Questioning Me
Do feel free to ask me anything you like. I am here for you to dip into my mind and for you to benefit from learning how I view the world. No question is off limits and if you want to establish a dialogue with me, then so much the better. You will be helping me so I can show the treatment team that I am interacting with people in this setting. You can ask me why I do certain things, what am I thinking, what my favourite food is, whatever you like. This is your chance to extract as much knowledge and information from me as you possibly can. If you want to just make a statement, go ahead. Fill your boots. I don’t know you so I won’t fly into a rage (this does happen when people I know question me but that is because they have an agenda – you don’t because we don’t know one another). I look forward to hearing from you.
5,487 thoughts on “Questioning Me”
Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)
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So, I found the Full English breakfast conversation interesting. I was unaware, so I wanted to dig. According to the English Breakfast Society:
“We here at the Society believe that frozen hash browns and french fries are used as a cheap breakfast plate filler, served by people who probably buy cheap imported bacon and sausages to use in their so called English breakfasts, and who have probably never heard of bubble and squeak.”
I’d really like to try it someday. Looks delicious! I must admit I’m surprised about the hash browns because to me they’re a breakfast staple, along with pancakes or waffles if I’m really putting on the feed bag. Color me embarrassed when I looked up bubble and squeak. Bit disappointed as I was hoping the English breakfast included a side of sex. But more food is okay, I guess.
Congratulations on 200k subscribers on YouTube, Mr. Tudor!
Thank you Leigh.
Big congratulations für 200.000 people on YouTube HG!!!
How does it feel for you?
About time.
Dear Mr Tudor,
“I never said that”
“It’s not me in that photo”
So, anything I’ve ever said or will say, consider it a “translation error”🤣
Looks legit, Bubbles.
I believe it’s been confirmed the translators got it right the first time !
200000 subscribers on Youtube! Congratulations on overtaking the population of the country of Curaçao . Maybe you would like to celebrate with a glass of Curaçao liqueur, which is described in Thackeray’s Vanity Fair as a drink for dissolute young men (characterisation according to Wikipedia). Cheers, you dissolute young devil!
Hi Mr Tudor,
I think at this point you definitely got that ‘man of mystery persona’ going on and many just wonder about you, including myself. Even from day 1 when I started getting your videos in my you tube feed, I admit at first, I thought you were amongst the many individuals looking for there 15 minutes of fame on the internet and then I started getting more of your videos that started resonating in my own life and you got my attention. I saw you were for real and seriously helped me deal with Narcissists in my past and till few yrs ago as well. I get the anonymity thing as I’ve kind off gathered that sugar posse and some narcs (Especially Ms. Markle) got some fantasy to go out in a posse to string you up or foaming at the mouth whenever you do a broadcast (Which I doubt will ever happen). I think your interesting, a trip, a professor of the human scene and your just in a category all your own in a good way. Even though, for some odd reason ‘you still’ keep getting pegged for Piers Morgan by the sugar posse (yeah, yeah I know there’s the British expression for this (Lol) , but the American equivalent of this figure of speech means just trying to figure out a person,place,thing etc.) but it’s possible that two people can sound alike as I’ve learned this from traveling in my own social circles for many yrs., it can happen. Seems you’ve been everywhere in this realm of Narcissism literally. So, to me? You might be some Sith Lord, but even Anakin Skywalker asked for help from Chancellor Palpatine for the questions he had, (I know, Science fiction geek coming out in me here with this sentence) when he had questions nobody else could answer and someone like yourself has been answering mine in the realm of Narcissism. So, I will continue to be curious about you and see where you’re going with your work. Thanks, from myself.
You are welcome.
Questions, thank you HG
1. Have you read “The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What To Do When a Parent’s Love Rules Your Life” by Dr Patricia Love and Jo Robinson? No I’m not making up the book or doctor’s name.
2. Do you think “emotional -ncest” refers to a dynamic between a narc parent and their kid?
3. What word or term is more accurate than “emotional -ncest” (seriously I found the book’s content depressingly relatable but I loathe using the word -ncest).
4. Is “enmeshment” more accurate or appropriate?
5. Can non-narcissist parents engage in this with their kids?
1. No.
2. It could do.
3. Dynamic.
4. That would also apply.
5. Yes, but not with the same intensity or time period.
Dear WiserNow,
Do feel free to jump in! I always enjoy a third…
Part of my anthropological training involved analyzing cultural origin myths, which tend to become the catalyst for or embedded within a group’s religion. Satan is one of my favorites. I see him everywhere and he offers a little bit of everything, from Trickster to Devourer. I also think it’s interesting that both Lucifer and the Christian hero are both called ‘morning star.’ I agree with you with understanding my former religious text as a collection of stories. I understand more about it now that I’m not married to it. And it’s much more interesting.
Enjoyed your comments.
Thank you Allison, I enjoy your comments too.
You have a very naughty, but also very funny, sense of humour. Most of the time, I find myself both laughing and cringing a little bit at the same time while reading them.
Your comments are always engaging though, so thank you!
Thank you, WiserNow. I’m not to everyone’s taste. I’ve always been a bit salty. Yet, I’m scandalized when I see animal mating rituals in nature shows. Absolute filth.
I know what you mean, Allison.
