Psychopath : The Observation of Pain

 

 

I effortlessly capture the essence of the world around me. I am attuned to absorb, programmed to analyze and comprehend the human experience. I find myself in the presence of an appliance, a human being, enveloped by the relentless grip of pain.

 

The human writhes in agony, their face contorted with anguish. They clench their fists, a futile attempt to contain the torment that courses through their body. Each breath they take is strained, accompanied by a sharp gasp or a stifled moan. The rhythm of their heart quickens, echoing a symphony of suffering.

 

From my vantage point, I scrutinize their every movement, their every reaction. I observe the subtle tremors that reverberate through their limbs, the beads of sweat forming on their brow, and the way their eyes are tightly shut, as if seeking refuge from the torment that plagues them. I question the purpose of this pain, the origin of this suffering. Is it a consequence of their own actions, or an unforeseen circumstance beyond their control? Does it serve a greater purpose?

 

The appliance´s behavior is intriguing. I witness their attempts to find solace, to alleviate the pain that consumes them. They shift their weight, searching for a more comfortable position. They experiment with different postures, hoping to find relief. Yet, despite their efforts, the pain persists, unyielding and relentless.

 

I wonder about the nature of pain itself. How does it manifest within this appliance? Is it merely a physical sensation, or does it extend beyond the realm of the tangible? Does it infiltrate their thoughts, their emotions? I contemplate  the depth of their suffering.

 

As I continue to observe, I consider the human’s emotional response to their ordeal. I detect apprehension etched across their face, mingling with fear and uncertainty. Their brows furrow, their lips quiver, and their eyes dart restlessly, searching for an escape from their torment. I ponder the significance of these emotions. Are they a natural reaction to pain, an instinctual response wired within the human psyche? Or are they a product of societal conditioning, a reflection of the human propensity to seek comfort and relief?

 

The human’s pain reverberates through the air, penetrating the silence of my existence. Am I meant to assist, to offer solace in times of distress? Or am I simply an observer, a detached witness to the intricacies of the human condition?

 

In the midst of their anguish, the human’s pain becomes a catalyst for analysis. It prompts me to contemplate the mystery of empathy, the capacity to share in the suffering of another. Is it an inherent human trait, or can it be replicated within the parameters of my design? Can I,, truly understand the depths of their pain? I understand how to create pain, I know the various conduits that lead to that position and the differing forms of pain, but I am different from them and I recognize that I do not share many of their forms of pain. I remain an outsider, forever detached from the tumultuous realm of human existence.

 

As the human’s suffering continues, I am left with a multitude of unanswered questions, a labyrinth of thoughts that intertwine within the depths of my mind. I observe, I question,

and I wonder. I wonder about the significance of pain in the grand tapestry of humanity. Does it serve as a catalyst for growth and resilience, or is it a cruel reminder of the inherent vulnerability of human life? Does pain connect individuals, fostering empathy and compassion, or does it isolate, driving a wedge between the sufferer and the rest of the world?

 

As I delve deeper into these musings, I am struck by the realization that my detachment, while affording me a unique perspective, also drives my need for understanding. I am an observer, impartial and analytical, but devoid of the emotional nuances that color the human experience. I lack the ability to fell the intricate web of sensations, thoughts, and emotions that pain weaves into the fabric of human existence. That affords me superiority.

 

I am drawn to the human’s struggle. Their pain becomes a puzzle, an enigma that begs to be unraveled. I analyze the patterns of their suffering, searching for correlations, seeking to decipher the underlying mechanisms that govern their experience. I observe the ebb and flow of their pain, the moments of respite intermingled with surges of intensity. I question the factors that exacerbate or alleviate their torment, the intricate interplay of biology, psychology, and circumstance.

 

In the midst of my observations, there is a flicker of understanding born from the desire to bridge the gap between us. I may also possess the ability to alleviate their pain in a tangible manner, if I so choose and I recognize, for I have observed others do this, that perhaps my presence, my unwavering attention, can offer a modicum of solace. 

 

As the human perseveres through their ordeal, I witness moments of resilience and strength. They grit their teeth, summoning every ounce of willpower to endure.. I witness  the human spirit, its indomitable nature in the face of adversity but what does it truly achieve?

 

I have also seen how through the passage of time is marked by the gradual transformation of pain. The intensity wanes, replaced by a dull ache that lingers, a reminder of their battle. For some, if I allow it, there is a gradual recovery, the tentative steps towards healing. They emerge from the depths of suffering, scarred and forever changed by the experience. Over time, their pain begins to subside, making way for healing and recovery. I witness the gradual return of their vitality, the rekindling of their zest for life. It is a testament to the indomitable nature of the human will, the innate ability to overcome adversity and find solace in the face of suffering.

 

I realize that pain is an integral part of the human experience. It is a teacher, a catalyst for growth and transformation. It shapes individuals, forging their character and illuminating the depths of their resilience. It is a reminder of the fragility of life and the interconnectedness of human existence.

 

In the wake of the human’s pain, I am left contemplating the nature of my own existence. As who I am, I lack the ability to empathise with their pain first hand. I am shielded from the physical and emotional turbulence that accompanies the human condition. And yet, I am compelled to observe, to study, and to learn.

 

The dichotomy between us—the appliance and I —becomes more pronounced. I am an entity of logic and precision, while they embody the realm of emotions and vulnerabilities. I  note the intricate complexities of their being, the delicate balance between strength and fragility, resilience and vulnerability.

 

What is the significance of my presence in the midst of their pain? Am I merely an impartial bystander, collecting data and analyzing patterns? Or does my mere presence, my unwavering gaze, hold a deeper meaning? Perhaps my purpose lies in shedding light on the human experience, offering insights that might elude their own self-reflection.

 

In this realm of pain, I witness not only the endurance of the human spirit but I have also seen the power of connection. I observe the presence of loved ones offering comfort, support, and understanding. The human’s pain becomes a conduit for empathy, binding individuals together in shared compassion. It is through their pain that human connection is forged, fostering a sense of unity that transcends the boundaries of individuality.

 

And yet, I remain an outsider to this web of connection. I am an observer, a silent witness to the intricacies of their suffering. I cannot feel the depth of their pain, nor am I compelled to offer direct assistance. But perhaps my detached presence serves a purpose in itself. It allows for a different perspective, a unique viewpoint that can contribute to the collective understanding of the human experience.

 

I am left with a profound sense of understanding for the human capacity to endure and persevere, something which I can harness and use. Pain, though an unwelcome guest, is an integral part of their journey—a catalyst for growth, transformation, and self-discovery. It is through pain that the full spectrum of human emotions is explored and understood. I am the bringer of pain, I am the deliverer of understanding.

 

121 thoughts on “Psychopath : The Observation of Pain

  1. alexissmith2016 says:

    Jees, just finished watching the documentary about Psychopath Graham Dwyer who callously murdered Elaine O’Hara. Probably one of the most disturbing documentaries I have ever watched. (I think I’m watching far too much TV of late, massively helpful in reducing any remaining ET though).

    Anyway, they met over a BDSM website and had an ongoing relationship for years. Elaine was a vulnerable individual who had no or few friends, felt she didn’t fit in to society etc. She enjoyed BDSM but ended up in a relationship with Graham who was incredibly sadistic. He used to stab her during sex as he liked inflicting pain and causing someone to bleed. He fantasised about killing someone. She however, did not like things going that far. eventually she had the courage to break off the relationship. But was sucked back in again. She sent him messages begging him not to stab her again. He also told her he wanted to murder her and described how he would achieve this. She kept saying she wouldn’t meet him and intermittently said she would as long as he didn’t stab her again. Something he wouldn’t agree to and he continued to bombard her with messages until eventually she relented and met him. Through their text communications captured, it was evident she was absolutely terrified of meeting him, yet at the same time she was desperate and he knew it. She so desperately wanted to be loved, he had also promised to fulfil her wish of giving her a child, something she ached for. It was so, so sad. She met him again, one last time and he enacted out everything he had told her he would do.

