10 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Truths – No. 136”
HG, is there such a thing as too much or over the top praise to a narc, specifically, a mid ranger? Does it ever feel too overwhelming or off-putting? Thank you!
Thanks so much, HG! Makes sense. My problem is I know on the head level what I am dealing with but my feelings go completely against the head knowledge and I can’t help but continue pouring out praise and the sad thing is I really mean it too.
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Often, my ex-mid would not say ‘thank u’ when i complimented him. He is of a quiet and subdued nature. He would rather say ‘it is what it is’ or ‘no not really’
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That was when he was high on fuel. During depression, he says ‘thx’
‘My self’ depends/alternates (hopefully always).
[Had to laugh: “MyTrueSelf” – “depending on the time of day” – sure!
Dear MyTueSelf, I understood, what you ‘said’.]
Hmm… I guess it is a General Truth also, but the Narcs express it more distinctly (in offensive way).
We all are different. You just can’t be good enough for everyone. You can be too much for someone. It is absolutely normal. It is not a problem.
The problem is how you signal to someone that he/she isn’t the “right” person for you.
The Normals do it politely and gently, trying to not wound you.
The Narcs do it in offensive and degrading way. The first sign is ignoring your personality. The second is the silent treatments (more profound variant of ignoring). And then the mental games (destructive) or physical abuse begin.
It doesn’t matter whether you are too much or not good enough for someone. Matter that you are not “right” for that person. And this is a signal to leave that person for good. Anyway, it won’t work out, so no need to “torture” neither that person, nor yourself. It is a life as it is.
HG, is there such a thing as too much or over the top praise to a narc, specifically, a mid ranger? Does it ever feel too overwhelming or off-putting? Thank you!
No, but if it is insincere we will notice.
Thanks so much, HG! Makes sense. My problem is I know on the head level what I am dealing with but my feelings go completely against the head knowledge and I can’t help but continue pouring out praise and the sad thing is I really mean it too.
Often, my ex-mid would not say ‘thank u’ when i complimented him. He is of a quiet and subdued nature. He would rather say ‘it is what it is’ or ‘no not really’
That was when he was high on fuel. During depression, he says ‘thx’
Oh, hi Mom. Had no idea you knew of this forum.
‘My self’ depends/alternates (hopefully always).
[Had to laugh: “MyTrueSelf” – “depending on the time of day” – sure!
Dear MyTueSelf, I understood, what you ‘said’.]
……….depending on the time of day…
Hmm… I guess it is a General Truth also, but the Narcs express it more distinctly (in offensive way).
We all are different. You just can’t be good enough for everyone. You can be too much for someone. It is absolutely normal. It is not a problem.
The problem is how you signal to someone that he/she isn’t the “right” person for you.
The Normals do it politely and gently, trying to not wound you.
The Narcs do it in offensive and degrading way. The first sign is ignoring your personality. The second is the silent treatments (more profound variant of ignoring). And then the mental games (destructive) or physical abuse begin.
It doesn’t matter whether you are too much or not good enough for someone. Matter that you are not “right” for that person. And this is a signal to leave that person for good. Anyway, it won’t work out, so no need to “torture” neither that person, nor yourself. It is a life as it is.
Contradictions.