G.O.S.O One
What is G.O.S.O. ?
It is the golden concept of ‘Get Out, Stay Out’ which is what every victim of our kind ought to apply to their situation.
Whether you have realised that you have been ensnared by a narcissist or you now realise that this particular person is an abuser, GOSO is always applicable.
Those who have not been caught up in an entanglement with our kind may regard this as blindingly obvious. Of course, what they do not realise is that GOSO has two formidable enemies ; us and you – thus applying GOSO is far harder than they realise.
Of these two enemies it is evident why we are the first one. We regard you as our property, no matter where you sit in the fuel matrix, from NITS to IPPS, you belong to us and you are there to serve the fulfilment of the Prime Aims. The higher your status in the Fuel Index, the greater the effort that will be applied to keep you in place. You will be fully familiar with many of the various manipulations we use to ensure you go nowhere and remain in situ. Our Devil’s Toolkit is used to make sure you are compliant, pumping out fuel and under our control. This control is often substantial, however, you start to recognise the manipulations, you learn about gas lighting, triangulation, word salad and so on and begin to see when these are used. You begin to realise that you should not be treated in this way and with your increased understanding you start to loosen the grip that we have on you.
You begin to see matters in a different light. You now see an abuser, a narcissist, stood before you and not the person you once thought we were. Your resolve increases, your determination solidifies as you realise that you need to remove yourself from our toxic influence. You know what you are dealing with now – it is time to get out. However, there is a second enemy that has loomed into view – you.
You are your own enemy or more specifically, your emotional thinking is. You know you need to get out. Getting out maybe the clear act of ending the formal relationship, moving out of a property or moving us out – implementing no contact and that is the ultimate aim. Sometimes it is getting out of the abusive environment even though you cannot implement no contact, but you are getting out of the influence and detrimental behaviour that you have endured for so long. Whichever one it is, you realise it is time to get out.
It is then that this second enemy of emotional thinking strikes. Emotional thinking is a con artist. Its sole aim is to ensure that your addiction to us is fed. Emotional thinking does not have your interests at heart, although it will pretend that it does. You are trying to remove yourself from one con artist just as another appears although this one is just as hard to spot as our kind. Your emotional thinking wants to always be your first response in any situation concerning our kind because it wants to ensure that you keep feeding the addiction to us. This means that you have to keep engaging with us, thinking about us, seeing us, doing things for us. By remaining within our influence, the addiction remains fed and emotional thinking will do whatever it can to maintain that situation.
Emotional thinking is your enemy in this situation. It has no interest in the fact that your self-confidence has vanished, that you are utterly exhausted, that you are confused, that you are nursing a broken arm, that you are bleeding money, that your sense of self is evaporating, that you have lost your friends, that your job is suffering and a hundred other misfortunes. All it cares about is ensuring that you do not get out. By stopping this happening, the addiction is fed.
Accordingly, this sly and devious emotional thinking will occupy your thoughts as quickly as it can in order to keep cool, hard logic at bay. Unfortunately for you, it does this with considerable ease because :-
- You are unlikely to fully understand what is happening at the juncture when you recognise a need to get out;
- You have been repeatedly conditioned by our manipulation to adopt emotional thinking, so that it is always the immediate response when you are making decisions;
- Your ability to cope will have been reduced. Emotional thinking offers you the ‘easy’ option (but not the right option) and when you are ground down, this has considerable appeal.
So, what is the consequence? Your logical thinking tells you “This person is bad for me, I need to get out.” Before logical thinking can add anything else, your emotional thinking surges and drowns it out and instead fills your mind with what it wants you to think. Indeed, so significant is this emotional thinking that it becomes your only way of thinking and ‘takes over’ in terms of what you do. Emotional thinking is governing you and because it is, you are unable to see that it is. It removes your insight. That is why you often look back and think “What the hell was I thinking? That wasn’t me”. That is because you were placed on auto-pilot by your emotional thinking and you took a course of action without realising the impact of it, because your logical thinking could not get a look in.
How does this emotional thinking manifest? It is devious as I mentioned, because what it does is masquerade as something which is linked to your empathic traits so it convinces that what you are doing is actually ‘good’ and the ‘right thing’ to do. All part of its conning nature. Thus, when you have that brief moment of logic and decide that you need to get out, emotional thinking is alerted and realises there is a danger to getting its fix of the addiction to us. It surges and manifests in many different ways, such as :-
“But if I leave, how he will be able to manage. I will feel bad for him.” – this links to your traits of decency and feeling guilt.
Logic would say
“Why be concerned about how we will manage? He has never been concerned about how you have managed? You do not have to be responsible for this person. Get out.”
Yet logic is unheard.
Emotional thinking will say :-
“But what if he can change, he said he will get therapy and he has made an appointment. What if I go and miss out on him changing for the better?” – this links to your traits of hope and the desire to heal.
Logic would tell you
“He is a narcissist. He will not change. He cannot change. You have no need to stay. Get out.”
Yet logic is unheard.
Emotional thinking will say:-
“Now isn’t a good time it is his birthday/her mother just died/she has a big project at work/he isn’t well.” – this links into your traits of guilt and decency.
Logic would tell you
“Now is the right time. He spoiled your birthday/ she didn’t care when your father died/ he has never supported your work/ she never looked after you when you were unwell. You deserve better. Get out.”
Yet logic is unheard.
Here are further examples of the emotional thinking which stops you getting out. Are any familiar? What would logical thinking be telling you in response if it was heard?
“I don’t have anywhere to go to and I like living in this house.”
“But what if the children want to see him and that upsets them?”
“I am frightened of what he will do to me.”
“He said if I ever left him he would post those videos and pictures on the internet.”
“I don’t want to feel like I have failed and give up on us.”
“I know she is seeing someone else, what if I go and they end up happy together? Why should I give them a clear run at a relationship together?”
“But I still love her.”
“He needs my help, i cannot walk away from someone who is needing help.”
“She hasn’t got anybody else but me.”
“It will be too hard to do it. I just need to find a way of making him happy instead.”
“What will I do for money? He controls it all, I will be destitute.”
“I am scared to date again.”
“What will people think though if I go, it will make him look bad at work and to his friends.”
“It could be worse, I mean, she is wonderful sometimes and the sex is amazing. I can put up with it for the good times surely?”
“I am getting old and I don’t want to have to start all over again.”
“I would go, but I have to stay for the sake of the children.”
“I am not giving up, you have to fight sometimes to save a relationship and I am a fighter.”
