The Narcissistic Icicles – No. 3


34 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Icicles – No. 3

  1. ava101 says:

    My mother asked me for all my passwords last year – in case I died.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      See, she does care !

      1. SN says:

        Who’s we?
        [You and your belly; all GEs; all Narcs; all Narcs and all Empaths; all people…]
        I just don’t kniw who to think about now, so it’d be helpful if you shared more insight, HG.

        But I’ll go with ‘people in general’ for now.

      2. ava101 says:

        Yes, including caring about my bank accounts, so they would not be deserted.

        1. SN says:

          Maybe give her wrong passwords or order a two-factor authentication. Unless she’s already tapped into your phone as well?
          Then change the number!

          But who knows, maybe she plans a big suprise gift for you!

  2. Persephone In Sunlight says:


    This has been my experience, too!
    I knew there was something wrong with him, but I didn’t know what it meant, nor the scope of it.

    Mine knew he was dying, and kept up the lies on his deathbed till he could utter no more words.

    And, he tried to strangle me at that time. More than once, while I was caring for his cancer ridden self. He didn’t want me to live without him.

    The money I knew was there, was gone. Children fathered with other women while he bragged what a faithful husband he was, etc, etc.
    More and more truth has come out since he died. I don’t know where I’d be without HG and this community.

    Many people still don’t believe me, many didn’t then, but, “whatever”,
    I’m safe and free, and intend to stay that way..

    Now I am mostly very happy, but still curious, and sure that I don’t want to be entangled with another narcissist.

    How are you doing?


    1. H. says:

      I am doing well thanks for asking Perse. It’s been a surreal experience. I believe that I knew him best, and I seem to be the center piece for everyone putting pieces together.

      I read your experience, he tried to choke you…Oh my. I was threaten to be choked out at the end too.

      I get some satisfaction in knowing I was right about everything I accused him of, and of course he denied all of them, declaring me jealous and insecure. Swore on his children’s life he was telling the truth.

      So how do I feel now? I am trying to remove myself from the worms. I think that no matter how much I learn of his true life, I will never understand it.

      I want answers, but as an empath, I am having trouble with this death thing. I got it when he was alive, but the dynamic of death, and all that it has revealed, has triggered all the old memories and my old behaviors…which is emotionally cycling.

      I am getting glimpses of freedom….I just need to stop answering my phone to hear more of his cheating lying ways that everyone seems to want to share with me.

      Thanks again for sharing your story. It made me feel better.

      1. Persephone In Sunlight says:

        Glad it helped some. It will get better.


  3. narc affair says:

    More like….how dare you die on me and take away my fuel!

  4. LYNN says:

    lol HG if I now hated you on the verge of my death that would be great retribution i would have on my death bed, especially if you were now old and ugly, less sharp intellect and lacking in the charisma you have relied on and no longer attractive enough to gain any more good supply, if your only new supply would be an old and ugly woman and i had aged well. I could die smiling at you imagining your emptiness to come.
    Reality I would love you still so much despite your years of cruelty so maybe a smile would mean I was thinking of the peace my death would afford me.
    If you cant get good new supply what would you do? without fuel what would happen to you? would you be forced to face your inner self and all the terror that musters?
    If you couldn’t deal with that would you commit suicide to escape it? or would you just drown yourself with alcohol to stop you thinking or drugs to reshape your mind but then your decognitive state from those substances heighten the terrors and render you more unable to disassociate from the terror. sounds pretty vial to me.
    Have you thought of an answer to your old age, do you plan to commit suicide when you loose your attractiveness and cant get good supply anymore, of course you might loose that opportunity if it happens suddenly ie stroke or heart attack where your rendered incapacitated to take your own life.
    Have you written an agreement where you have a leethel injection in these circimstances?
    Of course dementia may be a release but on the other hand if maybe those dark thoughts from inside are all you have left when cognitive function fails you and that would be a living hell.
    Maybe fear of old age is the only thing that might make a very intelligent narc try and make the change to be normal and face those inner demons.
    I guess you could get a very younger women who probably wont die before you but then to keep her for your old age you wouldn’t be able to play those nasty narc games anymore for fear of loosing her in your old age.
    So you’d have to get a reasonably young one but not too young maybe the odds are she will live longer than you, but the balance of power may change as you age markedly older than her.
    All means that at some point you will have to curtail your behaviour and be short of fuel and face your inner self.
    Oh dear it doesn’t bode well, I hope for your kind you they find the secret of eternal youth so you never age if you can afford it.
    Your thoughts HG?

    1. SN says:

      I am not sure if that is what HG would agree on calling his kind, but a secret to eternal youth has been reportedly uncovered by some powerful and rich people in this world. So, there might be hope!

      If you ask me – not relieving the past like a favourite movie helps a lot to look younger than the age metric states.

      Also, I don’t think HG would have trouble finding some woman to accompany him in his old age – plenty out there who’d happily sell away their souls for a little bit of comfort and luxury.

