I am just a baby in your arms. I am fragile, brittle and vulnerable. You see I was broken when I was so, so young. I did not know any different and all I wanted was to be told that I was good. I did everything I could to please them but it was never deemed enough. I don’t know why I could not make them love me but it just did not happen. Perhaps if I had tried harder. I know it is my fault really but I did not know any better. They took something from me, I still do not know what it really is, but I think you do. I think you hold the answer because of who you are. I try to be a good person, I really do but there is just something that stops me from being that decent and compassionate person.ย  I see what you and people like you do and I cannot help but wish I was the same. Sometimes I want it so much it makes me do things I should not do because I cannot control the jealousy that rises and makes me do those Bad Things. Believe me, I fight against it but I have not had the strength to defeat the wickedness but I have you now don’t I? You will shield me and give me the fortitude I require to complete my journey to redemption. Everything that has happened before was borne out of me lacking you. Those things that I have done, well, I am not proud of them but I was weak and knew no better. I did not have you to lead and guide me. The others, you see, those others promised me that they would take care of me but they were just pretenders and charlatans who took from me and left me twisted and beaten in the dust. Sometimes I had to fight back. That was when I struck out at them. I did not want to, truly I did not want to do those things, but sometimes I was given no choice. I know all that has gone now because you are here. You are the person I have waited for for so long. I believe in you and how you can save me. You are my caretaker, my salvation and my rock. I look to you and you give me such hope. You show me that there is a better way, a road that leads to salvation. It is a road that will take me away from the Badlands and the darkness. I understand the road may be long, it may wind through difficult places but ultimately, with you holding my hand, I know that I will reach that place where I need not be afraid any longer. I need not hurt and lash out but instead I can harness the real goodness that is somewhere deep inside me.

You told me that it is there and I believe you. You know about these things. That is the way you have been made. You are the carer, the healer and the peacemaker. You must understand why it is that you are so special to me. You are the only one who truly understands what is to be me and you are the only one who can save me. I will place my heart in your hands and let you care for it. I have been broken, I have been broken for far too long, a shattered and fractured creature who has had to endure living this way without any hope of redemption, until you came along. Please, make me a better person. Please care for me and nurse me and hold my hand when the demons come. I look to you and only you and in those optimistic eyes of yours I find absolution.

All I want is to be loved. It is not too much to ask is it. I am a noble yet broken person and you hold the power to make me what I want to be, what I should be. I am like a baby in your arms. I am vulnerable yet with you there anything becomes possible. I know you will love me, care for me and protect me. You will save me. You are the only one.

You fall for this speech.

Every time.

141 thoughts on “Protection

  1. Entertainment says:

    The reason I asked the questions because I am starting to hear or see narcissism personality disorder every where now. YouTube, other blogs, and Television. I am sure it’s going to end up with the same stigma and misinformation like bi-polar disorder. Which to me is dangerous.

    1. NarcAngel says:

      Do you mean since “The Donald”? In which case the image of the classic loud mouthed asshole will prevail and the other schools and cadres will remain mostly undetected.

  2. Entertainment says:

    When commenter say their narcs showed signs of empathy, shame, or remorse could it be they are not narcs? The emotions they witness are real?
    Could their partners have another disorder with some narcs traits?
    Similar to how you explain Super Empath without the level of empathy.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Empathy can be feigned – I can feign empathy because I understand how to appear concerned. Accordingly, showing signs of empathy is not a determining factor. Empathic actions are more reliable and also when regarded at a particular point in the dynamic.

      1. Entertainment says:

        Thanks HG

        I thought my friend was a mid range narc. I am not sure, we are non intimate. He has shown some traits of narcissistic behavior however he’s shown compassion. I was sick he bought me soup. He collected money from co-workers to help a single mother that work with his company on a temp assignment. She was struggling to buy her kids gifts for Christmas.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I make donations to charity, I am a trustee of a charity, I have lent people money, I organise charity dinners – it is all done to garner fuel and support the faรงade.

          1. Entertainment says:

            I experienced that with the mid to lessor. Community servant, Robin hood type assuring there is media coverage. I’ve gone as far as stop coverage on certain events/ exposure.