“I just have to love him more. Love will save the day. It has to.”
Your emotional thinking will use fear, guilt, hope, dedication, valiance, selflessness, status, loyalty and more besides to make you stay and derail your attempt to get out.
A fundamental part of Getting Out is to recognise that it is your emotional thinking that is talking to you, that this is not the right way of thinking and that this emotional thinking is a con artist.
By disciplining your mind to recognise emotional thinking, you will then allow logic an opportunity to make itself heard. When logic makes itself heard, emotional thinking will fight back, but the more you engage in recognising this emotional thinking and allowing logic to make itself heard, the easier it will become until you will instinctively realise you are adopting emotional thinking and you will then apply logic. Keep maintaining this discipline and you will then find that logic will start to prevail and you are conquering the second enemy so that you now see no reason to remain and your stated desire to get out will be fulfilled.
How might you bring about the state of affairs? The major one is to build your understanding by reading. This develops your logic and provides you with material that your mind can go to instead of just finding emotional thoughts which will not help you. You need to have a repository of material which your mind can access which reminds you of what you are dealing with.
There are also numerous techniques to adjust your thought process, but I will explain one to you now. One method is to find a totem. Find an object, it might be a polished stone from the beach, it might be a lump of amethyst, a piece of jewellery belonging to someone special, an unusual coin, a stress ball – it can be anything so long as it fits into your hand. This then needs to be placed somewhere you will see it every day – on your nightstand, on the console table by the front door, next to the sink in the bathroom. Every day you must take the totem and wrap your hand around it, feel it in your hand and then ask yourself
“I must GOSO. What would logic tell me to do?”
Chances are the first response will be a piece of emotional thinking similar to those listed above. Halt the thought and assess it. Is this logic or emotional thinking? Recognise what it is. If, as expected, it is emotional thinking then destroy that thought by working out what the logic is – you will find the logical thinking will appear quicker than you would imagine because you have been building your understanding.
Do this every day around the same time. You will then find that when you have an emotional thought you will recognise to go to your totem, hold it and reject the emotional thought and work out the logic. You may need to go to your totem a dozen times a day, but steadily you are building your logic, reducing your reliance on emotional thinking and then you will find you are doing it without needing to go to your totem because you have reset your thinking. As this happens, you will then find the clarity and resolve to get out and not be stopped.
It is not easy. We instinctively know that your mind is fighting to prevent you from getting out and we rely on this in tandem with our own endeavours to keep you under our control. However, by building your understanding and resetting your thinking, you will get your emotional thinking under enough control to act on the need to get out.
GOSO 2 addresses how emotional thinking tries to derail your need to stay out once you have got out.
179 thoughts on “G.O.S.O One”
Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)
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HG, have you ever used a totem or a mantra?
Even as a self soothing tool as a child.
I have a crystal I keep under my pillow.
I hold it before sleep.
I allow no one else to touch it, so it only holds my positive energy.
Is this the same thing?
The sexual comments on the suggestion of your choice of totem were interesting and laughable.
No totem, I have the mantra of Victoria Aut Mort.
HG, do you often silently repeat said mantra? Or yell it when required?
Only on occasion when it is required and I do not yell it.
I meant to say this yesterday but when I read this it almost seemed like it was written by somebody else . I am not questioning that he is the author but the tone and content was completely different than all previous articles in my oponion.
You hear that HG2 she thinks it was someone else.
I know HG1, maybe it was HG3?
No, he is busy elsewhere in Africa, might have been HG4.
Could be, shall we ask him?
Ha, ha, ha, you are funny HG.
He’s a hoot!!
I think it was HG USA not HG GB.
Lol well.if any of you are in Africa kindly kill my exnarc for me no worries if u get caught just blame one of the other hgs
Wow, HG. What an incredibly helpful and insightful article.
Is this a new article?
Was it promoted by something timely in your own personal life?
HG, is your current IPPS an emotional or logical thinker ?
Would you say most empaths are emotional thinkers until they GOSO?
It is new, yes
Emotional. All empaths are emotional thinkers and will always remain that way, they key is to recognise that, reset your thinking and apply logic when dealing with our kind.
This has limited less value for all empaths to reach safety and healing.
I can be rather emotional as well.
Perhaps a combination of both.
Thank you, HG. I eagerly await part two.
HG— apply logic when dealing with our kind.
^oh is that all –_–
Thank you so much for this. Couldn’t be anymore timely. So far my healing has been mainly rational by coming here and reading the articles, but now you’ve provided a solution to get rid of the emotional infection. Can’t wait to get to work. Many many thanks!
You are welcome.
Hg,
“… from NITS to IPPS, you belong to us … ”
Huh? We are all non intimate tertiary sources, but remote. Do u feel we belong to u? All 47,000+ subscribers?!
Yes.
Of course you realize that the flip side to that is true also. Many here believe that you belong to us as well. In reality I think both viewpoints are equally valid – and equally erroneous. The truth is that no one really “belongs” to anyone. That thinking of people belonging to us or wanting them to belong to us is the cause of most of the problems we are here on this blog trying to overcome.
Oh I recognise that WS2, of course I belong to nobody.
I am changing my name to nobody. JK
I agree with that 100%!
All of us belong to u?!!
And u state the mid-ranger is delusional!!
Exactly! 👍🏻👍🏻
Windstorm, i hope ur drive to kansas was safe. Were the cuties waiting up for u, ie. ur grandkids?
jenna
Of course we all belong to HG, but who cares; we are all NITSs* and hopefully we will always have a permanent GP.
Non-intimate tertiary source
Where are you taking us for dinner?
LYNG – love everything you said. “Helping me unscramble my mind, heart and soul.” Even though some well meaning friends say I need to just let it go and move on, and sometimes I think they are right, that is what being here is helping me do. Thank you HG. This article was incredibly helpful.
“What the hell was I thinking? That wasn’t me”. This is SO MUCH how I feel about N2 and N3. I seriously look back and don’t even recognize “that (pathetic) person” who was putting up with all of their immature, ridiculous crap! It’s embarrassing. My emotional thinking still argues with my logic on the regular, about N1 though. I keep making excuses and trying to believe it’s the manic part of his bi-polar disorder being “confused” for narcissism, but all the patterns are there. So much so that I feel that HG, is reading my life (narcissistic much? Lol) … It freaks me out how sometimes you do a post that directly addresses my current thoughts. I’d think you were him sometimes if I didn’t know you were from the U.K.
