The Narcissist and Money

Money is one of the most obvious ways in which one can demonstrate one’s power. Money provides options, it reveals opportunities and provides chances where none might have existed previously. Money equates to power and power equates to money. We have a healthy attitude to the question of money. What we create is ours. Yours is ours also. I have written previously how the successful of our kind exhibit our success and our power through the accumulation of money. It may be the creation of a successful business, the climbing of the corporate ladder into well-paid positions of responsibility and it might be the production of items and services that others require. There are of course those of our kind who have not grasped the concept that there is an unique opportunity afforded by the way that we are to be successful and in turn earn substantial amounts of money. Those of our kin who have not harnessed our special attributes in that manner are quite frankly a disappointment and they shall forever remain lesser narcs. Yes they are narcs but quite frankly they are not in my league or that of my high-achieving counterparts. I must admit to having nothing but contempt for those our kind who have failed to apply our abilities in this manner. They are letting the side down. That, however, is a topic for another day. What our less able kind and those of us who have embraced success do have in common is the unfailing ability to drain you of your financial health. How does this manifest? Perhaps some of the following will be familiar to you?
  • Never paying for drinks and meals when out together
  • Never contributing to joint expenses and then spending a small fortune on something for ourselves
  • Borrowing money repeatedly with a convincing tale of woe attached. The money is never re-paid.
  • Taking out loans in your name which you only find about some time later when they are in default
  • Learning the house has been mortgaged to the hilt and the advanced funds have been frittered away
  • Expensive addictions to drink, drugs, prostitutes and/or gambling which we expect you to bail us out of
  • Straight forward theft
  • Failing to honour maintenance and child support arrangements
  • Selling your possessions
Why does this happen? Sometimes it is about instant gratification. We want something and we want it immediately. We have always been used to getting our own way so whyshould it be any different when it comes to the question of money? We do not recogniseany boundary that says we should not have your money. It is in play and up for grabs.We want something and you can pay for it. This of course reinforces our control overyou by seizing your finances and goods we have you beholden to what we want to do.We show that we are in control and of course we anticipate horror, howls or protest andanger when you learn of our activity. All of which is good fuel. There is also an elementof retribution. We may have been denied something and this in turn offends our sense ofentitlement. We feel criticised and we want to get rid of that sensation. One method is to assert our power by taking what belongs to you and using it to our benefit. Sometimeswe do this an expend your financial resource in a totally excessive fashion which justwastes the money. To us however there is no waste in such a step. It underlines ourimportance, it affirms our power and it keeps you under out control.The scale by which our kind engages in this sequestration of the money and assets ofothers can vary hugely in scale, even when perpetrated by the same person. In that veinI am reminded of the late Robert Maxwell. For those of you who are unfamiliar with thename, Maxwell was a Czech born media mogul who operated a publishing empire in the United Kingdom. He fell off his yacht in 1991 and drowned. There is little doubt that hewas one of our kind – plenty has been written about the man and his behaviours whichconfirms that. Maxwell plundered the company pension scheme stealing hundreds ofmillions of pounds from the pensions of the employees leaving thousands of people infinancial difficulty. There was the misappropriation of the money of others on a massivescale. Maxwell was also found on Christmas morning by his wife and childrensurrounded by torn wrapping paper. He had wanted to know what had been bought forthe children. Rather than ask his wife, he went ahead and opened all the wrapped gifts.He did not take the gifts but he certainly trampled over a boundary and appropriated thesurprise that was meant for his children. Nobody is beyond our sense of entitlement when it comes to money or assets.

Money is used as an Assertion of Control

An appliance controlled through money

53 thoughts on “The Narcissist and Money

  1. ava101 says:

    HG,
    would you agree that certain narcs (psychopaths) such as Trudeau, Macron, and so on and on – are able to sell the wellbeing of a whole nation for money (and the illusion of power)?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      They are the nation state.

      1. Asp Emp says:

        HG, your words reminded me of The State and Revolution (1917), I found reading about it rather interesting.

        It is somewhat similar to what you are doing here = your Legacy.

        You are effectively leading a ‘social revolution’ and giving people a voice on your blog and on YouTube (and other places).