            NA, comment shocked me back into reality. The saying ” an idle mind is the devils workshop”has proven true when i have too much free time. (Monkey Brain) ugh. California traffic is horrible and we have strict laws on cell phones. (Parked on highway 1 hour no texting).
            In true narc form, he removed any doubt during the questions. ๐Ÿค”hummm, maybe he’s following you or my disorder is progressing.

        2. NarcAngel says:

          Epic fail!! You know better than that. All facade. Go to remedial class.

          1. Entertainment says:

            Okay, I am highly emotional today. I go from one extreme of trust to distrust. I am sending you my dry cleaning bill. Remedial class it is. I will reread fury and mellow down with a shot of HUSH.

          2. NarcAngel says:

            Re: remedial reading

            Excellently good. Carry on.

  3. Stunted growth says:

    Hi narc angel
    I meant narcissists will use their knowledge of what they know of how people think and behave to take advantage of them as illustrated in the blog not anyone here specifically. Someone with aspergers struggles to understand how people think and behave.
    Ive seen people with aspergers compared or likened to people with npd and i think the two are distinctly different. The only similarity imo is the difficulty with empathy and in a cerebrals case their intelligence. One is a disorder and the other a disability.

    1. NarcAngel says:

      Stunted growth
      Ah. As illustrated in the articles you mean. Thank you for clarifying.

  4. Stunted growth says:

    A friend of mine and me were discussing an ex of hers which has admitted to having aspergers. Hes a doctor of oncology and she described him as having many similarities to another ex of hers who shes sure has npd. Ive worked with children on the autism spectrum and i personally think a someone with asd cant have npd because they dont operate the same cognitively. The person with asd to some degree can lack empathy but every individual is different and some feel very deep empathy(misconception about autism). There is a social impairment and understanding of body language and how people think with asd. Someone with npd especially a greater know all too well peoples minds and take advantage of it. I think theres similarities in stunted emotional development but one is a disability(from birth) and one was a learned disorder and imo someone with npd has higher social awareness and is manipulative. Like in this blog they use their knowledge to take advantage of people. Someone with aspergers wouldnt think to use these same tactics. The two share similarities aspergers and greaters but i think they are polar opposites.

    1. NarcAngel says:

      Stunted Growth

      Who are you referring to as using their knowledge to take advantage of others on this blog? And what specifically is the advantage?

    2. Stunted Growth
      Yeah, what NA asked. I’m trying to understand what was meant there. Jus wonderin.

    3. 1jaded1 says:

      This might get me in trouble…I reapect everyone who posts. People have anger because of their experiences.and HG is nice or kind enough to post them. I have been downrigbt nasty in some of my comments. HG is respectful enough to allow them, even if he has to use his 5 rules.

      Put up or stfu.

  5. Maria says:

    The breeze of another golden period its in the spring blossoms..
    or is it not?
    illusion .. illusion .. illusion.. you are a charming witch..

  6. V says:

    Powerful. Thanks.

    1. HG Tudor says:


  7. Joanne says:

    HG – Do you feel hatred towards your sister since she turned out an empath and you’re a Narc? You’ve mentioned your mother is an elite, so surely she knows what she is and she knows what you are? How do you feel when your mother extracts fuel from you?

    This article was the best, thank you.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      No, it is usually contempt.

      No, you have confused school with cadre. Elite is one of the cadres and means a combination of somatic and cerebral. She is Mid-Range in terms of school which means she does not know what she is.

      Irritated but it does not happen often now.

      You are welcome.

  8. JDiamond says:

    My gosh HG , I had to read this again today . I know my ex narcopath is like your kind , the greater … tactful , words seems to blissfully grow wings as he said them , even facial expressions , could produce a tear if needed … smh I mean damn HG , honestly greatful to you and this site !!! Thank you

  9. Holy Reality says:

    HG …just when I think you’ve reached the pinnacle in your writings. This was the omni of your evil! Fucking brilliant!

