Speaking In Wrongs

One of my other psychiatrists, I call her Doctor O (she is obsessed with me – I don’t think that’s very professional albeit it is only natural) instructed me to make a list of things that I say when I first meet somebody. I sighed and rolled my eyes. How am I meant to do that? I speak to so many people and to be honest, they all seem to merge into one to me, so it is very difficult for me to distinguish between them and recall what I have said. She was insistent however and then it dawned on me. I don’t need to remember at all. You do. After all, meeting me is such a memorable occasion my wonderful words will have been etched on your hearts forever. Seeing as I have done so much for you, perhaps you would do me a favour (you will do me a favour or else) and tell me what I said to you in the embryonic stage of our relationship. That way I can collate them and pass them to Doctor O and then perhaps she might be a little less obsessed. Don’t dilly dally though, I need to know so I will feel better.

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6 thoughts on “Speaking In Wrongs”

  1. “If you’re truly 6′, the you’re the type I’m looking for: tall, attractive, intelligent”

    (This is a copy of his first contact on an internet dating site, spelling mistakes included.)

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  2. “When I first saw you something inside of me just went ‘WOW’. I could almost hear the word as if I’d said it out loud” and “I’m yours for life, you’ll never get rid of me now..” – ominous in hindsight but said with an endearing silliness at the time.

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  3. You are everything I have ever dreamed of. Forever is the only option for us. Even if you decide you don’t love me any longer, I will make you think of me daily so no one will ever be able to take you completely away. You will always be mine. I always,thought there was something off about someone falling so completely head over heels that quickly. Now I know. It’s not real, that’s how.

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  4. “I just had to have You!”
    “You are my half, my soulmate”
    “You are the most beautiful generous kind person in the world”
    “I’ve been waiting for You all my life. I’ll never want to leave You”
    “You run through my veins”
    “I think about You every second”
    …could go on and on…the list is endless…

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  5. HG, you are a comedian and I laugh myself sick reading your blog! I want you to know how the way in which you string words together is some of the most hilarious reading material I have. Thank you. Also, I refer a lot of people to you for education. You’ve done a lot of work that has really been helpful.

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