The Narcissistic Truths – No. 79

everyone-sees-what-i-showfew-know-what-i-hide

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52 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Truths – No. 79”

  1. NarcAngel,

    Once upon a time…long ago…I had a sex drive. Can you please lend me yours? It appears mine has disappeared since dealing with my mid-range narc.

  2. You guys are aiming too low. Nothing beats a handbag made from foreskin. And as a bonus, if youre carrying a lot of stuff you can rub it and it gets bigger.

    1. NarcAngel,

      I was drinking coffee while reading your comment. I almost spit it out all over my keyboard.

      1. Dr HQ
        True story.

        A guy in my office once, going on to a small group of men about how special and expensive his boots were (snakeskin). I am passing by and he proudly says to me: Hey NA, bet youve never seen a pair of boots like these eh? I stopped, leaned down to inspect, and then replied all serious: Youre right. Is that foreskin? If theyre tight I can rub them for you until they fit better-just let me know. Then I walked away to the sound of laughter.

        Men are usually nice to me.

  3. Oh yes, so brilliant again, you handsome, powerful Dexter-esk, Luciferian character, you. Please allow me to stroke your ego via incessant sugar-coated ass kissing some more. I look like an innocent little angel right now, with big tear-stained eyes and a giant sparkly bow on my head…

    Or I look like a hardcore streetwise, ball-crushing female gangster in tight pants and stilettos with amo strapped to my sexy hips.

    🍒🍒🍒🍒🍭🍭🍭😘😘😘

    Whatever you want baby…. just buy me an MK handbag so I can advertise for some bitches.

    1. Come n GetIT

      Girl you better demand a YSL and Chanel for the crazy you are gonna be put through lol!

  4. The accuracy! A childhood friend (who I recently discovered is a narc) said the same thing this week almost verbatim about his life on social media.

    He is a great friend but a horrible husband, boyfriend, to his victims.I never realized that he had the same traits as the narc I was involved with. We have caught him in so many unnecessary lies but just thought he exaggerated things. Thanks to the information provided in from the blog I am able to evaluate his behavior and handle him accordingly.

  5. You are not the only to hide things from the world.
    There are empaths that hide many traits they have, not because they are dishonest but I believe it is due to the way society would view them.
    Look at the women burned in Salam for being witches, very well could have been very gifted empaths and some very jealous your kind controlling the crowds and the way things appear.

    1. Twilight
      Oooh! I totally agree with you, here. I’ve joked from my teens that if I was open about my beliefs, people would run away making the sign of the cross! 😝

      1. Windstorm2
        That is freaking hilarious 😂!!!!
        Closed minds vs open minds

        My mentor would tell me when I was younger, “Willow trust in yourself, not in others.” They said many confusing things to me then that actually make sense today. The seeds planted into children do grow when watered.

      2. Twilight
        “The seeds planted into children do grow when watered.”

        That is too true. That’s why as parents we have to be sure just what seeds we’re planting. HG’s Little Acons are all seeds as well.

      3. Yes they are and even these are planted, it is a choice which will be water which is seen as the child grows

      4. Yeah…I definitely relate to that statement.

        Lololol

    2. My ex used to say (and I actually agreed w/ this one statement of his) that I would have been burned alive during the Salem Witch Trials.

      1. Lol Dr I know I would have been. I see the world different.
        If I could give it away I would.

      2. Twilight,

        That’s exactly why I keep a few sociopaths, psychopaths, and narcissists around – not in a romantic sense though.

      1. 12345
        Not sure those two things are incompatible. Just depends on your point of view.

      1. Thx. Now the question is how is it I’m empathic but get self esteem by external sources? I feel happy when others are happy. Sad when they are sad. Is that just mirroring? I truly wish to give others happiness, but I do feel empty inside. I feel kind of like a blank space that imprints with whatever anyone needs it to be. I’ll become what you need to make you happy. To please you and get approval from you. Mid range? But then why do I feel bad for the gay whale 🐳?

      2. Very true. That’s why we attract each other so well. We radiate it out and you all need to draw it in.

      3. Why are you so sure about that, HG? I believe the self esteem of the two “groups” is only based on different dogmas. The self-confidence of your kind is grounded in the belief system that you are superior and a better manipulator than everyone else. If your kind suffers any failure, the self-confidence is shaken. The self-confidence of an empath is based in/on the belief system that, if he/she does only good things, he/she is a good person and therefore valuable. If he/she does any thing which is not so “good”, the self-esteem is shaken. That are totally different belief systems, which inevitably have to collide. It is only my opinion, but I would like to discuss it .

