Why Am I Drawn To Toxic Behaviours
You are an empath.
There are many great things about being an empath.
However, there are downsides and a significant one is that you are drawn to Toxic Behaviours more than other people.
Why is this?
This material will assist you in understanding, in clear and concise terms the following :-
The distinction between Toxic Behaviour and Toxic People
Who engages in Toxic Behaviours
Understanding the Empath-Narcissist Spectrum
Understanding the nature of narcissistic and empathic traits within this spectrum
Understanding the position of Emotional Empathy on the Empath-Narcissist Spectrum
Understanding the concept of Proxy Narcissism
How this operates to draw you to Toxic Behaviours
Why other people are not drawn to Toxic Behaviours
How your involvement with Toxic Behaviours pans out
As part of building your Logic Defences, understanding the impact and reason why you an an empathic person are drawn to Toxic Behaviours is fundamental.
Access this unique material through an audio file provided by email.
12 thoughts on “Why Am I Drawn To Toxic Behaviours”
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Hello HG, hope you are well?
Is it common for someone that has been in the types of narcissistic relationships as I have been in to be afraid to date? There are actually two men that have an interest in me, part of me would like to go out with either one of them, they are both really nice. However there is a part of me that does not want to get mixed up with another narcissist. I know the chance of both of them being a narcissist is very low, but stranger things have happened. I’m also questioning myself which is something I have never really done before. I question whether I’m simply interested in them or if it is just that old liking the attention, or are they really the type of person that I want to be with, you know that old self worth thing that someone has drummed into my head over the years? After thinking about what I just wrote, I already know your answer. Consult time! I’m still sending this it took too long to write. Haha! Xxx
Indeed consultation would assist through the application of logic. Such a degree of apprehension is understandable and actually useful as it generates caution which is no bad thing after having been abused. Nevertheless, such caution need not be a bar to finding a rewarding and healthy relationship.
Thank you HG. Talking this through with you is the best thing I can do, I believe I knew that all along. Xxx
Hi FM1T, whatever you decide following your consult, I hope it goes well for you. I do understand your apprehension, as such, I would feel / think similarly. It is good to read your comment & HG’s reply, as it can stabilise some thinking on my part. A little reassurance can go a long way.
Hi Asp Amp, I posted my comment to HG on here so that it might help others whether they are new to the site or have been around a long time. HG is always here to help, he’s literally a phone call away. I think it’s important for some to know they are not the only ones dealing with such apprehensions as I have. Depending on the abuse you have suffered it can be down right terrifying! The good thing is that I can hear HG in my head saying that is your emotions talking now let’s put that aside and use some logic. It just happened that this time the logic I came up with was to talk to HG. I know Im addicted to narcissists and it’s something that will never go away, they are my drug of choice. I guess I see HG as my sponsor and I know to stay clean he will always be right here to help. Asp don’t ever forget that help is always just a phone call away. Your fears and apprehensions no matter how big or small are always important to HG and the people on this site. Xx
Hi FM1T
Viewing HG as your sponsor is such a great way of looking at it, and advice to others as well. Well done you.
Hi NA!
Thank you! I was hoping if it works for me it might help others also. Hearing from you just made my heart smile. Best Sista ever! ❤️🤗
HI FM1T, thank you for your encouraging words. For me, having trust in myself (trusting my instincts) comes before putting my trust in other people. Yes, past experiences can & do have an impact yet history (patterns) repeating itself (lack of awareness) simply because of the past. Having access to HG’s work, when applied & utilised effectively, the ‘pattern’ can be prevented in the future. Maybe, for some of us, the past abuse / traumas were too much to venture out into the dating field, so to speak. The environment is a factor to be considered ie the right place, the right time, the right people. It is about safeguarding oneself (and others), for the right reasons. HG has maintained that he needs empaths who access his work to succeed & thrive (not purely by just survival) because that is also a ‘win’ for him, his Legacy. xx
Hello FM1time:
I hear you. Divorced in April from my one and only Narc but it left his mark. I am content on my own, full life but I prefer a relationship and I prefer intimacy and yes romance with a man. I turned down a really good man over logistics. But he is still around. I have met another, I say it’s for fun but I get attached but narcs do teach you to hold out on trust….
If it helps FoolMe:
I have developed an aversion of men, I got divorced from my narc in April but…I have had aversion to those seeking a true relationship. Not to lovers. I have had great moments with a young rugby player barrister in London. I am to meet oddly a young pro footballer school teacher in Denmark. While I know that I pick men I meet in person on travels miles away, it’s because I am not ready. Although the first lasted 7 years .. and he asked me twice to marry him….I asked HG if this switch from a 12 year relationship/ marriage to having flings was an erosion of emotional empathy? He said “ no.” I guess it’s ok to have fun after an abusive narc relationship.
Hi Contagious, I’m glad you found something that works for you. Unfortunately for me I do not get to travel a lot. Also I am a codependent and have found my biggest weakness is narcissistic men. At this time I’m looking more for companionship, the last 3 years of living on my own have been very rewarding and I’m not giving that up. I also know if I choose wrong another narcissist could talk me into anything. Age doesn’t matter either, younger or older wouldn’t make a difference. Been there done that. Thanks Contagious.
Well good luck to us both! Single!