Nobody’s Listening

nobodys-listening

Go on then, tell them all what has happened to you? Go on, here, take my phone and ring my parents, my family and my friends. Ring my colleagues too. Telephone the golf club in fact why don’t you take out an advertisement in a local, no, make it a nationa lnewspaper and tell everybody about how badly you have been treated? Climb on the roof and shout it to the neighbourhood, tell everyone who calls at our door and bellow it to strangers as they walk past. Do it, go on, tell them about. Announce it, broadcast it, transmit it, send it out by mail, e-mail ,message and radio signal. Have it blaring from the radio, repeatedly playing on television, hell I will even let you strap a message to a flock of pigeons and you can let them deliver the news that way. Scrawl how badly you have been treated by me on a piece of paper and wrap it around a brick and hurl it through the window at the police station. Scream it long and loud until you are hoarse. Go on, tell them, tell them all.

Tell my parents about their successful son who has studied hard, achieved brilliant results and now excels at work about what I do? Why don’t you gather all my friends around here and announce to them what a bastard I am? I am sure they will be intrigued to listen to you saying that about their loyal and dependable friend who always makes time for them and has helped them out in repeated ways through his largesse and influence. Pop next door and bang on their front door, explain to them with your wild eyes and even wilder hair what has really been happening? After all, I only every show them friendship and politeness don’t I? I don’t think they have heard me shouting at you (I wait until they are away before I raise my voice) but I know they have heard you ranting and bawling. Go to the local shopping parade and mention to the pleasant lady at the bakery what I really get up to behind closed doors. I am sure she will love to hear you tell her all about the charming man who is her best customer and has arranged for her to supply the restaurant of two of my friends. Call my brother and give him chapter and verse. Oh you can’t because he won’t answer the ‘phone to you anymore will he? I know, head down to the gym and see if you can interest any of the regulars with a hysterical rant about the chap who they all say hello to and who works out quietly and regularly. Type out a memo for my colleagues and circulate it to them. I am sure they will be interested to read all about their boss who holds the keys to their future. Declare it to the group I attend football with, they will want to know all about what I do won’t they? What’s that? These are all my people. At last you have recognised the truth of the matter in between your vile outbursts and hateful comments. I know then, ring up your sister and see what she has to say, mind you, I daresay you won’t want to give her the satisfaction after the way she came on to me would you? Tell your friends all about it. Oh wait, they are now my friends and all they have ever seen is how happy I have made you, the gifts, the trips, the presents and the love. What about the vicar? He will listen to you I am sure. It is what he does after all although what he will make of such slander against a regular attendee at his sermons and generous charity donor remains to be seen.

Do it, grab a loudspeaker, create a banner, haul a message behind an aeroplane and write it in the sand on the beach. Do it in this frenzied manner with words spilling from your twisted mouth, a word salad which makes no sense. I am sure the staccato way you spit out your accusations will be well-received. Make sure they look deep into your crazy eyes when you are talking to them, I want them to see who they are really dealing with. Tell your father will you? Ha, he has put up with this for years and was glad to see you leave home, he told me himself. He knows what a drama queen you are and as for your mother well she hates confrontation and she adores me since she knows just how much I have done for you.

Go on, beat your tiny fists about that façade, see if you can punch some holes in it although I know you will not be able to. Shout and stamp and holler all you like. I will enjoy watching you do that and there will be no favourable outcome for you. You are the crazy one and you are trying to unseat the stable, rational, dependable and ultimately far more likeable me. But you keep trying, it amuses and fuels me as your bloodied hands slap against the façade with no effect and your voice becomes no more than a rasp. I will watch as the hope fades in your eyes to be replaced by fear and incomprehension. Keep trying though, keep going and reinforce what I have already indoctrinated them to believe. They believe me. They won’t believe you.

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22 thoughts on “Nobody’s Listening”

  1. I never thought of talking to his friends, that would be hopeless. But I talked to mine. Most were supportive, although they didn’t really understand, and I am grateful for this. However, a so called “best friend”, although she didn’t like him and ,up to a point, believed me, was convinced I was exaggerating as far as his planning is concerned. She always questioned my thoughts and my knowledge about him (I had studied a lot and could explain a lot). Deep down inside, she thought it was all about me. Me being egocentric and a bit crazy. Me thinking that he was planning every word and every action, direct or indirect, because I felt like the centre of the world. She also couldn’t understand why it was so difficult for me to completely leave him. They never get it. After 35 years of friendship (since school), we don’t talk anymore.

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    1. You know that rings so true, you can feel like hell but somehow no one will believe that these things are cold blooded and you are made to feel paranoid, or loving our conspiracy theories. Even from so called friends or family.There must be something wrong with us right?

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  2. Iam a 36 YEAR SURVIVOR OF YOUR evil twin. Its my 2 sons who are victims of the sick twisted psychopath you enjoy being. Do you have children? If yes why did you ? If no? Why not?
    I need answers from you.
    You could be the only way my sons and my self will be able to SURVIVE THE PSYCHOPATH THAT IS MY EX HUSBAND AND FATHER TO MY SONS.