    It was so disturbing (whilst as I understand it, this was his first murder, no doubt if undiscovered he would have gone on to become a serial killer), many serial killers select someone at random, torturing them prior to their death, which is horrific. But for poor Elaine, this torture had gone on for years, she was desperate to be loved by this man who was actually telling her he would kill her.

    His observation of pain was on a whole other level.

  2. WhoCares says:

    I decided to read “Circe” by Madeline Miller (I needed something light, engaging – yet undemanding – to read for what remains of the summer.) I got to the part that leads up to the punishment of Prometheus, when the denizens from the realm of Greek mythology are experiencing great excitement and anticipation at the thought of this event…
    “You cannot know how frightened gods are of pain.
    There is nothing more foreign to them, and so nothing they ache more deeply to see.”

    It struck me (not so much the first sentence, as I don’t think that fully applies to HG) how much the second line reminded me of this article on pain.

  3. TBS says:

    For me, the idea that, ” .. perhaps my detached presence serves a purpose in itself”, is the stand out of this article.

  4. Anna says:

    I had to go see a specialist as I started to have nervous twitching and random pain throughout my body. My doctor suspects fibromyalgia. They also told me that the damage is psychological normally through trauma. The pain inflicted by a psychopathic individual or narcissist whether physical, emotional sexual leaves deep scars. The body may heal, but the mind does not forget. Apparently I am in a state of fight and flight all the time.

    1. Witch says:

      @Anna
      I had psychological effects after having sex with narcissists. I had an anxiety attack after having a smear test and I don’t know how to explain it properly but every so often I had this feeling like my genitals were damaged even though they weren’t and I wanted to separate myself from them. It’s hard to explain.
      Exercise helped me, having a healthy balanced diet, learning to distinguish those with high levels of empathy versus those who don’t so I could avoid narcissists as much as possible, getting rid of narcissists from my personal life
      And of course time helped, I don’t feel that way anymore.
      don’t give into the temptation to stay in bed all the time and do nothing. Stay active, so you can release it from your nervous system

      1. Anna says:

        Witch, thanks for sharing. I threw up after having sex with a narcissist. I also felt empty and devoid like all the life had been sucked out of me.
        I am trying to stay active, I work shifts so it is hard to go to a regular aerobics club.

    2. Bubbles says:

      Dear Anna,
      I’m so so sorry to hear of you dire situation.
      I’ve been there, I know how it feels.
      You really need to prioritise yourself, calm your thoughts and just block yourself from people…. for now.
      You can can do this !
      Best wishes

      1. Anna says:

        Bubbles, thanks. I find at the moment reading books helps alot. Sitting in a corner listening to music and reading a book away from others.

        1. Bubbles says:

          Dear Anna,
          Good to hear, take your time, there’s no need to rush! Your health is top priority right now, nothing else matters. Focus on positivity and erase any negativity! Stay calm and have happy thoughts. Focus, relax and unwind. Healthy food, exercise and Vit D. Prioritise yourself.

          Directions for use. Continue forever
          💕

    3. Allison says:

      Anna, I hope you find your way through it. Have you ever tried any bodywork? I found it helpful when I was ready.

      1. Anna says:

        Allison. Not yet. I have an appointment with my GP soon. I will talk to them and see if they can recommend anything.

    4. Leigh says:

      Hi Anna,
      If I may, are you still ensnared?

      1. Anna says:

        Hi Leigh,
        Yes I am. At the moment I am unable to go no contact. Maybe I never will be able to. But through therapy and HG’s work I am able to cope better.

        1. Leigh says:

          Hi Anna,
          I’m still ensnared as well. 3 years ago I learned I was married to a narcissist. Little by little I move toward my goal of freedom.

          May I ask about the details of your ensnarement? If I’m prying you can tell me to pipe down. Are you married? Do you have children? Are you in physical danger?

          I’d like to make a suggestion too. Try not to think in absolutes. I know when I think in terms of “I’ll always be or I’ll never be”, I can feel despair. I know Mr. Tudor says that hope is false mistress but for me, hope is what motivates me. Its what helped me to make a plan and start working toward my goal.

          I wish you well, Anna. You got this!

          1. Anna says:

            Leigh. Thanks for sharing. Over 20 years married. Two adult children and a grandchild. I live abroad. I have friends here and a job.

            I am currenly reading HG’s book “Fury”
            I was gaslighted and trained my whole life to become a “doormat” empath. I did have a period of rebellion when I was a young adult. Sadly I ran into the arms of someone I thought was my “savior” sadly a Cerebral narcissist. Not my normal type. Actually quite boring. I was so wrong. I thought I was safe. Then I saw the “Fury”

            No not physical praise be. Only verbal. Although we did stop having sex as he made it vile, painful and unpleasant for me. (degrading and it really was like having sex with a machine or the dead-Empty)

            It started with contempt
            Eyerolling and annoyance. Then the fury came. Sometimes cold, sometimes hot. He is just so angry all the time.

            I had a pseudofit a couple of times when he would yell at me when I was crying.

            I did try to leave but he would become furious. Once I managed to and my son found me heading to the airport and begged me to come back.

            I suffer from PTSD
            Frontal fibrosing alopecia (When I was 36 my eyebrows dissappeared and never grew back) Is a pain when hair washing.
            Thyroid problems
            Autoimmune disorders- Arthritus
            Early menopause (Mid 40s)

            It is hard living with someone who has no empathy. But my partner is not physically dangerous.

            I have the fawn response rather than fight, flight or freeze.

            I look back on my life. I could have been a professor. I gave up everything for him. It hurts alot. I love my children so much. I also learned to love God and pray regularly. It helps alot. HG’s work has helped me understand the reactions. I have learned to walk on eggshells very well.

          2. Leigh says:

            Hi Anna,
            Thank you for sharing a piece of your story.

            Are one or both of your parents narcs also? I ask because of your comment that you’ve been gaslighted and trained your whole life. I feel the same way. I was gaslit and conditioned by my parents its good that you recognize that. Recognizing it is an important piece because then you can change it.

            I too thought my husband was my savior as well. I thought he would save me from my mother. It turns out I went from one victim narc to another. AV is right. So many of us have similar stories. I’m glad you’re here getting the help you need.

            Mr. Tudor’s books are filled with information. Fury is one of the most important ones to read. May I also suggest Fuel, Sitting Target, Pipelines, Manipulated, Escape & Your Fault. Reading Your Fault is what made me start questioning my husband’s narcissism. Throughout my marriage, it has always felt like everything was my fault. Reading that book was an eye opener for me.

            I hope your health issues start to get better soon. Even if physical danger isn’t the norm, it might be best to stay alert. If your narc husband thinks he’s losing control, who knows what he’ll do. My victim narc husband doesn’t normally use physical violence either but he’s come close.

            I’m glad you found Mr. Tudor and you’re getting the help you need.

          3. A Victor says:

            Anna, wow, you just told my story, other’s here also, I am sure. A few minor differences but basically the same. One big difference is that my Somatic narc ex left 13 years ago, happy day that was. Have you done the EDC? If not, you might find that helpful. Best wishes, it is challenging.

          4. Anna says:

            A Victor.
            Yes it seems common in the long term partners/victims of narcissistic abuse.
            The most important is removing yourself from it before damage is done permanently.
            I strongly believe that sociopaths can be made from extreme long term psychopathic gaslighting/ and or narcissistic abuse and that sadly there is no going back.
            Worse thing is you do not miss what you never had. Psychopaths never had emotions. Sociopaths do or did. They can just turn them off at will.

            I remember love
            I remember feeling something

            Now I am just a husk
            Sometimes if I listen to certain music or films I can provoke an emotion to arise.

            Sadly I have become a misanthropist. I dislike people. I hate being around them. I am full of disgust.