When emotions bring on the excuses, I feel my logic and pride screaming in the background, “HE DOESN’T CARE ABOUT YOU! What exactly do you miss??? The good parts weren’t real. Not at least the way you hoped. They never were.” I’m a smart girl. I would never let anyone new treat me this way. It’s so confusing that it’s hard not to think I’m totally losing it sometimes, and can’t make sense of my own thoughts, trying to come to grips with and accept the logic. Addiction is the only thing that I can try to relate it to. I think the FOG is starting to lift, and NC is becoming my norm as opposed to struggling not to msg him every single night, but I still struggle and stalk many nights and I definitely still have…. miles to go before I sleep.
IJ — 💯 everything you said!
I agree with this article and many others but the key point as you stated, HG, multiple times is that logic over emotion needs to take precedence in most if not all situations, especially where there is a preponderance of evidence of red flags visually or felt instinctually, in any relationship. Immediate planning for an escape must be prepared in an intelligent, smooth and calm manner sometimes immediate by the would be victim.
I’d say to the victim – close your senses, delay your pain and just GOSO.
Sometimes I wish I could contribute more to this site with more in depth analysis referring to feelings and emotions like other bloggers do but after reading the articles and the many comments I realized that I don’t have the same natural inclination to dissect and express sentiments in a similar fashion, and at times I would probably have an opposing view. I couldn’t have a career in my field of work showing emotions anyhow. I do rely quite a lot on voice tone, body language, words, facts etc to make my judgement and decisions. It is indeed fascinating to me how others write about their feelings and that is one of the reasons I continue reading some of the comments here.
Why do i miss my ex mid-ranger rn? 😢
I never contact him but i feel like it now. But i won’t. Maybe my defenses are down becoz i’m down w a cold.
Actually, he contacts me every month. But someone we both know texted him to keep away frm me. The coward that he is, he will keep away. So now i must contact him. Damn! Or maybe not. Idk. He is nice to me – doesn’t extract negative fuel. He’s v pleasant. We r not intimate btw. Intimacy i will NEVER allow again.
You don’t miss him, Jenna — you miss what he pretended to be. The reason he was being nice and contacting you is probably the same as with my ex: to the mid-ranger, the facade is everything. They desperately want everyone to think they’re wonderful, even discarded sources. And they want to maintain contact so they can maintain control, even though they’ve moved on to another source. By contacting him, all you would do is enable his feeling of control and of maintaining the facade. Stay strong! Concentrate on enabling YOURSELF.
This is most needed information for me.I do not have to worry about the Hoover with my narc.
But I really needed the lesson on how emotional thinking is my part of the problem. The idea that I can separate the two kinds of thinking and rely on logic, how to focus on logical thinking when emotional thinking tries to take over.
I will have to reread it, possibly print it out to have on hand.
Will choose a totem while traveling this upcoming week.
Looking forward to part 2
I have copied and pasted this into my Word documents! This is a
“keeper”. I also printed it out and put it where I can always find it. I do this all the time (emotional thinking), not just with narcissists. Thank you so much, HG!!! You did good! 👏
I love this…Thank you HG, your the gift that’s keeps on giving.
Another favorite! Im definitely going to try the totem idea. Ive been using a similiar tactic to reset my thinking in conjunction to anxious thoughts. I love this idea of resetting thinking patterns.
The emotional thinking is usually excuses out of fear. Fear of losing that person and what we get from them. In my case its so many reasons why im struggling to leave. I do love my narc but logic would say how can you love someone whose done the things they have to you? Emotional thinking says hes done so many sweet things and has always been there for me. Logical…of course he has to keep you bound in the relationship. Emotional but i enjoy being with him most times. Logical…but whats going to be the cost of this relationship? More distance between you and your hubby and being addicted to someone you have no business being with. Then fear sets in and even more excuses are made. Fear of being lonely. Fear of depression. Fear of not being able to adjust without him in my life. Guilt is next. How could i ever leave him. What would that do to him after 7 yrs together and all weve shared. Logical would say let him go so he can move on and live his life as a single man without a married woman in the picture. You need to work on your marriage what you shouldve done prior to meeting him.
Logic thinking is healthy thinking it guides you to do whats right for all involved. I look at others out there that have done the right thing and i have so much respect for them bc it takes strength to do whats right despite what your emotional thoughts tell you.
I don’t know how I will ever learn to stop thinking emotionally this is my biggest challenge hopefully someday I’ll get there
Oh. My. God. I so wish I had known what I was dealing with years ago. You may have literally saved my life, on top of what little sanity I feel I have left. Second separation is in the works. My emotional thinking and listening to the repeated I’ll change, I’m sorry, we have so much in common, remember the good times….I just wanted who I THOUGHT he was and the person he projects himself to be to the world. I am the ONLY person to ever see the “other side” of him, therefore I must be the crazy one….
13 years. We live in a very small town. I would like to still see my step daughters and new grand daughter. And I have to give that up? These monsters destroy so much more than is realized. Thankful I found you H.G.
“I must GOSO”
I must GO! SO…
HG, Logical thinking is the hardest thing for me to do! I have been an emotional thinker most of my life! I actually stop myself at times now when I realize it’s emotion and not logic that I’m getting ready to say or do. It’s working for the most part, however their are still certain areas that I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to use logic with. Thank you for this post! It’s fantastic! I have my totem for other things but have never thought to use it as you have just written. Thank you so very much! Xxx
《Every day you must take the totem and wrap your hand around it, feel it in your hand and then ask yourself
“I must GOSO. What would logic tell me to do?”》
DEAREST HG,
I imagine all of your 49,172 subscribers doing that…
😂
I imagine also a sensitive part of the body as the totem…
《wrap your hand around it, feel it in your hand》
😊😋😘
P.S. What my logic would tell me?
“H.G. Tudor is making fun of you!
You stupid Empath!”
🙃
Holy f**k I just re-read that slow and now I am all hot and bothered.
HG, if you ever do another contest again can first prize be a night of passion with you? LOL. Just kidding. Maybe. With my luck I will end up on my period. Shout out to Jenna! Boom! Mic drop! Goodnight Empaths! 🙂
Gabs, remember hg doesn’t mind period sex. He will do it for the fuel! Just like he had to sit thru ‘battlefield earth’ for fuel! Poor guy! 😂
HG, when is ur birthday? I would like to send a dvd of ‘battlefield earth’ to u! 😂
Good times hg, good times!😜
Gabrielle,
1. You know there are pills to stop or delay your period..( only on prescription here in the UK tho).
My ex made some plans for us once and the last thing i wanted was to have my T.O.M ..So I went to see the doctor and I told him I have been bleeding heavily for nearly two weeks and it won’t stop. This is how desperate I was . A bit naughty but it worked.