  10. G says:

    I don’t how to explain , I felt really inspired for a while. But , it is true it was dark. I left him when I felt I was being consumed by his darkness . But I am much more sensitive now . Sometimes I miss talking to him and I have painted his eyes. But, I have someone else , this other person inspires me even more…

  11. Khaleesi says:

    I used to fall for this every time. That was before I found your writings,

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Seize that power Khaleesi.

  12. CLJ says:

    perhaps it varies, but how long does it generally take you to recognize one of your own kind?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      It does vary, but not long.

      1. CLJ says:

        since it isn’t uncommon to come across non-NPD people with narcissistic traits, how do you distinguish them from fuel seek missiles?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          The lack of empathy.

          1. Lisa says:

            HG, is there a post about lack of empathy on here ?
            I know it sounds dumb but it’s actually very hard to know if someone actually lacks empathy ?
            Empathy can be faked it’s also easy to confuse it with sympathy and narcs can for example love animals .
            Do you have a check list regarding is empathy present or not ?
            To distinguish traits versus narc and empathy being the deciding factor ?
            Thank you

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Many of my posts demonstrate the lack of empathy but I have not written about a check list. The article the Three Strands of Empathy gives you more information about the types which exist and that one of those strands, cognitive empathy can be faked by some of our kind but the other two strands cannot. One of the key determinants is the actions shown rather than what is said.

          3. Lisa says:

            I found the empathy posts thank you

      2. CLJ says:

        are you saying that upon close observation the facade won’t cover the deficit completely? even with Greaters?

  13. Wow, that was truly powerful and certainly resonated with me.

  14. Mark says:

    We have a word in Ireland….. Bollocksology. It’s meaning is self evident. The x is attempting this maneuver on me and I am entirely unmoved. If she was on fire I would toast marshmallows. I fear, as Nietzche warned, that in fighting monsters I have become one myself.

    1. ava101 says:


    2. Windstorm says:

      Have you read the posts on weaponizing empaths?

    3. ava101 says:

      Which part of Ireland are you from?

  15. Maria says:

    I think the same many times..
    HG and my Narc is one and the same
    More or less…

    1. Star says:

      its unnerving and makes me feel ill and repulsed; yet at the same time, fasinated and in awe of the manipulations/thinking patterns. So grateful for HG’s honest perspective though . It helps see the truth of who we were really dealing with.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        A constructive and honest approach Star.

      2. Maria says:

        Yes Star
        and that is the most unshakeable dangerous addictive part : the fascination we feel towards our Narcs.
        From going with a decisive NO contact and with a confidence in a final END to the hell on earth… to, now, wanting to “conquering” him.. ๐Ÿ˜œ
        And now I feel i am starting to be caught up again in his claws.. and why?
        Because, i started to listen to his fascinating declarations and promises again..
        a dangerous tangle- trapping words.

        1. Star says:

          That is very well put Maria and so true… but I sincerely hope you don’t fall back into that trap

      3. Maria says:

        i had fallen for him again..
        He is too persuasive and charming… and i am too addicted..
        i avoid to look at the reality, and gaze at the magnificient mask..
        and down and down i go in the spiral of despair, in the abyss of delusion ..

  16. Carroll says:

    Hello HG, it seems The first part was true, but the pleading speech was fake…have you ever been married? What’s the longest relationship you’ve ever been in?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Yes I have. Four years.

      1. Ms brown says:

        if i may ask…. Did you initiate divorce or did she? then once you answer I will have more questions ๐Ÿ˜‰

        1. HG Tudor says:

          She did.

          1. Ms brown says:

            I she hadn’t taken the initiative, to file, would you have? If no, why? If yes, at what point? Thank you (as my comments/questions await moderation) โš”

          2. HG Tudor says:

            It would have depended on the circumstances and whether it suited my purposes to do so. I may have chosen to dis-engage with her, separate but not divorce as a means of maintaining a hold.

          3. Ms brown says:

            Thank you! This pertains to my situation and the reason I had to ask you…

    2. Maria says:

      Did you had other intimate partners when married ?

      1. HG Tudor says:


  17. abrokenwing says:

    This is so convincing. It touches my deepest wounds, I know this pain from my own experience therefore my natural reaction is to show understanding and compassion. I’ d rather be labeled gullible than become brutally cynical. Well, the lesson to learn is to be sincere but don’t be gullible..but I can’t change myself. In order to protect ourselves we should not let anyone get too close to us.Having feelings for someone gives power and control over us to this person , makes us weak and vulnerable . We expose ourselves to get hurt again. Can not let this happen.

