The March of the Lovefrauds


You died the moment you met me.

My kind are engaged in wholesale slaughter. A daily massacre. Nobody is stopping us either.

These massacres are not literal deaths. No, they way I leave you I believe that you may actually prefer to be dead in order to end the pain. The unrelenting pain and misery that I will inflict on you. What I kill is your confidence, your self-esteem and your sense of worth. I annihilate your finances, obliterate your friendships, shred your sanity and drive an icy cold dagger through your very being. You see, people like you pride yourselves on being honest, decent and understanding. That’s what makes you so attractive to me. That’s what makes the killing all the more complete.

You may think that I am an awful human being and that I revel in the consequences of my behaviour. For some of my kind that is right and for others it is not. Some of my kind have no awareness of what they are and believe that what they do just has to be done. Others of my kind know exactly what we do. I am not concerned about how you feel. I have no interest in your reaction to what I do. All I am focussed on is what your emotional reaction does for me.

People are stupid. They need everything to be labelled, to be categorised and pigeonholed. They need great big flashing neon signs telling them what people are as they are too idiotic or lazy to try and work it out for themselves. See the man in a dirty raincoat with unkempt hair that hangs around the children’s playground? He is a child molester. Look over there at the man with a striped shirt and a bag with the word ‘Swag’ on it. He is a burglar. What about the lady in dirty, piss-stained clothes, mumbling to herself and trying to feed the pigeons stones? Oh she is a madwoman. That is what people expect to see. Ask anybody to draw a picture of a murderer and ninety-nine times out of a hundred, they will draw a crazed looking man, dressed in black, carrying a knife or a gun. They won’t sketch their spouse or their relative. Ask a person where they will most find a rapist and they will answer that he will be lurking behind a bush near the subway ready to leap out on some stranger. What they won’t do is point at their boyfriend sat next to them watching television.

And that is where the problem lies. You expect to be able to recognise those that will cause you harm in such an obvious manner. It isn’t like that. There is a reason that those dangerous people are able to hurt in the way that they do. It is because they are all around you. They are sat next to you in your car. They stand with you at the water cooler or in the lift. They talk to you at the school gates or serve you your daily coffee. They permeate society. That is what makes them so effective. The ability to blend in and hide in plain sight. How many times have you heard the neighbour interviewed about the horrific murder of a family by the father, say,

“He always seemed so friendly and happy.”


“He kept himself to himself.”


“He was a quiet man. I never thought he had it in him.”

Or my favourite.

“You don’t expect these things to happen here do you? You always think it couldn’t happen here.”

These people appear as innocuous as they are so ordinary and fit with their surroundings. They have masked what lurks beneath. These people, the drug dealers, the killers and the abusers were ordinary. They were themselves and they made no attempt to hide or be different.

This is what makes me so dangerous. I make a conscious attempt to blend in with those around me. I am a shape shifter. I take on the characteristics of my victims, mirroring what they love and enjoy. I become what you want me to be. You have always wanted to meet the successful business owner. I am he. How about the well-read bookish fellow who enjoys the theatre and some amateur dramatics? I can be him as well. You just love people who have travelled extensively? Let me tell you all about my yearlong world tour. Rock nut? Done. Singer? Do re me fah so lah ti do. Family man? No problem. I will morph and twist into these ideal people and in so doing I will slide my tendrils around you with insidious ease and pull you into the full horror of my world.

You are not able to see me coming. I hide behind a thousand masks. The bad people I have described above make no real effort to inveigle their way into your world. They are already there. They are part of your day-to-day life and you are unlucky that you just happened to be near them when they struck. I am completely different. I have come after you. I have marked you out as my prey and circled you, preparing to strike. I engage in subterfuge to further my aims and to enable me to glide in and out of people’s lives with slippery ease. I suddenly appear. Oh, there may be some existing connection admittedly, but that is all part of the preparation. When I actually enter your life I do so in a blaze of deliciously disorientating glory that has you rooted to the spot and gagging for more, such is the addictive nature of my behaviour.

All my work is done before I engage you. That is why your execution takes place the moment we meet. All else that follows is merely your elongated death throes and believe me, do I like to drag them out for the maximum of effect. I even pretend to try and resuscitate you from time to time. That’s just a ruse to enable me to suck more of the life from you. You may regard that as twisted. I don’t care. So long as I am able to feed, that is all that I care about. I must feed. Each and every moment to try and satiate this insatiable hunger that rages inside me. I think that the hunger can be sated but somehow, it never seems to be the case.