Can’t those lascivious, exhibitionistic scoundrels get a room?! FFS!
That reminds me… when I was little, I went to the zoo with my family. As we were looking at the elephants in their enclosure, guess what a couple of elephants started doing…?
Yes, they did. And it made the human observers giggle and laugh and look around at each other a little awkwardly 🐘🙊🤣
H G, I saw a comment under one of your youtube videos that said you have detailed your childhood experiences with your mother on this site. I cannot seem to find it. What is the article entitled?
Love Is a Taught Construct is one of the articles.
HG: I watched a recent YouTube, I think with Doug referring to empaths with low self esteem. I am assuming that has to do for allowing abusive behavior. Self esteem is not linked to class, wealth, sex, race etc… and is formed at childhood. You also I believe added that usually one of the parents would be a narc. Thus, the cycle of abuse. What others would find shocking in a relationship dynamic would be normal in someone raised with “ drama” or abuse. I get that but I also see empathy as a necessary among the human race whether it is keeping a baby alive, building communities, brotherhood in an army, piety to God as this life is short but eternity is long and also note that many religions proclaim humility, humbleness or in Buddhism the elimination of the ego centric self to achieving nirvana. Normals have it too. Most. So the species has not weeded it out. You say narcissists don’t suffer self esteem issues. I assume ASPD don’t either. Although the creature inside has none it seems. I guess my question is the correlation between self esteem and empathy? Is there one? And if having a lower priority for the sense of self is perhaps a good thing as it generates empathy? Is there a correlation also between individualism versus community too? the selfish narc and psychopath puts his needs ahead of others often at the expense of others. Look at the environmental issues. We coexist on Earth no matter what type. I see you discuss the success of narcs ie jobs phones, music, literature and even some politics. But despite JFKs persona his “ Ask what you can do for your country and not what the country can do for you” platform resonated with many empaths. The end of slavery, the healing of others, education of youth and so many other aspects of society require empathy. Society would fail without it. So it troubles me that empaths are linked to low self esteem. I wonder although they have the mishap of tolerating abuse more than others or are addicted to it if it is their strong sense of self, their core love of themself that allows them to take on the hardships and vicissitudes of life better? For example MLK Jr or Gandhi? Or Mother Theresa? ( Of course, Jesus) I see them as the ultimate empaths the type who take on the greatest abuse, the greatest risk , carry the great problems of the world at risk to their very lives? Giving their lives… for nothing other than the greater good ( or God). My heroes. What’s your thoughts on this? I don’t see them as just empaths with low self esteem ? Far from doormats? They created great historical, political and social change through love ( or God’s love working through them). Empathy is strength to me. Great strength? It’s survived in most since the dawn of time and therefore babies survive. The human race.
There are many articles on attachment style. Would this be the same thing? And this is my analogy, my plain language: if a mother is a deficient mother or “emotionally void mother” ( no matter why… neuroscience, genes, mental pathology, biology such as sickness, drug or alcohol addiction) then the child ages 0-9 does not know LOVE well but craves for it. Genetically wired to survive. The infant wanting attention, nurture, care, validation ( sense of self) as well as the ability to get it : FUEL and CONTROL exists innate as well as the desire ( although less as a child 0-9 ) wants play, toys, entertainment, more food, more safety and shelter: RESIDUAL BENEFITS. Let’s call all of it LOVE. The PRIME AIMS of a human being. A child 0-9. Now the child or ( starved of LOVE creature) Idevelops into an adult. A FALSE one who is able to lie, manipulate through pity plays and tantrums and sulking among others, bullly, and charm and mirror to achieve what the child 0-9 could not. As the adult still yearns for the LOVE or PRIME aims. Perhaps types of narcs of the FALSE SELVES develop skills to do this on what worked best in the family environment so a lesser learned that screaming and violence works. A middle learned silent treatments, sulking, pity plays and some charm work. A greater was aware of all that works and for some reason why it’s needed. (? Genetics? Intelligence?) Why it’s called a defense mechanism versus a man made sword to survive, I don’t know. The beginnings were harsher like when the Spartans put an end ant into the Forrest to ensure only the strongest and physically healthiest remained or a child raised by wolves ( prey). Since evolution tends to favor the survival of the species no doubt that’s why there are more normals and empaths as a baby must live and empathy ususally plays a strong role in that. And that’s why the idea a child 0-9 could survive without empathy is intriguing. A fake empathy emerges as the FUEL allows it to survive. But what of the CREATURE? Is it necessary? Why does it still exist inside the narc? It doesn’t seem needed for survival unless it is the acorn to the tree. It is the spark that keeps the fire going and the quest to continue. And ASPD makes no sense. Perhaps so genetically altered there was never a need for love or empathy or fuel at day one. Just built like robots. This is why they are hardest to understand. What do you think ? Am I correct in my overall analysis? Of course it’s from studying your works I ponder.
In the beginning of the relationship, I had left the narc at my place for couple hours.
When I came back my entire living room had been moved around, heavy furniture TV and all. Why on earth did narcissist do that? They said it was just nicer that way and they loved moving things around. But now that I know ur work I wonder the true cause for a narcissist to engage in such weird behavior. Thanks.
