Is He A Narcissist?
Is he or she a narcissist?
The information says yes, so why do you keep doubting it and how can you conquer this?
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59 thoughts on “Is He A Narcissist?”
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Hg, on the flip side to our emotional thinking persuading us to reject such a notion that the one we are with could not be an narcissist, I find I can be quick to label all with the guilty brush when indeed they are not.
I think that comes about when we are too consumed with the whole narcissist dynamic. When we shape our dealings with someone with this in the forefront of our mind. Understandable, but not healthy. Guilty until proven innocent! 😆
Dam. You really DO sounds like Hugh Grant… I’ve listened to your stuff before but now that you’ve mentioned that I can’t get it out of my head 🤣
HG is Hugh Grant, who is descended from the Tudors. A little computer deepening of his voice doesn’t change it one iota. It’s obvious. Now whether he’s just doing a gig (doubtful, since the world has watched Hugh Grant be outrageously narcissistic in his life), or he’s just generating passive income for his old age is anyone’s guess. But he does know what he’s talking about….front row center. Like him or not I don’t think he cares.
HG
This was a great listen. Especially entertaining: Your delivery of “Because it’s a lion” . Great point that we will look to that one thing they don’t do to exclude them from being a narcissist lest we offend. God forbid. We should just remain, and eat the other 16 things they do that drive us nuts rather than get it wrong on that one. Why? Because we are empaths.
Thank you NA.
I am watching Diana: In Her Own Words. And wow. She describes the empath/narc relationship so well (without us using those terms). Great documentary! I had no idea how much she suffered.
HG is Camilla a narc as well?
She describes her wedding as the worst day of her life.
Just goes to prove people never want to think critically about what they are actually seeing. All of England was so thrilled about this wedding… that was the worst day of her life.
I have not analysed her, Empath007.
Ok thank you.
Diana wasn’t a narc? If not, I am surprised.
I was too. Too be honest I grew up thinking that Charles was swayed by the royal family to marry her due to the fact she was more attractive then Camilla. That she was the “better” choice. That he was in love with Camilla but went through with anyway.
I read on this site it was Charles who was the narc and was a little skeptical. Thinking thAt since lots in here are from the UK they did not see it as a smart move to call a beloved deceased princess a narc… as it be a deathly unpopular opinion that would make people upset.
Turns out. At leAst from what I can tell of the documentary… that Charles is definitely a narc. When asked in an interview “are you two in love “ his answer was (literally) “whatever in love means” he couldn’t even give a “oh very!” For the cameras !
Diana suffered a lot from triangulation and lack of support etc. He was also extremely jealous of her popularity. As it exceeded his own. Especially after the affair came out.
She was quite dramatic though (speaking of crying a lot And then throwing her self down the stairs 😳)
Anyways… you should watch it ! It was good.
I haven’t seen it but crying a lot, the bulimia, depression, self-harm etc. are typical symptoms of trauma caused by emotional and psychological abuse.
This is a mandatory listen. The frustration of ET preventing me from “fully diagnosing” him due to one characteristic had me spinning in circles. The narc did not mirror my likes and interests. In fact, he RARELY asked a single question about me at all. We had a few interests in common but nothing personal enough that would make THIS a red flag. Everything else was there, every other box ticked, but the fact that I was not mirrored in this way would keep me coming back around to “maybe he’s NOT a narc.” Especially since this is such a hallmark narc trait.
Hi HG,
I’ve gone low contact with him and I’ve stopped posting on my Instagram to focus on myself. My Facebook is private and now he’s created fake profiles, one of the accounts he tricked me and cloned my good friend’s Mom’s account! He was asking me how are you, how is everyone around you, and what are you doing now? Obvious! I answered his questions…was this a hoover even though I thought it was someone else??? And why not just email me or text me those questions directly?
Thank you, I’ve missed your videos. But you’ve helped me tremendously!
1. Yes, it is a hoover.
2. Because it he asked direct there is a risk you would ignore him because you know it is him and thus he would be wounded.
🦁
Cecil!
😭😭😭
Thank you for your brilliant work HG. You are a saviour to millions. That video was amazing and kept getting better and better.
I’m always confused as you know. One reason is I compare the Narcs to each other. I’ve never been with a man who was empathic or normal. Only Psychopaths or full blown Narcissists.
They make each other look good. The UMR and MMR for example help me lots and it confuses me, because the Psychopath and psychopath LMR refused to help me.
The MMR and UMR operate a facade and it tricks me.
You are welcome Whitney and thank you for your kind comments.