    1. sarabella says:

      I lived most of my life like that. Thanks to many reasons. It got me nowhere but actually made me more vulnerable to boys bearing speach like this. The solution seems more in learning to ID good people ?

      1. abrokenwing says:

        ..and aren’t they best at pretending they’re good people Sarabella? Coming to us disguised as everything we have ever wanted? You have to give someone a chance , go through the golden period as in every relationship and only then you may ,may not find out if there might be a happy ending.. And if not? It’s already too late. The price you have to pay is too high. Personally I won’t take a risk cos the truth I learned about myself is that for some reason ( and it is my fault) I am ONLY attracted to narcisstist. Unfortunately.

        1. sarabella says:

          That’s true. I am definitely seeing a pattern of them in my life in various forms… friends, partners, work peers I align myself with. I think I did something odd. My dad is not a narc but very funny, social, outgoing but empathic and self-aware. Mother is the narc but they didn’t stay married. but cold, critical, shallow, withhoding, scapegoated me. So, what did I did? I took both of them and came up with a personality type in one…. malignant narcs. Nice way to resolve family tension and crisis, huh?

    2. Entertainment says:

      Say it loud….no conscience, or remorse and you are proud. Your poor victims will confirm this and so much more to be true.
      When someone shows you who they are BELIEVE them.

  18. Twilight/Dawn says:

    This reinforces something, tugs at that place that would do anything to help heal what was done.

  19. A.R. says:

    And to hell with you & the crutch you hobbled in on

    1. NarcAngel says:

      To be fair AR, I believe HG was already here. It was you that hobbled in angry and injured into his house making accusations about being ignored. I have many posts in moderation but I dont make Narc-like demands to have them answered immediately. I wait like everyone else.

  20. Jen says:

    Powerful, HG! The first part of this post definitely touched me. I ask, though, is that not how narcs really feel inside–that they (you) were “broken” at a young age and need saved? Or is this just gaslighting? In other words, do narcs know how they became the way they are? Do they have that kind of insight and awareness?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Generally it is gas lighting.

      1. Jen says:


  21. ava101 says:

    My ex was so unconvincing at this type of speech, and I looking so ennerved that he couldn’t keep it up and had to laugh himself. Every time.

  22. ava101 says:

    HG, do you know sentiments like hope, expectations, and dreams (of future)? And your post has a lot to do with your beliefs.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I know hope but I prefer not to rely on it at all. Hope causes problems. I have expectations most definitely, although it would be more accurate to describe them as demands. I do not dream of the future.

      1. ava101 says:

        Wow, thank you.

        1. HG Tudor says:


      2. Do you not dream of the future because you make it happen?
        Did you have dreams of what you wanted your life to be in your childhood? Did you get to decide your life or did your parents? Did they decide your siblings lives?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I focus on the now and influencing what will come to pass, dreaming about the future is pointless and achieves nothing.
          Deciding your life is something of an amorphous concept since there are multiple factors that contribute to what constitutes your life – how you behave, what you do, what your career is, where you live, who you fraternise with, what your views are, how you conduct yourself.

          1. Let me clarify as usual. Did they try to decide what direction they wanted you to go in, such as we want you to take these courses in school, go to this college, get into this field of work, be friends with this class of people, etc. As they know what is best for you and their knowledge of what you should be or do is superior so you should listen to them when they advise you about such things. The dreaming part is did you say for example, I want to do this when i grow up and they told you either why you could not, thus squashing your dream or told you could but it’s not a very good idea. Kid has to do what parent says then does it, it’s wrong, kid switches up and is still wrong. Can’t dream because your dreams don’t match narcissists view of what you would like from the future or life. Did they encourage competition between your siblings and you? Like Rachael is doing this and you aren’t or Lennox did better on this than you…etc?