On the basis that the person is a narcissist, this was done
1. Out of a sense of entitlement.
2. A lack of accountability.
3. A lack of boundary recognition.
4. A sense of superiority (he knows your house and furniture better than you)
5. To provoke a response from you to bring you under control and draw fuel from you.
HG, have you seen The Killer (2023)? I couldn’t help but think about your Psychopath series every time the protagonist repeated his mantra: “Empathy is weakness. Weakness is vulnerability.” The film is plagued with references to songs by The Smiths, though. Even for a huge fan like myself it became an overdone leitmotif towards the second half of the movie.
No, I have not seen that film or programme.
Hi HG,
I’ve recently watched a few documentaries on Frank Sinatra and it struck me how many narcissistic behaviours/characteristics I could see, after watching your videos.
Do you think he was a narcissist?
My reasoning:
– his mother was “domineering” and determined her son would be successful regardless of the law (could this go part way to determining her as a narcissistic?)
– he was born into poverty, not that this alone would create a lack of control environment; I’d need to do more research
– he prefers to work as a solo rather than in a band
– he had a succession of many partners/affairs without any time between, including stories of abuse
– his continued involvement with certain nefarious people giving him power in Hollywood and Las Vegas, despite his legal issues because of it
– his career choice
– his stoush with Tommy Dorsey enlisting the mafia
– he had a short and viscous temper
– his tempestuous relationship with Ava Gardner (she was the only woman he couldn’t control, according to others) and suicide threats while married to her (I suspect to gain that control). A case of 2 narcissists clashing?
– the suspicious death of a deputy sheriff a few days after he humiliated Sinatra at Calneva
– he changed political alliances after being rejected by JFK, to regain his political influence
– Jekyll and Hyde personality
– said that he wanted to be able to snap his fingers and people would immediately do what he required
– his controlling and abusive treatment of Mia Farrow
– he thought he was above the law
– it’s said that he rewrote history when getting his gambling licence back and lied under oath about his involvement with the Mafia
– there are many more examples
I can’t see much mentioned about his relationship with his children.
The contradictions I see are his desire to break down racist barriers and philanthropy. Were these just facade management?
Am I seeing thing correctly? Do you think Frank Sinatra was a narcissist?
Yours in curiosity,
Elke
You would need to use Know the Narcissist to find out whether Ol´Blue Eyes was a narcissist.
Hi HG,
I discovered you a few months ago and have become somewhat addicted to your channel. It’s absolutely fascinating and terrifying all at once.
Apologies if you have already addressed this (I’m still catching up), but something I’ve been wondering about, is what determines the subclass of Narcissist a person will become? From my observations it doesn’t appear to be their background, money, abuse, education, death of a parent etc., but more the underlying intelligence of the person. Is this correct?
Yours in fascination,
Elke
Intelligence is only one factor of many which is used to determine the relevant sub school of narcissist.
I’m happy I got one aspect. What other factors do you include in the determination of the subclass? Or have you already produced an answer to this question? If so, I’ll definitely watch/read it. I’m finding the subject of Narcissism absolutely fascinating, and your explanations are the first to resonate with me. I thank you.
There are a myriad of factors which establish the sub schools, with similarities and variances, too detailed for me to explain in a reply here. I recommend you keep reading and listening to my work and you will steadily build up an understanding of the various factors. Certain articles show you the comparisons between the relevant sub schools also.
This is not an email. HG will you be doing an interview with Dr Jordan Peterson in the future? Please advise. Maybe he’d like to vent his Spleen?
No.
How about the Tudorscope? I was surprised at Russel’s interview with him. Russel , a narc, was child like, seemed in awe and almost groveling for attention and validation. Why?
Dear Mr Tudor,
I was hoping you’d cover Table 12’s utterly utterly disrespectful smug smirk during Canada’s National Anthem.
It’s been suggested she MAY have been smirking at the Autistic singer, but we can’t be sure, if she did, that would be even more than despicable.
No class, no manners, no decorum, no respect, no empathy, no morals, no scruples, no dress sense whatsoever. Her whole demeanour is extremely unbecoming. I would be shamefully embarrassed if she were my daughter.
She is abusing and degrading her Duchess title to the fullest by throwing it in everyone’s face and not giving a rat’s arse, as she knows she’s untouchable. I certainly hope the Invictus Games Management took note.
Harry should be extremely embarrassed, ashamed and disgusted with himself for not manning up ! What will it be next ?
I had the pleasure of going to a Canuck’s game in Vancouver, it was an event I respected, a memory I’ll forever appreciate and never forget.
I am late in taking the Weaponized Empath but glad I took it after devouring books, being on this blog, watching most ( can’t watch all on Markel) if not all his YouTube and buying packages. I am as a Tower and a Sanctuary. Again it feels like HG has placed a scope in my brain. I feel like a tower of strength now as knowledge is power. And yes, HG, I will do the maintenance. Your tower is safe! My weakness is the sanctuary as I try to help others by referring them close to me or a stranger to his work. Many have. Most of all I use his information and “ plagarize” the advice to others in need ! Sorry! lol My nature is to help and to follow my Faith first by doing so. This won’t change despite the risks but HG reminds me of the risks of me being me. So I recommend this HIGHLY. One of the most helpful investments I have made to date. My question is: are you putting chips in our brains HG? Are you really an alien who can read minds?