Thank you you HG. I engaged with him and I think he’s an empath again
I suggest you arrange a consultation to address this breach of no contact.
He is an empath
He is not.
He’s aware of everyone’s feelings and he’s a good listener. He and I seem the same
I listen to people in consultations. I am a narcissistic psychopath.
He said he finds it hard to lie, and he only lies if it means not hurting someone 😢
He said he’s not very smart, he’s average intelligence.
He came to my shop yesterday.
-He got drill bits and hung curtain rods.
-He took me to lunch and paid
– He drove me to shops to look at laptops and spoke to the sales people. He likes to talk to people with me. He likes it when people ask me questions and pay attention to me in social settings. I don’t know why.
– He said he’s gonna re-lay the flooring my friend layed.
– He said he’s gonna take photos of my products with his camera at customers houses
– He measured his dad’s van because his dad wants to deliver my products
We didn’t do anything physical just hug
I won’t make a claim one way or another for you Whitney I am not the expert.
I can only go off of my own experiences… but mine was a great listener as well, the reason was he was concerend with gathering information he could use.
He would also say he was against lying, and that people have the choice to tell the truth. Etc.
In the beginning of any relationship (including with normals or empaths) we never really know them. Everything is great. It can be difficult to see past the butterflies.
I think if HG is urging you to consider he’s a narc you may want to take it seriously. And/or do a consult with him.
@whitney he is not going to tell you it’s easy to lie or be unhelpful.
Also just woman go woman… if he’s a brand
New boyfriends I’d keep his hands out of my business. Your products do not need to be delivered by him. Always protect your Assets. Don’t get him Involved.
That’s just my two cents.
Sorry *to women….
His plan is to make a construction company. Now I keep talking about his “construction company” like it already exists. His construction company will be all encompassing and he’s gonna hire all kinds of people, like his friend who has a (real) carpentry business.
I asked if my (real) business could please work at his construction company? He said yes, they should be able to find a place for me on the team 😂
Well. Keep your real
Business and him
Seperate. Lol. That’s too much too soon if he’s offering all that help regarding what’s yours.
It’s also a good test to see how he reacts when you politely decline help.
Not to mention it’s delusions of grandeur that most likely won’t come to fruition. Been there heard it.
HG. You are always right. I’ve been engaging with him and I’m “white” but he is 100% a narcissist. I went clothes shopping with him. I’ve never seen anything like it. His posing and facial expressions in front of the mirror. He is very disordered.
I talk to the UMR Elite again also. I ignore him for days and he becomes neurotic and apologises for the last thing he said.
Why can’t I interact with the UMR who is always nice and helps me, listens to any problem, compliments me, pays for things, takes me and friends on his boats and acts empathic towards me for years. And the MMR who acts nice and does many practical things to help me. Why can’t I interact until they silent treat me for a few weeks before they are nice again. I enjoy narcissists. They go above and beyond and have lots of ambitions in life. I like lots of things about narcissists.
Simply put, because they are narcissists. You need to consult further with me so I can assist you with the emotional thinking which is presenting itself.
Thank you HG. I like it when you say I have Emotional Thinking.
You ought not to.
This information saves lives. Thank you HG.
Yes it does. Thank you and ensure you spread this information far and wide.
I’ve tickled the Lions belly many times. My emotional thinking didn’t convince me he wasn’t a narcissist, it convinced me that I could handle it.
Indeed Mercy and it will move in whatever way is the most effective and easiest at keeping you feeding that addiction.
Hg, I think I am going to order an N detector test.
This is my first time commenting as I prefer to watch from the sidelines. However, before I jump into anything monetary wise, I just wanted to run something by you.
My spouse (maybe soon to be EX spouse) is in cyber security and IT. I believe he may have gained access to my devices. Given his MRN status (my diagnosis) do you think it is unwise of me not doing anything about it? There is no hard evidence, I could be paranoid. On the other hand, if I am correct, he might use this to his advantage. I do not have anything on my device other than your blog site, sms function, and Google.
Hello JessF and welcome to the comments.
1. Organise a Narc Detector Consultation to gain a determination on the evidence.
2. Based on that classification, if the individual is a narcissist (as you suspect) consult with me with regard to the cyber issues as I will be able to confirm or allay your concerns, and where the concerns are confirmed I can assist you with what you should do about it. At this stage I cannot comment on your suspicions as I need the evidence (which is provided through consultation) and it would be unhelpful to speculate without it. If he is a narcissist, such concerns are understandable however dependent on his school, it may be the effect of emotional thinking. I look forward to assisting you.