  6. complicity is a great way to get corrupted. it’s better to face the concrete than become a pawn.

    power-hungry predators use the alienating effects of power that pre-exist to take advantage of people (like loneliness, insecurity, sexual repression, material struggles, etc..), and people themselves support those systems of power too, out of naivety and it’s a basic, primal fear to not be a part of the collective. complicity *is* ostrich politics. in patriarchal societies, that’s how most women behave.

    if you look at the cult of R Kelly, women help him groom his victims and pick up after him.

    on the social media i use, there was a married guy who was accused of rape by many young women. he had a lot of female fans, mostly bored suburban housewives that he felt contempt for.

    my mother not only ignored our Dad was abusing us, but even felt maliciously jealous towards me and sent me to boarding school while punishing me with cold treatment.

    women throw other women under the bus. that’s why people like HG can be a sex object despite their knowing. it’s all really gross. why anyone believes this is not about fuel for HG, you’d have to be really stupid not to see it. he asks for money and calls it ‘work’ for selling what is basically psycho fanfic. i heard the live stream and knew it was a sexual performance right away.

    it is afterall, boring and pathetic to be a fb stalker. this adds some glamour.

  7. I have to keep mentally repeating the mantra “you have to be the adult here” because I truly am the only adult in this situation. Even if the mid-range 10 year old in a grown-man’s body thinks he is “capable of doing right by me” he’s really not.

    1. Mid-rangers are hopeless – cut your losses – I speak from personal and professional experience LOL

  8. It’s so unfair and sad that we’re the only ones who truly knows you. What’s even worse, very often we support your fake performance by hiding the truth from our friends and family because we’re too scared that your behaviour is a response to our fault.

    1. Correct Nat and this is a powerful way of controlling you. It is like being caught in your own personal nightmare. You can see how we behave, but why cannot everybody else? You are screaming yet nobody is noticing save us and we are just grinning at you.

      1. This explains my mother and mother in law both know i know what they are and so theres a lot of sneakiness and passive aggressiveness. Lots of controlling but in a way if i mention it publicly ill look crazy or unreasonable. “The grin” ive seen from my mother in law after she gets her way on something. Ive had to take a step back and remind myself i am reasonable and not pit heads with her just to make sure she doesnt get her way. Thats counterproductive and thats how these types make us crazy. I pick my battles and if its not an issue i let her think she won and keep the peace. My kids are first priority and i dont want to cause stress or let them see the tensions. Its a struggle but at least i understand the insanity of it.

  9. Yes indeed. This applies to me.

    People are not trustworthy or loyal and don’t deserve to know my hidden truth.

    1. Sniglet…i think we all have things we hide. I know bc of the narcs in my life i am not who i was say 15 yrs ago. I am not as open about myself and hide very vulnerable parts of myself. Being too open is not good either imo. I am more open if im in a support type situation helping someone going thru similiar issues but i am definitely more cautious. Theres some good in protecting private matters about oneself. With narcissists its the extreme and they put another person/s in front of the real person. I guess they feel they have to.

  10. The ones that do see what you hide you toy with and are greatly insecure of and dont trust.

  11. Yes. Truth. Parts that you hide will be revealed to no one…not even the few to whom you reveal bits and pieces. Not even your readership…in a place where you can be honest. Crucify me for saying that.

    1. 1jaded1
      I agree with you about not revealing all, but is there ever a time/place/person where it is safe for anyone to reveal all? Maybe it’s just me, but there are things about myself I would never reveal to anyone.

      And it’s not just a matter of trust. Information is like a weapon that once you let it out of your hands can come back and hurt you in ways you never might have imagined – at least that I wouldn’t have imagined! Trust is good, but needs to be used with prudence. Is that just me being paranoid or dont most people keep things hidden?

      1. Windstorm, I think, it is quite normal to hide some things. I believe there is no one in the world who does not hide something, which is painful or shameful for this person. And that is no exaggeration. It is normal. Sometimes we do not agree with the things we have done in past because they do not fit to the image we have of ourselves, sometimes it is an information that could be abused (average people are much more cautious ) and sometimes it is shameful only for us, but not for others. For example, when I was young, I should read a poem in church, and I forgot my paper and what did I blare into the microphone very loud ? “Holy shit” The whole church laughed about (at) me. For them it was a big fun, nothing shameful, only a funny mistake, but for me it was as if the world would break down. Nowadays I can tell that story and have to laugh about it too, but as a child…..?

