The Mockery of Mimicry

THE MOCKERY OF MIMICRY-2

I love to copy. I have to copy. It is all I have known for as long as I can remember. It is my natural setting to mimic those around me. I have to fit in, I have to belong and the most effective way for me to achieve this is to replicate everything that I come into contact with. If I interact with an esteemed academic I will listen to his or her achievements and then pass those off as my own as I peel away their glittering accolades and apply them to myself. Should I spend time with an exceptional sporting individual then their record-breaking endeavours will be purloined for my benefit and sported as my own in furtherance of my own belief in my exceptional ability. Author? Yes I have written books too. Model? Yes I do some modelling from time to time. Chef? You should try my signature dish, it is heavenly. Everyone I have dealings with presents me with an opportunity to copy an element of their personality. character or personae so that I may then present it as my own and in so doing I shine brighter and become an even more attractive prospect to those whose lives I effortlessly infiltrate.

This skill at mimicry enables me to ghost in and out of people’s lives. I know the social norms which are applicable and through careful examination and application I am able to pass as one just like you. I am a facsimile of a decent, personable and engaging individual and this allows me access to my targets without raising any alarms. My veneer of respectability has been fashioned from all those that I engage with, gathering patches, fragments, shards and pieces until they are hewn together and I drape it about me allowing me to come and go as I please.

It is however with you that I exhibit the astonishing mimicry of which I am a master. Once I have selected you as my target I have learned much about you already. With what will eventually be recognised as alarming ease, I replicate a fondness for all those things which you like and a distaste for all those things that you dislike. Think back and you will readily recall how I love horse-riding just as you did, that I enjoyed swimming in open water just like you and my passion for the works of Geoffrey Chaucer matched yours. Those interests which were close to you became interests that were close to me. Your appreciation of an excellent bottle of Chateau Margaux was matched by my ability to remember the applicable tasting notes and recite them to you as if it was my own appreciation. I would mimic the way you sat, copying your body language because I know, from extensive practice that this paves the way to bonding with you. I would mimic your speech patterns to form a sub-conscious link between us. I liked blue because you liked blue. I found listening to soul music an offence to my ears but I maintained a false enjoyment of it since you liked it so much. I actually enjoy choosing from the Crustacea bar but your dislike of seafood meant that I too turned lobster and oysters away. How often did you remark aloud, to me or to your friends,

“We have so much in common.”

“We like so many of the same things it is wonderful.”

“We share so many interests, I love it.”

“We are so well matched. On every level. We really are soulmates.”

Of course we are. I made it so because I wanted to be everything you wanted. I took your  long list of likes and dislikes, your catalogue of loves and hates and your grimoire of hopes and fears and I copied each and every page. I am a walking photocopier and I copied everything you wanted in order to ensure that my seduction of you was successful, encompassing and absolute.

Yet, my astonishing powers of mimicry did not end there. Goodness me no, there was more yet to come. In a particularly unpleasant twist to this malevolent skill of mine I would mimic your responses to my devaluation of you but this time it would not be a complete facsimile, I would make a slight change to my copying so that you would be undermined even further.

When you stood there crying with frustration and I drank deep of the delicious fuel you provided me, I would raise my hands to my eyes and draw pretend tears on my cheeks and make a sobbing noise to humiliate you further. Here I was letting you know that I copied everything that went before yet now I copy again but not with the perfection I once exhibited. I allow the sting of sarcasm and the malicious mockery to infiltrate my copying of your behaviour so that your hurt and bewilderment was increased. You would shout at me and I would shout back using the exact words before standing and laughing at you as you burned with frustration, unable to find any response. You might stamp your feet in exasperation and I would do the same but with a leer of disdain writ large across my face.

There were times when you would scream. A terrified scream as my vicious manipulations would take their toll and as you tried to curl into a ball and hope you might just disappear and escape this nightmare, I would lean in close to you and mimic your scream into your ear, creating this fabricated falsetto of distress in order to further your own. Every reaction to my devaluation of you had the potential to be met by a mimicked reply from me in order to further your misery and demonstrate I did not treat your responses with any sincerity or concern.

I am the master of mimicry, the king of copying and the duke of duplication. I am a walking and talking photocopier machine. I put the rank in Rank Xerox.

55 thoughts on “The Mockery of Mimicry

  1. Chihuahuamum says:

    Anyone from phoenix arizona here? Im visiting for the next 3 weeks and loving it so far!! Any local attractions to see feel free to let me know…
    The narc has mimicked a lot thru the yrs. One thing ive noticed is he never mimicked liking similiar things and was honest about his interests and hobbies which coaligned with mine but he did mimic in agreement to values i held and feelings i felt about certain personal and nonpersonal issues. I remember being upset about something and pointing out that we were different in a way like i was for the first time seeing this and he said ..i guess we are. He said it in a way that sounded like he was well aware of that. It surprised me bc he made it seem we were so alike in the beginning.