2. You are the prize.
Jenna/Abrokenwing…LOL you ladies crack me up! Bloody fuel. Pun intended. Hahahahaha!!!
No idea on period stopping pills. I am not in the UK, I am in the US. I wish they had such a thing here as period stopping pills!
You know you can manipulate your period with birth control pills? Ask your doctor but dont tell your somatic narc if you have one unless you never want another break lol.
Gabs, abw, narcangel,
I always have him use the condom. I do not wish to take pills and alter my natural schedule for a man. If he refuses, he may leave. I usually combine it with the rhythm method of birth control though, and vcf. I hope that’s not tmi!! Lol!
And ya, he can wait if i’m on my periods. Patience is a virtue! 😉
When I want something badly nothing’s gonna stop me.
Narc Angel,
Oh I know that! I was on BCP ages ago. I am trying to avoid hormonal BC though! I do not need to worry about pregnancy as I had a tubal ligation done (I have 3 kids and do not need anymore hahaha…). I just wish there was a non hormonal way to end my period. I am seeing my doc in a few weeks to discuss getting an ablation done. Basically what that is is they do a surgery to burn and scar the uterus. They’ll only do it if you’re done having kids. It is supposed to (hopefully) help with the heavy bleeding and in some cases make period stop all together. Here is hoping! Now if only I could meet someone new….LOL.
Darn,
Will probably have a hard time using a totem for a while with that picture in my head!
Haven’t held that particular sensitive body part in my hands for so long, it will be doubly distracting.
Masterful and much needed logical advice HG. Looking forward to part 2.
Excellent piece, HG! This will help so many people! I am genuinely impressed with the amount of good you are doing in the world from your “evil” perch. If you were an empath, you’d be a Super for sure!
Brilliant HG, something I need to learn and practise , even when I was a manager and then a regional manager I struggled constantly with managing staff as it did not come easily to me to seperate my personal sympathy with staff and their ability to do the job. I think you would make an excellent life coach or whatever you call it !! Or Working as a consultant for businesses / companies on this very subject . I actually think you make a very good therapist ( ironically )
I stayed because of our daughter and hope.
Manipulated: Chapter 25. Hope
“Hope dies last.”
Hi K,
It can understand why you stayed. It is not easy to make decisions when there are children involved, partly because they say separation or divorce is traumatic for children. Parents feel guilty. However, it is rarely mentioned that children have already been traumatized by the narcissistic parent anyway and that the effects of living long-term with a narcissist are worse than those of separation or a divorce.
Thank you, E.B.
I desperately wanted us to be a family and hoped that the boyfriend that I knew during the GP would come back, but I realized he was gone by February 2014. Our daughter saw us argue and she still remembers it well. Things are much better now and our daughter knows what he is; I teach her everything that I learn here and we are better off with him gone.
Utter perfection….I read this and was completely drawn in. I am in the throws of an ugly fear tactic used by my Narc b/c for the 100th time I tried to get out and he resorted to blackmail. Only this time for the first time – I didn’t even care. Go figure… Luckily for me I’ve been saving everything for 6 months now and when i shared that with him his tune changed…he’s been quiet for 5 days now and I am anticipating his next move – I’m ready for war and he knows it. ;)….the emotional side of me again comes in though saying “well he did this out of fear of losing me”, “he is emotionally deficient and reacts on pure survival emotions – rage, anxiety etc…I should maybe understand his mindset” – the logical side of me says – “he went and screwed with the wrong woman” LOL – kidding that’s just as emotional – hahahahaha… my logical side is he deceived you and took video without your consent in order to blackmail you – don’t EVER take his calls and go to a lawyer IMMEDIATELY! I’ve been playing chess for a year now – basically…and I want the checkmate
I love the usage of the word “utter”. For emphases!
Hello HG!!!
How are you? I still think about you everyday even though I haven’t been commenting. I do still read and try to keep up. I love all the letters that you have been putting out. I can’t think of one thing to say to ex. Not sure what that means.
Your voice and knowledge are ingrained in my brain and I need you there to get through my days.
I loved this article. I have always been an emotional person but didn’t understand how my emotional thinking was my biggest downfall. I’m sure my ex spotted this from the very beginning and used it against me the whole time.
I believe this is why I can say I I still love her and miss her. I thought those feelings would go away by now but they haven’t. I still would not contact her and I have stayed way out of her spheres thanks to you. I have noticed on here that there are some readers who are quick to get over their exes and it takes a much longer time for others. Does it have to do with what type of empath we are?
As I have gone back out in this world and become more social in the past few months I question everything but I can see how the emotional thinking fights with the logical thinking. It’s sooo much easier for me to run with my emotions.
I find it hard to be friends with people because I just don’t know what’s normal anymore.
I have made friends with someone new and within the past few weeks she has called me pet names, started texting me everyday, and given me gifts.
In my before Narc life I would think this is all normal because I would do it myself with no agenda but now I think about it all and wonder if my problem is that the emotional vs. logical is a big war in my brain.
I would love to have you escort me for 24 hours.
Any updates on your books or how your therapy is going?
Hello Snow White, good to know you have still been reading, I thought you would do so, most people do even if they do not comment as often. Nevertheless, always good to hear from you. You appear to be making progress. Books are coming to fruition and there will be updates re therapy through the blog etc. It is not always apparent to readers because I do not describe a session with the doctors, but you can see elements of the therapy in certain articles which convey things which I have learned etc through this process.
Hi HG!
I have made some progress. My triggers only happen a couple times a month and it’s the unexpected ones that get me. I have been practicing breathing and relaxing techniques.
I love the totem idea. I have been looking around my house for one that I would like to use.
I looked at my exes Pinterest ( I know I shouldn’t but I’m working on it) and it brought on the tears because she had pins about how she will always love me. I immediately thought of the totem and how it was all my emotional thinking.
I re read your article Coterie last night because I am interested in what you do to attract your coterie or lieutenants. It’s easier for me to see what you would say to someone that you are trying to seduce but are there key phrases or conversations that should alarm me that someone is just trying to draw me into their chaos. I would appreciate and clues HG.
This really has me confused. I don’t know what’s and what’s not appropriate in the friend category.