      2. Mona
        Thank you for your answer. I found it intriguing that you feel normals are more hesitant to share information. I’d never thought of it that way, but you are probably correct.

        Embarrassing things from childhood do haunt us. And it can affect you for years. I’m sorry you had to deal with that.
        Your story reminded me of something from my adulthood. I had taken my 3 yr old, 2 yr old and baby to church and sat near the front like I prefer. My 3 yr old kept making noises so I gathered them all up to take them outside. All the way down the aisle to the doors he screamed,
        “No, mommy, no!!! Don’t beat me!!! I’ll be good!!!”
        Most of the church began to laugh and the priest made a joke, but I was completely mortified! Makes a funny story now, though.

      3. Hi Windstorm2. I understand. I said my comment not to poke a hornet nest. I have revealed my entire self to people, not just the same person. My best friend knows 99.9% about me. I am fortunate she hasn’t used it against me.

        There are some aspects that I have revealed. It is up to the person whether or not if they will use them against me. In some of these cases I had no choice. I just had to pee in the wind and hope I didn’t swallow any…ick.

        Normally, I am “Silent (insert name that begins with S here)”. I much prefer listening to others. I joke to HG that I have revealed more of myself here than anywhere. I find that frightening.

        I guess my point is that I admire HG’s willingness to reveal and am pointing out that it is selective, and purely his choice what he reveals. I hope he knows this is a safe place. Maybe I am just naive.

        HG. Please feel free to fill in the blanks that I am missing. I’m sure there are many.

      4. 1jaded1
        I’m glad you are able to be so open. I wish I were as well. It seems like it would be wonderful to have someone I could be completely open and honest with. Maybe that would be one of those “soulmates” the narcs talk about. But then, narcs use those secret things you share against you when you least expect it – often twisted and distorted into something much worse. Growing up surrounded by narcs I learned early to hide away anything that could be used against me. I’m glad that hasn’t happened to you. Maybe you’re not as jaded as your name sounds? 😉

        Sitting here at 4 in the morning reading comments, my mind has run away with me. Twilight made one about seeds planted in children and HG posted another Little ACON –
        Sometimes I feel like a wild blackberry patch. Full of sweet, valuable fruit, but covered in thorns, surrounded by green briars, thistles and sticker bushes and growing on the side of a steep, rocky hillside. I’m sitting here wondering how much of all those defenses i created, how much was environmental and how much was planted by my narcs?

        There’s probably no way to ever know. All I can do is see myself and my environment for what it is and be a good, mindful empath. Think I’ll go downstairs and let the dogs out.

      5. Windstorm2. I am Jaded. I’m the one who sits at a table and listens to what others say and I don’t volunteer info. I keep myself compartmentalized. My best friend knows 99.9 percent about me hut not 100%. Others know about me bc it was literally life and death. I hope it doesn’t sound like a drama queen, but I asked a friendish if something on my body looked normal as I was trying not to pass out. She had me taken to A&E. I was angry furious. An onlooker insinuated self on me bc she gossips. I was mortified. I wished her gone..she is.

        I maybe don’t understand the context of the post and that is on me.

  12. Oh my! Here’s another one of your “perfect” imagery HG that speaks 10,000 words! Excellent! Everyone of us; on both sides, have a story to tell about our; in many cases, damaged childhood emotional trauma which may be the bitter root in who we are today.

    This damaged and dysfunctional emotion may live-on inside us until; in retrospect, emotional repair and/or understanding and/or forgiveness has been satisfied.

    It is my opinion and may I suggest that we might research and understand BOTH sides of these dysfunctional relationships; especially if the relational process is repeated over and over. Clearly understanding both the victim and the perpetrator to identify and sustain an effective long-term recovery.

    After an effective recovery, STAY within a brilliant community such as this to guard against a potential relapse of dysfunctional relationships. Stay the course of identified emotional repair.

    Thank you again HG and this great community of researchers, discoverers, survivors and recovering souls! You amazingly support, encourage and sustain me with your enlightened kindness!

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