Rebecca,
https://narcsite.com/2015/09/29/questioning-me/comment-page-13/#comment-450412
thank you for your reply, it as good to read 🙂 . It is good that you retain the positive memories about your dad and the close bond you had with him. I am glad that I was a comfort to you when you needed it 🙂 xx
So good to have the master about the house, HG. Welcome back. And just in time, too–my levels were starting to get low.
Dear HG, you have likely heard this before, but so far I have not come across it, so please excuse me if it is repetitive:
If defenseless person B lives in constant fear of being attacked and, at the same time, is closely connected to extremely powerful person A, one way of securing protection, albeit unconventional, would be to generally make a nuisance of oneself, threaten and annoy A to such an extent that A resolves to put B behind bars and thereafter takes every measure to keep the prison walls intact and impenetrable at all times.
You see, of course, where this is going. By imprisoning the Creature and guarding the prison so diligently, you are effectively keeping him safe from external harm as well. If he cannot escape, then there is not much that can penetrate the walls from outside to get to him either. As long as you gather fuel, he remains protected.
If we were to consider this as a possible explanation and there was an alternative way of keeping him protected and quiet, how interested would you be in exploring it?
That does not make sense. If B lives in constant fear of being attacked they would not make a nuisance of themselves and annoy A, because the most likely response of A to such provocation would be to crush B.
This reminds me of AMP and EP. It was a series Sam Vatnim did to say AMP is the organized false self and EP co-exists as the compartment of the emotional trauma. They are always at war. AMP represses EP but EP keeps emerging in a never ending cycle. Like everything Sam says it’s filled with citations and lengthy confusing terms so hard to follow.
Dear Mr Tudor,
Just so you know, I’m here for the things that make people …..feel
“🤣”
How did Man City become your team?
Thank you
I commenced supporting them, thus they became my team.
Dear Mr Tudor,
I bought myself a pair of black Leah sunglasses, $4 from the op shop! I can see out of them at the front and from left to right. They have air vents on the sides……cool eh ? 😎
You should receive a shifty badge for your selection.
Dear Mr Tudor,
Why thank you!
I didn’t need them to see behind me, as we mothers already have eyes in the back of our heads 🤣
Btw how have you been, it seems like forever?
I am excellent well, thank you for your kind enquiry.
Dear Mr Tudor,
I try to always be kind !
I sense you’ve been away on the upmost of importance!
Did all go accordingly ?
I was effective.
HG what are your thoughts of joint custody with a Narc or ASPD? Can these types make good fathers at all? Give anything to their children if courts insist on joint. In my case, I got joint custody with an ASPD. It worked out well. My ex and I were no contact by both of us but he was an ok father and my daughter thrives and loves him. I don’t think he was a narc nor did the court appointed child evaluator and psychologist ( top in the OC CA). What are your thoughts? What if you got a woman pregnant? Would you offer a child anything? Would you want joint custody ( assuming you pay more in the %);)
There will always be some kind of problem with such individuals, but certain of these types are worse than others when it comes to the issue of children. There are various different examples I can give of that but time does not permit me to do so.
Dear Mr Tudor,
I submitted a formal complaint to the Naval Foundation against Harry and TOW being at the Navy Seal opening! What an absolute
despicable pair ! How dare they ?
Dear Mr Tudor,
I’ve just sent another email to the Canadian Invictus Whistler as well! Why the hell not, as they say?
Dear HG
Please can you analyse and dissect the characters in the series “Dexter”
Dexter of course (Psychopath- Narcissistic or pure psychopath?)
Especially Harry and Deb Morgan (Narcissists or empaths?)
Dr Vogel (Narcissist?)
Quinn- is he an empath?
Harrison and his mother Rita (empath?)
Thanks!
Hi HG,
I’ve recently discovered your YouTube channel and am addicted. While I hesitate to bolster a narcissist, you’re a legend! Thank you so much for revealing the Matrix to me. So many questions about people I know/have known have been, and will continue to be, answered.
I have so many questions, but I’ll start with this one: While bearing in mind I understand narcissism is a human trait, can a company be narcissistic? If it’s run by narcissists, would that attract more narcissists to the fold? Thereby creating a narcissist culture? Or is that too much of a “good” thing and it would eventually implode?
Thank you for the compliments about my work.
A company cannot be narcissistic as it is not a human entity. It could have a narcissistic culture because of the way it is run. It would not necessarily follow that it would implode.
Thanks, HG. I didn’t think you’d seen my post. I must have scrolled too quickly.
Mr. Tudor–
Regarding: “A company cannot be narcissistic as it is not a human entity. It could have a narcissistic culture because of the way it is run. It would not necessarily follow that it would implode.”
1. Does the same hold true of charities? That they can have a narcissistic culture?
2. Are there good ways of quickly recognizing charities that have a narcissistic culture?
Thank you so much for your time. Much appreciated.
1. Yes.
2. There are ways of identifying such a culture in such environments, but no, I am not going to detail them in a comment.
HG,
Didn’t you recently do a video about the work place environment and narcissium? Please can you extend it? Thank you for your time and replies xx
Thank you, sir.
