The Narcissist´s 3 Assertions of Control
You will threaten the control of the narcissist and you will do so on a repeated basis.
Whatever position you hold in the narcissists fuel matrix, your actions, inactions and words will threaten the narcissists sense of control over you.
What then will the narcissist do? Naturally, he or she, being a creature of control must maintain or regain control over you. How does the narcissist do this? The narcissist asserts control in one of three ways.
This Logic Bulletin addresses
– What those three methods are
– The most common method of asserting control over you
– Your status as the Primary Protagonist
– What happens when one of the methods of asserting control fails
– Enabling you to understand why the narcissist has responded in a particular way, so that you now recognise that this is actually an alternative method of asserting control over you
– Recognising the absolute necessity of the need for control and your role within that.
This demystifies the narcissists behaviour in a simple manner enabling you to add to your armoury of defences, reduce falling prey to the lure of emotional thinking and avoiding the effects of confusion and bewilderment.
10 thoughts on “The Narcissist´s 3 Assertions of Control”
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I purchased this today.. Very enlightening.. I could relate the three assertions of control to specific situations I’ve encountered with the narc in my life recently.. So this is really informative and I highly recommend it..
Thank you Bekah B, HG approves.
Dearest Bekah B,
Hi beautiful butterfly, how are you ?
We miss you
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
Hello Bubbles!!
I have been faring well, for the most part.. Thank you for asking..
I’ve adapted into a busy life of caring for three children by myself, as well as working my job at the bank.. Any downtime moment I am able to come across I cherish to the fullest because Heaven knows my hands are otherwise full.. There’s always something to [physically] do!! Lol..
I’ve come back to the site because I’ve been in contact with my two youngests’ father recently.. Now, I feel like all of my progress I’ve made over an extended period of time, getting used to not having him in my life and all of the mental and emotional peace that comes with that has dissipated, unfortunately.. It seems he’s adamant about proving to me he is not who he once used to be and professes he wants to develop and maintain a healthy co-parenting relationship with me and relationships with our children when he comes back to the US from being deployed in the Middle East for almost a year now.. During the time of having communication with him, I have felt myself being manipulated by his words.. This has caused me to do financial errands for him, among other things.. And ultimately I just feel drained, used by him, all the while knowing in the back of my brain and deep in my heart this isn’t right.. Now, I’m trying to gain insight into what he is actually doing and what his motives may potentially be..
How have you been doing, especially during this time of global pandemic?
My God, my friend’s Narc ex showed up 15min after I left her apartment today. He’s been blocked everywhere thanks to your lifesaving work. He got past the security system at the front of the complex.
It was good I wasn’t there because she would have given mixed messages and I wouldn’t have known what to do, and I would have made him angry. Because if I don’t like someone it’s obvious, I wouldn’t have looked at him or spoken to him, etc.
He was furious at her for leaving after he took her out on her birthday – a benign manipulation. He is delusional, entitled, warped midranger and extremely angry.
Oh Wow Whitney and bloody good work!
Hope you enjoyed the day!
Hey Renarde I hope you’re doing well beautiful lady! Sorry I didn’t reply to some comments from you and Mommypino and now I’ve lost them.
Whitney
Hey no worries lovely. The comments move so fast!
I’m sleep deprived. Next door have been running their own ‘crap festival’ for three days now. Day 1 was tolerable but then their buds came in. All respectable, middle class and they stuck out a mile. But they just WOULD NOT go to bed until 2. Then I couldnt sleep. Then had weird dreams.
Oh and I’ve been spotted by the ‘sister’ FB group. Or ‘Disneyland’ as it’s now been called.
You ok?
Hey Renarde I’m sorry about your neighbours stopping you from sleeping 😳 I hope that ends soon and is a one-off.
I’m not sure what you mean about the Facebook group!
I’m trying to be productive like HG, rather than basking in fantasy and emotion.
So I’ve been completing tasks, and it gives me a dopamine hit or something like that! Selling my car, buying another car, working on my business, selling old junk, etc!
Whitney
Well, I dont think they’ve been here the last couple of days. They actually thsully seem like a lovely couple but it was their friends.
If you can bear Disney-Land, check out the comments on the recent Empath questionnaire. Very strange one is.
Good on bring productive. So am I, or try to be. Everyone in Blighty is EXTREMELY confused about Boris’s latest advice. So.i always make it a point to stop at 5 for more confusion, merriment and hijinks. I like to yell at the graphs but I do note they are improving.
They are now separating via job/profession. Males from the BAME community seem to be more disproportionately affected.
Keep well!