    1. Anm says:

      Chihuahuamum,
      I live an hour and half away from phoenix. I used to live there, and still commute often to the area. what side of town are you staying at, and what are you into? If you are staying at the East Valley Area ( Scottsdale, Mesa, Tempe), the choices are endless. You can hike Camelback mountain, there are a lot of great restaurants and night life, and spas. Sedona is about 2 hours north of phoenix, and worth checking out.

      1. NarcAngel says:

        Ahhhh!
        CamelBACK mountain. I took a discount tour and hiked CamelTOE trail in my lululemons. I experienced a nasty crevasse and it took me awhile to dig out. Once I successfully navigated the mound, I was disappointed to find most of the photos were overexposed.

        1. MB says:

          You’re a riot NA 😂

        2. WiserNow says:

          hahaha NarcAngel, you crack me up! I had to google what lululemons were lol 😂 …for anyone who doesn’t know, they are yoga clothes and running gear. Cameltoe trail… so funny! 😂

      2. Chihuahuamum says:

        Hi anm and bibi…im in the scottsdale area. Ill definitely check out sedona and camelback mountain thx! 🙂

      3. Chihuahuamum says:

        Wisernow….crack me up? 🤣😂

        1. WiserNow says:

          Chihuahuamum,
          You may already know what that means, but just in case you don’t, it means to laugh out loud or uncontrollably when someone says something funny 😂

    2. Bibi says:

      Sedona is a must see. I loved it there. Arizona is beautiful, as is New Mexico.

  2. Sam Silver says:

    Is devaluation the only way to meet your needs for fuel, H.G., or are there alternative pathways that you could use? Much of behavior is cosmetic. For instance, the kiddo who hits people because she wants space is not all that different from the kiddo who asks politely for space. They both have the same need, but the child who hits is perceived as a villain while the child who requests is thought of as an angel. You have said in the past that you would like to be married again. Devaluation would tax your future wife.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      It would but the aim is not to get to that point. Whether that happens remains to be seen. Fuel comes from both positive and negative and from a variety of sources. The issues is that for most narcissist the primary source is a massive part of their fuel matrix (a more significant percentage than that of the Greater) and therefore because the primary source becomes painted black (as that always occurs for reasons previously explained (my unique new dynamic may avoid that – we shall see) thus the narcissist still needs fuel, the primary source is still the main provider (he or she cannot be jettisoned because this would cause a fuel crisis) so the negative fuel has to be obtained.

      1. Sam Silver says:

        I’d expect any effective solution you come up with to be quite lucrative for you, among other things. There are zero effective clinically proven treatments for Narcissistic Personality Disorder at the moment.

      2. foolme1time says:

        HG, you will avoid it! If anyone can you can! You deserve happiness as much as anyone else does on here! Ok! I know what you will say after this next remark, I’m going to say it anyhow! I believe you! I believe if you want something bad enough you can and will make it happen! I wish you a lifetime living in the golden period!! Even normal ( what ever that is) couples do not do that!😉

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Thank you.

  3. kel says:

    Bruce Springsteen said about successful people: “You take a person who’s been told they’re as worthless as dirt, and then someone else has told them they’re the second baby Jesus, and that’s the mix that fuels the fire.”

    That sounds like the dynamic of a narcissist’s drive. But, encouragingly, empaths have certainly been told we’re worthless, but we are capable of realizing for ourselves that we’re terrific (without going overboard). It’s amazing how easy it all is to see when you get out from under the clouds of darkness of narcissists.

  4. Mona says:

    From your point of view a huge victory about the inner void and the lack of being an individual.

    From a normal point of view – the showdown of a completely destroyed human being with no individuality at all.

    From a too empathic standpoint – someone who needs help.

  5. Nika says:

    Ha haha… amusing.

  6. Bibi says:

    HG, you got me listening to DM again. Now I watch their vids on YT! I swear I am thrown back into high school. I used to cry over this song. It is so cheesy! Not one of their best lyrically but I do hold a special place for it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OkIvGWPUUwk

    1. HG Tudor says:

      With the twist in the tail however.

      1. Lou says:

        Sounds like the beast rearing its ugly head. Scary.

    2. MB says:

      I like it too Bibi! I had never heard it before. So no crying in high school. It did remind me of HG and Shieldmaiden but I didn’t cry for them. I enjoyed the punk rocker chicken ‘do Gore was sporting. (See link) Don’t know if you saw in another thread so I repeat myself here.

      https://goo.gl/images/dHjAvR

      1. Bibi says:

        MB:

        Love that pic! Dave is the hot one in my opinion, not this floof-haired dude. Thinking of HG and SM? No.