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Clarification was required because as pointed out the question was wide-ranging and amorphous.
            Yes they provided direction in respect of the options taken at school, A levels studied and degree course. With regards to the university there were only ever two which would be acceptable.
            Yes there was competition between us.
            I do not recall having a dream of what I wanted to do when I grew up. I have been told by other family members of things which were apparently said when very young which many children say – astronaut, professional footballer, stunt man and such like. They wanted me to pursue a particular profession and initially I saw the merit in doing so but as time went on I decided that was not going to be the case so I chose a different one.

          3. Thanks for answering HG. I’m glad you got into one of the two. O I think instead of C. Sorry that competition was put between your siblings and you. This divides. You would have been great at any of those childlike desires for a career. Narc Parents sometimes would be angry that you didn’t choose what they wanted you to do. Did you feel better when you got to decide your career path yourself?

          4. HG Tudor says:

            I felt more in control.

      3. Ms brown says:

        wasn’t it Shakepsere that said ” “Expectation is the root of all heartache.” and Buddah “No Expectations, no Disappointment” Im saying I agree with you in the sense of living in the present, because that is what “IS”… (“I do not dream of the future”….. This can actually be a HEALTHY way of living life

        1. Twilight/Dawn says:

          Expectation is the first step to disappointment, hard lesson to learn

  23. ana says:

    This is something that needs to be shared with every empath and codependent. This is cognitive dissonance, which we take years to try to resolve, and lose ourselves in the process. As compassionate people, it is virtually impossible to believe that you are wired this way. Do you really have no conscience at all?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I have none. My victims will confirm that too.

      1. Entertainment says:

        Say it loud….no conscience, or remorse and you are proud. Your poor victims will confirm this and so much more to be true.
        When someone shows you who they are BELIEVE them.

      2. MLA - Clarece says:

        In the earlier blog days, you used to write more articles about past girlfriends and the different scenarios that would play out. These gave great examples of typical interactions we could be exposed to. For instance, faking a knee injury with Karen on a ski trip with friends so she would stay back at the lodge and care for you and not spend one minute on the slopes.
        Will you have more articles in the future like that?
        In fact, I remember at one time, weren’t you going to try to pursue your married neighbor, Fiona?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Plenty to come on both fronts.

          1. Entertainment says:

            I don’t think we are ready.๐Ÿ˜ถ

          2. NarcAngel says:

            Then go have a nap or do some stretches ’cause the rest of us are lol.

            Seriously though, I feel a little conflicted about it sometimes when we ask HG questions about his personal relationships (and yes Ive asked plenty). When he offers the information okay, but when we ask it sometimes feels to me like weve crossed a boundary from education to almost voyeurism. It feels like we are violating that woman again by having her pain or shame exposed (although we dont know her), and overriding the empathic belief of privacy in a relationship. HG is told how he should develop more intimate feelings toward his partner (plural lol), but then we want to know all about them. I understand he seems to have no issue with relaying that information but Im not sure why we want to know specifically the names and the events We would be horrified if it were our story exposed in such a public and callous way would we not? Also on occasion when he is away from the blog for a bit (and it is never long), we marvel that he sleeps so little and encourage him to work on his issues and cultivate ferlings, but want to know where he is if he misses the blog a day. When is he suppose to have this life and these feelings we keep going on about that hes missing? Its no wonder he relates to being a machine. Im not defending HG as he will do what he likes (I am always clear on that), I am identifying that we seem to be a little contrariwise ourselves sometimes. I still havent conveyed this to my liking but just some thoughts Ive had for what theyre worth.

          3. Entertainment says:

            No naps, those are on my bucket list. However, I will stretch and meditate.