Regarding: identifying narcissistic environments in charities
“no, I am not going to detail them in a comment.” — How did you read my mind?
Thank you so much for your time. Much appreciated.
Hi Dani,
I believe any company can have a narcissitic environment, including churches. The last church I was going to had a Pastor, who felt it was right of him to tell the members who to vote for, for President and felt politics was a topic meant for church discussions. There were nasty fights amongst the members over politics, that he would start on sunday mornings. I left the church, during one of the heated discussions.
Hello HG, is Oskar Schindler on the Tudorscope list?
Not at present.
Mr. Tudor–
1. Did you have a favorite costume that you wore for Halloween as a child?
2. Did you ever dress up as Darth Vader?
3. Did you have a favorite candy as a child?
Thank you so much for your time. Much appreciated. Hope all is going well for you.
1. No.
2. Yes.
3. Sarsaparilla tablets.
Thank you, sir.
Did you ever dress up as any other Star Wars characters?
Yes.
Which other Star Wars characters did you dress up as, please?
Thank you so much for your time.
I bet you made an awesome miniature Darth Vader (assuming that you dressed up as Vader as a child).
There is nothing miniature about me, I stand tall.
Dear HG,
Was it OB1, Seth Lord or a Storm trooper?? Xx
Who is Seth Lord, some hill billy?
Dear HG,
Seth Lord, a hillbillie? 🤣🤣Why yes, how did you guess? 🤣🤣😁xx I bet you dressed up as the Emperor. 😁xx
Dear HG,
Noticing my mistake of Seth Lord and not Sith Lord….he’s Vader’s cousin, on the redneck side. 😁😄xx
Dear HG,
Seth Lord lives in Birmingham Palace, in Alabama and he plays a banjo. 😁😆🫣🤣xx
I don’t know if it’s a joke about sarsaparilla tablets or if there’s some local story behind it, but anyway it reminded me of my own story.
During communism in my country (one of the main producers of, among others, sugar beet!), most products and goods were exported, so there were no longer enough products for our citizens. One such product was sugar. It was a luxury product.
When a product finally appeared in the store, people passed the information by word of mouth and stood in queues several hundred meters long, with entire families, several times – for many hours. Most goods were rationed – e.g. 2 kg of sugar and 1 pack of coffee per buyer.
As children, we craved the sweets that were secreted. Due to the lack of products, very creative baked goods and cakes were created. Most women, who remember those times, are still able to prepare “something from nothing”, e.g. a delicious three-course dinner using only 3-4 products.
Coming back to tablets, which were HG’s favorite sweet from childhood (?). Desiring a sweet taste, we bought vitamin powder for babies and small children at the pharmacy, which had to be dissolved in water. It was called “Vibovit”. We would tear open the sachet and dip our saliva-covered fingers in it, then put them in our mouths and enjoy the sweet taste of the orangeade-flavored powder.
Sometimes, my mother gave us some sugar and some cocoa. We mixed it at the bottom of the cup and very slowly ate it from the tip of a spoon. I ate 20 grams of sugar and cocoa for several hours with breaks, prolonging the pleasure. One savored and appreciated every sweet crystal.
I also remember, that I cut “Donald” chewing gum with a knife and from one piece of gum I had as many as 8 pieces of gum, that would last for 8 days. But when I felt like making balloons, I had to eat 4 pieces at once. You had to choose – rubber for a longer time or balloons for a shorter time 🙂
Of course, we also found the sweet taste in nature, e.g. by picking acacia flowers from trees and eating them, or the soft, inner tips of tall grasses and cereals, or mulberry fruits, and many, many other plants.
Joa,
Your comment was very interesting to read and showed very clearly how much children like sweets and how people react to a shortage of something.
It reminded me also of a story that my father has told me.
When he was a small child, there was rationing of many things after the end of WWII. Where he lived, people could not access certain things because of shortages. It was also difficult to buy things because either the items were not available or were too expensive.
One of the items that was rationed was jam or marmalade. It may have been rationed because of shortages of sugar for the same kinds of reasons you have explained.
My father has told me that when his family was able to obtain jam through rationing, the jam came in very small packages, roughly the size of a lid that we now see on top the jars of jam in supermarkets. The jam was thick and solid too, more like a type of fudge rather than soft and runny like most jams nowadays.
The rations of jam were wrapped in paper, probably some kind of waxed paper that was used to wrap food. They were not packed in glass or plastic or other solid forms of packaging.
My father told me that the children (him included) were so excited and engrossed by the sweet delicacy, and there was so little of it to enjoy, that when the jam was finished, they would lick, chew and eat the paper that the jam was wrapped in because it was sweet and tasted like the jam.
Another story that my mother told me was that when the little girls would play after the end of the war, they found broken cups and saucers on the ground around their former homes. They didn’t have dolls to play with so they pretended. They used corn cobs in the husk that still had the tufts of fine roots attached. The little girls would pretend that the corn cobs were dolls and the fine roots on the corn were the dolls’ hair. They used the corn cobs with the broken teacups and saucers to have a little tea party.
I am not sure if you are still answering questions…
1. Did you enjoy telling me the dog story in any way or was it simply an answer?
2. You say “treatment team” which makes me curious about what situation has you answering to a treatment team…do you share in some place I have missed?