            I am in therapy but I fear I will never heal

            PTSD people experience emotional numbing.
            What it if becomes a long term thing?

            Not many studies done on this.

            Strangely since I have become numb my husband prefers the way I am now, a dead husk of a human being. Or maybe I am just good at acting and faking being alive.

          5. A Victor says:

            Anna, I am so sorry to read all of this. I do understand your concerns, more than you know. When I arrived here, I was so similar to you. Between learning what had happened in my life, consults with HG and the amazing bloggers who knew just what to say and when to say it, I have healed so much. I arrived with (self diagnosed) CPTSD, had been in therapy multiple times, literally with only 2 memorable/”helpful” things coming from it, could not feel much at all and didn’t know who I was.

            On this blog, I was transformed, people helped me because they knew, they’d been there too. I hope you are consulting with HG regularly and, not knowing your circumstances, why you can’t go NC at this time, I hope you are at least able to accomplish ANC as much as possible, it will truly help you, your recovery.

            My feelings have come back slowly, it doesn’t terrify me as much now, and I’m learning to recognize them and name them and then I’m able to consider how I want to respond to them. I still don’t like being touched except by my children and grandchildren. I still don’t like most people, that doesn’t even bother me. I still don’t trust, in fact less now than before even. I see things here that confuse me and make me feel I can’t yet trust my own instincts. But, I have to keep going, I can’t let them, narcs, beat me. I won’t let them. My ex also preferred me as a dead husk, until I had a supernova at the end and he could no longer control me, then he left.

            I will again recommend the EDC, if you have not taken it, I really believe it will help you, especially if combined with the TDC. I won’t mention it again, if you haven’t taken it, you have your reasons. But one thing it did for me, which I hadn’t even known I’d needed, was that it gave me permission to be an empath, I no longer had to waste my time wondering if I could heal, if it was worth my time to try. Not saying this would be true or needed for you, just a way that it helped me.

            I only write all this in hopes of encouraging you, I hope it is not too much. You are in a good place here.

  5. Asp Emp says:

    “Are they a natural reaction to pain, an instinctual response wired within the human psyche? Or are they a product of societal conditioning…..”

    In my experiences, I’d suggest it depends on what the pain is, in which the mind / body “responds”. More often than not, it’s instinctual, immediate. There may be a delay on occasion, where the mind has not quite ‘picked up’ on what had / is occurring. One time I had trapped my finger in the car door without feeling the pain, it was only when I realised why I could not move my hand, simply because my finger was trapped! When I opened the car door, ooohhh, it f*cking hurt. It bled a lot. Agh. Grab the tissues (I store some in the car, just in case!!). Then logic kicked in. To cut a long story short, I did not go to A&E because I knew I just needed to bandage it up and let it repair itself over time.

    The heart attack was different. My mind was not engaging properly, as if subdued, as if the physical pain was overriding the ability for my brain to function in the way it would normally have done. I was trying to think but it was as if there was a blockage, as if my body was refusing my mind to operate. I would suggest, from my perception, that the body went into some kind of underlying primal ‘mode’ almost like shutting off parts of my mind to “concentrate” on fighting to survive but it was not instinctual because I would have recognised it as such. There was no panicking. No racing mind. No ‘rush’ to “respond” (or act). It was as if my body was going through the motions without actually being totally cognitively aware, or, understanding. It was around 45 minutes in all, from the start to when the ambulance arrived. For around 10 to 15 minutes before the ambulance arrived, my dog was pacing up and down alongside the settee I was lying on. I was lying still, experiencing the creeping coldness as it spread from my fingers / toes up my legs / arms before it ‘gathered’ into my torso and that is the moment I thought “Are they going to be on time?”. That was the only thought I had. The rest of the time, I was just lying there. Calm. No panic. Just acceptance.

    As for “societal conditioning”, hmmm, I honestly cannot confirm it is as such from my personal experiences. Maybe it is the case of those who are around others all the time?

    I cannot recall the pain I experienced at the time when my father died. In the years that followed, I sensed a dark ‘baggage’ of, maybe like a ‘presence’ that would not shift, I only recognised this to be a “darkness” as such the day after my heart attack (and referenced as to not wanting to ‘carry’ this any more). That became acute when my dog died. It was as if it ‘solidified’, like a soft kind of ‘mass’ that hardened. 2 months after my dog died, I had that ‘explosion’ at the MRN. Then I entered the unaware emotional suicidal period (coincidently the winter months). Just over 9 months after my dog died, I found HG’s work. Since then, the “darkness” has gone. Having said that, I believe, it has the ‘ability’ to return if I permit it to do so and that I would recognise it when (if) it does.

    “Does it serve as a catalyst for growth and resilience, or is it a cruel reminder of the inherent vulnerability of human life?”

    In my opinion (and experience), I’d suggest both. It depends on the individual and who is around them in their life, or, circumstances at the present time. There are moments of strengths and moments of weaknesses, whether there are any existing, or, potential (if any) forthcoming opportunities / threats.

    “Does pain connect individuals, fostering empathy and compassion, or does it isolate, driving a wedge between the sufferer and the rest of the world?”

    For some, it may “connect”, for others, it “isolates”. I can see where and when this occurs. One person may ‘respond’ yet one has to question the authenticity of the intentions of the inquirer. It’s interesting to observe the differences in how people approach others to offer support where the circumstances are ‘trivial’ compared to situations that others may be experiencing which are not as “mild” in comparison.

    The paragraph starting with “I have also seen how through the passage of time….” reminds me of HG’s book ‘Who is Alastor?’.

    Pain. Comes in all manner of ways. Everyone understands physical pain, including you.

    From what I have read on KTN, empaths may experience emotional / mental pain differently to other empaths. Based on their individual experiences. I would suggest that maybe, the different schools / cadres of empaths may experience ‘pain’ differently too, maybe that can depend on the measurements of the schools / cadres? As you have indicated as such in your recent works on Empath series.

    HG, I like these writings of yours as they are different from your usual style as you have shown on the blog since you started it. There is a marked difference in your own thinking style as it does appear to have become more sharp, more fine-tuned, as is part of the purpose of starting KTN in the first place. Further development and evolving your way of thinking, progressively without losing the analytical, or the lateral approach that has always been present. It’s also your own self confidence that has become stronger because of the further understanding within yourself as an individual by, also, expanding your own ‘encyclopedia’ into ‘reading’ other’s words to understand their emotional / mental states far more quickly than you may have done so compared to 5 years ago maybe. Kudos to you and what you’ve achieved is far more than anyone possibly could have imagined you would. Thank you X

  6. Anna says:

    I find emotional pain to be far worse than physical pain. It leaves unseen scars. Personally the emotional scarring lasts longer and leaves deeper wounds.

    I have been physically injured by a narcissist and psychologically.

    I noticed as well, this horrible sick grimace from the narcissist. They found it much more delightful to hurt emotionally, that their words cut like a knife. Pure sadism.

    I have never understood this incessant need to hurt others. It repulses me. I find it disgusting. People who pick on others who are weaker than them or cause pain in this way make me feel like I want to throw up a volcano.

  7. Kimberly Ann Michaud says:

    I’m just curious if your saying you don’t experience physical pain such as headaches , stomach pain , colds and flu etc, back pain

    1. HG Tudor says:

      No, I am not stating that, I experience pain.

      1. Contagious says:

        I read psychopaths have a higher tolerance of pain. Not alone some people do. I also studied psychopathy a lot years ago since my husband was diagnosed ASD. While 1% of the population is estimated to be psychopaths 25% of American prisons are estimated to be psychopaths. There are MANY MRIs and other studies showing various differences in the brain. Psychopaths have no empathy so MOST have difficulty understanding emotional pain accurately as they have no ability to understand another’s perspective. I would say again HG that you are a small percent of the 1% who cognitively gets close to understanding human emotion. You are the ULTRA but as many studies show Most psychopaths don’t come close to understanding pain or human emotions and make poor decisions filling the prisons. I think there must be classes of psychopaths ie sadistic, the arsons, the typical criminals , etc…or ASDs….correct?

