The Rules of Ex Club – No. 5
21 thoughts on “The Rules of Ex Club – No. 5”
Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)
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I heard this about his wife all the time and I really believed him. Crazy, frigid, terrible mother, bitch. It wasn’t until I found HG that I realized none of it was true.
Mr. Tudor
Mine labelled me as having mental issues and being unfaithful because she used to spy my phone and discovered photos of girls. I used to watch photos of girls ’cause my narc punished me without sex for more than a year. We were 4 years living together. I decided to watch photos rather than being unfaithful to her. She was the unfaithful one.
Dear Mr Tudor,
Any relationship with any kind of narcissist results in mental health issues!
^ 100% ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
My N wasn’t a greater and I was never officially an ex. BUT, oh, poor him, I was having mental health issues and he just had to be so patient and caring with me.
So much bovine excrement, I’m surprised there wasn’t a cows anus in the middle of his face.
So what does it mean if you’re described in all three ways? It started with whore/slut and that continues to this day as he’s told people I’m having affairs (I’m not and never have, but he has). That segued into me being abusive and a sadist because I became “hostile” and “defensive” every time he called me a whore/slut or accused me of cheating. Then at the worst of it, when I felt like I barely even remembered my own name, he would tell me that he’s an “expert” in psychoanalysis because he’s seen therapists for decades and I should come to him and him only (not my own therapist or even books) and he would help guide me to shed my “ego” and become enlightened like him. And now he spends most of his time watching youtube videos about narcissists because he’s building his case that that’s what I am. Ironically it was his accusation against me that I was a narcissist that led me to find this blog and other resources and finally opened my eyes. Does this show awareness on his part that he knows what he is wants me to know or just projection?
It will depend on which school he belongs to Vera, but it most likely projection.
Thanks HG. I think he’s a mid-range. The more I observe the more I agree that it’s all just projection, and not indicative of any actual self-awareness.
I am dealing with a rare breed of animal . My narc is a combination of mental illness drug abuse I have never met a character such as this in my life. You never know what to expect. It’s like peaking from behind a curtain. You don’t know whether your going to be harmed or kissed. It’s just horrible what you go through with these monsters. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall when he was growing up. It makes you wonder about the people that raised them.
I was labeled with that’s the Bipolar kicking in. I am thankful for the protective mechanism God has given me . I would not still be here if not for the GRACE OF GOD.. Dealing with THE KIND nearly destroyed me.
Ha funny!! It very well may happen after being entangled with a narcissist. Trying to decipher why they do what they do, will make one insane.
Indeed true.
After dealing with a narcissist.
My dad used to call my mom ‘crazy’ in front of pple. I would often be in the room. It used to make me feel v sad. But if he is a narc, he’s def not a greater. He has alot of heated fury. He erupts any time.
My ex-narc was a mid-midranger, but very creative with his labels: his ex-wife was “flawed”, this ex-girlfriend before that was chronically depressed (duh!) and his son had ADD. The poor boy was just sick and tired of his father constantly criticizing him.
After the last discard, I did have mental issues.
Depression that I couldn’t get out of. I’d walk around feeling as if I didn’t exist, in a dream. I would break into tears for no/any reason. I couldn’t think straight, function, I’d lost weight. Id hear a voice, realise it was my own but felt no connection to it. I didn’t was to keep living.
I don’t know if what I experienced is PTSD. But it was as a bad place mentally for me and I had to get professional help.
So he’d be right about mental issues – if he had the insight to be able to think what his effect his abusive actions has on me, alas he’s too busy with his own self pity and being the victim for that.
Dear Mr Tudor,
Any relationship with any kind of narcissist results in mental health issues!
Well said Bubbles!
This was an Upper mid ranger imperiously claiming that she was both a trained counsellor and grief counsellor. All BS of course. She always spoke about others under the guise of care, but was unable to exhibit a shred of empathy. Her ex who left and divorced her, was labelled as a manic depressive and she was the noble long suffering Mother Teresa for putting up with his illness and helping him.
Her ‘go to’ label with most of her relatives regardless of they whether estranged or not. was ‘bipolar’. When anyone asked her what the actual symptoms of bipolar were she would evade answering and adroitly change the topic.
Her method of labelling was to systematically always drip feed information to her audience. A very brief alluding to it one week in conversation, then there would be another brief reference to it some months later. Always followed by a sentence implying how saintly she was for putting up with it.
As for everyone else she was somewhat more creative and had a plethora of labels. It didn’t matter whether they were friend or foe, she labelled them. Labels we heard were brain tumour, under psychiatric care, schizophrenic, brain cancer, depression, grief stricken due to bereavement, addiction to either alcohol/drugs/ prescriptive medicine/gambling, mentally retarded and eating disorders .
Her go to label with children was ‘ throwing terrible temper tantrums’ due to anger issues, grief, autism or allergies to food or prescriptive medicine. But she of course loved to tell us how she sagely managed them due to her extensive training as a counsellor.
It’s staggering the amount of bunkum that they dream up to try and make themselves out to be a decent person.
If its true its bc the narc more than likely made them that way!
I think if you do have a disorder it gets worse after dealing with them.
My hypothesis is that my nhusband is between a Mid-Greater Narcissist, and his default end of argument to being right was to label me as having a ‘mental illness’.
Ha, ha! I saw this coming!! Mine definitely described me this way! I ended up just agreeing, yes I’m crazy, deal with it!