Thus my killing goes on and on and on. Victim after victim piling up and the beauty of it all is that I merely slip on another mask and melt away to find another unfortunate. I walk away leaving chaos and destruction in my wake but I never look over my shoulder.

Should you fear me? Absolutely. Sadly, for you, you don’t know what to look for because I do not come into your life bearing a warning. Once I have emotionally slain you, only then might you recognise the danger a second time but of course, by that point the damage is done. Amazingly, some of you come back for more. Incredible isn’t it? Sometimes it is with me or sometimes with another of my kind. The effect is the same however. Another excruciating death.

The beauty of all of this is that nobody can touch me. Those who might try to bring the sanction of criminal penalties against me usually fail. They either won’t do it because they still love me or that somehow they think they can save me and they would rather do that. There are others who are so broken they blame themselves and not me. Others again are so utterly destroyed they do not have the strength to take action. The very few that do not fall at these hurdles soon realise that my innate charm, my myriad of lies and irresistible powers of persuasion mean that actually getting the criminal law to apply to me is nigh on impossible. It is only right. The rules are not meant for me.

All of this means that next to nobody recognises my kind when we first choose you. Why would you? We bear no mark or label. We do not appear as some stereotype. We do not look like abusers but then what do abusers look like? They look like me. Him. Her. That man sat across from you on the train in his suit reading a quality broadsheet. The headmistress who crochets around the clock and is a committed Christian. The abuser looks like the construction worker downing his gallon of beer before weaving his way home. He looks like the quiet neighbour. The shy teenager. The earnest music teacher. The gregarious uncle. Him. Her. Them. You do not see us coming. You had no chance. Society repeatedly fails to identify what we are and how we operate. It downplays what we do with a host of euphemisms and woolly descriptions because people cannot accept that somebody who is so pleasant to them can then be so horrible too. Yet, that is precisely how we operate. Would you trust someone who punched you in the face when they first met you? Of course not. You’d trust him after three years of marriage before the first blow landed though wouldn’t you? You would not trust the fraudster if he stole ten thousand pounds on his first day at work, but after five years of solid and loyal service you would not think twice that he was forging signatures and diverting funds to his personal bank account. Society and people are too ready to apply labels which diminish the impact of what we do and what we are. You can attest to the horrendous damage that we do, you know better than anybody else of the impact that we have and yet you have to listen to people talking about how he is “misunderstood”, “under pressure”, “not normally like that”, “must have been provoked”. These well-intentioned people cause considerable damage as the ignorant apologists for the carnage we unleash.

Now you know what we are, you can identify us with ease. You can now think back to all the people you have interacted with and now you see us as if we have been daubed in bright red paint. Your colleague at work. The “difficult” customer. Your mother. Your brother. That friend who upset you one week and then fawned over you the next. The lovers. The celebrities. The politicians. More and more of us are identified by you and yet still we are able to do what we want and move on to the next unsuspecting victim. Society does not identify us. Society does not understand what we are. Society is utterly ineffective in tackling us. Our numbers are growing and our devastating impact on the lives of all those we entangle (and it is never just the one person is it) grows but what is being done? Do the politicians know us (save when they look in the mirror)? Do the police officers understand what we are? The nurses? The social workers? The judges? The court appointed psychiatrist? The jury? The neighbours? The teachers? The local government officials? All those who might be able to do something to address what we are rarely know what we are leading to greater frustration for you and the continued advancement of our agendas.

Nobody is stopping us.

What are you going to do about it?


112 thoughts on “The March of the Lovefrauds

  1. Susan says:

    I have to agree most people are “stupid” (although I think the word should be ignorant) based on the context of what HG was saying. I see it everyday. He is basically saying, Look around you, don’t be lazy and open your eyes, don’t base people on just what society labels them as. Most people live with their heads in the sand only seeing what they want in order to keep reality obscured and by keeping people in neat categorized boxes they don’t have to face the truth. And because of this, you are leaving yourself vulnerable to attacks from his kind. The bible is full of scripture telling us to “Guard our hearts” “Guard ourselves” 1 Peter 5:8:
    Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.
    proverbs 4:23:
    Above all else, guard your heart,
    for everything you do flows from it.
    There are many! It isn’t easy though, Our nature is to GIVE and theirs is to TAKE.
    the last sentence,
    “What are you going to do about it?”