        It started with a personal ‘vendetta’ (your experiences, your ‘revolution’), your ‘fury’ (your ‘passion’) is what is ‘driving’ (determination) you which gave you the strength to start the ‘war’ (retaliation and revenge) on narcissism (and “Them” in your article ‘Burn. Burn. Just For Me’), your intelligence is the human ‘super-computer’ (like Deep Thought in Douglas Adams ‘Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy’) that, which, ‘ignited’ by your ‘journey’ of ‘I’ll teach them. I’ll teach them all**’ by applying the ‘black and white’ thinking of your writing and giving that to the ‘masses’ (the perceptions of narcissists and empaths to humankind).

        All** by taking the long ‘route’ (time, effort, patience, driven), ‘invading’ the world with your education and in doing so, the ‘boomerang’ will eventually hit “Them”.

        Hence why I ‘apply’ the dispensation of the “labels” RE: your article ‘The Good, The Bad and The Nothing Else’ and look at what you do here.

  2. ava101 says:

    Have (had) two parents like that. Detrimental.
    Most of my narcs later in life insisted on splitting costs always – had only comparatively few trying to live off me, but then full time.

  3. BC30 says:

    Argh! One more thing. HG, this Tinder Swindler guy couldn’t be a Greater, right? I mean he did get caught. His victims also describe being able to discern different masks, which I didn’t think was so obvious among the Greaters.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You will have to wait and see, he is going under the Tudorscope.

      1. Bubbles says:

        Dear Mr Tudor,
        I’m sensing many flaws in this scenario …. things just don’t add up. I very much welcome your Tudorscope
        Luv Bubbles xx 😘

      2. BC30 says:

        YESSSS! 🙌🧐❤️

    2. Rebecca says:

      BC30,

      I saw that on Netflix the other day. I thought it was funny when one of his victims got him to give her his clothes, sold them and took the money. The swindler got swindled. Lol And if I’m not mistaken, she also got him arrested by telling the authorities where he was going to show up next. Hysterical lol

      1. BC30 says:

        I was impressed! She really had to play it cool. I wonder what her school and cadres are. Yep. She was the one who reported him and got a small measure of revenge.

      2. Sweetest Perfection says:

        BC30, you said the exact same thing I did when learning HG will analyze this guy, haha! YESSS! Rebecca, the last woman was very brave. I also wonder, after seeing his outfits, don’t you guys see that obsession for wearing brand logos super tacky? Who do you think you are, a sponsored Formula 1 pilot, always showing the brand name of everything you wear?

        1. Rebecca says:

          SP,
          I bet he’s a somatic narcissist, just like my narcissist. Can’t wait to see what HG thinks! Lol

          1. Sweetest Perfection says:

            That’s what I believe too, just like my narcissist as well. At least mine likes reading and art, this guy only seems to like traveling from party to party.

          2. A Victor says:

            SP, I wondered about that also, but then I thought, he must be substantially more intelligent than my Somatic ex, who would’ve had delusions that he could pull this off but no chance of actually doing so. My Elite dad was smart enough to do it but had zero drive to. That’s why I went with Greater, but, he could be a Somatic Greater, not Elite…? The anticipation is growing…

            Ooohhh, and then I think…he didn’t seek out fanfare and publicity…so, a mid ranger…? But, he did things in such a big way, I think I have to stick with Greater…argh, the anticipation….

          3. BC30 says:

            Oh, he must be Elite, right? He has to have dome amount of intelligence, can’t be all sex appeal.

          4. A Victor says:

            That was my thinking also but now I’m starting to doubt it. None of the women has talked about him being particularly intelligent, I only assumed he must be to run scams like this. Maybe he appealed to their senses but kept his intelligence under wraps to use for his deceit? It was my guess though, so I’m sticking with it.

          5. Sweetest Perfection says:

            AV, maybe I have a very different concept because the only reference I have is HG, but unless I see this guy engaging in intellectual activities that manifest his cerebral side, I would say all that is shown in the documentary was purely somatic. Yes, he had a plan to defraud those women, but it was repetitive, it didn’t involve very sophisticated Machiavellian machinations other than relying on their good sentiments, and the objective was simply to burn the money traveling, going to clubs, and living la vida loca.