I’m glad to see this addressed and glad HG that you have the skills to check this out as I have come across it too. My n had set up my computers on his business IP. Finally I just didn’t care but with my final escape I was scared to death, not only from CPTSD effects but he had made a point of dropping my belongings inside my house and keeping the house key. Of course I changed the locks but coupled with my heightened anxiety and his escalating hoovers I was paranoid. I also have a friend who has a narc husband and he puts on a good front for me and others but as soon as he is alone with her the mask drops and he is horrid. I have directed her to the site and he keeps track of her phone, everything she researched, her texts, completely isolated her. Her only escape is work and if she is at my place which he hates because I coach her. The most dangerous time is when someone leaves their abuser, especially a lesser. Maybe a good assistance package would be how to GOSO in these situations. Maybe there is one but I was 8 months gone when I found you and mine already couldn’t find me without a whole lot of effort, not worth it at that point.
There already is a GOSO Consultation.
I will have to get her a consult on my phone and steal her…
Mine hacked my FB account 4 times, Twitter twice, my messanger I don’t know how many times. Not including countless times he took it from me. I was incredibly embarrassed and humiliated that I was with someone who treated me this way. I still am
HG, is Greta Thunberg (and/or her mother) a narcissist?
I do not know with regard to her mother as I know nothing about her. With regard to Thunberg Junior, I have not studied her to provide an accurate assessment but I would state that from what I have seen and read in relation to her, there are indicators.
HG, I have to know. What indicators?
I don’t pretend to answer for HG but – in my opinion – everybody who puts themselves on a global stage as some sort of messiah should at least be regarded with suspicion – be she 16 or not. I think her age and looks actually work in her favour as these factors contribute to people regarding her and her intentions as pure, which they might not be. Now, I haven’t watched much of her material as the hype around her person throws me off, but I found this self-righteous gem in a quick search (If you watch the original speech you can see how fake the indignation actually is but this is just funnier): https://youtu.be/nUb4MovqcBY
Oh, perfect – I liked this a lot.
As an aside – in your other post about your having no need for certain emotions. I imagined something like a shark, that operates with perfect efficiency and doesn’t need sociable empathetic emotions. No point trying to reason with the shark or appeal to its better nature – it doesn’t have one.
Have you anything on rebuilding, post abuse? Short of going to the dark side and enrolling in shark school I mean. I feel so crushed – logical thinking running something like:
Don’t take anyone at face value, as turns out it’s easy to fake emotions and personality. No point admiring anyone famous, odds are high they’re a a sadist/pedophile. Don’t go anywhere alone with a man, they’re bigger than you and can attack you, no probs. Oh, you think revenge might make you feel better? Heads up, there’s nothing you can do legally that would make a dent, and anyway you’re not wired to enjoy that approach.
Fuck’s sake.
Everyday I hear your voice my head HG. LOOK TO THE LOGIC!
Sometimes I wonder why he doesn’t just say “ B***h wake the eff up!” Could you imagine 😂
But he does! . . . in so many words.
I totally agree with you. He has put in professional terms.
This is so very important HG that you should post it every week. Had I come across your work a year ago it would have saved me from myself and that last hoover. I knew, yet I still went back because I grabbed the few things that didn’t fit those bullet list narcissist profiles found online and gave it one last chance. I found your work after I had made every mistake, every excuse, gone back and left, went to the school of hard knocks doing all the things we do because we buy in to ET.
Cyn, you say HG would have saved you from that last hoover had you known about him sooner.
I don’t think HG could ever have saved me from any hoover until I hit rock bottom discard. In other words, HG could not have saved me until I REALLY experienced ALL that the Narcx was. Up until the most recent and very nasty extended discard (one year ago), I know I would have read HG and thought to myself, “Oh, no, that couldn’t be my Man.”
I had to be ready to listen to HG to understand and accept that, yes, that is my my man–my now Narcx.
Part of the problem is that I never had a big discard, he gave the corrective silent treatments. The devaluations while he was working on someone else it would cause me so much tension I would break up with him- he made it unbearable, then acted as if I abandoned him. But he never just vanished. He never quite fit all the criteria and left just enough wiggle room for me to think maybe he wasn’t REALLY a narcissist. All my ET. Plus he shed a tear. Had I heard about emotional thinking and the different schools and cadres and challenge fuel I wouldn’t have gone back the final time. Although I kept my promise to myself to leave if it started again (only took 2 months), it was worse than before, like a punishment, and the ptsd effects were worse, and the timing horrific with everything else.