    1. NP says:

      yep…hit it right on the nail.

      There are many scriptures that warn us against Narcs, and then there;s the verse on Love – in Corinthians. The terrible thing is…Narcs claim to love from the word go and back up their words with actions, but then they change midway. Maybe our understanding of love is a bit warped – and we get confused as the Narc intends it, coz love is not what the Narc does:

      ‘Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.’

      Unfortunately, the Narc demands that the empath trusts, hopes, perseveres while he or she in impatient, unkind, envious, boastful, easily angered, keeping records of wrongs, self-seeking, delighting in evil, rejoicing in lies, does not protect, does not trust, never hopeful and persevering.

      It is unfortunate, but the Bible says such kind of people belong in hell. I thank God for creating hell. People often say that a loving God would not banish people to hell, and at times it gets confusing, but in understanding Narcissism, I totally get why God has to banish a given category of people to hell. No other way other that to hell direct, and I dearly do thank God for that.

      ‘Vengeance is mine, sayeth the Lord of Hosts. Leave vengeance to me, I shall avenge.’

      ‘Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul in hell.’

      It’s time to fear God and not Narcs.

      My salvation is prayer…and seeking God’s protection and wisdom coz otherwise, there’s no protection from the Ahab’s and Jezebel’s of our time. There is no protection at all.

  2. Bette says:

    “We have to forgive ourselves let go of the shame
    live life on purpose.” Well said . Entertainment.

    “Our profound emotions and seeming inability to fully
    accept that a human being can truly be empathy-free
    makes us stupid.” Absolutely, High Octane

    In fact, I think that Narcs and Psychopaths that intrude
    upon our lives have much to teach us.

    Such as:
    Always be careful who you trust.
    Never let yourself become isolated if you can help it.
    Always put on a game face to people you don’t know well

    I’m sure there are many others… “Normals” don’t put
    up with shit, don’t let themselves get isolated and know
    better than to get hysterical to the Narcs friends. They
    have their own friends to run to, that they have still firmly
    in their own corner. They are willing to listen to their
    inner doubts and suspicions, where we Empaths are
    almost always stuck in empathy mode. Not healthy.

  3. High Octane Fuel says:

    Both empaths and narcissists are stupid in different ways. Narcissists are, without a doubt, emotionally stupid in their inability to empathize and understand how and why people respond emotionally in the way they do. Yes, they study and mimic to get by but it only gets them so far. Those moments when they are trying to “get it right” with their faux empathetic responses and we witness a bizarre and totally “off” behavioral reaction just illustrates this emotional stupidity. And then there are those infamous childish tantrums when they don’t get their way – completely emotionally stupid for a fully cognitively developed adult human being.

    Empaths are stupid too, yes, because we see the evidence that we should leave, even repeated evidence which is glaringly obvious, but we often stay, believing their ridiculous lies and hoping against hope. We can even know precisely what you are, precisely how you are manipulating us, and know that it has nothing to do with us, yet still get deeply hurt. Our profound emotions and seeming inability to fully accept that a human being can truly be empathy-free makes us stupid.

    Perhaps the “normals,” in the middle of the spectrum, are less stupid (in both emotion & logic) than those of us at the extreme ends?

  4. J says:

    HG it seems you’re taking a internet beating by calling us stupid. Unfortunately, I think you’re right. I think we are stupid. There’s always red flags. We choose to ignore them, making excuses instead. Everyone is screwed up in some way or another, so it makes letting these red flags slip all the easier. It just all seems so sad to me. The very empathetic people are usually that way because they suffered great pain in childhood. The personality disordered are that way for the same reasons. Seems illogical to torture the tortured, but we’re the easiest targets to take everything out on. So, I guess in the end it does make sense. Survival of the fittest.
    Thank you for your writings. It is a great help and I prefer the brutal honesty over the fluffy bs crap.