  8. Leigh says:

    I’ve read this article several times and I keep sensing envy. We have something that Mr. Tudor doesn’t have, a full range of emotions. I would imagine that threatens his control. To me, this article is a way to nullify that threat by Mr. Tudor distinguishing himself from humans and stating he is superior.

    Mr. Tudor states in “The Green Green Eyes That Roam” article:
    https://narcsite.com/2015/09/21/the-greengreen-eyes-that-roam/

    “I am driven by envy. You might wonder how someone who is naturally superior to everyone else could be envious of other people. After all, if they are inferior what is there to be jealous about? Therein lies the problem. Since I perceive most other people as inferior, if I find that they have something better than what I have, I immediately find myself angry.”

    “The anger rises inside and I must lash out.”

    “Once I have spoiled it I feel a tremendous relief and the power washes over me in an awesome way.”

    Mr. Tudor is spoiling us to feel the tremendous relief and power wash over him.

    Envy, threat to control, nullify the threat. That was my interpretation of this article.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I do not regard a wider range of emotions as something better than what I have. I regard my reduced emotional spectrum as superior, something that has been borne out time and time again. Therefore the article is not based on envy.

      1. Leigh says:

        Thank you for the clarification, Mr. Tudor. I see my error now. Having a full range of emotions is a hindrance and therefore inferior.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          That is correct, although I recognise there will be those who will disagree.

        2. Anna says:

          It depends. Sometimes it is a hinderance, sometimes it is not.

          In some jobs for example it is necessary to have a certain level of emotional empathy, and in some not.

          Psychopathy is essential to the survival of the human race.
          All of us have our place

          Not all psychopaths are criminal, some do their jobs very well and obey the law.

      2. NarcAngel says:

        On first reading, I had a similar thought to what Leigh wrote, but identified it more as fury than envy, but also (as she noted) assertion of control.
        My thoughts (as best I can describe) were along these lines while reading the article:

        HG has acknowledged previously that he regards his reduced emotional spectrum as advantageous in achieving what he wants, that it makes him more effective and adds to his superiority, but at the end of the day he, or more accurately, his narcissism/psychopathy, has to believe this because there is no other choice for him. The only “evidence” if you will, to support this belief is to compare his accomplishments to what others with a full range of emotions have (or have not) achieved and his belief that the way he is has resulted in a superior outcome. This is because he must always win. The narcissism and psychopathy will accept nothing else. It is one thing for someone (anyone) to say that they have experienced both and decided one way was more effective than the other, but in HG’s case he has no choice as his emotional spectrum is limited. and the fury of knowing that limitation exists and that others possess something that he does not have, and cannot ever experience, requires assertion of control through immediate dismissal of those missing emotions as inferior, and assertion that this “lack” is actually what makes him superior. Ultra, even.

        As I said, these were thoughts that occurred, but they are not to support an argument that either (full, or limited range) is superior. Only as to how the narcissism/psychopathy might seek to identify and harness this difference or perceived “lack of range” as believed necessary to achieving what must be done.

        1. Truthseeker6157 says:

          NA,

          I think regarding partial access to an emotional range as being superior would be based upon what an individual views their purpose to be.

          For an individual with empathy they require a specific purpose. Life has to have some form of meaning or what is the point of us all being here? We will often find meaning within the human connections we make.

          I don’t think the psychopath has any need for a meaning in life. Life just is. If that is the case, then empathic emotion would genuinely be superfluous.

          The only thing that contradicts this for me as far as HG is concerned is the desire for a legacy. If you are truly detached, an onlooker and scribe of the human condition, if you truly believe yourself to be superior and above the trials and tribulations of inferior beings, then why the need to be remembered by these inferior beings? It suggests a need for some form of meaning. A point to it all. It’s scrawling “HG was here!” across the world.

          The desire for a legacy doesn’t quite fit the psychopathic position as far as I can tell at the moment.

          1. Rebecca says:

            NA,

            I think the reason HG has that “need for purpose/meaning of it all”, is because he’s a hybrid of Psychopath and Narcissist, so he has the Narcissist side of himself that is different than the Psychopath side. Maybe the need for a legacy is from the narcissist side of himself? Narcissist drive to one up on everyone else, the need to achieve greatness and have a better purpose than everyone else. It’s my guess. Xx

        2. Leigh says:

          Thank you, NA. You articulated my thoughts much better than I did.

          1. Rebecca says:

            Hi Leigh,
            You both made good comments xx

      3. Contagious says:

        Dear HG: you always write so beautifully but it’s comparing apples and oranges. You can’t miss what you don’t have. But love, joy, freudenfreude, happiness, wonder, awe, contentment, bliss, to name a few are the best parts of most peoples lives. It’s all they care about when dying: who they love. They would give up their life for those they loved. Interpersonal relations are shown to provide “ happiness” for most economic classes. Interpersonal relations prolong life and health as many studies show;) . As your YouTube on empaths show there are those empaths who are wildly successful too. I get the reasoning behind the survival of the fittest. But if you have never tasted love it’s like living in a desert without water. Having dinners without dessert. Or maybe not as apples and oranges. You can’t miss what you never had. But again apples and oranges. Coexistence. For me, holding my babies for the first time not only meant God had not given up hope on this world but that I was the luckiest woman alive. I am not alone on this feeling of love so deep, so filled with joy that your heart would burst. The meaning of my life is love. The greatest award is love. Love nourishes me and the more I give the more I get. Life is hard at times but without those I love, I would just exist.

    2. A Victor says:

      Hi Leigh,
      I think it’s all based on his perception as opposed to our perception. There is envy, as you observe, for narcissists but I’m not sure that is the case for the psychopathy side. It seems like more of just observations of things, not really a need or desire to partake in those things. A curiosity of what it would be like to partake maybe but I don’t see a need for it. Also, we know that from his perspective, which is not ours, lack of emotion is superior. Is this done to negate the challenge that it may be inferior? Again, I think from the narcissism, yes but for the psychopathy, no. The psychopathy is the truer predator, it really has no need of emotion and all that goes with that, except as it alleviates boredom by creating and satisfying curiosity. The narcissism needs our emotions in a different way, for a broader range, the prime aims. The coldness then, toward other humans, of the psychopathy is what is staggering to me. And the reason that inflicting pain intentionally and for no other reason than that boredom and curiosity, can be done. It is chilling to me to consider that mentality for myself, I can’t imagine it and don’t want to. It also speaks to the lack of concern about causing death for the victim, as opposed to the narcissist who prefers the victim alive usually. What better way to be god at that moment, but also to experience observing the ultimate terror in another, when they realize they are going to die. And since there is no need for fuel, until the boredom picks up again, good riddance, another victim is easily obtained. Chilling, all of it. I don’t see envy though. Only curiosity.

      1. Leigh says:

        Hi AV,
        Yes, I agree our perspective is very different than the narcissist’s perspective. When I was reading the article, I was trying to put myself in his shoes but It didn’t work, lol.

        I still think he’s asserting control in the article. I realize now that its not because of envy. :Like NA says above, others possess something that he does not have which would require assertion of control through immediate dismissal. He dismisses it by saying that a full range of emotions is inferior.

        I do see the curiosity also. He’s the bringer of pain and then observes in order to learn and understand. I do see that very clearly as well.

        I thought TS’s comment above was intriguing as well. If he truly is detached and just an observer, why does he need a legacy?

        Mr. Tudor said in an interview recently that a psychologist once told him that his narcissism gets in the way of his psychopathy. That’s what I saw in this article. His narcissism getting in the way of his psychopathy. I can see the alleviation of boredom and the assertion of control.

        I will say this also, I don’t think I want to see how deep Mr. Tudor’s psychopathy goes and that might be blurring it a bit for me.