        HG I have a confession. I did look at your IG but I can’t follow it b/c IG depresses me. It seems like every narc uses that to show off, and while your pics were very appetizing and pretty it is clearly my emotional thinking taking over, wherein I had feelings of smallness and dullness overwhelm me, in that I felt small and dull. Logically, this doesn’t make sense.

        They were nice though. I liked the guitar pic.

        My emotional thinking alwyas focuses on what is missing in my life and what I lack, rather than my good qualities, but then I did a 45 min kickboxing session and I feel a lot better now.

        ‘Somebody’ is a touching song–it reaches me emotionally, but not so much intellectually, as opposed to some of their other songs that can do both.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Well done on recognising its impact and seeing the need to withdraw. I agree, IG is a paradise for narcissists and narcissistic individuals but it is a ‘hot platform’ for the provision of information. I am looking to cultivate more presence there in order to reach a different section of those who need information compared to other conduits. I use IG to give people a few glimpses into my daily world (naturally without compromising my identity) and also so people have some fun trying to work things out and gathering clues about me as they learn.

        2. foolme1time says:

          Bono, I feel the same with IG! My emotions take over. Even the smallness and dullness part! I also go for the what’s missing and have been desperately trying to work on that! As for the kick boxing, I bought myself a heavy weight bag for Xmas! Years of martial arts and kickboxing get into your blood and it is an awesome way to work through anxiety and stress! I’m just sorry it took me so long to see the similarities between you and myself! Have a good night Bibi😘

        3. MB says:

          Same Bibi! I’m glad I’m not the only one that feels small and dull. The rise of social media has bound to have had a staggering impact on mental health and emotional well-being across the globe. Unfortunately, we do it to ourselves.

          “Comparison is the thief of joy.”
          ~ Theodore Roosevelt

          Yet…

          “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
          ~Eleanor Roosevelt

      2. Bibi says:

        I hope IG can being you more audience. I am horrible at self-promotion for these very reasons I disclosed.

        I have something funny to share, however. On my public FB page I occasionally get random men soliciting me for various ‘activities’ and yesterday I got some strange guy in Germany telling me loved me and that he wanted to massage my feet.

        Not exactly red wine and Japanese food.

        This is not my 1st German man solicitation. It was even in German and I could make out most of it, save for the ‘massage’ part.

        ‘Wait, did I read that correctly?’

        I get a lot suitors from Pakistan too. I am lucky like that.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Ah yes, I should have made myself known, I wanted to practise my German you see.

      3. Bibi says:

        Haha, HG. I can recite some Rilke in German.

        Pardon my typos in my post. Ugh! It would be good if I could get my own language 1st before moving onto another. LOL I think the sun was in my eyes.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          That’s the golden period for you, blinds you to everything.

          1. windstorm says:

            I wanted to check out your IG account, HG, since so many made mention of it. So I opened an IG account for one of my dogs. Didn’t put any pictures, no background, no contacts, only followed you and Natl Geographic – just a totally blank account. I noticed today the account has two followers. Why would anyone follow a blank IG account with no info on it? That seems insane.
            Is it possible to block people from following it?

            And can anyone tell me how to stop IG from keeping recommending other accounts for me to follow? I swear I deleted some of the same recommendations at least 4 times today! They’re back up there day after day. Can I shut off all recommendations? I enjoy your pictures, HG, but it may just be too much trouble.

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Probably bots. Yes you can block them. I don’t know about the recommendations issue.

          3. windstorm says:

            Thanks, HG. I’ll try googling it. I can’t find anything in my settings for that, but maybe that’s because I’m using a phone. Maybe you have more options if you’re using a computer.

          4. WiserNow says:

            windstorm,
            There is a way you can have a look at HG’s IG account without actually having your own IG account. That’s how I do it. I don’t have an IG account because I don’t need one and wouldn’t use it even if I did.

            It may be the cheat’s way of doing it, but I just google “HG Tudor instagram” and then his instagram account comes up as the first result of the search. I click on that and then it goes straight to his instagram account and I can check out all of his photos and posts etc.

            It cuts out a lot of mucking around with an instagram account (and getting bot followers and unwanted recommendations) if you don’t want one. I think you can only use this ‘google search’ method if you’re using a computer and not a phone though. I haven’t thoroughly tested it with a phone.

          5. foolme1time says:

            Wind Storm I made my account private. I also have only used it to follow HG. That way you don’t have to worry about anyone following you as they have to ask first.

