi Love,
        I also felt I was playing the mother many times. I feel the exact way. I was the most loving, caring, supportive person she could have wanted. It wasn’t going to be good enough. I gave and gave and got nothing but heartache.

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      9. Hi Snow. Yes, it is heartache for us because we can never right the wrongs of their past. You are a very loving and nurturing soul…. It was her privilege to be in your life.

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      10. Awwwww, thanks Love
        That was nice of you to say. Made me cry❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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  3. HG I’ve heard you mention before that you would never admit to being a narcissist in your ‘real life’. Presumably some of your fuel sources have figured out your true nature and confronted you? I have two questions related to that, firstly is the fuel less satisfactory after the source has figured out why the crazy behaviour was happening (I know from my own personal feeling, I can’t imagine anything my narc could say now that would get a rise from me, I genuinely feel No anger, similar to dealing with a child) so would that make my fuel less toxic or not fuel at all (Hopefully the latter😂😂😂)

    And also is someone from the real world realised what you are and asked you, not in an accusation fashion but more in total facinastion, maybe appealing the the narcissistic side of you… at the end of the day it takes a highly intelligent person to do what you do, especially at the level you are at, im thinking most dictators are a similar personality type not to mention political figures, so it’s clearly a high functioning condition, would you enjoy having someone to talk to about it, some who is a friend not a doctor..

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    1. Hello Em, only a handful have done so. The first and most important, who put me on the path to knowing what I am was discarded but explained to me my behaviours and then moved out of reach. There was no fuel to garner thereafter. With the others, they had their suspicions but were wide of the mark and of course I just delighted in denying their accusations. Of course they did not understand the issue of fuel therefore they reacted and provided me with fuel. The difference is you understand what you became entangled with but you also understand the dynamic as well.

      I would happily talk to anybody about my brilliance, but my narcissistic sociopathy is reserved for a couple of select places.

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      1. When I informed my cerebral narc of his personality disorder, he took it quite well and even agreed he’s a cluster B. Yet he said he was actually a histrionic. Lol! I wish!

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      2. Really? I thought he was giving himself way too much credit calling himself a histrionic. I would take a histrionic any day over his boring cerebral self. At least I would have a fun filled ride of drama, theatrics, and sexcapades.

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  4. Can narcissists admit to their wrongdoings and vulnerabilities outside of looking for fuel or pity? Can someone who admits to their flaws and who shows compassion still be a narcissist?

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    1. I admit to my wrongdoings in this blog but only because it is part of what I must do to secure my aims outside of this blog and because I know that such admissions here will have no impact on what I wish to achieve. Ordinarily, we do not admit them because we do not accept we have any, if we do so, it will be designed to gain fuel and is part of the manipulation. Someone who admits to flaws might be a narcissist because it is part of a façade. Someone who shows compassion might still be a narcissist because it is part of the façade, but that person would not feel compassion.

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