Outrage
Fury is the instrument of the narcissist. It is a tool that we deploy in furtherance of our aims. The narcissist’s toolbox is a thing to behold. It contains many devices, objects and instruments that we deploy in order to secure our objectives. Other people may use these devices in a similar if diminished form but they will not be anywhere near as dangerous and effective as the ones that lurk in my toolkit. Some of these instruments are used to subjugate, others are deployed to control and yet again there are others that will be used for the purposes of manipulation. The placing of fury in this toolbox recognises its use to the narcissist as one of his prime instruments.
All of our kind bring the fury but what is it? It will be instructive to start by considering what it is not. Fury is not anger. Anger is below fury on the scale of violent responses. Anger is a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility. It is greater than vexation, it is something more than feeling cross and it is beyond exasperation. Notwithstanding this, it is less than fury. It does not contain the unbridled vitriol that is synonymous with fury. Nor does it contain the violent hostility that one finds with fury. What is most important to know about anger is that it is a normal emotion and thus by comparison, fury is an abnormal emotion, hence why fury sits in our toolkit. Anger is an intense emotional response that is normal in nature and arises as a consequence of real or perceived provocation. Anger in itself is neither good nor bad. It can be used for either purpose and it is down to the manner in which that particular person handles it. An individual may direct it into violence towards another person in order to protect him or herself from a threat. Alternatively, it may manifest in the destruction of property. You as a normal and empathic individual become angry. Indeed, as part of our mission to obtain fuel we strive to provoke anger in you, either through angry gestures or through angry words on your part. This provides us with fuel when you react in this emotional fashion. It is an acceptable and understandable response for an individual to become angry.
It is a normal response to a threat or harm. It also releases pressure that builds up inside a normal person. The expression of anger enables people to dissipate this pressure and thereafter feel spent but better for having been angry, as opposed to suppressing the sensation and allowing the pressure to build even further. Some normal people can only take a small amount of pressure before they blow a fuse whereas other people may be regarded as slow-burners who take a long time before they express anger. In either instance the response is an entirely normal one. People become angry for a host of different reasons.
You may agree that anger certainly serves a purpose and concur that helpful and beneficial consequences can arise from this normal emotion. I should imagine that you will also venture to suggest that there is a downside to anger, that results in destructive behaviour and violence. That is not anger. That is fury. That is when something beyond anger is experienced and this fury is more prevalent amongst my kind.
Interestingly, anger also results in a suspension of empathy by those who behave normally. The individual, through anger, becomes focussed on his or her own needs and requirements. This is not applicable to me. There is no empathy to suspend. That is why we do not deploy anger. We have no need of a device to suspend our empathy because we do not have any. This is a further reason why anger serves no actual purpose to us and why we must deploy fury instead. Anger is a normal reaction. We operate outside of the usual normative values. This normal anger serves certain purposes. None of those purposes are of any use to my kind and me. Anger can be regarded as a force for good. That is not something that we are interested in.
Fury is beyond anger. It is wrath, frenzy and savagery. Someone who is furious has gone the extra emotional mile. One might even consider it to be madness. The wild nature of fury causes it to surpass anger and fury is not to be found in the responses of the normal person. I will emphasise that point. You will not find fury as a response of a normal person. Anger? Yes. Fury? No. The deployment of fury is the hallmark of the abnormal. If fury were a normal reaction there would be chaos as explosions erupted everywhere. Most relationships would disintegrate, more people would be injured, and property broken and destroyed and the repercussions for society as a whole would be severe. The cost in terms of money, emotion and well-being would be enormous. Consider the number of times you have been angry. It has happened has it not? You will also be able to recall when your parents or at least one of them became angry, a friend, a stranger, a colleague or a partner. You have seen anger in everyone and that is because it is normal. They may have used that anger for some purpose, kept it in check or let it flow over them and dissipate with no consequence. For those of you have had an encounter with fury, you will also know it. It will have happened amongst fewer people than the categories that I have just mentioned. This is because the development of people has been such that fury cannot become the norm. If it does then society would begin to break down. You may have seen many instances of fury from one particular individual. That is because that person is not normal. They are the exception.