            HG, has revealed some of the most vile and cruel things he’s done or said to his victims. My eyes may roll further back than yours when I read some of the comments. Some are in shock, and some triggers are so strong reality escapes them.
            For the most part is entertaining, they change their name to lash out at him as though he’s said or done something new.
            I do feel bad for some of the newcomers most are bewildered. However, a large number of them take the horrific information they receive and use it to begin healing and accepting this will be the only real closure they will receive.
            I really don’t care if he shares are not I am numb to narc tactics in a healthy way.๐Ÿ˜‰

  24. narrow escape says:

    You are the one… The one and only. Fate has finally brought you in my life. Stay only if you are strong enough to give me your 100%. If you have come to stay, stay thru good n bad. If you have come to go, go now… God has sent you to me.You are my salvation…

  25. A.R. says:

    Or of our own volition

  26. A.R. says:

    Excuse me while I gag on this redderick. No one, I mean no one person can save another no matter how desperately they may plead to be “fixed”. The work of the journey belongs to each individual themselves.
    I held on to the primal fantasy of taming the tiger. I believe it’s what we do as human beings because we want to say we are the ones that inspired, taught, or have what another human being needs. And sometimes it happens, but not of our own accord or of own volition.
    If a narcissist wishes to truly see the other side of being a narcissist, the path exists for each and every one of them to choose a different behaviour. The utter nonsense of being genius & not taking or choosing another path is simply abhorrent!! It defies the definition of genius. Perhaps this so called genius lies in the heart of rainman than Einstein.
    Since my break up with the last narcissist & since realizing I was preened from birth to be a beacon to narcissists, (nevermind I’ve been ignored each time I’ve asked Mr. Tudor a question)..The situation comes to light that if the narcissist cannot or will not change, then it is up to those of us afflicted with attracting narcissists to take our own hand & seek the help necessary to invoke change so that arrogant men such as the author will no longer be able to sign off his articles with: you fall for this speech. Every time.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Don’t be too concerned about me ignoring your questions AR, I mean, it’s not as if I answer scores of them every day is it? You are always welcome to ask again.

    2. G says:

      They will never change because NPD is emotional retardation ..

    3. Entertainment says:

      This is not a narcissists please for help or a savior.
      This is part of the facade, their perspective and unrealistic expectations they project on their victims.
      They don’t seek protection not in this sense. They want to protect the facade, run from unveiling. None of what they seek can be obtained because it’s not real. This is their reality, the only truth is that they envy what we have and hate us for it.

  27. 1jaded1 says:


  28. Star says:

    Seriously do you guys follow some sort of book? Almost word for word things he would say or write to draw me back in. If you didn’t live in England and myself in Canada.. I would swear you were the same man.Thank you again HG! Absolute genius writing.

  29. Hijinks says:

    I had a feeling it was going to end that way…

  30. Dragonfly says:

    I was waiting for the “JUST KIDDING!”

  31. Nope. You lost your innocence along time ago. I would never believe that. I go in looking for the lie. I know it’s there, that’s why you are never getting my heart. You get a facade. Works well for both of us. Cognitive dissonance fixes all.

  32. livegoddess says:

    until sadly, I cannot convince myself anymore. until I see myself performing a part in a play I had never auditioned for.

  33. Ms brown says:

    indeed, i was falling, again…

    1. G says:

      It would not work with me! I was with him because I have a submisse personality and it was good for my art.

      1. Really? I’m in the arts to a certain extent and since I’ve been with my raging narcissist, my art has taken a very dark turn. It’s not what I want to put out into the world at all. And I wasn’t all sunshine and moonbeams before him either. Too dark, too dark, too dark.

      2. Entertainment says:

        Yes, that’s what we tell ourselves. The art of submission and empathy. Face it we were conned, scammed, swindle all in the pursuit of love.

        The art of deceiving oneself is dangerous. Pride before destruction.

  34. Lisa says:

    HG, what’s the update with the good doctors are you still seeing them ? Do they still believe you can be fixed ? Do you think your any closer ?
    Of course we know you don’t want to be fixed and you don’t feel you need to be fixed as you are a perfect specimen ๐Ÿ˜œ
    I just wondered about the therapy in general ?
    Do you think therapy can change a narcissist , particularly a lesser or mid.
    One that is accepting of the fact that he is one ?
    Any thoughts ?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Hello Lisa,

      1. Yes I am.
      2. They maintain the belief that I can make significant improvements in terms of my behaviour and also through a process of sustained deconstruction of the construct.
      3. No, the Lesser and the Mid do not know what they are therefore they will not alter. A Greater is actually more likely to make alterations, assuming they see a need to do so.