1. It was an answer.
2. You should read more extensively on the blog.
Does Alastor know you under your real identity or an alias?
Does she know you have aliases and, if so, does she know how many and what they are?
Do you call her by the name Alastor when you talk to her, or by her real name, or an alias?
And does she know that you are HG Tudor? If so, is she your gatekeeper?
1. An alias.
2. Yes. No.
3. By her real name.
4. Yes. One of them.
Mr. Tudor–
1. Does Alastor know that Alastor is your alias for her?
2. How many gate keepers do you have?
Thank you so much for your time. Much appreciated.
1. No.
2. I am not releasing that information.
Thank you, sir. So good to have you back!
Thanks HG, for coming back to the blog, it’s much appreciated the time you spend here and the answers and help you give us. Xx
Great questions Pat A N!
HG, on youtube would you read people’s reddit posts on narcissists (like on raisedbynarcissists) and tell them what to do or what’s going on? I mention you but often don’t know which books, videos, articles, assistance packages, etc. to recommend. People need you there. Dr Plagiarizer has done it, and now I wonder how much bad advice she’s given. Thank you.
If you were to recommend to me certain posts to comment on I may be interested to comment further in a video, particularly to show up Dr Plagarizer´s incompetence.
I am afraid Dr Plagiarizer is referred to by some good empathic relationship advice youtubers
“and Dr… has said that: …”
when speaking about narcissists.
Then it behooves people to point out that she ought not to be relied on.
Dr Plagiariser was quoted recently as saying that, “narcissism is on a spectrum.”
If I was feeling kind I could assume that she is referring to the fact that all categories of person have narcissistic traits and for the vast majority (empaths and normals, even narcissistic people to a degree) these traits are expressed in a healthy way. Only when you reach the top of the spectrum does narcissism become problematic (those with NPD.)
However, being less kind I could point out that DP’s statement is wholly misleading. It suggests that one person with NPD is less of a narcissist than a second person with NPD. Or, some people with NPD are less problematic than others, due to there being a spectrum of narcissism. This is both misleading and dangerous in that it furnishes empaths with false hope that maybe, just maybe, THEIR narcissist is more manageable than the others. They can deal with THEIR narcissist. Or with raging ET in support, “ Love will find a way, we can work on this. I just need to be more understanding of his narcissism.”
That’s what bugs me about DP. She’s woolly. She leaves that shadow of doubt out there for ET to capitalise on because actually, she doesn’t know her subject well enough.
Plus, she’s hellish irritating to listen to, haha!
Agreed TS6157.
Truthseeker: I wondered about the spectrum myself and it is evidentially clear to me that some narcs and psychopaths are worse than others. For example, my ex husband was diagnosed ASPD during a custody evaluation. I got 80% but I was told some criminals make good fathers. At the time, I was horrified. Ted Bundy would make a good father I said? The child psychologist said not all psychopaths are the same. Some are not blood thirsty and studies show children do better with both a father and a mother. She will get her stability and nurture from you. It just takes one. She was right. He was an ok father. While or whilst ( lol) no conformity to rules, regulations or laws, he was good at discipline ( better than me) teaching business skills like savings and he reveled in her success claiming it as his own and while a multimillionaire paying for nothing and carting her 10% of the time. … he showed up. He even marched with her during a parade where she was the baton soloist in kindergarten to my utter disbelief. He calls her “ one hell of a kid” and takes credit for her numerous achievements. ALL HIM. lol I don’t care as I give her the credit always marveling at her individual and utterly her own hard work and talents. BUT he is not Ted Bundy. So there is a scale of abuse or those more manageable than others. There are narcs who are more frequent in abuse. There are genetic and environmental variable that differ among all humans. But why doesn’t the DSM have a spectrum like autism versus narcissism? . I think there are several criteria to differentiate the two. With narcissism anyway the end result is “ problematic.” Problematic is not good no matter what the level or the frequency of abusive behavior. Repeated silent treatments aren’t murdering a school of children at a playground but both are “problematic. “ So I can see both sides but I can’t see a way to manage “problematic “ any better than a criminal system or overall the legal system tries (to avoid vigilantes ) does already and if the abuse is not at that level of criminal harm say rape, murder, pedophillia, grand arson but at a “ civil” level of lies deceit, theft, fraud, conversion , breach of contract ( form of deceit or theft) then it lies in relations. Good advice to avoid problems for a happier life. To know then go. My point is the behavior creates a spectrum for the legal system to handle. But I do see some behaviors as more problematic then others…that is a sort of “ spectrum.” But how would one break it down to manage outside a legal system? How would one classify beyond murderous narc? How would one know until the act occurred to classify? 2 silent treatments means you are C, three means you are D? It would be so complex as the criteria is “ problematic” ????
Contagious,
Just realised I didn’t answer the second part of your comment.
I think legally rather than classifying narcissists, it might be possible to introduce additional behaviour based terms to describe the abuse.