40 thoughts on “Outrage”
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Myself as well though i had to learn how to contain my rage at a very young age…
Ms brown
Thank you for understanding. It is nice to know that I am not alone. I am getting better at controlling it but it is a work in progress.
My containment was not healthy, though, as it was forced (my earliest recall around 3 years old) Repressed rage can manifest to be quite harmful to self and others. i am still learning, as are you ❤︎
My empath tool box has a few tools: No contact, a few gray rocks, and rage, I have to add Zero Impact. My tool box is pathetic and pales in comparison to the narcissists’s tool box but it has helped protect me from my family, ex, and friends with NPD. The one thing my tool box has that the narcissist can never have is love. Love that is so strong that it sometimes helps me temper my uncontrollable rage. But I choose when to use the love, and sometimes I just want uncontrollable rage because it feels so good. It fills me with hatred for the people who tried to destroy me (and my twin) and it makes me feel alive. Rage is beautiful.
K, i like this….
Ms brown
Thank you! Many people are uncomfortable with rage, but I grew up with my father’s fury so I am somewhat acclimated to it.
…I experienced many forms of my ex narc’s Fury…but one that came into my attention the most was his “Silent Fury”.
Whenever I said something that he took as a criticism…he just went silent,his eyes got smaller and empty,dark,his face twisted and his mouth had a peculiar ” grin”, his body tensed….but he said nothing..just quiet for a moment. Now I know he “controlled ” that Fury then and he was making a ” mental” note,keeping it for later on…I knew something was coming but I didn’ know what or when…
Is this prsent just with the Greaters? The Silent Fury or is it present on the other schools as well?
This is the manifestation of the ignited fury being controlled and is seen most with the Greater and very occasionally with the Mid-Ranger.
Thank you for your answer HG!
This “Silent /Controlled Fury” lasted just for some seconds…switching almost immediately to ” normal”( like asking me for example :” where would you like to go out for dinner? .) Like nothing happened….
Like if he had an “on-off” switch…
Does this fall into this Silent /Controlled Fury?
I just wanted to share as well how I felt this silent fury:
For him it took a matter of seconds..for me it felt like ages..
I felt like being paralysed and electrified ( at the same time). I got like a “tunnel vision”.
Like time stopped,like he was transporting me ( together with him) into a dark and endless tunnel..with no end..
How does a Greater ( feel) experience this ” controlled” fury?
Sent from my iPad
Yes it does.
I feel the fury rising but recognise that the situation is best served by keeping it under control. The most effective way I find to do this is imagining gutting the victim as I begin my plotting to unleash the fury at a later time against the disloyal appliance. Formulating this plan assists in maintaining the control. You may think I am smiling at you, but beneath that cold, reptilian smile, I am imagining and planning all manner of terrible acts.
So in that instance, is it possible the Supply isn’t even aware yet that they may have wounded you? Or is there a definite tension and coldness in the air when you’re giving that smile?
The former. The appliance usually does not know.
Thank you for your answer HG.
Although I didn’ t know then what was happening..as I stated : I felt something was wrong..really wrong…
I thought silences were most used by mid-rangers?
Hello Jenna!
I think you are confusing things a little bit: this is not referring to the Silence Treatment ( mostly use by Mid-Rangers) but it is referring to the controlled Fury. !!! Two different things…
Thx SX.
Never saw it … but after I left the hoovers have been all about payback it feels. NC and CD is killing me.
Wish you could do the magic for my father also.
All my life so far has been about surviving my father.
Each day is a new standard of lies, verbal abuse…and more that I don’t want to think about….
He is sick, now…God forgive me but I cannot deny that in my heart I hope he dies….and so do the rest of my family.