I’m trying to pay attention and I don’t know if I’m overthing thinks now.
Thanks and looking forward to part 2
You should arrange a consultation with me, I have a specific approach which assists you with how to deal with people once you have acquired knowledge and understanding about our kind which assists you in building your logic defences and distinguishing the people you engage with.
That sounds intriguing.
Your response regarding the mother’s emotions dealing with a hurt child shows your awareness in both examples. Logical….she know the child is hurt and as a mother she should care for him. Its not exactly what you said but, similar.
Using the same logic with an IPPS, you know your behaviour is hurting her, your role is to care for her. Can your logical thinking override the need for fuel? I am not sure if I worded that correctly.
Also, the question is specific to your awareness I am not that dilussional to think it is possible with all narcs. 😊
Thanks HG
Fair question Yolo. I understand the point you are making however
1. The logic that I see I am hurting somebody is inapplicable. The reason is that I am unmoved by hurting someone. There is no downside for me.
2. Therefore whilst you would correctly expect that I may be able to assert logic over my emotional thinking (which manifests in a different way to yours and does so far, far less often) this is not a situation where the logic would apply.
Hi Snow White
Nice to hear that you are well and venturing out more. It sounds like you have questions about your new friend and this is a great article to address that. Separating your emotional and logical thinking can be hard because you dont want to discount everyone and become a hermit, but on the other hand you must watch for those red flags and question with your logical thinking when you feel something that is a bit off or makes you feel uncomfortable. Hope your physical injuries have healed and allowed you back to your physical health routine. Nice to see you commenting again.
NA
Hello NA!!!
How’s Canada? Do u have your fur lined bras and panties out yet?
Glad to hear from you too. I do miss all the conversations with the regular commenters.
I have been out a lot more and have met many new people. I found it hard to remain friends with the people that I was friends with BN (before the Narc). I am just different and they don’t seem to get it or get who I am now.
You are exactly right about not wanting to discount people to early. I find that I’m deciphering every little detail about the simplest things. I don’t know what’s considered normal with my new friends.
I don’t know how much is too much to text, is it ok to call people, are they allowed to hug me, give me gifts, pay for my dinner, it just goes on for me.
And I do notice some red flags but I try to think what I would do and some of those things I would because I am just a nice person.
I just am wondering what people always want from me. And then trying to think what’s appropriate and not is another big one for me.
I need a chart to follow. Lol
This article is really going to help with the two ways of thinking.
I am almost healed and back to my training. Thanks for asking. It’s been a long five months.
Being healthy has helped with my CPTSD.
What have you been doing?
Muah NarcAngel. Always love your posts. I saw a meme the other day. When others saw red flags we saw a parade. Ha.
Hi Snow, it’s Lisa (UK) nice to hear your doing ok . Maybe have a consultation with HG for any red flags with your new friend . Take Care
Hey snow white!! Its so good to see you back!! Youve been missed but i understand people take breaks or just read. Im glad to hear youre healing and moving on. Its so important on here to see the people who have made it to the other side and how they did it. Its very motivating! The fact you looked at your exes pinterest and didnt contact her bravo!! Logical thinking says…it doesnt matter if she really does love me still shes got a personality disorder that was so toxic to me and my life. Thats the fact.
Have you been able to go to the gym agajn? I know you werent able to for awhile. I know its a great outlet to feeling well. Its great to see you back and hope to see more of you! 🤗😘
Hello narc affair!
Thanks and I have seen that you are still around here. Good for you that you are still taking in all the knowledge that HG has.
I have been trying to live and it’s hard work and it takes up all my time. Lol
I do have to repeat phrases in my head like that:
“She has a personality disorder”
“I can never go back with her”
“I can’t contact her”
It does help somewhat.
And my logically thinking does know that everything that she does to try and bait me will just suck me back into the game again.
It’s hard now to explain to everyone on the outside how it is to move through my day and interact with all the new people. They are sick of me asking a million questions. I feel like I’m a five year and don’t know how the world works.
I am back at the gym full time which is great. I feel fantastic and my goal next year is to compete in a bodybuilding contest. I have to stay occupied and busy. Lol… But this is also where I have met most of my new friends and that’s where I got myself in trouble the last time.
I spend a lot of time observing.
How are you doing? How is your narc treating you?
Are you still in your marriage?
Intimacy is still terrible for me and I hate it. I can’t tell if it’s the sensory, my confusion with my sexuality, or still the CPTSD but I know my ex messed up this area for me big time. And I don’t know how to fix it.
Sending you hugs
Hi snow white…I think you should keep the goals coming! Definitely enter the bodybuilding contest! Its ok youve met friends at the gym but just keep your narc alert on. Its normal to feel nervous afyer having gone thru what you have. One foot in front of the other and stay busy! When i get in a rut i now make myself do things and i always feel better afterwards. Im learning as i go.
Thats a tough situation with the intimacy i can relate bc im in the same situation with my hubby. Its strange our situations mirror each other. My hubby i think is asexual which years ago when i met him i didnt know what that was. Ive read up on it and it describes him pretty much describes him. Were both straight but the asexual aspect is a bit like a different sexuality in that its different. I can sympathise it must be very difficult to sort thru your feelings in this regard and probably a lot of confusion and guilt. Just remember youre a good person with a good heart ❤
Im still with my narc but im celebratkng baby steps. Ive tried no contact and breaking away but ive not been able to do it. I guess hes not done the worst yet and when that day comes then i will. In the meantime im trying a different approach of filling my life up with new things and changing thought patterns which have been empowering me more. Its really helped with panicky moments.
Im still married and striving to work on my marriage. Im taking more focus off the narc relationship and putting it back into my marriage. Like you its been difficult to rekindle the marriage but im definitely going to try my best!
What are some of your goals for yourself aside from the bodybuilding? I think goals are very motivating towards positive change 🙂
Hi Snow White, nice to see you are back! 🙂
Hi E.B.!
I missed everyone here and there comments.
It’s been a lot to return to work, finishing up my PT appointments, training, and trying to have a new social life. Lol
How’s everything with you?
Hi Snow White,
I knew you were taking a break and you would come back! 🙂 It is nice to hear that you continue training, that you have returned to work and that you are trying to meet new people. I agree with NarcAngel that you have to watch for red flags, especially when someone makes you feel uncomfortable with too much attention and when they go too fast or when you cannot put a finger on it, why something does not feel right. Consulting HG is very important before getting ensnared by a narcissist again.