    1. I agree about preferring the “honesty over the fluffy bs”.

    2. Entertainment says:

      Illogical to torture the tortured. Great many dark tortured souls. Misplaced anger makes a person sick and stuck in the dark. We claim victory, but continue wallowing in the dark. HG, isn’t the only one who fears facing inner issues and is comfortable with protecting the inner child. We have to forgive ourselves let go of the shame live life on purpose.

  5. Projection…when you say “people are stupid”. You are projecting what you think about yourself. It’s nothing personal, H.G., but projection is what your kind just happens to do. It’s all part of the …game. I will not insult your intelligence by telling you that you are mistaken by calling yourself, “stupid”.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Here’s the thing, I am far from stupid. My academic qualifications alone demonstrate this.

      1. Rhyme Time Poetry says:

        Here’s the thing, H.G., we [whom you call stupid] are far from stupid. [Incidentally, “academic qualifications” are just one category of many others that demonstrate a person’s intelligence. At any rate, I did not call you “stupid”. What I did say, however, is that you were Projecting, which all Narcissists do. In your projection, it was, you, who said you were stupid. I neither agree, or disagree, with you calling yourself stupid because, quite frankly, I do not really know you.

      2. Love says:

        You are brilliant Mr. Tudor!

        1. 🦋 says:

          Okay, now I see why you think we’re stupid, Mr. Tudor…

        2. 🦋 says:

          Yes, Love….I already know you adore H.G., and pretty much worship the ground he walks on. I think you, Love, would make a splendid Primary Source for a Sociopath, such as Mr. Tudor. You do seem the perfect candidate for the job. All sugar, and no spice, though.

      3. Love says:

        C-Money, I’m more like aspartame, artificial sugar. A sweet poison.

  6. Debbie says:

    “My kind are engaged in wholesale slaughter. A daily massacre. Nobody is stopping us either.”
    ….. until now..
    You HG.
    Actually you are stopping it by providing the tools so to speak.
    By informing us.
    And now it is up to us to act on the information.

    Its like learning a skillful and tidy emergency stop from a driving instructor.
    It is now up to us to put our foot on the brake by following this instruction.

    ‘We’ have to accelerate off after that obviously, slinging the L plates and the narcissist to the four winds.

  7. Victory says:

    I thought you’d be taking pride in knowing your teachings are working. Oh well, enjoy your day.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Oh indeed I am Victory, I meant my first comment was not intended to be regarded as condescending towards you, so that is why I wrote “not at all”. I wasn’t suggesting that your chainsaw wasn’t working! We were at cross purposes. I am pleased they are taking effect for you.

    2. Kit says:

      Don’t forget “Talk is cheap.”

  8. It might seem that no one here on earth can stop Narcissists, or Sociopaths, but when the time comes, and Jesus returns, these kind will wish to hide somewhere, and beg for the mountains to cover them, and for the caves to shelter them, because The Lord is Just, and He will have His Day. Not believing this is so does not lessen its truth.

    1. NarcAngel says:

      I wished for that when I was being abused as a child and yet the coward apparition you refer to as Jesus or God did not appear. They offer but fools gold to those too weak to believe in themselves here on Earth. Convenient that no one can report back a bigger illusion than any Narc has ever pulled off.

      Also-they promise salvation to anyone who asks so I will continue carnage on Earth and then just cry out for them upon my deathbed. I’ll be the one sitting to your left in “Heaven”. See you there. Not.

      1. Flickatina says:

        NA – First of all – much lols for the Ridiculous Symbols……proper made me laugh!

        Second – well bloody said! As an atheist/anti-theist, the talk of god/JC infuriates me. There is no god. If there was a god then he would have much to answer for and I would welcome the chance to make him answer.

        1. 🦋 says:

          You can laugh at the symbols all you wish… F L I C K a tina 😀😃😄😁😆

          1. Flickatina says:

            It’s not the symbols I was laughing at. It was the way you were referred to that made me laugh. I think your symbols are great!

        2. 🦋 says:

          F L I C K, I think one of your comments stated on H.G. Tudor’s post, “Adored”, that we can adore anyone we wish. We do not need anyone else’s approval to do so… This happens to be true. And, I do Adore The Lord. I bow down to Him, alone. You can all bow down to H.G. if you do so choose, but I bow down to Jesus Christ. I do not need your approval to do so. And, you do not need my approval to worship H.G.

          1. Flickatina says:

            And you are absolutely correct! And I am free to be a non-believer.
            Freedom rocks.