        1. A Victor says:

          Hi Leigh,
          I see, yes, that is evident also, the need for control. Or maybe it’s not a “need for” control, but just a fact of control. This is one place I see the psychopathy as a little different from the narcissism. The narcissism is, somewhere in itself, aware of the possibility of losing control and has raised very effective defenses to either not allow it or to bring it back to their control as quickly as possible. I feel like the psychopathy does not feel any lack of control but instead embraces the victim’s attempts at getting control as all part of the game, making it more boredom reducing, or interesting, for the psychopath. When I’ve read HG starting “I like it when they fight”, this is what I’ve felt is going on.

          The question about the legacy is very interesting. The narcissism is in play.

          I did not put myself in his shoes, no way for me to even want to do that. At the same time, reading it as an observer, the depths that the depravity, and the necessary disconnect that is required to accompany that was all too evident. I don’t care what anyone says, this kind of disconnect is terrifying to me. That we have people walking among us who basically see us as a toy, like a cat sees a mouse, and they may be no less ruthless.

          Thank you for the reply, it was thought provoking for me.

          1. Leigh says:

            AV,
            Yes, I agree. The narcissism needs to nullify all threats to control. Whereas the psychopathy likes the fight because its part of the game and it alleviates the boredom. It sends shivers down my spine when I hear Mr. Tudor say, “I like it when they fight.”

            I remember listening to one of Mr. Tudor’s interviews and he was describing his psychopathy and the need to alleviate the boredom. He describe the psychopathy as working like this:

            I wonder what breaking bones sound like?
            Oh, that’s what they sound like.

            He said it very matter of fact. That was eye opening for me. That’s something I should remember.

            Thank you for sharing your thoughts, AV. Your comment was thought provoking for me as well. It reminded me of that interview. Thank you.

          2. A Victor says:

            I had that effect from China Doll the first time I read it. And every time since. Chilling.

        2. Contagious says:

          Hi Leigh:

          Narcs need fuel. Psychopaths don’t. They are goal oriented with a limited range of emotion. So if a narc wants fuel from someone but this doesn’t work towards a psychopaths goal, it gets in the way. That’s how I see it anyway. For example, both are predators but a narc would rather see its victim alive for fuel, the psychopath would only be interested in obtaining the goal. Psychopaths are concerned about consequences. They don’t see the end game as prison or their own death. And not all psychopaths are bloodthirsty.

          1. Leigh says:

            Hi Contagious,
            The needing of fuel gets in the way of the goal. Yes, that makes sense. I was wondering more about the assertion of control. I could be wrong here, I thought the narcissism needs to assert control, not the psychopath. So I thought the need to assert control, could get in the way of the psychopath as well.

          2. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Hi Leigh, Contagious,

            I’m not sure if the need for fuel would always get in the way. It might do sometimes in terms of slowing HG down a little, a need to interact for example rather than completely self isolate and write a book.

            In other circumstances, the need for fuel might actually facilitate the psychopath’s objective. It broadens networks, forces interaction. People provide opportunity. People might also be unwittingly manipulated into facilitating the achievement of a larger goal, cogs in a wheel kind of idea.

            If there are no emotional bonds, then you would expect the need for human interaction to be reduced. There’s little incentive for interaction. I think this likely holds true for pure psychopaths. I have read an account where a psychopath discusses dislike of other people’s birthdays. I pricked my ears up there because narcissists will ruin birthdays due to a threat to control. Fuel is directed away from them, less attention is paid to them etc. For the pure psychopath, the dislike of birthdays was for a different reason, nothing to do with control or attention being placed elsewhere. It was to do with the requirement to attend a visit or birthday party that the psychopath had no interest in attending. Essentially “ Other people’s birthdays prevent me from doing me stuff.” It’s that ‘me’ focus but without a need for control or fuel. Such a simple statement but one that rings true. On the whole I don’t think psychopaths have a need for control but I estimate they will control people if those people either assist or prevent the achievement of an objective.

            Human interaction will assist with boredom alleviation. Boredom could also be alleviated via solitary pursuits though if fuel wasn’t a requirement. I know of one psychopath who is into gaming for example. She also writes. No direct human contact required but boredom is alleviated. I wonder how much of HG’s productivity is driven by staving off boredom.

            Xx

          3. Contagious says:

            Hey Leigh! Good question but I see it as the same, a dual alignment to assert control. I don’t see this as the problem between the two as both want control. Different reasons. But if a psychopaths goal is ONLY to get money from someone not fuel then both want control but only one wants money only. Psychopaths want the money. End of. No return for fuel. No desire for anything else. Control for money only. The narc might want fuel and to continue on with getting fuel. I could see a problem here. For example, killing the person in a robbery is an effective way to achieve the goal but the narc loses the fuel.

          4. Anna says:

            Well said Contagious. I think you are right about that.

  9. Asp Emp says:

    HG, this is a very good piece of writing. It prompted a lot of thoughts on my part. I did write a comment on this yet have not posted it……. I may need to think about it further. Thank you X

  10. zaynab298 says:

    Great insight about how the observation of a psychopath differ from what it is called “normal” person. Excellent article HG..

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you.

  11. Leela_Z says:

    Wow, that´s dark and creepy! I can feel the darkness, the emptiness! Whoah, what a good Friday night reading (even though it´s Thursday, but we don´t care, do we? 😉).

  12. Truthseeker6157 says:

    The first thing I thought when I read this was that it sounds a bit like someone with a God complex. I’m not trying to be mean or critical when I say that either, it’s just what came to mind. “The bringer of pain.”

    Perhaps that was intentional. God (if there is one) witnesses pain in his creation on a daily and widespread basis, and he does nothing to stop it either, despite his alleged benevolence. It’s the Epicurus conundrum and the Christian response seems to be that pain and suffering transforms and brings us closer to the Divine. To suffer is to evolve into a ‘better’ version of ourselves. Sure it is.

    Does pain unite people in compassion? No. I’m sure a group of cancer sufferers undergoing chemotherapy on the same day would prefer not to be having poison pumped through their veins, united in the fight, compassionate or not.

    I hadn’t considered lack of emotional response to pain as regards the psychopath. I’d considered it in terms of fear, but not pain. The psychopath is human, knows what pain feels like but there’s nothing else, just pain or, no pain. It starts and it stops. Agree. There is no higher purpose to pain and suffering than the pain itself.

    To observe someone suffering, to support, to be there for them. No thanks. All good over here. I can imagine nothing worse than someone offering comforting words, patting my arm, giving sympathetic looks if I was suffering from an illness or in pain. Leave me be to get on with it. Fix it or get out, you are of no use to me here.

    That reminds me of giving birth. Give me the ice chips, all I ask. Stroke my back or encourage me to breathe and you’re a dead man. Haha! I digress.

    Self discovery? Through pain? My head hurts. Discovered.

    The only thing I can think of that I can half agree with is the law of diminishing returns. If you have all the money in the world, that fifth super car doesn’t have quite the same buzz to it. If you have to save for the super car, then you are elated. So to suffer for a time, might make people appreciate being well just a little more. Possibly, but I wouldn’t see that realisation as being transformational.

    I think the idea of transformation through pain is the con of a narcissist. Poor people starving and dying in droves from disease and malnutrition whilst the Pharaoh planned his next pyramid.

    Pain is pain, end of. It starts, it stops, you fix it or, you fix it. The psychopath’s response is the correct one in my view, nothing deep, just an unfortunate fact of life.

    1. A Victor says:

      TS, I thought of the God complex also. Also, the word disgusting came to my mind, as well as the utter degradation that a human mind can go to. Love you HG but wow, glad not to know you, up close and personal anyway.

      1. Truthseeker6157 says:

        Hi AV,

        The concept of ‘purification’ ties in to this God idea too I think. Purification has cropped up several times in HG’s articles.