      1. NarcAngel says:

        Hard to know what the good Drs believe or think can be acheived when there is significant money involved. Not to cast aspersion on the entire mental health industry, but when someone is in treatment not by their own choice with payment from another source, it must be very tempting not to rush things. Money always changes the game. Color me jaded.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I agree, I am aware of this factor.

        2. Twilight/Dawn says:

          Lol money and Doctors, for many it is a business and not a practice to heal or help. IMO and dealings with many doctors.
          Yet I am sure they are acquiring a wealth of knowledge from you HG.

      2. Entertainment says:

        In your case you have mentioned you don’t feel the need to change as what you do works for you. I am sure you obtain a much higher level of fuel from the doctors than you are willing to admit. The grandiose thinking (albeit your are intelligent ) view doctor’s as beneath you and I am sure you could do their job more efficent and better. (Perception) I see your behaviour changing as your body and mind starts deterioration due to age.

        It’s my opinion that in the past npd rarely was diagnosed in people. Now, I think the psych community is over diagnosing. Most people personality disorders and anti social disorder that similar narc traits but it doesn’t mean that are narc or sociopath. I read some of the comments about shame, remorse, or bouts of empathy.
        HG, do you think that the reason most may have witnessed this is because they are not narcs/sociopath but have other disorders with subcarries from other diagnosis?
        The info you give is from your experience with your kind. Thus, if the shoe fits apply it.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Can you clarify your question please?
          When you write “most may have witnessed it” do you mean the victims or the disordered person?
          Do you mean they “have other disorders” do you mean the victims or the disordered person?

          1. Entertainment says:

            Sorry, I am literally sitting in California traffic๐Ÿ˜ŠWe haven’t moved in 20 minutes.
            The disorder person can have traits of NPD however it does not mean they are narcs correct?

            I can’t see the post right now. I have no idea what the other question was. Both, I am sure both were in reference to the disorder. I was diagnosed with borderline personality and was recently told I also exhibit traits from subgroups (other disorders).

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Yes that is correct Entertainment. A person may have narcissistic traits but not have NPD.
            Has the traffic moved yet?

          3. Entertainment says:

            Regarding traffic after 30 minutes we were usher off the highway a semi overturned. Of course I returned home couldn’t face the world with my level of frustration๐Ÿ˜Š

      3. Lisa says:


        Hmmm I have to agree I also have my suspicions about therapy and have read a few articles , where numbers of people working in this field , 100 percent admit that they have never actually cured anyone of any personality disorder.
        I’m not saying talking to someone may not be very helpful and even alter someone’s thinking but unless the disordered person wants to change and is willing to alter these behavioural patterns and work on it constantly for the rest of there lives , they can just tell a therapist any old nonsense and of course the practises will continue to take the clients money .
        This question of traits versus actually being a narcissist is still very difficult to distinguish , I don’t really know how it ever can be .
        If empathy can be faked and really anything could be faked ? It’s impossible to ever know ?

  35. JDiamond says:

    My God HG … wow… and no empathy at all while saying this knowing you are not feeling a word you verbally say to us ?

  36. Pam says:

    I hate it… but I know you are right and I do fall for this speech every time

  37. barbiegirl34 says:

    BRAVO HG!!! Thank you for your warnings.. I had just got a text from my narc/misogynistic sociopath (apparently I like to touch hot burners) 30 mins before I saw your email notification and that’s God talking to me through you even though I know you’re not a believer. He used you to tell me where evil is lurking. His words were pretty much the same as what your email said so I thank you for posting this at the most perfect time ever!! Your warnings are so much appreciated. He unfollowed you on my phone while I was sleeping a month ago but I figured it out pretty quick when you were gone and I didn’t see my warning emails anymore. Thanks again for your dr or whatever else promotes you to warn the public of the danger ahead. Tonight was VERY much needed and within minutes!

    1. Jen says:

      That brings up a good point. HG, are you atheist? Would you say most, or all narcs are atheist? Because, my narc is an atheist. Not to generalize or simplify, but I am curious about the correlation. Thanks.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        It depends on whether I need to be one nor not.

