10 thoughts on “The Heart Hooks No. 10”

  1. I’ve been reading your blog for some time now HG. You’ve taught me so much about N behaviours. But the similarity of the ‘lines’ that all Ns use never ceases to amaze me.

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  2. I get if this is being said in the first week, it’s a huge red flag. But what about 2-3 months into a relationship? At some point it has to become safe to hear these words, or along the lines.

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  3. I agree Clarece. I think I was (am) pretty guarded, a tough nut to crack (not my first time on this merry go round) and I would have run a mile from someone declaring such platitudes early on in the proceedings. When I think back to some of the things that *did* have a heart-hook effect on me, they were not big declarations like this, but small things. Same effect though…. just less obvious/more devious. I sleepwalked in this time around, it felt easy, natural. By the time the red flags started however, and the ‘gut feelings’ started, the hooks were obviously in deep enough.

    I now realise that words and actions should match up *every* time, hypocrisy/double standards should not be excused/ignored/explained away, and that red flags *must not* be glossed over.

    Every day’s a school day eh? šŸ™

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  4. Interestingly enough… always the alternative perspective/ random interpretation girl i am… not always on purpose…i just seem to see things differently.
    At 1st i took this to be a saying of the empath… and i was trying to twist my brain around that. then i read the comments and saw most people took it to be something the narc would say.
    Hmm. Either way. Interesting.
    True from both ends anyway. Could see it going either way and could make a case for either side.

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    1. I have to agree with you here. Both sides are attracted to one another that it can be said for both. Thought the same thing. Perspective is an interesting thing.

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  5. Good god, I’m gonna be a tough cookie when I actually do return to the dating world. I thought I was before. Like you, MLA, I would have run for the hills if hearing this early. My recent ex said this about 2 months in, though the hint of marriage at three months was a red flag I chose to ignore…silly me.. I now am not sure I will believe anything said, only acts.

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