I am striving one day at a time, thank you for asking. I was able to put on some weight and I feel better now. To control my emotional thinking I am using one of those grip master hand exercisers as a totem. It is better than squeezing a therapy ball, at least for me, although reading these articles is the best way to come back to reality and to avoid being gaslighted.
HG. My my my. Aren’t you the generous one? Totem solution? Could be a trap. We will be easier to spot if we are walking around holding a silver spinning top like the one from Inception! Of course it’s true that our relationship is really a dream, is it not?
I see another name change. The relationship is real, it is based on illusion.
Do you see who we really are even though we may change our WordPress name? I hope so.
I do.
I know you see my email so I thought I would entertain you a bit and play upon the assumption you hold of me being a mid ranger. See everything I do is all about you!
The basis is fake, true, but I make reference to the movie inception because of the relationship being a dream within a dream. Empath dreams of ideal perfect love. Narcissist dreams of ideal perfect love. Narcissist is disgusted by empaths falling for a fake persona and thus turns dream into a nightmare just so they can feel a contrast. Empath then fights to get dreamy relationship back. Both narcissist and empath are in a relationship but with their own reality or perception of what the relationship is or should be. So really a dream of an ideal relationship that neither side can achieve.
Empath = Disney Princess 👸🏻
Narc = Prince Charming 🤴with Freddy Krueger, Michael Meyers, Damian underlying or Prince Alarming if you will…lol! Do you not want me to comment?
HG,
You are quick to call us out on changing our names in a subtle. I laugh out loud…I keep a pic of my son with his kids. Looking at those precious faces definitely. I would use this really pretty garden stone. Not the best idea because if my emotions win I might have a broken window 😂😂 just kidding logic would kick in the thought of paying up to 1k to repair.
Feeling silly.
The narcissist is like a cookie. My emotional thinking wants the cookie. It smells so good. Just one cookie can’t hurt.
My logic says what about heart disease, diabetes and weight gain. What about that exercise program you have been following. All that you gained so far.
My emotional thinking kicks in their just jealous. I’m not afraid of the future. I am living in the moment. I’m gonna eat the cookie. I deserve the cookie. Matter of fact maybe I’ll have one of each.
And once again the con artists wins.
Darn emotional thinking gets me every time.
Great article! Thank you!
My logical side says eat the cookie and go to the gym later….im in trouble.
This is excellent. Thank you, HG.
loveyourselfnowgirl– great name. great article. goso sounds cool. and like the “obvious” response. i find it difficult too. timely article. and all the potential emotional landmines to navigate. my ET cons me into thinking ET is who i am. and without it, i am a robot. NO w/out it (or more specifically, without regulating it) i am slave to it, victim of it and martyr’d to the results. :/
I have been away from here.
I am going around in cirles.
My emotional reasoning have me completely under control.
And the wounds are getting deeper and deeper.
And his deceits greater.
I am totally deluded.
HG, I am struggling with this. I do not feel that it is my emotions that keep me going back. I do not feel sorry for him. For so long I’ve often thought “I hope he fails” in everything he does. I do not feel love for him. Maybe in the beginning but he destroyed that many years ago. I just feel an addiction. Its like I have to watch the train wreck. I have always been the person in his life that he’s had no problems showing his true self to. He tells me of his abuse of other sources and he relies on me to confide in. Every bit of drama in his life he feels the need to tell me about and I soak it in like a sponge. It’s like I crave the information because it gives me a better understanding of who he is. The boundaries with us have always been very very thin. The guy literally had the best of both worlds with me….i do not see this as emotional thinking on my part. Am I wrong? Or is there another aspect that keeps someone like me in a relationship like this?
I do love the idea of a totem. That is something I can relate to in my healing process. I believe healing is more of a logical process than an emotional one.
“It’s like I have to watch the train wreck” – no you do not and that is your emotional thinking which is keeping you engaged. Recognise that, build your logic defences and remain no contact.
You’re bloody fantastic HG !
I’ve learned a lot of this from you already. But this helps provide real clarity of thought. More, more, more……
Thank you. I have decided my totem will be a dog toy because that is all I have been to each and every narc asshole i’ve been removing from my life for the past ten years. Now I’m down to the been-tolerating-them-for-decades bunch. Time to get rid of all of them once and for all.
Dear HG, my best trainer
Merci
😙
I needed it so much!
I mean- some new teaching from you.
I broke NC, but I was pretty neutral, I guess…
My Greater Elite told me at the end, he doesn’t want to talk with me such a superficial way.
“We have to talk about real life.”(To keep control?)
Anyway…
TIME FOR GOSO!
P.S. Is that article from your new book?
More!More!More!
Mother: I love wealth and my quality of life more than my children.
Is that emotional thinking, HG?
Need context.
Excellent article. Timely as I was missing my ex yesterday. What am I really missing though? A reptile void of emotion or conscience or remorse. Looking forward to GOSO-2. I need all the reinforcement I can find. You are helping me unscramble my mind, heart and soul. Thank you so much HG.
Thanks HG, I badly needed this. I’m curled up in my office in tears and so much pain. Then I checked to see what you have for us today and it was GOSO. It’s been four months of daily reading you and following everything you say to the latter. I’ve stayed GOSO these four months but it’s the hardest and most painful thing I’ve ever done. This year has been emotionally grueling, sometimes I just want to sleep and not wake up. This experience totally crippled me. But I think about how far I’ve come and know that the worst is behind me. If I’ve survived this, I really feel I can survive anything. Thanks again for all you do. Thanks for giving us strength, courage and sunshine. Sincerely, Roju.
Roju,
I could have written your post except I am one week NC. I was 5 months until I broke that streak though. Everything you describe is how I am feeling. The pain is unbearable and I too wish to sleep and never wake up. Stay strong, my friend. I am here and hurting too.
Dear Gabbanzobean, I tried to reply under your kind message but couldn’t. I hope you see this. Thank you your thoughtful and heartwarming message. It put a smile on my face. You’ve always struck me as loving and considerate. I often look for your comments and it’s a delight to ‘talk’ to you.
I’m so sorry that you are in excruciating pain. We are the only ones that know the depth of our despair. The pain cannot be described, no words can accurately capture it. I don’t know which is more painful : being with him or being without him.
There are days that breathing and functioning is almost impossible. You just want to die or for the world to come to an end. I prayed for death at some point, such was/is the anguish. I’ve been through some rough patches in life but this shook me to my foundation.
