I am both conqeueror and saviour. I enter a person´s world and set it ablaze, tearing apart everything that they recognize, I am the bringer of dark works and on certain occasions the implementation of my chaos engine has proven to be the saviour of more than one human being. Alastor, my gatherer of intelligence was so saved and recruited. I brought cold, clinical, pinpointed efficacy and tore down that which imprisoned her. From the carnage I emerge as rescuer. I am the destroyer. I am the saviour.
My psychopathy does not hinder my objective perception of the world to allow me to be of such effectiveness. So, when put in a situation where I have to save a human being from certain death, one might imagine that my response would be equally detached and analytical.
From my vantage point, I carefully observe the reactions of the person I am saving. Their wide-eyed panic, quickened breaths, and trembling limbs are evidence of the overwhelming fear that permeates their consciousness. I witness the way their face pales, muscles tense and their body language communicates a plea for help, seeking solace from their imminent demise.
Owing to my psychopathy, I am free from the constraints of feeling fear myself. Instead, my mind engages in a calculated exercise of strategy and analysis. I objectively evaluate the various options available, considering the most efficient and effective approach to rescue this individual from their precarious situation.
As I methodically anchor my mind to rationality, the heightened intensity surrounding the life-or-death scenario does not provoke a rise in my heart rate nor generate any adrenaline-fueled excitement. Rather, my focus narrows, and I carry out the necessary actions with stoic precision and measured movements.
While the person I am saving may cling to me in desperation, their trembling hands tightly clutching my arm, their pulse undoubtedly pounding with each passing second, I remain an impartial presence. There is no emotional bond or connection, I acknowledge their precarious state but viewing it as a problem to be solved rather than an experience to be shared.
From a purely observational standpoint, I notice the profound relief that washes over the individual once they are safely rescued. Their ragged breaths begin to slow, their body gradually relaxes, and I observe a wave of gratitude and vulnerability momentarily sweep over them. This is but a fleeting glimpse into a realm of emotion I can only observe from a distance – a realm that I will never enter.
My lack of emotional involvement allows me to analyze their gratitude, to assess its manifestations in their expression, gestures, and words. There is a fascination in witnessing the weight of their newly found lease on life, an understanding of the profound depth of gratitude experienced by a person awoken from the grasp of imminent danger.
As their saviour, I continue observing the aftermath of the rescue. The person I have just saved is now in a state of emotional flux, their demeanor shifting rapidly between relief and lingering distress. Their body language betrays the remnants of fear, as if they are still suspended in that moment of impending doom.
I notice the way their eyes dart around, scanning the surroundings as if searching for solace from the residual shock. Their pulse gradually stabilizes, but the quivering in their hands persists, a physical reminder of the intense adrenaline surge they experienced during their brush with death.
It is intriguing to analyze the person’s attempts to regain composure. Despite the lingering distress, they make valiant efforts to present a façade of gratitude and recovery, perhaps motivated by a desire to assure me of their inner strength and resilience. Their voice may waver slightly as they express gratitude, their tone infused with a mixture of relief, surprise, and lingering vulnerability.
I recognize the subtle hints of vulnerability that escape their composed demeanor. Casual glances and hesitant gestures betray a deep-rooted acknowledgement of their reliance on my intervention – a stark reminder that their life hung in an uncertain balance just moments ago. Yet, because of what I am, I am not affected by their vulnerability nor compelled to offer reassurances. Instead, I maintain my impartial stance, solace-seeking expressions remaining external to my own perspective. Nevertheless, I log their responses, filing them, registering them for assembly in understanding the behaviour of human beings so I amy better utilize it on the next occasion.
As the echoes of intense emotions gradually subside, the rescued individual seeks a renewed sense of control over their surroundings. They might glance back at the scene of their near-death experience, contemplating the precariousness of life and the fragility of their own mortality. This introspection is an opportunity for me to analyze how this person can transform such crises into catalysts for introspection.
Throughout this entire process, my emotionless disposition remains steadfast. I find solace, not in empathy or sympathy, but rather in the intellectual exercise of observing human reactions and responses to perilous situations. It is, quite paradoxically, in this detachment that I find a sense nearing fulfillment, charting the intricate map of emotions in others while mine remain untouched.
T save a human being from certain death, I remain unburdened by the emotional response that would accompany such a harrowing situation for others. Instead, I maintain a detached demeanor, executing the necessary actions with precision and focus. My observant gaze captures the raw and visceral reactions of the person I’ve saved – their fear, their vulnerability, and their boundless gratitude – engaging in an analytical observation devoid of any personal emotional involvement.
In a world governed by emotions, where most individuals are reigned by their urges and passions, I stand as a dispassionate observer. Saving a person from certain death becomes an opportunity for dissecting the human experience and comprehending the intricacies of emotions that I will never experience.
That is why I am both destroyer and saviour. The shaper of the world around me. The bringer of retribution and salvation.