          6. BC30 says:

            Remains to be seen. I am betting on Elite. If I am wrong, I’ll buy you a drink.

          7. Sweetest Perfection says:

            Of my wine of choice?

          8. Alexissmith2016 says:

            AV

            Ooh good shout, somatic greater. I think you might be onto something there.

        2. BC30 says:

          So, tacky. Real wealth doesn’t flaunt itself.

          1. A Victor says:

            Haha, just like true Empaths don’t brag about it! 😁

          2. BC30 says:

            AV Do you see this message?

          3. A Victor says:

            Yes BC30, why?

          4. BC30 says:

            Because I had replied to one of your messages a while back and didn’t get a response. IDK if it was WordPress glitching or what. Anyhow, I’ve been away for a while. But I was recently talking about HG and thought I should pop in.

          5. A Victor says:

            BC30, I found one on this thread that I had missed, was that it? I did respond, I apologize for the delay, WP either didn’t notify me or I missed it, which is more unusual.

      3. BC30 says:

        I cannot believe she was able to stay so calm and collected when she met him to get the clothes!!! Maybe she’s a Normal or and SE? She was around for about 14 months she said, so longtime IPPS

        1. Sweetest Perfection says:

          BC30, I would have done the selling of clothes but I don’t think I would have slept with him one more time. I’m not a Judas.

          1. BC30 says:

            Hahaha that gave me a chuckle. I wonder why she did it? Playing the part or really enjoyed it? We’ll never know..

          2. A Victor says:

            Maybe he’s one of the good ones in bed? I mean, she’s only human…

          3. Sweetest Perfection says:

            But don’t you find it very hypocritical to call the police on your fiancé and then have sex with him? What if they show up to arrest him while in the act? Surprise!

          4. A Victor says:

            Haha, good point! Yes, hypocritical, but she did get the last laugh!

  4. BC30 says:

    Oh yeah–and he’s back at it without missing a beat after getting caught.

  5. BC30 says:

    OMG how have we not been talking about the TINDER SWINDLER?!?!
    I searched, but can’t find anything.
    I watched the Netflix movie, and this guy must be a narcissist!!
    An excellent love bomber, dear heavens. Thousands upon thousands of dollars from women who thought they were his one and only.
    Watching these women who were obviously empaths was heartbreaking.
    We’ve been in their shoes insofar as the shock that comes with realization.

    1. Bubbles says:

      Dearest BC30,
      The plot thickens with his Rabbi dad
      🤣😂
      What disturbs me is their ‘go fund me’ page whilst he’s dabbling in real estate, bitcoin and business consulting 🤥
      Luv Bubbles xx 😘

      1. HG Tudor says:

        What do you find disturbing about the Go FundMe page, Bubbles?

        1. Bubbles says:

          Dear Mr Tudor,
          What disturbs me is I personally don’t feel these girls should be generating funds from sympathy donations given by kind hearted people, especially when Simon the Sociopath is still living the dream. He should be held accountable for all the money he’s swindled from them and be made to pay it back himself. All of his assets should be liquidated.

          Sometimes fingers need a little singeing in order to learn a lesson. Case in hand, the first girl went straight back on Tinder. She’s clearly learnt zero, considering she met a complete stranger by herself to board a private jet to heavens know where and had sex within 24 hours of knowing him.
          I just get this feeling something’s not quite right with this story
          Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          1. HG Tudor says:

            Thank you for expanding. What do you mean by something not quite being right about this story.

          2. Bubbles says:

            Dear Mr Tudor,
            It’s my old empathic female intuition haha
            Too many inconsistencies, body language, behaviour, doubts and unanswered questions. One biggie springs to mind, the credit companies for starters, selling his clothes ……you know the little things haha
            I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re all working together
            I guess you’ll just have to prove me wrong ….hehe
            I just read …..in Australia this last year, romance cons reaped $131million ….not bad
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          3. BC30 says:

            OMG Bubbles don’t be a conspiracy theorist! Hahaha lol

          4. Bubbles says:

            Dearest BC30,
            Naaaah, I’m just throwing it out there for a think tank discussion with no stone left unturned and all avenues thoroughly investigated hehe
            You’re dealing with a very arrogant smooth operator here who’s extremely sophisticated at his game, knows his victims inside out, has been doing it for a very a long time and obviously incredibly successful

            I’ve grown accustomed to unexpected twists at the end 🤣
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

      2. BC30 says:

        Bubbles – Are you saying you’re disturbed by the victims’ GoFundMes? Like are you saying it’s a sad state of affairs that they need financial help while he’s back to living the high life?