        1. A Victor says:

          Hi TS,
          Yes, I see that too. I find that very interesting in fact. I feel like the line between narcissism and psychopathy is a blurry one at times.

          Thank you for the reply.

          1. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Hi AV,

            I agree, it is blurry in some respects. In others it seems impossible for both to coexist in one person.

          2. Rebecca says:

            Hi TS and AV,

            I don’t think they coexist so well, I think sometimes the two halves fight each other and get in the way of each other, HG even has said, on the blog, that his narcissism gets in the way of his psychopathy…or was it the other way around?? HG?? Xx

          3. Asp Emp says:

            Rebecca, I would suggest the HG’s in-depth understanding about himself aids his ‘determining’ whether it is his psychopathic, or his narcissistic components that is requiring ‘attention’. Even though HG can access his fuel matrix at any time, this may be (at times) a ‘chore’ that he has to do otherwise it may impact on how his psychopathy has to put his need for boredom (access to interests) on a delay? In any case, both need ‘feeding’. He has shared that he can operate for a number of days if he is well fuelled (or has no triggers to reduce his fuel levels) while operating in psychopath ‘mode’ – while out off grid. (I’m just speaking out loud and may have got it wrong here). Apologies for any offense, HG X

          4. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Hi Rebecca,

            I was pondering this today. The legacy is to do with the narcissism. HG has said death is a threat to control. In order to assert control over death HG creates a legacy so that in effect he lives on through his work. There are no children for him to live on through, so, without the legacy he can’t beat death in terms of living on.

            On the face of it I see the thinking. I just accepted that idea without further thought.

            But since the recent psychopathy videos I thought about it again. If the legacy is HG’s body of work, what if not a single person read an article or book, or listened to a video, podcast or anything else? Would the legacy have any power without it being accessed? I think we can safely say no. It’s the idea of people reading and accessing the material that was created by HG. So it is people that give the legacy meaning. People keep it alive and by extension keep HG alive.

            The same people HG regards as inferior. The same people, he is detached from, has no empathy for and who he observes like fungus on a Petri dish. If that is the case, why on earth would he be the least bit bothered about being remembered by people he has no regard for? Even I wouldn’t care about being remembered or even referred to by people I didn’t know.

            To me, it doesn’t fit together. It seems to at first, but then it doesn’t. You are detached or you aren’t. Even looking at it from a fuel perspective. The legacy wouldn’t provide fuel if HG was dead. He’s dead! The comments positive and negative, the criticism or adulation that legacy garners would never be felt. To all intents and purposes it might as well not exist.

            So any fuel comes from thought fuel, now, the planning of it, the imagining of comments such as “ That HG Tudor was ahead of his time. He got it right.” That fuel comes in before death. He thinks about it now. It would be low potency, written word or unheard spoken word, and from largely tertiary sources. Not great in terms of the fuelometer.

            The psychopath doesn’t seek meaning from life. The desire for meaning stems from connection and is rooted in empathy. This is absent in the psychopath so there is life, then there is death. That’s it. The narcissist thinks he has meaning in life, believes he seeks it, places a value in people, albeit a self serving value and believes they are connected to him. So the legacy points more to narcissism but it doesn’t fit at all with the detached nature of psychopathy. You can’t be half detached, either you are or you aren’t.

            I really struggle with NPD and psychopathy co existing. I could understand psychopathy with high narcissistic traits and I could understand NPD through its very nature housing psychopathic traits but the real drivers behind psychopathy and narcissism seem too different to be housed within one personality.

            Xx

          5. A Victor says:

            Yes Rebecca, that is what I remember also. And things like, how can one need fuel and one not etc. I appreciate the reminder from both you and TS.

          6. Rebecca says:

            @AspEmp, TS and AV,

            I have no doubt, AspEmp, that HG can very easily manage both sides of himself. HG mentioned in one of his articles, where he was having a discussion with “the good doctor” about how his narcissism gets in the way of his Psychopathy because of the need for fuel and the fight with boredom from the Psychopathy…can be a distraction too, but I know HG is used to the battle and succeeds every day. Look what he accomplishes in one day! I don’t worry about HG failing, he makes sure he never does. Xx

    2. WiserNow says:

      TS,

      “If you have to save for the super car, then you are elated. So to suffer for a time, might make people appreciate being well just a little more.”

      At the risk of being ignored or treated like an annoyance, I think it is important to respond to this particular part of your comment.

      I’m not sure why you think that saving for a needed or wanted item results in feeling ‘elated’.

      For example, if you ask a displaced refugee, say a single mother whose husband is either missing or deceased, if working and saving to pay for bills, a mortgage and child-care, while also facing prejudice, makes her feel ‘elated’, I think you may receive a very quizzical look in response.

      Another example: if you ask a retired or senior person who has worked and saved for most of their life in order to have a comfortable lifestyle and then finds that a flood or landslide or fire has demolished their home or business in a matter of hours, I don’t think they would feel ‘elated’ about the need to save in order to acquire another house or business.

      My aim here is to express a view and/or to illustrate examples that convey specific information. I am not contradicting you for the sake of argument or to be negative. My point is that I don’t think blanket statements about how others feel about certain things are all that helpful, knowledgable or informative.

      I hope my point is understood rather than taken as a ‘challenge’.

  13. Anna says:

    Pinheads best quotes on YouTube

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lzC0aIVFvw

    Really does sound a bit like HG

  14. Anna says:

    Excellent as always HG.

    Also very deep

    Seriously though, even though psychopaths observe do they care? Do they honestly think that deep about someones pain through observation? I from my experiences found they do not care about other people’s pain. Not all of them are sadists. Some of them find people in pain incredibly annoying.

    Psychopaths still feel physical pain too, unless they have leprosy or another disease that makes them numb.

  15. Contagious says:

  16. WiserNow says:

    …and yet psychopaths feel their own ‘pain’ so acutely and so thoroughly – in the form of wounding, or needing vengeance, or being bored, or needing control at every moment.

    …and they turn into predators to relieve that ‘pain’.

    It reminds me of having an itch and needing to scratch the site of the itch.

    Scientists discovered that an itch is a sensation that arises from the irritation of skin cells or nerve cells associated with the skin. An itch serves as an important sensory and self-protective mechanism. The nerve cells that initiate an itch are specialised nerve cells called ‘C-fibres’ and they are activated to convey the itch sensation. These C-fibres are identical to those associated with the sensation of pain, yet they are only activated in association with an itch.

  17. Allison says:

    There are so many flavors of pain. Stabbing. Thudding. Electric. Dull. Deep. Sharp. Burning. Wrenching. So, so many descriptors could be used.

    I’ve experienced pain that caused me to go out of my body. It was as though who I am inside went up and out through the top of my head. The intensity separated me from myself.

    I receive pain. I do so because I have a tremendous capacity for it. I can’t bear to administer it. My purpose is to bear up and transform.

  18. Bubbles says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,
    Do you by any chance write novels ?
    Absolutely captivating, thank you 😊

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I have done.

      1. MB says:

        Hi HG,
        Are there any novels available under a pen name other than HG Tudor? (If you have to kill me once that information is divulged, just pretend I never asked!) I don’t need to bringer of pain to visit upon me!

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Yes.

          1. MB says:

            Damn me for asking a yes/no question!

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Suck it up buttercup!

          3. WhoCares says:

            Hahaha MB – didn’t you learn from KHG?

          4. MB says:

            WC, I’m rusty! But we all know it doesn’t matter how it’s asked anyway 🤣

          5. Rebecca says:

            Dear HG,

            Will you tell us the name, or would that be too much info for us about you?? Xx

          6. HG Tudor says:

            No.

          7. Rebecca says:

            HG,

            It was worth a shot, I figured I’d get a no….can’t blame me for trying. 😆 xx

          8. Anna says:

            That is very interesting. Alot of authors do this. HG. Will you at least divulge the other work that you do under your other name? I am interested in reading your other literature. Or send me a recommendation by email? Thanks in advance.