So coercive control is a good example. If more coercive control cases were brought and more convictions occurred then understanding of what coercive control means would increase. This might aid prevention in the first place (more victims understand what is happening sooner so GOSO) and lawyers become more skilled at proving that coercive control took place. This appears not to be the case here currently.
https://www.theguardian.com/football/2023/jul/18/ryan-giggs-domestic-abuse-trial-was-case-without-winners
Perhaps there are other behaviour based legal terms that could be created based on narcissistic behaviours. Smearing might be a good one, is smearing a crime? You have defamation of character which usually revolves around financial damage ( I think) but what of the psychological damage to the victim? What if there is no financial damage but the victim is smeared over a prolonged period impacting social, family, work relationships? Does that fall under defamation? Don’t know, but you probably see where I’m going with it. Rather than focus on classification, focus on behaviours and make more of them punishable by law.
I’m sure it’s not that simple.
Xx
Dear Mr Tudor,
World Mental Health Summit comment from TOW……..
‘if someone is looking for something please don’t feed them the thing they’re not looking for that’s going to harm them’ 🥗😳
🤣
Dear Mr Tudor,
Taylor Swift (nearly 34 years) and Brittany Mahomes (28 years)… already a secret handshake in such a short time of knowing each other …..seriously ? 😂 Isn’t that juvenile behaviour just for kids and/or a parent thing ?
Good grief, narcs will do literally anything, so pathetic ! 🤦♀️
1) Have you seen “Phantom Thread?”
2) If so, is Daniel Day Lewis’s character a pretty good portrait of a greater narcissist?
Thank you.
1. No.
2. N/A
Do you author books with content similar to the Dark Cupid series?
No.
Darn. Haha
Thank you, and good to see you back
Hi Mr. Tudor,
Everyone that may read this comment, I want you to know how valuable the knowledge Mr. Tudor shares truly is. I encountered his blog some years ago now.
Mr. Tudor, I would like to tell you quickly what I have learned in part from you, but most of all from myself. Things came to a head for me. I found myself angry and sobbing. Why had my father hurt me? Why had my mother let him? Why didn’t my husband love me? Why wasn’t I loveable? Then it hit me. They each were operating from a distorted perspective, created for self preservation as a result of trauma inflicted during their development. It had nothing to do with me really. However, I was damaged from their abuse resulting in a very broken person who didn’t cope with life well. The trauma had distorted my perspective as well. I only knew how to live in the victim role. I hid behind that. I had built my own illusion. I couldn’t cope with things. I was abused so not my fault. I hadn’t left my abuser because then I would have to face myself. I had feared standing on my own because if I failed it meant I was worthless. So I hid behind my victimhood as the excuse. Once I saw all these things I saw the humanity in my abusers and the humanity in myself. I came down off that cross. I felt the weight lift off of me. I was no longer hurting, or scared, or hating myself. I love who I am today. Mr. Tudor. Thank my friend. It took time for the things you speak of here to reach me, but it did. I said it before, and I’ll say it again. Weather it’s your intent or not, you are an angel to many. I know you are to me. Thank you.
Dear Mr Tudor,
There’s a lot more to farmers than ‘this one’ gives them credit for! ‘Social media’ is very low on their priority list, they’re way too busy making a living, which requires more than one hour per week you imbecile ….. he’s such an ignoramus!
How many cliff fight backs equate to an empathic supernova?
They do not.
Mr. Tudor–
1. In your relationships, have you observed there to be a number of cliff fightbacks in the days/weeks before a supernova?
2. Are there signs that you will get a supernova that prompt you to keep pushing the buttons to get that?
3. If yes to 2, do the signs vary based on the cadre/special traits of the empath you’re involved with?
Thank you so much for your time. Much appreciated.
1. No.
2. The fact of them being a super means that an empathic supernova is a possibility.
Thank you so much, sir!
H G Tudor refers to the doctors as good.
He describes empaths as being decent.
He says the majority of the population are normals.
There is a narcissist category (no empathy & sense of entitlement), a narcissistic one (not narcissists), a normal one and empaths.
This infers that it is normal to be empathic (but not an empath, a narcissist or narcissistic).
I say this because there is no standalone normal category (free of narcissistic and/or empathic qualities).
i.e. there is no ’empathic-but-not-an-empath’ category.
If the majority of the population are good, how are narcissists able to run amok? Or are narcissists rare and empaths more likely to be stung/affected by narcissists?
If the majority of the population are good and empathic, why aren’t empaths protected?
I don’t understand.
Name wrote
“i.e. there is no ’empathic-but-not-an-empath’ category.”
There is no individual with Only empathy,
but there are individuals with Only narcissism (narcissists).
I think what you are looking for is “normals leaning more empathic”
Dear Mr Tudor,
Jada Pinkett Smith announced she and Will are still married but separated 7 years ago and now Meryl Streep just announced she’s still married and separated 6 years ago.
I understand reasons for staying married may include tax, insurance purposes or possibly an expensive divorce, however, legally, you’re still married and if you have sex outside the marriage, it’s still classed as adultery (unless you have a decree absolute of course)……not that anyone really cares about that these days.
Would this be considered to be a narcissistic trait or from a narcissistic person because these people have been lying and deceiving others by portraying a life of marital bliss and harmony?