I’m actually surprised I’m alive. The only difference right now is that nobody is treating me poorly but it doesn’t make the pain any less.
Another source of pain is that I genuinely loved and liked him with my spirit, soul, heart and body.
And I know you do too, that is why it’s so hard to let go. What you feel is not fickle. The truth is that I don’t believe I’ve done NC for four months. It’s a miracle.
G, don’t be too hard on yourself because you broke NC. Daily, I think about breaking it too but when I think about how he would gloath and be so arrogant about my crawling back, I cringe. In fact, I can see the smirk on his face if I go back, he won’t be gracious.
Take care of yourself my friend- eat well and excercise if you can. Sleeping well right now is tough but try. Surround yourself with people that care about you, it may not do much but it’s better than being alone in misery. Talking about it to my best friends about it helped a bit. As for obesssing, I don’t know the cure for that because he’s on my mind all the time even when I’m busy. I keep fantasizing about him showing up and doing amazing things. I really don’t know what’s wrong with me.
In all of these, one thing I’m trying to do is to forgive myself. I keep asking myself why I allowed someone treat me like that. I’m very angry with myself, angry with him and sad at the same time.
I read somewhere that going NC is having compassion on oneself. ‘Our compassion is incomplete if we don’t show it to ourselves.’
Apart from reading everything HG, checking for pins and posts on narcissim, self respect, dignity, boundaries, self esteem, no contact , etc on Pinterest has been soothing on many days.
It’s okay if he matters to you now, he won’t matter forever. One day at a time.
The day will come when you may still love him but you will able to do without him. I’m looking forward to us not feeling anything for them.
Stay strong, you’ve done NC before, you will do it again. There is no other way.
If you want to talk about it some more, I’m here. I really want us to laugh about this in the future and we must give it what it takes.
Hugs.
Please keep going!
I did not speak with my Narc for 20+ days, then said hello and by the end of the week was chatting to him again. On the 2nd day he was already testing me by taking long pauses in between replies, I want to go G.O.S.O so badly and need to be more disciplined 🙁
5 months is fantastic, no matter how bad you feel right now. Be proud of yourself, I surely am.
Roju….yes I saw your comment to me. No worries. You have accurately described my feelings on the matter. I replied in detail on HG’s recent article/poll of how no contact was breached. I summarized my daily feelings of how it is going for me right now. As much as it sucks it is nice to know I am not alone. Thank you.
And yeah, how I am getting through each day remains a miracle to me. Fake it until you make it right?
While I was still mired in the post-discard devastation, I was fortunate enough to have a long conversation with the narc’s ex-wife, who escaped him 30 years ago. She had seen a therapist while gathering the courage to leave him — fortunately for her, a therapist who recognized him as a narcissist. This therapist gave her a mantra to use every day: “Let go of the dream” … to remind herself that while the relationship had been real to her, it hadn’t been real to him, and that the man she loved didn’t really exist. HG’s suggestion of using a totem reminded me of this mantra, which was also effective for me as a way to banish emotional thinking.
I wish I could talk to my mid ranger’s wife….
She has no idea who I am though, but oh how I wish I could talk to her.
What would you say? Im sure she knows full well he still cheats. She possibly found out with another of his sources that hed been cheating recently. These narcs hide what they dont want us to know very well.
Shes one woman probably of many.
She probably stays for the same (or similar) reasons I wish he was mine.
And here I am 8 days of silence. It will be a long lifetime….LOL.
Gabbonzobean
Did you acheive your goals in meeting with him?
Narc Angel…
Nope. Goals went out the window as soon as he hugged me. I became putty. 😔
That is what most of us have felt at some point. I know you hear it over and over but “it does get easier”. Each day away is one day closer to freedom. Believe me, I know! Read HG’s article “GOSO One” over and over and over and over. ..
Gabbanzo, it was a big step in my recovery. It happened because I already had a friendly relationship with her. They have a daughter and grandchildren together, so I used to see her at family gatherings. He referred to her as The Bitch, but I always found her to be nice. Now she and I are The Bitches — hahaha!
Gab,
What can you tell her you think she already don’t know?
If his wife is on the blog, do you think she thinking the same thing as you are?
This post is for you and all of us on here. We need to practice this and then later we can share with others with the intentions of helping them.
Peace and Healing
I always wanted to contact his wife too and find out if she knew what he was. I wanted to send her articles about everything. I never met the woman but I liked her. The more he put her down, the more I liked her. I was always asking him to tell me something GOOD about her. He would come up with some lame thing like this one “she cooks a good meal”. Immediately after saying this he put in “but I hate it when she won’t let me in to help”. Always a “but”. After 22 years of being married to him, she simply must know there is something wrong with him and has looked it up. . . right?!
Yolo/Narc Affair….not to tell her or say anything about me. But to ask her questions. I so very much want to see the world through her eyes, specifically with him and how he acts, what he says and does and everything. Perhaps this is my perspective seeing as how I am not only DLS but LD as well. I do not see him and interact with him in his day to day life absent for the visits we have had together. Think “fly on the wall mentality”….I hope this makes sense.
Same for me
She is either very brainwashed due to 10 years together or very naive.
Hi fiona…or codependant and afraid to let go.
New article…and soooo powerful! You are something, Tudor. Very important and crucial subject. Very right and useful advises. Very helpful. Congratulations and respect. Wow.
Wow! This is spot on! I find this incredibly interesting. The Ex Narc actually tried to use emotional thinking versus logical thinking as a way to Hoover me back. He is what you described as the “greater narcissist”. Once he realized I figured out what he was, he fully admitted it to me. And then he tried to tell me that I was too hung up on love and emotions. That emotions and love are fickle and change. That instead I should focus on logic and needs. He said that he needed me and that was stronger than love and that I just needed to get over the illusion of love and be more logical. If I were logical I could see that he gave me everything. He gave me every material thing you could think of, an awesome home ( he bought my dream home and used it to Hoover me back) he made a lot of money, he took me on trips, and he promised he would always continue to do those things if I just would stay with him and continue to be the fuel for him that I had been in the beginning before I realized that he didn’t give a fuck about my feelings. To him that arrangement made logical sense. Who needs to have their feelings validated? Who needs self-esteem? Why would I not want to be somebody’s property instead of a human being? I left him and he didn’t allow me to have anything. I have had to rebuild my whole life from nothing. He still hoovers. I find it to be disgusting and pathetic . He may have every material thing you can think of, but he will never have me again. I would rather be me than him any day. At this point I don’t have to rely on my logical thinking, because my emotional thinking towards him does not want him anymore either!