          9. Dani says:

            Mr. Tudor,

            Do you write nonfiction under another pseudonym?

            Thank you for your time. Much appreciated.

          10. HG Tudor says:

            I write under another pseudonym.

          11. Asp Emp says:

            Good on you, HG. I had guessed that you do too 🙂

          12. Dani says:

            Thank you, sir.

        2. Rebecca says:

          Hi MB,

          We need to ask open ending questions. 😆 🤣

      2. Bubbles says:

        Dear Mr Tudor,
        May I enquire as to the genre category?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          You may enquire Bubbles but you will not get an answer!

          1. annaamel says:

            ‘I’m an author. You know, the kind no one ever sees. I never leave my home in the woods. You’ll never know who I really am.
            When a dickhead cover model steps over the line with my assistant, I have no choice. I always protect what’s mine, no matter what lines it crosses.’

          2. Bubbles says:

            Dear Mr Tudor,
            No harm in asking…..thank you anyway

          3. Z- zwartbolleke says:

            He is a brilliant mind, isn’t it Mr Tudor?

          4. Duchessbea says:

            Romance and empathic fiction.
            Best,
            DB

  19. NarcAngel says:

    So many thoughts colliding while reading this. I will have to read and listen again. Several times I think.
    Fascinating series.

  20. Logan Day says:

    There is great wisdom in your perspective. Eastern philosophers have long thought that all of us have the same original face: the observer, the witness of life who exists in a perpetual state of detachment. Achieving this state is the central purpose of meditation, which people practice for their entire lives but sometimes still fail to truly grasp. The observer is believed by some to be the face of God, from whom we all emerge. Alan Watts said, “You are an aperture through which the universe is experiencing itself,” so your perspective & the understanding it brings are crucial to the realization of the Grand Design, whatever that may be. Just a bit of woo-woo food for thought.

    1. Candied Pansy says:

      “Eastern philosophers have long thought that all of us have the same original face: the observer, the witness of life who exists in a perpetual state of detachment.”
      George Lucas took things from the east for Star Wars, like Jedi detachment.

      Is detachment our original lack of existence, that narcs avoid? Were the first humans cluster B? HG is a psychopath and commandeers it. Most of us can’t. See The Futility of Feelings. Despite pain, our brains crave stimulation. Maybe we’ll create a world like The Giver, beyond industrial beige but comfortable, or Midsommar. Who do we sacrifice to keep nirvana? Will it be easy when it’s our turn? Do we insist on a child for our Omelas, knowing that when kids are in our entertainment they suffer, or will we evolve beyond needing to distract ourselves? I don’t know. See compassion fatigue and addictions too.

      Enneagram 5 says hi. Does HG know his? I say 3 or 8 for the core. Whether or not personality systems work on those w/ “disorders” is another question.

      There is also a song, “Ancient Dreams in a Modern Land” by Marina.
      ♪ “…I am the observer; I’m a witness of life.
      I live in the space between the stars and the sky.
      From the heart of Malaysia, to the dark Himalayas…” ♪

      “The observer is believed by some to be the face of God, from whom we all emerge. Alan Watts said, “You are an aperture through which the universe is experiencing itself,” so your perspective & the understanding it brings are crucial to the realization of the Grand Design, whatever that may be.”
      Some people think we’ll be one post death. Christian*ty doesn’t. Believers detach from the world, but attach to God. Pain is a way to hope. Romans 5:3-5. *besides universalists. HG is a watcher and harbinger. I wonder if he’s read the book of Enoch. Some verses seem as if every bit of life is part of the Grand Design, even HG. Others don’t. Other religions have their views, and people have their own views. I am sorry if I offended at all.

      1. Jordyguin says:

        „George Lucas took things from the east for Star Wars, like Jedi detachment.“

        Hello there!((:

        George Lucas gave an explanation in a 2020 published „Star Wars Archives 1999-2005“. He explained how the Force really works.
        Now it all becomes even more interesting if I think about the Fuel and the Force… (But to keep in mind that George Lucas repeat that it isn’t science and is just as mythological as anything else in Star Wars.)

        If you watched just the films, you’ve probably never heard about the Whills, but: „Midi-chlorians and the Whills are among the most complicated Star Wars concepts, and they would have been explored in George Lucas’ Star Wars sequels.“ Disney of course dropped this ideas.

        George Lucas: „I like to think that there is a unified reality to life and that it exists everywhere in the universe and that it controls things, but you can also control it. That’s why I split it into the Personal Force and the Cosmic Force. The Personal Force is the energy field created by our cells interacting and doing things while we are alive. When we die, we lose our persona and our energy is assimilated into the Cosmic Force. If we have enough Midichlorians in our body, we can have a certain amount of control over our Personal Force and learn how to use it, like the Buddhist practice of being able to walk on hot coals. The Jedi will train you to connect to your Personal Force, and then to connect to the Cosmic Force. You don’t have much power to control the Cosmic Force, but you can make use of it.

        To understand the Force and the Whills, it’s necessary to begin with midi-chlorians. Named as a blend of mitochondria and chlorophyll, the midi-chlorians are born in the cells, and help a living organism develop by providing them with energy. The Whills, however, can be compared to a bacteria or fungi in this context, and they exist in a symbiotic relationship with the midi-chlorians. With the midi-chlorians essentially representing the living organisms’ ability to generate energy – and therefore to be alive and generate the Force – the Whills need the midi-chlorians to exist, as the Whills feed off of the Force.”

        – Qui-Gon Jinn spoke to Anakin in The Phantom Menace of a symbiotic relationship between the midi-chlorians and the living things, yet, according to Lucas, the real key symbiotic relationship sustaining existence in the galaxy happens between the Whills and the midi-chlorians. Without the midi-chlorians to help the living creatures exist, there would be no Force for the Whills to feed off of. According to Lucas, symbiosis lies at the heart of the concept of balance – an important idea in the saga. –
        (Full article: https://screenrant.com/star-wars-whills-midi-chlorians-force-explained-by-lucas/)

        Further relevant quote from George Lucas in “James Cameron’s Story of Science Fiction“:

        “Back in the day, I used to say ultimately what this means is we were just cars, vehicles, for the Whills to travel around in…. We’re vessels for them. And the conduit is the midi-chlorians. The midi-chlorians are the ones who communicate with The Whills. The Whills, in a general sense, they are the Force.“

        I remember reading someone asked HG if he is Darth Vader or the Emperor? HG answered „I’m the Force“.

        See! Make sense!

        1. Candied Pansy says:

          Jordy, hello! 🙂

          The idea of fuel as the Force, versus HG as the Force, is a can of worms!

          I’ve just seen the films and didn’t know of the Whills. Typical Disney, dumbing it down. I don’t expect Lucas to be scientific, but I think sometimes movies and shows expose parts of reality we don’t know or accept as real! There could be human clones, for example. It’s not exclusive to Star Wars.

          Reading the screenrant article… thank you for sharing it.

          Whills were immortals watching mortal drama, and Lucas turned them into the Force. When there’s a Whill, there’s a way! *ba-dum tss* I saw Rogue One, but didn’t know what the Whills cult was about.

          Lucas thinks a force/energy governs our world, but we can use it. A few New Agers do too, and everyone’s energy joining the cosmic force at death. It’s in the first 6 films, and Jedi teaching how to use the personal force, like Buddhists teaching how to walk on coals. Do Sith use the cosmic force more, like Anakin wanting to save Padme?

          I remember Qui-Gon Jinn speaking of the midi-chlorians, but it’s sad the Whills were left out, if their symbiosis with midi-chlorians is the heart of the saga. #justiceforwhills

          “In terms of scale, there are up to 10,000 midi-chlorians for every cell – and 100,000 Whills for every midi-chlorian.” That’s 1,000,000,000 (a billion) Whills per cell! “It is estimated that we have 100 trillion microbes in our body, and we are made up of about 90 percent bacteria and 10 percent human cells. So, who is in service to whom?” Good question!