          2. Flickatina says:

            And I do not worship HG!!

      2. I also was abused as a child, but I still believe wholeheartedly in Jesus Christ. Every time I have cried out to Him, he has given me the strength to persevere, and find joy, and peace. I trust in Him. I am stronger for the abuse I have been through. He comforts me day and night, as long as I do not shut Him out.

        1. NarcAngel says:

          Well Im glad Jesus Christ was able to make you stronger by standing back to watch while you were abused. Stand up guy-not to mention sadistic voyeur. He must have been using the same GPS as his friends Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, and The Tooth Fairy cause they couldnt find me either. Its almost like…….wait…..Holy Shit!! (Christs nickname here in the hood)….theyre the same entity!!!!!

      3. 🦋 says:

        Of course, it is your prerogative to believe what you wish, and visa versa. It is also H.G.’s prerogative to believe as he does. And, I will not cause either of you “Ridiculous” for choosing your own beliefs.

    2. Love says:

      I want to solve the symbols!
      2 a pear ant.
      Too apparent?

      1. NarcAngel says:

        Trains pear ant c

      2. Love says:

        You are a genius NarcAngel! I thought the C was the first letter of her name…. We all know and love the Transparency symbol who was formerly a lot of other names.

      3. 💜💜💜 says:

        Do you adore all Narcissists, Love, or just the Malignant ones?

      4. Love says:

        Just Mr. Tudor, Claudia. What about you?

        1. 💜💜💜 says:

          I do not adore ANY Malignant Narcissists.

    3. Bloody Elemental says:

      God is one of us, sweetheart.

  9. alexis2015s says:

    I’m going to continue to use the knowledge to enlighten, help and speed the recovery process up for others.

    As for me……..I can’t make promises that I won’t continue to play a very dangerous game of causing NI…….once in a while.

    1. Kit says:


      1. alexis2015s says:

        Narcissistic injury. It’s when you hurt a narcs feelings 🙂

  10. Love this post. xoxo

  11. “I become what you want me to be.”
    Although i already knew this frm previous articles by you, it is still alarming to read. I shuddered when i read it.

    1. Love says:

      PTSD, thank you for pointing out this line. The truth is, I do the same. I become what my narcs want me to be. No, I don’t mirror them but I also put on a facade. The facade which best serves their needs.

      1. Love, that’s an interesting point. In fact, come to think of it, i guess everybody does it to a certain degree in order to please others.

  12. J.R. says:

    You know what else HG? Everyday you avail yourself to us. Irregardless of your motives & anonymity, you lay bare your life for us. You are brutal, educational, honest, vulnerable, witty, likeable, intelligent, just to name a few but most importantly worthy.
    In return we get to learn, heal, vent, project, process, grow & you let us.

    Even though we are not your friends per Se, do you know what John 15:13 says?

    ‘Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.’

    You do that for us. Everyday. Thankyou.

    1. Entertainment says:

      Interesting, I am the first to speak on how HG have help me to understand npd, also provide me with closure.

      However, I don’t think that scripture applies to what HG is doing.

  13. J.R. says:

    Ashley is right. This is your time. Education brings change & people need to care about a subject to embrace it. We have one of you kind now as leader of the free world. Personally, I am emailing media here in Australia linking with your site though I’m sure you don’t need the help. Your information has the potential to influence everything from domestic violence to politics.
    Articles like this one & the online predatory ones especially should be mandatory learning in schools. We have enough celebrated & celebratised narcissists here, many for the wrong reasons, to have the media to take note. Once people start to see & understand how this insidious horror inflicts society at so many levels they will respond.
    But right back to the most basic fact behind it all is that healthy adults come from healthy homes & childhoods & who doesn’t care about that. It starts there. WE are responsible.
    Your upcoming book on POTUS will be your juggernaut. It will be a privilege to watch.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you JR, I appreciate you doing that. It isnt a book on POTUS (not yet anyway) but rather an article to set the tone if you will.

      1. J.R. says:

        Thankyou for the clarification.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          You are welcome.

      2. Victory says:

        I can tell by the condescending tone of your response I’ve struck some pillars. Thanks for the practice. My empaths Chainsaw of Resilence is working.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Not at all.