Well!!!!
What a brilliant totally superb article.
And this is exactly why I stay here.
This is one for the naysayers..
Because this clearly gives practical and unrivalled guidance.. it’s steers a person onwards.
This is the work that saves Futures and yes I will say it lives if heeded.
Bloody Marvellous.
I’m going to look for something as a totem now.
Brilliant and very familiar HG!
I’m looking forward to GOSO 2. I obviously hadn’t reached zero impact for the long term. I wish the Supernova lasted indefinitely.
I really appreciate this. I realized I have a pretty serious guilt issue. I have a work cell I’ve shut off during NC, but now every time I turn it on to get my messages, my hands start to shake… when I asked myself why (and was polite enough to answer myself), I realized it was because I’m fearful I’ll have a message from the narcissist – and worried that it’ll be a sob story that makes me feel guilty – so the anticipation of that was making me really anxious.
That’s a problem! I’m going to do this technique. I have work to do.
It will work. Some days it will be hard, but with continued practice you will retrain your thoughts. You start doing it with the narc then you will realize it happens naturally in other situations.
H.G. is a blessing in disguise. Some therapist will withhold information like this to keep us stuck paying fees.
Thanks, Yolo! Yes, it was mighty good of HG to share this. This technique is empowering. It’s brain discipline, and it’s very peaceful to know you can retrain your brain to be more kind to yourself (for me, my emotional thinking makes me feel I always having to help others when sometimes it’s not the right thing – I sometimes need stronger boundaries because I can get taken advantage of). This will help me in my other relationships as well.
This is a really good article, HG. It reminds me of conversations with my FIL. He’s the one who broke me of my emotional thinking 25-30 years ago. He tried your approach with looking logically at each false assumption that had me mired. Didn’t work. I just couldn’t stand the thought of not being as nice to my husband as possible- no matter how much it hurt me.
He gave up and changed tactics and used my religious feelings to make me realize that my staying and enabling my husband was preventing him from learning the life lessons God wanted him to learn. He had me read and study a lot, too. My MIL even supplied a sort of talisman like you suggest. Whenever my emotional thinking (and they used that term too) started I was to say to myself, “Let go and let God.” She even got me stickers and a plaque that said it to remind me.
Sure did work for me!
Superb article, HG! Outstanding! Yours is the voice of logic and reason!
How do you understand our emotional thoughts/feels when you have none ? My logical thinking has kicked in. It seems ( Iam suspicious of words) & words take a back seat to actions now as never before. I just want to understand..
I have heard so many reasons given by people why they cannot do this or that (not just in the context of a narcissistic relationship) and is at odds with how I operate. I realised this was their emotional thinking clouding them. I have also learned about this a part of what I do professionally – it was aimed at helping people separate emotional responses from logic so they could do what had to be done – most of it didn’t apply to me because I do it anyway. Add to that I observe and listen with regard to my victims and those that share their experiences and it all adds to my understanding.
HG, this explanation makes me wonder if you are a therapist of some sort as your profession. The way you explain things sure seems like it sometimes. It would be ironic. A wolf in sheep’s clothing perhaps. Just one girl’s observation.
Reminds me of my father teaching me how to shoot. He always said that thinking gets you killed. You have to practice until everything about shooting is completely automatic. It’s all just a process. Probably why we have the saying, “Shoot first and ask questions later.”
Very helpful. Once again, HG has come to save the day.
So wouldn’t we be at risk for becoming narcissist ourselves? Emotions are good. I mean I know all about wise mind.. So I guess there needs to be an in between. Only using logic when dealing with these heavy emotions from a narc?
No. You do not become a narcissist in adulthood, nor do you become a narcissist from using logic. You must use logic rather than emotional thinking with regards to GOSO. Logic is useful in many other areas also and sometimes emotional thinking, in other areas, will operate with logic. For example, you are a parent and you see your child is hurt, your emotional response is “I must help him”. Logic would also tell you that this is a child who is vulnerable and in pain and therefore requires assistance. You as parent and closest person to that child (proximately and as a relative) means you are best placed to provide that assistance.
@gabbanzobean or a life or career coach 😉
Perfect timing. Thank you HG
HG,
great article and very helpful insight. I really love your writing and how it puts words to what we all have been through here in some sense.
I would say that my emotional thinking used to come up with the excuse of “But I still love him” most of the time. Just that. Love. I was an expert at being my own worst enemy in my relationship. He needn’t do much at all actually. He punished me when I somehow displeased him, he praised me when I acted the way he wanted me to. I quickly learned the rules, put up my own bars in my own cage, let him seize the power by isolating and manipulating me. Of course the hard logic would say that it wasn’t love at all, it was a play set upon a premeditated stage by ways of the outcome for me; I do know that now, but it was oh such a familiar play for me, I’ve watched it thousands of times in my childhood, that’s what love is made of for me. Now I do try to think otherwise. I try to see it as a Greek Tragedy instead, premeditated of course, but bringing me katharsis (in Athens right now so the metaphorical allusion seems about right), cleaning me, healing me of my initial wound.
And I did escape after he abused me, and I did go no contact, but somewhere deep inside my emotional thinking still prevails and it misses him. I’m not going to let it win though.
Thanks so much again for your informative and spot on articles!
You are welcome. What do you think of Athens, I was somewhat disappointed when I visited last year?
Well, I’m quite mixed up about Athens. I used to live here. After escaping my narcissistic environment at home I studied here and stayed on for six years before moving back home again. Since then I don’t really go back that often, I haven’t been here for seven years now. My emotional thinking would say that I love Athens because it was here I grew up in a way, it’s a part of who I am, I still feel happy listening to Greek songs, I still long for its simple food; my cool hard logic though now wonders how I could stand this city at all for that long. The traffic, the pollution, the cigarette smoke, the deafening noise. The old parts of Athens are beautiful though. But I guess revisiting the past is not the path for me right now.
How did you find it disappointing?
I found it to be very dirty.
Everyone seems to love San Francisco, but I found it to be dirty too. (I know that has nothing to do with Athens) 😄
Paraphrasing the old saying –
Emotional thinking is a bitch so learn how to f*** it !
Did I ever need this today. Thank you.
You are welcome.
Excellent
Thank you.
Excellent!!!!
Thank you.
Yes!! I love every single word in this article !
Thank you ! 👏👏👏
You are welcome.