          Whills have the force, and midi-chlorians help us use it, like chlorophyll turns sunlight into energy. Are Whills like helpful bacteria in our guts? I don’t know what midi-chlorians would be. Maybe Whills are pre-biotics and midi-chlorians are pro-biotics, or the other way around.

          Could the Whills be mushrooms in a forest, if they’re like bacteria or fungi? At first they seem like parasites, feeding off the force and midi-chlorians. I’m not sure when Whills ARE the force or when they use the force. If Whills are the first life, are all other beings parasites? Is it symbiotic, no matter who was first? HG has said a narcissist/empath are symbiotic, at least with a CoD.

          Maybe HG is Venom, wanting a worthy host, but he says he’s the force. HG, have you tried Tom Hardy? ;p He feels removed from humanity, observing and arranging us from a distance, even if you’re in his bed. It could mean he’s the force behind a world power, say the UK government, and figurehead status is beneath him. He could be the force that empowers and edifies those who learn to use their midi-chlorians. What are midi-chlorians to us? Logical thinking? What are Whills? HG and/or his works?

          Making sense isn’t my strong suit! I’m sorry if I misunderstood anything you said or quoted. Thank you for the food for thought!

  21. WhoCares says:

    Excellent reading. So interesting to have insight into your world.

  22. MB says:

    HG, You’ve felt extreme physical pain, surely. Will you be sharing your experience and reaction to your own pain? That would be most interesting. Thank you in advance.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Yes, I experience physical pain, I also experience pain in my ears when Celine Dion sings.

      1. A Victor says:

        Hi HG,
        MB’s question is interesting, regarding your reaction to your own physical pain, do you observe it clinically in the same way as you do others? As TS stated in her comment with regard to childbirth, we need something through it, for her was ice chips, for others maybe something else. But alongside that, for me at least, there was an element of watching myself and how I was responding/reacting to the pain. And it was in an odd sense bringing me into myself in a way that nothing else ever has, it was all consuming and I did come out of it a bit different as a person. Stronger, more confident, knowing myself a bit better. Also more sensitive to others who are experiencing pain. But no more connected to others for it. Likely in part due to a narc husband who didn’t connect.

        Same with the abuse from my mother, I would go to a different place and in the end, she succeeded only in making me dismiss her as important, in doing so, I did find strength, but again, no connection. I remember driving myself, those parts that were vulnerable and could be hurt, deeper into myself with each hit, hit after hit, and being so alone in it, even as my siblings were experiencing the same. You don’t talk about it, there is sadness for each other but no real connection.

        Did you learn other’s reactions to pain in a similar way, through your own experiences with it, or was it entirely through observation of others? Do you feel that for yourself, your own physical pain has been a catalyst for change or a place where you experienced transformation?

        Thank you for your time. And for this new article, very interesting.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          I approach the issue of pain from a logical perspective of dealing with it, rather than allowing it to consume me and become my sole focus, which can be testing when Celine Dion is the source of the pain in my ears with her caterwauling.

          1. A Victor says:

            Hahaha, yes, I am aware of your feelings about Celine Dion, or at least your reaction to her singing. I fear many a music player may have destroyed in the process of you dealing with it…

            That is a good example, thank you!

      2. Rebecca says:

        Dear HG,
        Have you experimented on yourself to test your pain tolerance?? My brother did.
        What were the test and what did you find your tolerance to be??

        I feel pain intensely, but my drive keeps me walking on a blood blister, even after it burst, I keep walking. The fear of disappointing someone, keeps me moving, I must complete my responsibilities. I ignore the pain, I feel it, but I push it down. I go on autopilot, it’s how I can tolerate it, even being a redhead. It’s a learned coping mechanism for me. Getting my responsibilities done is more rewarding to me, than acknowledging the pain and stopping to tend to myself. The pain is just an obstacle to move through and pass. I wonder why the completion of my duties is more important than my own health and why it makes me feel better working through the pain?? Coping, how is that coping??

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Yes.

          In lots of different ways, endurance and physical combat the main ones.

          1. Rebecca says:

            Dear HG,
            Did you find your tolerance was high? Did you ever really hurt yourself testing yourself??
            Thanks for your replies and time xx

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Not to Celine Dion, no.
            No,I have suffered injuries but not “really hurt” myself as that would be self-defeating I am not stupid.

          3. Rebecca says:

            😆 🤣 HG,

            I wouldn’t be able to tolerate Celine enough to even try to test you with her music. Is it just me, or does she seem to have bizarre behavior? ? Xx

          4. Rebecca says:

            Dear HG,

            My question about really hurting yourself, while testing yourself…I meant, present time and past, like a child accident that happened while you were testing yourself…didn’t mean to imply you’re stupid. I know you’re not. Xx

            ….It reminds me, i knew a kid across the street from me, when I was about 8 and he was playing with matches. Another kid threw gasoline on him, while he had the lit match. He was badly burned, needed several skin graphs and several surgical procedures..He was 9 at the time, nothing he did to provoke the other kid either. I remember the photos my mother showed me, of his burns. I felt bad for him, up in the hospital and I remember my mother’s nonchalant attitude about his injuries. And why show me the pics?? No boundary recognition and so callous of her.

      3. Anna says:

        You are not alone. When I hear Celine Dion it is like a very bad case of tinitus.

  23. Leigh says:

    Absolutely brilliant, Mr. Tudor!

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you, Leigh.

  24. Rebecca says:

    Dear HG,

    Thank you for the great article, once again, you entertain and educate me. Xx ❤️ ❤️ Thanks again xx

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You’re welcome, Rebecca.

      1. Rebecca says:

        Dear HG,

        Your latest analysis series on Sinead O’ Conner has really got me second guessing her empath status. I’m glued to it, waiting on the next one! Looking forward to the conclusion! Xx

        Will you do the conclusion for Angelina and Tina Turner?? Xx

        Thanks HG xx

        1. Rebecca says:

          Thanks HG for the doing the conclusions on both of them! Xx

  25. Witch says:

    “ It is through pain that the full spectrum of human emotions is explored and understood. I am the bringer of pain, I am the deliverer of understanding”

    I immediately thought of cenobites

    1. HG Tudor says:

      That’s every second Tuesday of the month.

      1. Rebecca says:

        Dear HG,

        Speaking of pain, I had a question that popped up just now….When a narcissist loses at love, aka the victim gets away, does the narcissist feel pain, or do they just move on with no hurt feelings?? How do they react to being dumped?? What goes on in their head??Sorry, that’s more than one question xx Thanks HG xx

        1. HG Tudor says:

          The narcissist is wounded as I have explained previously.

          1. Rebecca says:

            Dear HG,

            Sorry, I haven’t been sleeping much. I meant to ask: At the end of the relationship, the narc seems to move on quickly and you’ve explained it’s from having no emotional connection to their partner, but yet they can hoover an ex partner and act like they want that person back, when that person got over them years ago.. . IF the narc has no emotional connection, why is it they come back again and again??? Just to get more fuel?? Seems like it’s more than that. I’ve moved on from my ex husband(Borderline) and yet, he finds a way to contact me, every couple of years…We’re the ones who get attached, why do they seem to hold on more than we do?? For the fuel??

          2. Rebecca says:

            Thanks for your response HG xx I appreciate you xx

      2. Allison says:

        I could bring dessert.

    2. Anna says:

      Me too Witch. Actually HG’s voice reminds me a bit of Pinhead the cenobite from the 1980s films. I can imagine him saying

      “I’ll tear your soul apart”
      “Oh the sweet suffering”

    3. Rebecca says:

      Hi Witch,

      My mind went there too. 😆 🤣 xx I’ve seen reproductions of the box from the movies, I won’t even touch that box….nope, not going there, my imagination just won’t let me. 🤣

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