  14. Victory says:

    Oh HG, “people are stupid.” Through all of your writing and teachings I never expected such an unintelligent, generalized statement. We (the empaths) are intelligent, resilient, trusting & kind beings. Our positive view of the world may make us naive to your lies, manipulations and childish games. That is not stupidity. It takes great strength to stand before the world with our hearts on our sleeves, exposed and willing to give. Through these readings I am definitely coming to know who the superior being are. It is certainly not the ones so afraid to be seen they use, manipulate and hurt others without remorse. I have enjoyed your writings but this shows a intellectual deficit that highly disappoints me. I may have to seek a new Narcissist to guide me from here.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Good luck with that.

      1. Kit says:

        What about Sam Vaknin? Now those two in a room together would make an interesting show!

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Who’s he?

      2. Kit says:

        Can’t respond below, Sam Vaknin is another well-known narc who writes about this shite. HE has a Wikipedia page!

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I know who he is, I was being playful.

      3. Kit says:

        Oh I guess my reply to your reply goes below your reply. Got that? 🙂

    2. Kit says:

      Interesting what you wrote “It takes great strength to stand before the world with our hearts on our sleeves, exposed and willing to give.”

      My narc said something similar to me when I told him I thought my kindness was a weakness. He said it took incredible strength, especially in a world where people try to knock you down. (That last bit was a bit ironic, eh?). Now of course, he could have been lying about that too. 🙂

    3. Rebecca Bronson says:

      HG has schooled me on the essence, velocity, trajectory, and impact of his kind. I do not argue nor try to make them anything other than what he/they are.

  15. ashley says:

    What am I going to do about it?
    -Let you shine your light; watch you bask in the light of the world.
    -Learn from you: the unrivalled master and only complete source of wisdom alive who can (and will) unveil what lies beneath the mask which you and your kind wear.
    -Accept you (and only you amongst your kind, HG) for all that you are – good and bad – because you stand ALONE as also being: entirely honest and therefore empowering, and entirely deserving of what you desire.
    -Respect and admire the many aspects in you, which set you apart from the rest of ‘your kind’ (they’re all hiding…) and watch you single handedly defy the DSM bullshit you’ve been pigeonholed into by any “good doctor”. They are wearing white coats, hanging their fancy PhD’s, taking notes with pad & paper as you speak, and yet they still manage to miss so much… resulting in an entirely inadequate ‘label’ of you.
    -Maintain awareness of your real ability to change the entire world and its perception of truth and reality, as it is changing quickly and dramatically.
    -Understand that this is YOUR TIME. YOU WILL change the world, because you were created to do so. Your time is NOW; you know this.
    -Step aside and let you win this war, swiftly and singlehandedly.
    -Applaud you.

  16. High Octane Fuel says:

    So I guess you are proud that you can get away with this emotional destruction undetected. Lovely. Well, my solace is that I know that each and every day you wake up as hungry, desperate addicts looking for a fix. Your entire lives. Always having to scheme and search all day and night. You can never just relax. Your punishment for profoundly hurting me in the ways you did is that you’re doomed to that pathetic desperate existence for an eternity. Makes me feel good in my low moments. Thank god I don’t have to live that way ever. Thank god I wake up every morning and genuinely like who I am. Not only do I like who I am, but I also know *who* I am. I am known intimately by others who recognize my profound and authentic goodness. And I don’t have to simulate any of it. It’s pure grade. I will continue to avoid your kind now that I know what to watch out for. I will continue to spread the word about how you work and who you are. I will continue to take delight in ignoring you completely knowing it’s the best revenge. And I will not try to save you. An utter waste of my precious resources. Enjoy reveling in your own darkness – it’s all yours. I will continue to dance in my own light.

    1. Kat Huff says:

      Very well said! 🙂

  17. mitzi says:

    I am his next victim.

    1. Love says:

      Oooh Mitzi! I like the foreshadowing. Creates a suspenseful buildup!

  18. Karin says:

    “What are you going to do about it?”

    Step 1: Heal
    Step 2: Dismantle all internal defenses
    Step 3: Identify the part within that is indestructible
    Step 4: Develop strong and healthy boundaries
    Step 5: Choose or choose not to engage
    Step 6: If engaging, uphold boundaries and shine the light

    The light is indestructible. The light can light other lights. The light destroys armor.

