20 Fuelling Admissions



There are many things that my kind like you to say. We want to hear your praise, your affection, your love and your adoration. We want to hear your anger, your frustration, your upset and your vitriol. You hear words. We hear emotions which fuel us and cause the powering flames to burn fiercer and higher.

When you become ensnared by one of our kind, we make you a victim of our range of machinations. As part of this entrapment we aim to have you provide us with fuel and this is done by causing you to say certain things to us. We are obsessed with the concept of our status, our superiority and our power. We must always ensure that you are inferior to us, that we are in control and that you are obedient.

If we ever feel that this imbalance is slipping, then we will fight to maintain it. We are the conqueror you are the conquered. In keeping with this need for control and domination, we want you to not only be the victim but ensure that you act as one and portray your status of victimhood at all times in your dealings with us, save when we decide to the contrary.

The latter being usually for public appearances and the maintenance of the façade. We want and need to hear you reinstate your designated role. Of course this does not mean that you will declare that you are a victim, using those very words, because when we have you in our grasp you do not realise that you are indeed a victim.

Instead we need to hear it through you stating certain phrases which amount to admissions that you are a victim. Understand that when you make these remarks you are fuelling us and also reinforcing the imbalance that exists between you and us.

  1. I am sorry.
  2. I just didn’t think.
  3. I don’t know what I am supposed to do.
  4. I can’t understand what you want.
  5. I can’t take this anymore.
  6. I will do anything for you.
  7. I just want this to work.
  8. I’m not giving up on us.
  9. I deserve better than this.
  10. Why are you doing this?
  11. Please stop.
  12. Please talk to me.
  13. Am I not good enough for you?
  14. Why is it only me that is treated like this?
  15. I just want to be happy.
  16. Tell me what you want from me.
  17. I didn’t realise.
  18. I always put you first.
  19. I want to make you happy.
  20. What’s happened to us?

7 thoughts on “20 Fuelling Admissions

  1. HealingFromNarcAbuse says:

    I said some of these to my narcissistic mother on many occasions but the majority sound like what you would ask a romantic partner. I asked her questions many times when she gave me the silent treatment and always the one that apologized. She always gaslit me and told me that I was imagining everything although I knew I wasn’t. I wish I could go back in time and could ignore her when she gave me the silent treatment instead of giving her exactly what she wanted all along, my attention and my fuel.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Forget going back in time, you cannot and wishing to be able to do so is pointless. Instead address the present because you can control that.

      1. Healing says:

        You are correct about that HG; it is pointless to wish you could change the past. The present is definitely different; I don’t fall for it anymore because I’m now an educated empath and I speak out now to educate others who may have parents like mine. I have learned quite a bit on your site.

        1. NarcAngel says:

          It’s quite a revelation about a parent as opposed to romantic engagement with a narcissist isn’t it? All that matters is you know now and it’s great you are speaking out to other ACONs (Adult Children Of Narcissists).

          1. HealingFromNarcAbuse says:

            Yes, it sure is. I have been lucky that I had an awareness that I didn’t want to marry any one like my parents because I didn’t want to go through that again with a romantic relationship. The biggest thing was that I didn’t want my future children to have a repeat of a parent like mine so I really paid attention to the people I dated and how they reacted to things, if they got upset easily, etc.

  2. lickemtomorrow says:

    We both said the first one. Difference being, I meant it.

  3. karmicoverload says:

    Once again, guilty of most of these. He did a good job on me.

Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Next article

Sitting Target