Mind Games – Part Two
Having detailed some of the mind games that we deploy against you, this leads to the inevitable question of why do we do this? I daresay that some of you will be tempted to answer
“Because you are all arseholes.”
Whilst this is understandable and potentially accurate (when viewed from your perspective) it is not going to provide you with any insight into the workings of our minds and behaviours. Accordingly, I will expand on why it is we use mind games to comprehensively.
- Fuel. An obvious one and rightly the first one that is considered. The application of mind games to the dynamic between you and us is done in order to prompt an emotional reaction from you and thus garner fuel from you. Whether you become upset, distraught, frustrated, annoyed or angry as a consequence of the games being played, it is all fuel which we will readily drink up.
- Control. We are obsessed with control. Our environment must be beholden to us. We have to control everything around us in order to ensure that we continue to exist, receive fuel, minimise and remove risks and so forth. By subjecting you to mind games, we are able to achieve this need for control, since you become trapped by them, you remain paralysed by their effects as you try to establish what is happening, rather than knowing them for what they are and moving away from them.
- Future planning. It is a common outcome from entangling with our kind that you will be labelled as The Crazy One once you have been discarded or escaped, as part of the smear campaign. The mind games bring about such a state of mind in you that it becomes easy enough for us to point to your behaviour during devaluation, your behaviour post discard/escape and demonstrate that you are indeed unhinged. There are very few people who can actually resist the proliferation of mind games and not be affected by them in some way and many people are left at the end of their tether creating an appearance of being “crazy”.
- Façade management. By engaging in games where we are I control, you are seen as histrionic and volatile, where we are calm and pleasant to everybody but you and causing people to form an adverse view about you, this allows us to manage and maintain the façade. We have an array of lieutenants and members of our coterie who all regard us as decent and kind, which then makes your life even harder in terms of trying to persuade people about what we really are.
- Superiority reinforcement. We operate from the perspective that we are superior to everybody around us and especially you. By engaging in games where we are able to pull the string, make you upset and angry and exert control, this allows us to emphasise that we are indeed superior to you.
- Self-defence. Many of the mind games that we engage in are because we need to defend ourselves from being challenged or criticised. Hence when we project, deny, deflect and blame-shift, although there may be a collateral benefit in terms of how it affects you, the primary reason for engaging in these behaviour is to protect ourselves by rejecting blame, preventing your challenge and addressing criticism.
- Exhaustion. With any situation, you respond to it more effectively when you are rested and able to think in a clear manner. The deployment of mind games causes you to become exhausted which results in your lacking clarity, experiencing a reduced resistance and diminished will-power. This means that you are far less likely to try to escape what we are doing and far more likely to accept doing what we want.
- Plausible deniability. By operating within the vestiges of the spoken, gestures and actions, we are often able to maintain being vague and amorphous. This allows us to manipulate you to a further degree but also serves an incredibly useful purpose in denying that we have engaged in such behaviours to begin with, especially with a third party. If we are challenged by, for example, someone in authority, we can point to the absence of proof or turn it into the word of someone calm and reasonable against some frazzled, ranting Crazy Person.
- Impact. The impact of emotional and psychological abuse is invariably more difficult for the victim to handle than physical abuse. Whilst physical abuse is understandably unpleasant, the insidious nature of mind games means that the victim cannot grasp what is happening, cannot ascertain if they are being subjected to a mind game (being punched is obvious and unequivocal) and cannot fathom why they are being treated in this manner. You no doubt will have heard victims state,
“I would have preferred to have been physically assaulted than be put through the mental torture.”
For someone to choose physical injury over this underlines just how devastating the impact is.
- Lack of detectability. Alongside plausible deniability is the fact that a bruise is a bruise and therefore raises questions. It is far harder to determine the effect of the mind games. Yes, someone may present as exhausted, anxious, hypervigilant, terrified and so on, but there is always the potential for us to suggest that it is put on and/or is related to something else. It is harder to do this with physical abuse (although not impossible). Indeed, some people do not allow the effect of the mind games to be seen, preferring to keep it hidden from other parties.
- Erosion. If you suffer a broken arm, you can still function. You can use your other arm, you can walk places, talk, you can hear and see and so forth. The mind games naturally affect that which controls and governs everything you do. By wearing down your mind, we are able to grind you down, causing your resistance to weaken and preventing you from functioning in a manner which might aid your escape from us.
- Tenderising. The application of mind games through achieving erosion and exhaustion as described above means that in effect you are being “tenderised” for further manipulations to be applied against you with maximum effect.
- Empathic vulnerability. As a person who has empathic traits and thus the reason why you were targeted by us, you are more susceptible to these kind of behaviours. Mind games work especially well against you as a consequence of your traits such as honesty, decency, telling the truth, needing to understand, wanting to help and your emotional responses.