        1. Bubbles says:

          Dearest BC30,
          Pretty much!
          He’s charging $250 ph giving business consultation advice. What does that say ?
          He’s with a new model girlfriend and still living the high life.
          It’s not right those girls should GFM… he should be paying them back
          Luv Bubbles xx 😘

    2. A Victor says:

      Hi BC30, nice to see you around! HG mentioned him in Nov 2020 in his video about Why Not to Use Online Dating! I didn’t pick up on it then, the Tinder Swindler was not in the US, that I’d heard of, so I didn’t pay any attention. I will have to be more observant going forward.

      He seems to pull out all the stops, similar to HG noticed, he’s not as good looking though!

      1. BC30 says:

        I’m here then Ns are not top of mind, and it’s difficult to pop in mid-conversation. Of course, he’s not a good looking as HG. That’s no contest! I’m absolutely fascinated by how these women fell for it. I mean I’m a Love Devotee, but damn even I know I’m not going to meet a billionaire on Tinder. Sheesh LOL

        1. A Victor says:

          Haha, I agree, loans for these guys?! I can’t see it. But, I did lose a small fortune to my ex, so I still fell for it. You’re always welcome to pop into my conversations! 😃

          1. Rebecca says:

            AV,
            I watched it a few weeks ago and while watching it, I was thinking, How is she going to get in a jet with a total stranger? Does she have any survival skills at all? Who does that? Would she have fallen for,Do you want to see my puppies in my van? An adult being that reckless,it just doesn’t seem realistic to me. I was thinking it was fake,made for tv, too.

          2. A Victor says:

            I know Rebecca! How could she be so reckless?! It was horrible to see that. Though, sadly, I likely would’ve done the same years ago, I did a lot of stupid and reckless things, I really didn’t understand that there were people with bad intentions in the world, or at least I thought, if I met up with one, I would be able to pick him/her out. Women have always been easier for me to spot. Men, not so much.

          3. BC30 says:

            Exactly! These women really thought they met a billionaire on Tinder for a LTR. Puppies in a van! 😂

          4. BC30 says:

            Ok, I guess my earlier comment didn’t go through. I met someone. It’s really early on, and I am fully present looking for red flags. I think he is an (ethically non-monogamous*) Empath. We do exist. I mean, I exist. We’ve internet searched each other while with each other and there are many other signs leading me to believe he is an Empath rather than Normal.

            *Search it online. I am a relationship anarchist, I’ve had to embrace it, but that’s a conversation for another day. I know what HG advises, yet I’m out here online dating. I know, I know. At least I know what to look for.

          5. A Victor says:

            BC30, is this the comment I missed? I am so sorry! I didn’t receive anything or I would’ve written back! I’m super happy for you, if it’s still good and going strong? I see this was six weeks ago or so. Is your initial thinking on him panning out? I hope so very much, for your sake, you deserve a good relationship, you’ve worked really hard to learn this stuff to make it possible. I do have a couple new phrases to look up now! Thank you! Btw, no judgement. It is massively difficult when there’s no one in your vicinity…

  6. Joa says:

    He: “You’re really funny. You don’t understand anything. Tell me, why do you go to work?”

    Me: “To work! To I am come true. To build something together and for it to be the best!”

    He: “You know most people go to work to get paid?”

    Actually. It’s funny. I understood. Thank you 😊
    So simple and so distant…

    Unfortunately, I still can’t change it.
    And still a few tiny leeches at work are attached to me. I let them 🙁

    1. k mac says:

      He would get fired then hired back! He would do crazy stuff and never get in trouble for it! I swear consequences NEVER landed on that guy!

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