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    1. Hello Judy, point of order, I am not a psychopath.
      No I do not have children. I decided not to because they would get in the way of what i want to do.
      Ask away, you will find answers here, on the blog and in my books.

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  3. I told everybody . His family . His friends. Co workers and saved all the evidence and showed them to back myself up . I hacked his account and had all of the screenshots of the conversations with him and the other girl . There was no way I was letting him get away with what he did to me .

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    1. Awesome! You can only fight a liar with evidence and facts. This also ensures that he cannot rewrite *your* story.

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  4. Except you’re missing one possibility, that I watched unfold from narc mother, who is also a greater, HG…

    Like yourself, she is highly educated, graduated with honors, dean’s list, exceptional university, etc. She (at one point) held a higher standard career. For 20 yrs.

    Until her fake kingdom came crashing down all around her, at the fault of her own. I watched as it engulfed her. She made a mistake that was fatal to her facade. Irreversible damage.

    Though I warned my family for years what she was really like behind closed doors, they never fully believed me (they do now, however) because I was ‘just a kid’, I’m exaggerating, “that doesn’t sound like your mother”, etc.

    At 55 yrs old, after the death of her father (my grandpa), there was a dispute between her & her siblings over one item. Her mask slipped.. Completely. Off. For hours. She was told “no” to having the item, which she could not handle. A fight erupted, escalated quickly, and her fury could not be caged. She lost control. Words she shouted to her siblings cut like a knife, so much so that the family (close & extended) severed ties with her. She tried (in retaliation) to get her brother fired from his job, which also failed epically. All of this unfolding made her quit her job & move halfway across the country & is isolated now.

    Are you afraid that as you age, that you could make a fatal mistake such as hers?

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    1. Thanks Jamie for sharing that perspective. I am not afraid of me causing such a thing to happen, I am of course wary that someone else might cause the empire to crashing down through their smearing/exposing of me (not my loss one control as you have described in your experience) but of course, outside of here, I would never admit to being concerned that the empire might fall, that just would not do.

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      1. Who has that kind of power to possibly be able to ruin you?
        History has shown us that every great empire will fall.
        May yours will live long and strong.

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  5. Absolutely, HG. Your teachings have taught me to not even try to explain what happened to friends and family anymore. They were clueless. And had silly suggestions.
    Now I just say things didn’t work out and I wish him well. Then quickly change the subject to something more upbeat & positive.
    By you teaching me to do do this, it counteracted his smear and made his smear much less effective on his end.

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  6. My mother in law used to say “you always blame him for everything….” and she would hug her son – ,my h – and tell him she loved him. They are good people my in laws but their first responsibility has always been to their flesh and blood. I understand. I have never told them the nitty gritty of what happened. It wouldn’t be right. It would be pointless. He is their son. They would always believe in him anyway.

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  7. My narcissistic ex never bothered to join my social circle, so he never wholesale charmed any of my friends. The few that did meet him socially sensed something was wrong with him immediately, and then later (when he started isolating me from them) expressed concern about me when I dropped off social media, stopped going to parties, etc. I suspect they had prior experience with his kind and could smell the narcissism dripping off of him from a mile away. Of course while we were still involved I never let on that anything was wrong. But after I gave him the boot, I circled back with those people to tell them “you were right. And how!”

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    1. Interesting experience buttony tundra. He evidently decided that he would be better served by isolating you rather than trying to win them over. I wonder if he gauged it was not worth his while to try. I suspect those that did detect something was amiss had some prior experience. I would be interested to know if any of them described him as a narcissist to you?

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      1. Heh. Well. I have a history of choosing my partners poorly. So my friends (who are a smart lot, indeed) tend to be extra-critical of whoever my latest choice is. So yes, he probably was able to sense that he’d get no play there; they are fiercely protective of me and suspicious of the men I choose. But no, the word they applied to him was ‘psychopath,’ and not as a hyperbole. The hurt side of me loves the ‘psychopath’ label the best, because i perceive it is the worst, lol. But honestly the tactics and relationship patterns of narcs, psychos, and socios are all the same, so the labeling doesn’t matter so much to me.

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  8. Charming isn’t a word I would ever choose to describe Dickula. When he’s on the hunt He def puts on the fake niceties, tells the appropriate lies and can be quite charming on occasion, but never to friends, family or the general public. Of course he is the busiest, most demanding and important man on the planet so he’s usually pissed off, disappointed in and contemptuous of everyone around him for failing to read his mind or be as perfect as he. In his spare time, he enjoys making grown men, (who have the pleasure of working with him) cry, screwing his best friends’ girlfriends, pressuring his married friends to partake of escorts, inserting his penis into anything with a hole and a heartbeat, making his secretary cower under her desk, ignoring his few relatives until he needs something and just being a general dick. People had no problem believing anything I told them.

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  9. Oh my gosh! This is my family. How did you know how dysfunctional we’ve become with my aged malignant narcissist mother? Were you an invisible guest all these years?

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