      I am not sure HG would like that much, but somehow I don’t see him alone in his olden days. I guess, we will have to wait and see – if HG cares to tell us then.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Accurate observations SN. I have addressed the “how will you cope when you are old’ points many times and I accept that some of our kind will indeed struggle (and there are two articles in that vein) but I will not.

      2. Mary says:

        HG, is the reason you will not struggle to find fuel because you have plenty of charm to draw others in even as you age? I’m going to assume you have financial stability and that can be attractive to a young woman, especially if she thinks you will leave her your wealth.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Those are two major factors, yes.

          1. SN says:

            Is that enough, HG, to make you happy?

          2. HG Tudor says:

            We don’t do happy.

      3. Somewhere over the rainbow says:

        HG, there is also the possibility that the young woman takes good care of you given the hope she’ll inherit you and you leave all your money to a foundation on your name, as a better…legacy for you.
        Is that a possible scenario?

        I’ll never trust a narcissist again, I was previously accused by some from your kind…I’m not a good “target” (not using those words but poetically ones).

        1. HG Tudor says:

          It is.

    2. K says:

      LYNN, this sums up HG’s perspective about death pretty well.

      HG Tudor
      AUGUST 10, 2017 AT 16:34
      Hello Paula, no I am not. It will come to everyone. When I die it will be when my legacy is secured. I have felt death’s scythe swish by several times and if it happens, it happens. No point fearing it and no point worrying when it does as it will be over.
      If he does not come for me until I much, much older, I will be fired into space in a space suit and watch the world recede as I breath my last, knowing I remain above all that is below me.

      This comment can be located here:

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Thank you Chief Librarian K.

      2. K says:

        My pleasure! It was located in non-fiction and comedy because the last paragraph made me laugh.

      3. Twilight says:

        Ha ha K

        Glad you are the Tudor Librarian

        That last paragraph…..very fitting an end for HG.

        1. K says:

          What better way for a greater elite to let the world know, that even in death, he is above us all. I thought it was a riot.

      4. SN says:


        I might actually prefer to wait for Death to tell me himself – the guy has been around for eons, and knows how to add 2 to 2.
        But HG Ghost is welcome too, if he can behave himself well then!

        1. K says:

          If HG became a ghost, that would give him a whole new level of naughty.

          1. SN says:

            It could be so, K. I guess we’d have to wait and see for ourselves.
            To you it might mean reading his chosen works on every call.
            I don’t know what he could expect from me, though! Drinking tea maybe? I can go with that, as long as I don’t have to put milk in each one of them. Then we can have a preliminary ghost deal, maybe.

          2. K says:

            I think we should go with A Mad Tea-Party like the one in Alice in Wonderland and invite everyone from the blog.

          3. SN says:

            Oh goodie! I’ll put the kettle on! Tell them to bring cookies!

          4. K says:

            Ha ha ha…thank you for my Sunday morning laugh, SN!

      5. Somewhere over the rainbow says:

        Hi K,

        Thank you! Reading what you found from Tudor reminded me of the reason I took this name on the blog.

        “Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high
        And the dreams that you dream of, once in a lullaby
        Somewhere over the rainbow, blue birds fly
        And the dreams that you dream of, dreams really do come true
        Someday I’ll wish upon a star
        Wake up where the clouds are far behind me
        Where trouble melts like lemon drops
        High above the chimney top
        That’s where you’ll find me
        Somewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds fly
        And the dream that you dare to
        Why, oh why can’t I?”

        E.Y. Harburg / Harold Arlen

        Same aims, different reasons (for an empath= freedom, for the narcissist= “watch the world recede as I breath my last, knowing I remain above all that is below me” = superiority/entitlement).

        Hugs K!

        1. K says:

          Somewhere over the rainbow
          Have you listened to Israel Kamakawiwo’ole sing that song? It is so haunting and sad…it makes me all teary eyed and ruins my stoic facade.

          You are right, the empath and the narcissist are very much alike. We are both looking for the same thing, however, we do it in drastically different ways.

          Hugs right back at you!

    3. Madison says:

      Greater narcissists rarely commit suicide. Too messy.

  5. SN says:

    Yes, there is a kind of meditation practice when one would put themselves in the perspective of themselves as a dead person – it is meant to bring about the reflection on what it would mean for the world, surrounding people etc. Pretty much nothing, if you ask me, so feel free in your fantasies!
    Wiseheads say it is more effective when used in the 1st person, rather than 2nd, 3rd or more, though.

  6. H. says:

    Ha….14 days after my narcs gruesome death…the worms are flowing out of the corpse. His death could not control of the unraveling of truth.

    His narcissist mask has been pulled away, exposing a man that no one knew, not even his mother. The lies, the cheating, the financial cheating, continues to unfold weeks after his funeral.

    The scope of his lies and cheating is breathtaking. The number of women he made victims uncountable.

    I am horrified at the depths of his lies to me. I thought I knew the truth and was on to him. Turns out I scraped the tip of the iceberg.

    Only now am I beginning to accept I was truly a victim. I blamed myself for not walking away when I had the weird feeling in my gut, and when my stomach clenched when the red flags waved in my face.

    I am horrified that I was in the presence of pure evil.

    Thank God I am a survivor.

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