- Endeavour. Some of the mind games end up making you try harder to please and do things for us with the additional benefit which naturally arises from this.
- Power. This is applicable to the Greater Narcissist only as the Lesser and Mid-Range are not aware of the true extent of the application of mind games. The Greater Narcissist revels in being apply to treat somebody in this manner, distort their world, have them jumping and moving at their say so, causing them to fountain with fuel and have no idea how or why this is being done to them. The various manipulations and their outcomes means this appeals to the omnipotence which Greaters believe that they have.
15 thoughts on “Mind Games – Part Two”
.Oh HG, you have opened my mind and filled it with the power of KNOWLEDGE! I finally decided to leave a comment because I’m so grateful for what you have revealed. In watching your videos, reading some of your books, and traipsing all over your blog, I have laughed my butt off, cried, been stung by, and ultimately freed by you and the people out there who share this “fuel” for the SuperEmpath. Lucky enough to escape my UMR bf of a year, of course we get to delightfully “feel” our fuel in a much different way, but taking the “what the hell happened” and making it an “Oh, I understand” (not literally of course but conceptually) has helped my recovery go on steroids. NO CONTACT like a Ninja, and believe it or not, No Regrets for any of it. It could have gone on for years?
Hello JAPASM, good to have you make an appearance and I am pleased to see my work has had such a powerful impact on you. Keep reading and contributing.
a couple of months ago I was exhausted. One day coming home I had a distinct feeling of not being able to fight anymore. I felt I was doomed to stay with him and have the same life the other two had. I thought about giving up. I ran out of strenght, energy, motivation. I was miserable. The idea of becoming his care giver for the next 10 years or so, with nothing but times of sorrow, loneliness, pain and confusion was making me implode. As I walked I felt I was carrying a huge burden and I couldn’t shake it off, I couldn’t escape it.
If I can, now, think about another future for me, if I can see other options, if I was able to leave this story behind and live my life just like I want it to be it’s because of this place.
You are welcome Giulia, keep reading and you will achieve freedom.
@Giulia…I just want to say, I was similar if not worse than you. I somehow came upon this blog and the knowledge and understanding provided by Our Master has turned 13 years of my life around and pointed me in the right direction within a few months…. It is most inspirational and will forever be a part of my daily life to continue to understand…. stay here and as HG says “Seize the Power”…
Somebody would only hit me once before they were kicked to the curb. The head games are absolutely harder to pin down. You question your own part in it. Maybe you were too sensitive, brash, moody.
You can’t deny a punch. It is what it is
You made me cry with this one.
i have lots of thought here, my dearest HG & friends….
Reminds me of the night 2 days before our wedding, discussing some last details, just trying to confirm with him that he had taken care of a couple things, he says to me while calmly sitting and sipping a beer, “You can drive yourself to crazyville if you want, but I’m not going there with you.” If only I had known then what the hidden meaning was in those words.
HG, I would Rather be physically assaulted than ever Endure half that amount of time felt from the abuse of an NPD. Do u feel me?
#4: I lost count of the number of times he used to say to me, “Gabrielle you have been so utterly vile to me. And despite all of it, I have been nothing but respectful and wonderful to you.”
I only became “vile” because of all the mind games!
I also lost track of the number of times he told me that I should be on medication.
He also been directly blamed himself too. (although it was likely pretending to blame)….” have you ever wondered that maybe I exacerbate your anxiety?” Yes, he really said that to me.
Mind games indeed!
From “tenderized to Tudorised”!
I am now wondering HG, could my ex be close to a greater even though he denies being arrogant heatedly? His gas lighting, manipulations, passive aggression and lies combined were horrible! Definitely worse impact on me than past abuses I had previously. (Except perhaps the stalking of other exes… and physical threats of other exes)…but this one, I had panic, severe anxiety, brain fog, physical illness, and had to take medication for it. I was drained of my heart and soul. And in such a short time too (22 months rather than the multiple years I had with other exes). Sure, I’m better now and I did escape. Can a mid ranger execute such mental abuse to this degree that I questioned my own sanity and suffered more than others? Why I question his level is his level of intelligence, level of impact, appeared to enjoyment in duping me and others, and he did have somatic like traits too, though not excessively. He also had a MatriNarc. However, he also used silent treatments like crazy and was passive aggressive though very charming too. Hmmmm… maybe an upper level middy. He was hard core in mental manipulation though. Those games were his thing. Very well described HG. Do you think a middy can do this level of damage that I described? Remember, he blitzed me in the IGH.
A Middle and Upper Mid Ranger can do this yes. Indeed many people who have been ensnared by an UMR think that they have encountered a greater.
Thank you HG. yeah he was more likely an UMR.
You are welcome.