          6. windstorm says:

            Foolmeonetime
            Did you use a computer or a cell phone? I can’t find a way to do it with the iPhone app.

          7. foolme1time says:

            I used my iPhone. Let me go in and see how I did it! Lol

          8. foolme1time says:

            WS , go to the bottom of your page and click on the figure of the person. Up at the top of the page click on the three bars. That should make that page slide over. At the very bottom of the page click on settings. Scroll down to account privacy. Click on the arrow to the right. You should see account private. Click that deal and it should turn blue. Your set. Your account is private. Let me know if you have any trouble. 😘

          9. windstorm says:

            Foolmeonetime
            Oooh! That worked! Thank you so much!!

          10. foolme1time says:

            Your welcome special lady!! 😘😘

          11. foolme1time says:

            Whenever you need to hide, I’m your go to person!! 🥰

          12. windstorm says:

            Foolmeonetime
            Ha, ha! Hiding is my way of life. Glad to have you as a resource!

          13. MB says:

            Just ignore everything but HG and you’re good Windstorm.

          14. windstorm says:

            MB
            Ha, ha! Easier said than done! All those recommendations annoy the crap out of me! I think it’s that IG itself is intruding on my privacy. But FB is the same way. The last time I tried having a fake FB account, it wouldn’t leave me alone! Despite never having my location on and telling it I lived in Quebec, FB kept trying to locate where I was by the server my cell phone signal was going thru and then promoting events/services in that area. I found that both disturbing and obnoxious.

          15. WhoCares says:

            Windstorm,

            You can make your IG profile private and then people must send a request to follow you and see your content.

          16. windstorm says:

            WhoCares
            How do you make it private? It’s always going to be an empty account, I don’t want anyone following it.

          17. WhoCares says:

            Shoot Windstorm – I had to go check; thought it was under edit profile but no. There is a ‘settings’ icon at top left (when you are on your IG main page) when you select the icon there is a list of functions including ‘privacy and security’. Selecting that brings you to the option to make a private account.

            Well, I’m glad I had to search that for you. I only had a public one (for work) but had seen people with private accounts.

          18. windstorm says:

            Thanks, WhoCares!

          19. WhoCares says:

            You’re welcome Windstorm.
            Sorry it didn’t work for you though.

          20. windstorm says:

            WhoCares
            That’s ok. You’ve still helped me. I can google it like you said on my phone. If I get too fed up with IG, I’ll delete the app and just do that. I’m enjoying the beautiful pics from Natl Geo and Earth Pics now too though. It’s nice to open the app and be surprised with breathtaking pics. Sort of like a little kid finding Easter eggs. 😄

          21. windstorm says:

            WhoCares
            Ha, ha. Not in my IG homepage. Top left is just a camera icon. When I click on it, it wants access to my photos. I bet you have to be on an actual computer, not an iPhone. I may drag out my old lap top and take it to KS next month, where my daughter has WiFi and try it there. That’ll be a pill, though. Haven’t turned it on for over a year. Probably’ll need 38,000 updates. 🙄

          22. WhoCares says:

            Windstorm,

            I’m on an Android device, not a computer.
            That sounds troublesome.
            Could you not just download the IG app? (Although I wasn’t using the app myself when I gave you those instructions.) Or you could go to your local library and use a computer there to sign in and fix things?

          23. windstorm says:

            WhoCares
            I did download the app on my phone. Paranoid is my middle name. I’d never trust a public computer with anything. I won’t even use public WiFi.

            If IG annoys me too much, I’ll just delete it and google HG periodically like you suggested. 😊

      4. Bibi says:

        Indeed, thus why my square is forever golden. Hmm. I might actually like my color now.

      5. Bibi says:

        Foolmetime:

        I’ve been doing some online fitness program that incorporates strength training and muscle building, along with some cardio, like kickboxing. It has been great so far and last night I was zonked out before 9pm.

        It’s not just IG but I have noticed some You Tube pettiness as of late. Now, granted there is a lot of great stuff on YT but I have come to learn that channels will do retaliation videos on one another.

        ‘So and so said this about me and I just want to say she is full of shit…’ Blah blah blah.

        Also, there is something called ‘Mukbangs’ where you eat while recording yourself live, and it’s not like a cooking introduction/recipe thing, but rather people will sit there slurping their noodles and gossiping about other channels while followers comment and add to the gossip. There is no structure to it.

        It’s like People Magazine overload and my brain just hurts. With YT, I don’t need to subscribe to what I don’t like but I also don’t like endless photos being shoved in my face–most notably endless pics of people. Just people, people, people. My God, is there anything more boring than people?

        Look at my yoga ass in my yoga pose. No, get the fuck outta here.

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