  38. Angelina says:

    Good Evening HG,

    I must admit, you have taught and enlightened me more in one afternoon than in the past several months . I have perused nearly every website relating to narc disorder. Your verbiage is impeccable. I was constantly referring to my dictionary for guidance, go you. Aside from your steroid induced vocabulary, you are the creature I was married to for nearly 33 years (2 days shy).
    I wish to thank you for your insight into the cerebral workings of a narcissist. I no longer consider myself a victim, I am and will forever consider myself a survivor. Yes, you are a challenge and yes , you will be hiding in the shadows for as long as I live. You did not defeat me. For 33 plus years you were teaching me without your consent. I do know you. I know all your moves. Yes, our life is a chess game, only I am 3 moves ahead of you. You will not defeat me. I already won.

    Sleep well…

  39. jojometoo says:

    Awe hell no !!!

  40. WEB says:

    Not any more.

  41. Amber says:

    Do you feel anything when you see a baby? Only one person can save you. ๐Ÿ˜‰ he already did. You just have to believe. ๐Ÿ’•๐ŸŽ‡

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Revulsion usually

      1. serious?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Am I serious about what ED?

          1. about being repulsed by babies??

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Yes. Thanks for clarifying.

      2. You’re welcome.. though I feel you revel at shocking us.
        Also, I’ve been making many comments everywhere and I feel like I’ve been subjected to a rather harsh silent treatment by you, until today.
        To be honest, it makes me feel sad, because I would like to be friends with you, online only, maybe meet for a cup of five o’clock tea when I’m in London some time in the future… but… I don’t feel the ST pain anymore, because I expect it.
        So I think talking is more productive that way.
        I’m sorry I know I said I had no time to expand my comment on literature, I felt i need to process everything again, the knew understanding takes a toll on me emotionally. I’ve got to take serious steps to change my life, and it’s all overwhelming.
        Somehow I can’t stop absorbing everything you write and record.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Thank you for your opinion. I do not need to shock people here because the responses are low in fuel potency. I am delivering you the truth. If I really wanted to shock you because I revelled in doing so, there is much i could tell you in that regard.
          You have not been subjected to any silent treatment. I have no need of doing that because nobody on this blog is known to me and would thus merit devaluation. I do see that certain people (and it is because of the way that they are) perceive unfavourable treatment at times, but that is wholly incorrect. First of all, I have no need to do so. Second the 5 rules acts against this. Thirdly, if your posts have not appeared/been answered, do understand you are not the only one who experiences this (there are hundreds of comments every day and as I am an Army of One there will be delays in dealing with them). As I often explain, posts that are longer, have questions, have given me cause to reflect on their content can be in moderation for some time.
          Naturally I understand why you may take the view hence why I have explained why it is incorrect so you and other readers understand.

      3. I wanted to quote you but you must have installed an anti copy plugin, which is fair ofc, I do the same on mine.
        I bet you have much to shock us with..
        low potency fuels eh, but not in mind games with a super empath, your words and I’m a quick apprentice

  42. You got me. I fell for that shit. Just when I think I’m getting stronger I fall for the words every time.

  43. Wait…so you’re not happy just the way you are? Did I just believe more narc word vomit?

  44. amsodone says:

    Another window, and yikes; although was a different presentation and vernacular – I fell for so many aspects.
    I can and will see this one coming no matter how is posed. Thanks HG

  45. IntelAvatar says:

    Emotional intelligence can be nurtured in anonymous groups where the majority create a safe container. You might stop by to peak in and inspect the fuel potential. If you make it a habit, one day, as if out of the blue, you gain a couple of chakras. I agree it doesn’t happen often. But it does happen.

  46. chaos says:

    HG you are a genius . Sad but true ..

  47. aww… ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
    yes, my ex would post a lot of baby pictures on his Facebook, and act innocent like a little boy, and yes I fell for it, but deep down it is the truth, your human part is forever a little baby, the Creature takes the rest of the space..

    1. Mine sent me so many bans and little boy pics too. He’d say he just loved that I was so delighted with them because his cruel abusive wife wasn’t interested. I was such an idiot.

      1. Correction “baby” not bans

  48. Dory says:

    I’ve just died a little. ๐Ÿ˜”

  49. Cordelia says:

    Is it a lie?

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