  19. Ollie says:

    I’m going to keep walking… i’ve stopped a few times, tried loving them till I could give no more and it didn’t stop them one bit from doing what they were doing … no more for me…

  20. Laurie says:

    Well, first off, you are definitely not getting taken out to dinner for your birthday this year.

  21. Rebecca Bronson says:

    Hi HG- WOW! This one packed a punch- Certainly there must be at least one or perhaps more family members, especially mothers/fathers, who know to some degree the depth of the depravity of your kind. I’m curious about the family dynamics that enable this violence. Do parents/siblings generally “know”? And if so, do they ever attempt to help or warn the victims? Thanks!

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Often they do not for two reasons :-

      1. The maintenance of the facade which family members are usually part of;
      2. If the family have seen some aberrant behaviours they do not recognise it as narcissism but rather put it down to something else or euphemise it, thus it remains undetected and not addressed.

      Keep in mind the victim is usually smeared as well so that the family think the victim is crazy/an addict/the abuser and therefore they rally around the “poor narc victim”.
      Of course there are exceptions but they are in the minority.

      1. Snow White says:

        Hi HG,
        How would your sister describe you as you were growing up and what does she think of you now?
        Does Matrinarc think there is anything wrong with her? I know your kind don’t but does she have some awareness as to what she is?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Brilliant and difficult.
          She has no idea.

      2. Flickatina says:

        What if your victim’s family is very close and they probably would not believe you?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          We will have brought them around to our way of thinking during the golden period or if someone has been resistant to “falling in line” they would be isolated.

  22. I can write intellectually like others on here but I just want to get on with my question. You said “What are you going to do about it?”. What does a 5 ft tall woman do about a celebrity type Christian singer that has a huge following of people, mostly women, who feel like I used to about him until he damaged me? Isn’t there more that I can do than stop going to concerts? At this past Christmas concert, he had changed and I felt something was wrong after seeing him two months before. At the preceding concert where I was sitting on the front row, he turned to me from the stage and sang a song ” I Just Call You Mine.” Jealousy hit the fan big time. No videos are allowed in his concert but someone did video it and sent to me with comments anonymously. I’m not visible in the video but he is staring at me and even touched himself at one point. When I told him about it, he denied looking at me. I think he might have already smeared me before I saw him at Christmas and that is why I sensed a change in him and in some fans I thought were friends. I know exactly when he snared me by the stare last May, 2016 when he was available to meet fans after the concert. A friend that was with me but on the sidelines took photos and I have the stare photo. I felt so weak I could barely stand up and was severely affected sexually but nothing has happened. We live in different states. After I saw him last, I know he is a liar and feel repulsed by him. He is my favorite singer and I can’t listen to him again. I have been thinking about it all and wouldn’t be surprised he is a Narcissist. He ministers along with his concerts and is widely known for his tenor abilities. Do you think he will bother me? Almost all of my friends on Facebook are through his music. He is married with four children and the youngest is 13. No one has ever affected me like he did. Sorry to go on so long. Thank you, H.G. and I’m glad I found your blog.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Have you had any interaction with this man other than attending his concerts?

      1. NarcAngel says:

        That made me laugh out loud!
        A fan

    2. NarcAngel says:

      I see that by intellectually you dont mean longer posts lol.

  23. I’m going to check myself before I wreck myself.

    1. Love says:

      I ❤ Ice Cube. I wish he would stop making family movies. 😝

  24. Sunshine says:

    Speaking of ‘love frauds’, do you have anything or will you be producing anything about narcissists and infidelity?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      There are blog articles which cover that topic Sunshine.

      1. Kit says:

        Don’t be lazy, that’s not your style. Link us up.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Don’t be lazy, use the search function, I have plenty to do.

    2. Sunshine says:

      Ok, time to use the site search function. Thank you.

      Ps, why are so many of my comments not being published? I’ve even seen some disappear, I’m sure. I’m hardly controversial!

      1. HG Tudor says:

        None of your comments have disappeared, they will be in moderation.

      2. Sunshine says:


      3. Sunshine says:

        How many people moderate this site?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          One. Me.

  25. Maria says:

    Demons on the rampage with free rains.
    But i want to hang on to the belief that the angels will win over them one day.
    It would be only right..

