The Narcissistic Truths – No. 192
20 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Truths – No. 192”
Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)
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Hmm… Depends on who is a drinker of those tears.
The Empath’s tears looks like a weakness, but no… they empower him/her in a long run. The tears clean his/her system and give a freedom.
The Narcissist, initiating and watching them, is illusionary empowered by them for a short period, but they invariably destroy him/her in a long run. Empath’s tears kill the the Narc’s self-respect.
This amazing. I️ got rage and fury then silence for tears over him. He HATED it. He told me that he got in serious “trouble” with his wife for yelling at his grandkids in the car for crying.
HG, if the tears are for him and fuel for him then why is it so enraging?
See the answer given above to another reader 12345.
I was always desperately holding back my tears caused by his behaviour. I thought showing my weakness would only make it worse as weakness brings contempt.
This was one area of narcissism that baffled me before i knew much about narcissism. I remember getting upset with my narc and hed seem to enjoy it which i could not understand. If i retaliated by being snarky or throwing a backhanded insult he would get this laugh that is so creepy. Its like an evil laugh. It would infuriate me even more until id get mean and then hed finally shut up and go quiet. Then he would pretend it didnt get to him but i knew hed try to get even passive aggressively. I can in a twisted way understand this mentality bc when hed go quiet it felt good to know it offended him like he had offended me.
Of course afterwards id feel tremendous guilt at how i was and hed act sweet again. Why antagonize someone in the first place?
As far as crying ive never once let him see me cry. Ive told him how hurt ive been but hes never had that luxury of seeing my tears nor will he ever. I dont cry in front of people in general except my hubby.
Ive shed many tears over the narc and my tears now are tears for myself. When i cry i cry at how ive been treated by him not about losing him or afraid to lose him. My tears are for me.
HG, are our tears only powerful (fuel)
when they are result of the narcissist behaviour?
Crying for the loss of a pet or friend
or any other reason unrelated to the narcissist surely would only annoy them?
Plus do not narcissists only cry for themselves,
feel sorry and enact pity plays to reap our emotions?
If we cause your tears it is fuel.
If you are crying over something else it is wasted fuel and thus irritating and annoying.
If a narcissist cries, it is for him or herself.
Thank you HG.
It’s the same thing as throwing up around a narcissist. They will despise you for it. Especially when you can’t help it.
Of course you can, it is always your fault.
This completely rings true. Thanks for the clarification.
My narc couldn’t stand my tears. Sometimes he just gave me that utterly blank stare, devoid of all empathy. But most times he turned his back to me or just left, commencing a prolonged silent treatment. Fuel, fuel, fuel.
I like this image. Find it clever.
Dear Mr Tudor,
One simply does not cry in front of a narcissist. They don’t care. Never show your vulnerability, they’ll use it against you.
They only produce “crocodile” tears, probably from onions!
thanks again
agree^
Tears… interesting. Just watched the flash tonight and the “weeper” was in the show….
ANOTHER flashback. when he (i made myself fall) flung me against the closed door going into our apartment from the hall way. i fell and sobbed. he said i will give you something to cry about. ikr. i walked in the rain sobbing and sobbing. could not believe it. same day he finalized his divorce mediation. poetic justice. one year ago +13 days from this moment. time warp. love the soft hearted bad ass i am becoming. sansnarc.
He always yelled at me for crying… so I learned not to. Then it came easy because I didn’t care.
I would like to understand this as well… my ex told me not to cry-that it was a sign of weakness. Not sure if that was because what he may have been told in the past between his Mother and the military or if it was some kind of power control over me. Sometimes he would wipe my eyes and pretend to care, but other times he would tell me to stop. Very confusing. I suppose therein lies the fuel.
To you as fuel? I can’t see the advantage to me except as a pressure relief valve in private