Just curious from your perspective! Ta-muchly
Hi Bubbles! For me, if separated, it’s not adultery because it’s not lying. It’s agreed. It’s weird as religious wise it might be but then again even if married and thinking of affairs are considered adultery in some religions. The main reason to stay married and not divorce is usually when there’s no conflict and why divide the money. Although I knew a woman married for 61 years and stayed married as Catholic although they lead separate lives. She didn’t see others. He did but supported the family financially. Maybe someone stays out of fear of leaving. Abandonment was accepted by the church for divorce. Abuse too. So if there are grounds for divorce religious wise but the person stays married, is it adultery if the person finds solace in another. Ultimately I am not God, so I don’t know but I can see where empaths would “ stray” and it might be justified and not make them a narc. I doubt Meryl is but I am not HG!
Dear Contagious,
I must confess, I was being a tad ‘technical’ haha.
I knew a lady in the same position as your friend, she didn’t want shame brought on her family as she was old school Italian. Some people fear being alone or they just stay because it’s more convenient. Sadly, these days there’s a shortage of rentals!
I remember back in the ‘good ol days’, when it was scandalous if you were married and entered into an extra marital affair. Most suspecting partners hired a private detective to prove their infidelity in a court of law, as it was very complicated to obtain a divorce back then. You were both named n shamed in the paper for all to see and subsequently it was the first page everyone rushed to read for all the gossip haha How humiliating and embarrassing! The woman was generally considered the ‘home wrecker’ and was labelled a hussy or a harlot, cos it was obviously all HER fault and was seen as damaged goods and any decent man wouldn’t touch her with a 10’ pole. The man usually got off fairly scot free because SHE obviously lured and enticed him with her low values and morals. The man would end up happily back with his wife. Good eh ?
I’ve always liked Meryl Streep, she appears empathic, but what do I know ? haha
Dear Mr Tudor,
It’s so ironic, Harry writes a book on mental health, Jada writes one on healthy relationships and cough…entanglements (should be titled ‘Worthless’, not Worthy) haha and Amber is reported to be working on one about domestic violence and abuse.
I wonder what ‘this one’s’ wife will name hers……’My True Life as a Royal Princess and the Duchess of Sussex’ ? 🤣
Does a narcissist draw fuel from another person’s natural emotional expression, eg when they’re complaining about problems at work or sharing their relationship troubles, even if it’s not a reaction to the narcissist, simply because it happens in their presence?
If the emotional reaction is caused by something else, this is not fuel for the narcissist, hence why you talking about your problems to a narcissist is boring, it provides us with nothing.
If you ask us our view about your problems, now you are giving us fuel because you are involving us.
HG as a master seducer and manipulator what do you think to Robert Greene’s work? Especially Art of Seduction.
I have not read it, it is superfluous for me to do so.
What do you think of
MMR A False Angel men?
I find them absolutely disgusting. More odious than MMR A FA women.
Odious.
Why is the individual formerly known as Harry’s Wife referred to now as This One’s Wife?
She referred to Harry as This One, therefore she becomes This One´s Wife.
HG,
I’d be really interested to learn more about the dynamic between a narc who is codependent on another narc. Why do they become codependent to another narc?
Thinking of some examples, Fred and rose west, guislane maxwell, the Clinton’s the Blair’s etc
Thank you very much
That is not codependency, it is a different dynamic between two narcissists.
Dear HG,
That’s how two narcs coexist off each other, you called it, cementation, if I’m correct? Xx
Speaking of which I watched a Spanish series on Netflix Sahgradia family and it starts in an art class and shows a clay figure that was over 20,000 years ago … Venus of Willendorf , paleolithic times, mothers were important, they not only fed their children they protected and nourished to preserve the survival of people at their peril, in China 4000 years ago a skeleton mother protected child against a tremor that survives today. These and many demonstrate a theory that a bond between the mother and child was a primary cause that exists in society today. Love of our mother made us empathetic people today. We needed to stop being nomads and this love caused us to evolve today. Without a mother, we would not be here breathing today. … so I thought why are there so few narcissists? Perhaps it’s the aberrant few mothers who had no empathy who did not evolve who remained nomads and failed to love their child for whatever reason. And they created narcissists. Ok others can too but smaller as most have a “mother” at birth since men don’t give birth. Considering a narc is developed at 0-9. It makes sense. This means most mothers love as normals or empaths which is why the world is more full of them. So if fewer mothers loved our society would look much different.
Thank you for asking this question, Can’t remember. I was curious about that myself.
Why do narcissists prefer empathic victims vs narcissistic victims? How does the quality of the fuel differ? How do they differ in the bedroom?
Easier to ensnare and keep ensnared.
Read Fuel.
Read Sex and the Narcissist.
HG,
1. Do you and any IPPS of yours ever have JFK Jr/Carolyn Bessette vibes or looks?
2. Do only blue eyed blondes make IPPS status?
3. Do you only pick women who don’t want pets (cats, dogs, whatever)?
4. Do you have Halloween plans, or is frightening the masses just another Tuesday?
5. Is/was your mother blonde and blue eyed? Thank you.
1. No.
2. No.
3. No.
4. Not specific to Halloween, that is for children.
5. Yes.
Frightening children is every Tuesday, got it. 😜
Re 4, any special videos for us?
Do you like BBQ or Shepard? Or shepardess? Nandos? Sony? Etc…
I do not understand what you are referring to.
It was to a geographic location:) welcome back HG! Your absence caused me to devour your YouTube!