It isn’t evilness on our side, just the painful admission of the only thing that would set us free from the madness that plagued us from our birth.
While we had to watch him destroy us repetedly, for the rest of the world he was a “saviour”.
And it is now a matter of who will survive the other. Is he going to kill us or are we going to be the last one standing?
Giulia
You will be standing, and much taller from the weight being removed.
:))) I am 5ft 7 inches….thank you NA…I surely hope so <3
https://youtu.be/kOkQ4T5WO9E
Sorry…178 cm…
HG i think that’s you in the pic with the blue eyes. You are handsome, but you look scary when in fury. Shudder!!
When is your first memory of feeling fury and not just anger?
With all of the childhood abuse, did you already have to learn controlling your fury in your adolescence?
You will read about this in due course Clarece.
I did but it often manifested.
How does it make your kind feel when somebody sees through you and your mindgames? Do you avoid that person for good who used to be a great IPSS? Or at some stage you will still consider to return when obviously there is nothing much to gain?
From my personal position it does not happen.
From a wider narcissistic perspective, if that happens then we would look to switch manipulations ad if that does not work we may well dis-engage and switch to an alternative fuel source.
We may well return to that individual if we perceive that the potential gains for the Prime Aims outweigh the risk of them being largely impervious to our manipulations.
The reality is most people who are in our grip do not realise that this is the case and even when they start to work things out, the effect of our abuse and the conning effect of emotional thinking drags them back in.
What if finding an alternative fuel source proves to be very difficult almost impossible when it comes to IPSS?
Not so much a problem if there is an IPPS in place.
Yes ,Hg.I Have Seen This.My MALE NARCISSIST FRIEND It’s Almost As If When He Stop s By He,s Checking The Damage He Has Caused ¡ My M. S. Has Got Much WORSE My Sleep IS CONSTANTLY. Interrupted With PAIN PHYSICAL EMOTIONAL! I Can’t Remember As Well As Before My NARCISSIST Arrived But What Would You Expect From Someone Who Said ( I WILL DESTROY YOU !?🚽🚽🚽🔥🔥🔥!
the picture is frightening
Can fury manifest itself as constant silent treatment & ignoring coupled with passive aggressive retribution?
Yes it can. Please read Fury to understand more about cold fury.
There will be plenty of fury in the world once HG has conquered all the narcissists and brought about an empathic revolution. A huge battlefield of furious zombies wreaking havoc… beating up shop keepers, random wives and sisters being raped, buildings set on fire, exploding firework factories.
Tertiary sources with Freddy Kruegar sized slash prints across their torsos. Screaming wailing employees thrown from buildings by the backs of their pants.
Then the furious zombies will come after HG Tudor, but he has a cunning surprise up his sleeve to lead him to victory…
The great wall of empaths, standing behind him. Row upon row of crying pathetic crazy messes, waving their countries flag, but refusing to budge. Some of them are menstruating, so watch out.
Na na na na na na na na NarcMan
Issue #2 out next week. Around teatime.
I love provoking fury. I know it’s not a good idea but I just can’t help myself. And I’ve been on a bit of a roll. I’m not so keen when I know retaliation could follow. But there have been a few occasions recently when I know I have invoked fury in a greater female N at work. Oh I could see and feel the fury, only a glimpse before she pulled herself together but it was enough for me to know the affect I’d had on her. I was untouchable on these occasions and now some distance out of reach or I would have avoided it – well maybe. You’ve taught me well HG.
But this would be showing the real facade “to the world” and after the fury attack, how can he mends his image again? Isn’t it a weakness for you? Fury=weakness…(at least in my empath mind…)
Totally laughing my ass off right now 😂😹👯👯♂️
Laughing your ass off ICY?
What is it then? Have you gone over the edge because of too much wrath from a narc…or you are simply so mad that you have no clue of what’s your reality?
HG, the Greater always hide his fury?
Not always, more often than not.
Hello Bri!
I guess the fury manifests differently depending on what type of narcissit it is…