  26. Mona says:

    You will stumble over your feet some day. Most of your kind do, not all. You really beg for punishment. Invite all of us (all of the blog) to your house and we will love you to death.

    1. Flickatina says:

      Interesting therapy! Put a narc in a house with a bunch of empaths who will just love….safety in numbers for us and enforced love, adoration and validation for the narc.

      1. Sunshine says:

        This is just Plan B for entering the Tudor compound, isn’t it?!

        1. Flickatina says:

          Damn! Rumbled!

          I’m a bit of a shit ninja!

    2. Kit says:

      Ha ha ha. Talk about love bombing!!! LOVE TRUMPS HATE! 😉

  27. Sunshine says:

    Uncomfortable reading.

    The high-stakes drama suggests to me a lean towards the sociopathic, rather than just narcissistic.

    I take your point about labels. However, everything on the blog is labelled ‘narcissist’. Not only is this a label, it also completely overlooks the sociopath. Certainly the more extreme and dangerous condition.

    I do think this approach is quite dangerous.

    Why is everything labelled as narcissism when you clearly have a much more serious condition?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I make it clear what I am. Part of the material is about those who are purely narcissists, hence the label of narcissism in those instances. When it is clearly written from my perspective, given that I have explained what I am, it ought to be evident in those situations that it is coming from the position of a narcissist sociopath. Plus, if I had to keep typing narcissist sociopath (or psychopath dependent on who you speak to) my fingers would be even more tired, I have adopted the stance that people understand this to be the case given that I have confirmed what I am.

      1. Sunshine says:

        I’m not sure it necessarily is so distinct.

        My concern is that people who are new to the concept of narcissism will visit your site looking to understand what they are experiencing, read a few of your more extreme posts, find it doesn’t tally with, and is way beyond what their run-of-the-mill narcissist is like, and conclude that they can’t be narcissists after all. Then get re-sucked into the drama once again.

        Interesting you say psychopath. I understand that there is a difference, although this isn’t universal. You do seem more like a psychopath that a sociopath. I thought sociopaths were more chaotic, uncontrollable. Whereas psychopaths are more conniving, strategic and sly.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I must admit Sunshine that there is evident confusion about the distinction between a sociopath and a psychopath and a lot of use of the terms interchangeably. The environmental impact through my upbringing accords with sociopathy, my level of control and strategic thinking accords more with psychopathy, the fact that I can distinguish between right and wrong but I do not care accords with sociopathy. This is why utilise the term Greater. I agree with your comment that the difference is not universal. Perhaps narcopath would be a better description and that such an individual might have been born this way or created from their environment and a distinction based on origin is not needed in the eventual label, but rather the label applies to the presentation of the behaviours. Thus you could state this person is a born narcopath and this person is a created narcopath – the eventual outcome is broadly similar.

          1. Noooooo! I don’t want you to be a psychopath! It sounds more creepy!

      2. Love says:

        Ah! Wonderful point! So all greaters are high functioning psychopaths / sociopaths?
        I admit the term Greater romanticizes the concept. It sounds much more appealing. I would never willingly want to meet a high functioning psychopath! But a Greater sounds like a suave intelligent narcissist with amazing game.

      3. Love says:

        Are all greaters high functioning psychopaths / sociopaths?

        1. HG Tudor says:


      4. Sunshine says:

        PTSD – psychopath or sociopath, what is in a name? Whatever we call this Tudor rose, he will still smell… different?

        He has provided thousands of words – all about himself. So the choice of label after consuming those words is mere shorthand. You know what he is, whatever you call him.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Good point.

  28. Sarabella says:

    “Society repeatedly fails to identify what we are and how we operate.”

    Yup. Pretty much the story of my life. Its why I admire few people in life unless i know them very, very well. There are far too many hidden abusers. I think I get why I was oblivious to your type of abuser. You are the meld of 3 adults in my life…. my fun and charming dad, my narc mom and my angry abusive bully step dad who I despised. I put them all together and voila! lol

    What’s to do? Run. Not much else to do except also to be there for other survivors.

    1. Kit says:

      Totally agree with your last sentiment! We should form a club. But not a whiners club, a WINNERS club, and HG will not be invited.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Too late Kit, I am already in it and I have locked the doors.

      2. Kit says:

        Replying to below: I have the skeleton key.

  29. Candy says:

    Im never goin to become involved again !!

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